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SpaceSDoorGunner posted:Their profile is insane. Apparently all her kids joined the military and ghosted her, and she has attempted to contact their COs to get in touch with them and has hired a PI at one point to find out info about her grand daughter. I don't even want to know what happened in that family
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Apr 13, 2020 00:56
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The kids ended up not being straight, is really the only thing that really stands out to me (other than the usual broke brains style of writing).
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Apr 13, 2020 01:43
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That poem makes it sound like one of her kids came out as trans and she took it so poorly all her kids told her to gently caress off forever.
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Apr 13, 2020 02:44
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At least two of her kids are estranged from the rest of the family, including each other
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Apr 13, 2020 02:57
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Who What Now posted:That poem makes it sound like one of her kids came out as trans and she took it so poorly all her kids told her to gently caress off forever. Bets that the mother also expected them to take over care for the autistic brother?
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Apr 13, 2020 02:57
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In the end we're all just cakes In the microwave I wish not to eat a single bite
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Apr 13, 2020 03:05
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Her kids fought all the time and the brother got braces which upset the siblings. I have a feeling there was an unequal distribution of love and material goods leading to resentment and jealousy among the kids. Probably the other child's complaint was that she spent disproportionately on the preferred brother, while they went without. "Dealt with pinworms" gives me the creeps because I wonder if the poor kid had to deal with mum's homemade curative while their brother got cosmetic bracers.
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Apr 13, 2020 03:16
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I kinda get hoarder vibes with that and the cats pissing on clothes thing.
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Apr 13, 2020 03:25
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quote:Even as teens they would resist family outings.
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Apr 13, 2020 05:37
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Picnic Princess posted:In the end Amazing.
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Apr 13, 2020 05:44
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Strong Convections posted:Her kids fought all the time and the brother got braces which upset the siblings. The brother also had Autism. Even in a functional family a kid with serious disabilities is going to get more attention and care than the other kids, and the other kids are going to resent it. Other kids in the family may be expected to give up some of their own free time and "normal childhood" to help care for the disabled sibling. Have their own problems and pain brushed aside as trivial compared to that of a disabled child. If he was profoundly disabled he could completely monopolize the parents attention. OTOH he could have been very high functioning. I have trouble picturing the low functioning types tolerating braces. So catering to his special needs could look a lot like a kid who is just a spoiled brat who gets everything he wants to the other kids. When he loses control of his emotions it's called an autistic meltdown and he gets care, but when the other kids behave in the exact same way it's called a temper tantrum and they get yelled at. It is going to feel unfair. If the parents are crap to begin with, then the extra stress of a disabled child is just going to make everything worse.
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Apr 13, 2020 06:14
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DESPITE ALL MY RAGE I AM STILL JUST A MICROWAVE CAKE
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Apr 13, 2020 11:49
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https://twitter.com/AITA_reddit/status/1249682857573916673        
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Apr 13, 2020 14:33
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Who What Now posted:That poem makes it sound like one of her kids came out as trans and she took it so poorly all her kids told her to gently caress off forever. Yeah, that was one hell of a buried lede. quote:I thought about boxing them up and taking them to her school. - So angry about her son transitioning that she was going to write his deadname on a box to shame him in front of his college friends - Refers to an email that her daughter wrote as "hateful" because the daughter used her brother's correct pronoun - Decides that her son transitioned because he hates her
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Apr 13, 2020 19:40
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The fact that she put her abhorrent behavior in poetry form is particularly nauseating for some reason.
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Apr 13, 2020 20:23
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Pope Corky the IX posted:The fact that she put her abhorrent behavior in poetry form is particularly nauseating for some reason. I get where you’re coming from. To my mind it’s combining two different flavors of narcissism, the terrible parent and the hack artist, into a veritable peanut butter cup of repulsive emotional masturbation: “not only did my child change their gender identity two gross tastes that nauseate you, together!
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Apr 13, 2020 21:02
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Foam Monkey posted:Her sister wrote the most hateful email and changed her gender. quote:If I had faith, I'd pray for that radiant look on my absent daughter's face 
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Apr 13, 2020 22:23
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There are 3 kids. One autistic brother, still around, and two afabs, both severed. Afab #1 left all the dirty dishes around. She later got rich(?) and ditched everyone. Presumably cis, most likely she's the one who has a kid now. Afab #2 transitioned and sent a "hateful" email about it. The mom refers to him as "he" in the present tense but "she" in the past tense. That's a Caitlyn Jenner thing and that's the only trans person olds know about. The mom's still probably terrible, just worth noting which kids are which.
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Apr 13, 2020 22:35
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i like nice words
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pram posted:Sorry but did they ever explain the circumstances of this to you? Or is it just an unstated thing? my mom actually did when i was 21. my sister and i kind of guessed at it when we were in the late teens since whenever i picked her up from high school her friends would ask if i was a family friend. but my mom just one weekend took me out to a expensive handbag store and bought one for me, then in the car she told me that my dad wasn't my real dad and explained that when she was in college, my dad was jealous of her friendship with other guys and accused her of cheating constantly and acting like a victim. my mom just got so tired of defending herself that when one of them did start hitting on her, she was like "yeah sure he already thinks i'm cheating what's the worst that can happen" and then she found out you can get pregnant from having sex once. in defense of my mom, i'm not angry her for cheating (just that she took that long to tell me the truth) because my dad is always convinced that he's right, like how he still believes that i sold the expensive wristwatch he got me when i was 14 and that's why he's justified in not giving me personal gifts since i'd just sell them, instead of me just losing it because i was 14, or that my biological father was breaking into their house to pee in the toilets and not that the plumbing was hosed up, and the most recent conspiracy theory he had was that my mom was poisoning him for insurance, which according to my sister he handled by moping all over the house and sighing sadly. also the past 30 years my mom has bent over backwards to try to make my dad happy, which is what she admitted to me that she's been trying to make up for her mistake since then. my dad knows because after i was born, he took me in for a blood test without my mom knowing. but even though he knows, he's super defensive and if anyone jokes (including me, before i realized) about how different i look, he starts in on this spiel about how it comes from my mother's side because her great-great-great grandpa was white or mixed (which is true, but even if some families of her side still don't look 100% chinese, they don't look like me). it's kind of a open secret but no one is willing to talk about it openly and i have no idea which of my extended family knows and is keeping quiet about it or which ones just didn't really think further about it and just accepted it.
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Apr 14, 2020 21:28
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Splash Attack posted:my mom actually did when i was 21. my sister and i kind of guessed at it when we were in the late teens since whenever i picked her up from high school her friends would ask if i was a family friend. but my mom just one weekend took me out to a expensive handbag store and bought one for me, then in the car she told me that my dad wasn't my real dad and explained that when she was in college, my dad was jealous of her friendship with other guys and accused her of cheating constantly and acting like a victim. my mom just got so tired of defending herself that when one of them did start hitting on her, she was like "yeah sure he already thinks i'm cheating what's the worst that can happen" and then she found out you can get pregnant from having sex once. "THAT RAT BASTARD IS BREAKING IN HERE AND PEEING IN MY TOILETS. I JUST KNOW IT!" Legitimately laughing pretty hard at the thought.
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Apr 14, 2020 22:27
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Splash Attack posted:it's kind of a open secret but no one is willing to talk about it openly and i have no idea which of my extended family knows and is keeping quiet about it or which ones just didn't really think further about it and just accepted it. My family is sort of the same. My older brothers are from a previous marriage of my dads and their mom hosed them up hardcore. They have several shared close friends that are pseudo sons in our family just due to the necessity of having close bonds to get them through what their mom did.
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Apr 15, 2020 00:51
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My sister and I look nothing alike, but its because I look exactly like our mom (ew) and she looks exactly like our dad (also ew). I'd like to think that maybe I had a different father, because the circumstances as how I was born are pretty wild and it might be possible (high school pact baby). All our life it's led to people not believing that we're siblings, and since neither of us use our real last names on social media, it's caused a bit of drama. One of my friends got into a massive fight with her on one of my posts, and said friend was shocked it was my sister because we have no resemblance to each other. My friend felt horrible about getting into this huge fight, but she was defending me after my sister outright attacked me on a public post so I was actually pretty happy. That whole day led to my estrangement from my sister, which was a long time coming anyway.
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Apr 15, 2020 01:05
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Batterypowered7 posted:"THAT RAT BASTARD IS BREAKING IN HERE AND PEEING IN MY TOILETS. I JUST KNOW IT!" A SWEATY FATBEARD comes to mind, during his time in the army he was found guarding the toilets 'so the enemy doesn't poo poo in them'.
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Apr 15, 2020 06:00
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I remember my parents were mortgage loan officers around 2007, and were business partners with a man named Attila. Well the whole economic situation did it's thing around that time and their business failed. My dad also somehow managed to piss off this business partner hard enough that, allegedly, Attila came to our house in the middle of the night, smashed the back window out of our car, and that's not even the scariest part. There was an office desk, that they had apparently been arguing over for some reason. Along with the smashed window, literal chunks of this office desk were strewn across the yard. And I mean ripped up pieces, like he had taken a sledgehammer to the desk or something. Seriously psycho stuff. And then, and this is the part I can't believe happened but I distinctly remember did, there was a capital B! (First initial in my dad's name) somehow cut into the lawn. So between the smashed back window, destroyed desk pieces, and creative visual graffiti, this guy must have spent a good amount of time planning and executing this revenge on my old man. I still to this day wonder just what the gently caress happened with all that. Oh and next year, to the day, he came and smashed our poo poo again. Not that any of it was ever proven. These last couple posts about lovely dad's reminded me of mine.
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Apr 15, 2020 06:26
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It still blows my mind how some parents will act like allowing their child to potentially end up homeless is some kind of teaching method. But let's call it what it really is, an attempt to leverage for control of their children's identity and life once they've flown the coop. The poster did the smart thing though. If the parents are capable of pulling that poo poo over hearsay and conjecture, then they're reactionary wild cards that should not be relied upon.
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Apr 15, 2020 16:08
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It's disappointing how often those "turned 18 am being kicked out" posts show up in r/personalfinance I don't get why people are doing it.
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Apr 15, 2020 20:04
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AuntBuck posted:It's disappointing how often those "turned 18 am being kicked out" posts show up in r/personalfinance I guess some people don’t like building generational wealth? Also, “every man is an island,” has been part of the American psyche for a very long time. It’s the myth of being entirely self-made, so naturally you want your progeny to have the same lack of advantages that made you the Randian superman you are today.
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Apr 15, 2020 23:59
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AuntBuck posted:It's disappointing how often those "turned 18 am being kicked out" posts show up in r/personalfinance There's also the non-zero number of kids who are getting thrown out for being too queer/non-god-fearing/generally nonconforming/whatever for their parents, which is a fun one to dwell on. 
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Apr 16, 2020 02:51
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Batterypowered7 posted:"THAT RAT BASTARD IS BREAKING IN HERE AND PEEING IN MY TOILETS. I JUST KNOW IT!" to be honest i couldn't stop laughing when i heard that's what he was convinced what was happening. i do care about him and my mom a lot (they both went through some rough poo poo growing up) and they have tried to make a effort to help and understand me, but the keyword is 'try'. A lot of my dad's efforts are "I don't understand why you won't do things my way/behave the way I want you to, which is clearly the superior way, and it's clear to me that your way of living is a failure because you're not doing well financially despite living in a area where people making six digits still struggle, so logically the reason why you're a unsuccessful gently caress up is because you never listen to me" my grandma is currently dying (cancer, not coronavirus) and this past week has been a mess. i ended up having to take the day off today because we're pretty sure she's near the end now and the stress of everything meant that i kind of had a breakdown near midnight along with not being able to sleep . i called my dad because i was worried about him and i let it slip that i'd taken the day off and he just started berating me, saying that my grandma would want me to be successful at work and she would never want to be the cause for being fired, and besides they weren't asking me to come in to visit her so i could just deal with it during my off hours. i ended up being more stressed and second guessing my decision that i called my boss, who gave me more sympathy and emotional support than my dad did, and said that i could take as much time off as i need to take care of myself and that he completely understood. i should mention by the way that my grandma is his own mother, but he's the type of person who hates it when people cry because he sees it as emotional manipulation. in 30 years, i've only seen him cry once and it was at his father's funeral over ten years ago. so right now he's trying to be all stoic and tough because he can't be weak or manipulative i guess???? tbh i really should have known better because a close friend of mine has told me that it's ok to care for my dad but i should stop going to him for emotional support because it's clear that i'm never going to get it from him, and she is absolutely right. i let my guard down because my mom told me over the weekend that my dad is sad because we (my sister and i) rarely talk to him and he doesn't know what to say to us. i should have known better. i am a fool. 
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Apr 17, 2020 00:03
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Splash Attack posted:
yeesh, sorry. My father was a lot like that (which, I dunno, is unfortunately a generational thing with a lot of these guys) except also a mean bastard. But that all sounds exhausting, I'm sorry you're having to deal with it.
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Apr 17, 2020 00:34
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Splash Attack posted:stuff Sorry you're having to deal with this on top of coronavirus. People will tell you to give your dad some leeway for acting out and lashing out during this loss. You can ignore that advice or that instinct, especially if this is his regular MO. Take care of yourself.
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Apr 17, 2020 00:40
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Whaddup fellow selfish cold hearted ACs. Glad to see Issendai recommended widely here, I've been a fan of hers for a long time. She also has a short series on her blog about sovereign citizens if you want another rabbit hole of self-obsessed reality deniers to fall down. How do you stop obsessing over the parent you've cut off and wallowing in what could have been? I've been attempting to come to terms with my estrangement from my dad for a couple months; I finally stopped speaking with him in February when he refused to tell me whether he was coming (??) to my gay wedding. Our relationship has been rocky for years, what with his gradual transformation into an alt-right ecofascist gun nut, and he had a huge falling out with my sister last year that has dominated all our conversations. I've tried to simultaneously set boundaries (no politics talk, no asking me about my sister) while holding out olive branch after olive branch in the hopes that I could get back the dad that I remembered. This past Christmas, he consented to go out to dinner with me and my fiancée. I thought the visit was going okay aside from his constant derailments into hating the Chinese and his inability to talk or care about anything happening in my or my fiancée's life, but then I mentioned something about my sister, and he said "I have no daughters." I'm right here, man. A couple weeks ago, out of the blue, he texted me that he was watching Breaking Bad and "now understands why everyone hates the wife character" and "the bald scientist whose family betrayed him died in the end, big surprise" (he is bald and a scientist). I'm justified in not speaking to him, right? There's nothing I could have done better, no more chances I could have given him to show up for an important day in my life? I can't stand the thought of him being able to hold anything I've done against me. I guess I'm pretty well trained if I still feel like this is my fault  Anyway: Content! Some memes from "estranged parents/grandparents" facebook groups:      The most liked comment on the eyebrow ring kid post was this: quote:I am so over this "what's in the child best interest", statement, I've heard it thrown around for years by caseworkers in child protection agencies who do not want to answer my questions, in family courts because they can, and by parents who do not want to answer my questions, parents who steal their children from their grandparents because they have no valid reason as to why they've decided to do so and then poison the children's minds with lies and defamatory statements, contradicting their own statement .... If you have no valid reason, or can't tell us or them WHY? you have seperated us from each other then GIVE THEM BACK, stop punishing the children because you have your own issues, stop throwing 😨around "what's in the childs best interest," statement because IT IS NOT!!! ... give back our children because being with their Grandparents is what's in their best interest, not yours, theirs 😒 The real reason you, the parent, stole my grandchild from me is because you had no reason to do so! I see right through your twisted games
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Apr 17, 2020 19:32
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snailshell posted:Whaddup fellow selfish cold hearted ACs. Glad to see Issendai recommended widely here, I've been a fan of hers for a long time. She also has a short series on her blog about sovereign citizens if you want another rabbit hole of self-obsessed reality deniers to fall down. Waiting for someone else to change is futile. It's okay to give up there. There's nothing you could do except hang around and experience more horrible treatment. It's hard though. You've effectively lost your father. I cut my narcissist dad off for a year for incredibly stupid, abusive behavior. I see a lot of people talking about how great and uplifting severing can be, but I felt like garbage for the first few months. It got better with time and after making some more life changes. Give yourself that time to grieve and time to see things from a new perspective. It became clear to me that a lot of things that supposedly were my fault or my responsibility weren't, to both me and my dad.
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Apr 17, 2020 21:33
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I finally decided to poke around for that rejected parents forum and pull some content to share. These make me grateful that I'm on the lesser scale of rear end in a top hat parents. I'm trying to follow an earlier format of quoting a bunch of posts all from one poster (hopefully not grabbing any dupes!) This is all one poster, who has been pretty prolific, posted oldest to newest (cherry picking cause there are like 250+ posts from this person starting from a year ago). Overall not the most egregious posts I've seen posted earlier but I figured I'd start with a not as crazy one 5/9/2019 quote:I have been reading Rejected Parents for several months now. It was a surprise to know there was such a forum for this. Thank you for accepting me into your group. Years ago I came to terms with the estrangement from my daughter. She has long become a distant memory. The heart wrenching years have passed and acceptance took its place. But I have carried with me since Nov 23rd a posting by Rainbow. In it she had a chance to possibly reconnect with her son and family. She decided not to open the door and pursue it. At least not in the way it was presented. What surprised me was the overwhelming relief that came over me after reading her posting. I didn’t know I was carrying this with me. Should I try one more time? I don’t want to open that door but I suppose I must have been feeling deep down that I should. Rainbow’s posting brought to me relief that it’s okay not to. It takes such a long time to come to terms and just can’t go back to where it all started. 5/12/2019 quote:Movingonwithmylife, I think you have to experience the intense anger to let it go. I have a journal I wrote 20+ years ago. Oh my, the names I called my daughter. I’m not a violent person but my husband bought me a punching bag. The best therapy ever. I would beat the **** out of it and walk away feeling completely calm. My daughter had done some horrible things. Punching bag went to Goodwill many years ago. 5/15/2019 quote:My son-in-law calls it revisionist history. It either didn’t happen or it didn’t happen in that way. I have not seen or talked to my estranged daughter in almost five years. Right before the break (as she called it), she sent me a list of my atrocities. Needless to say it was astonishing. I shared it with family and we all were perplexed (to put it mildly). Other family members’ atrocities were also included. My last contact with her I did offer to pay for counseling. I was told not to contact her again. This is not our first estrangement. My predictable behavior would have been to continually reach out to her but it had been a roller coaster for 23 years. The difference this time, mom is getting old and tired. After 23 years, all of this needed to come to an end. So there it is, five years later of no contact. 6/16/2019 quote:I have come to realize, you teach people how to treat you. You’re right sadlostbroken, if you don’t have healthy boundaries, if you don’t take care of yourself, people pick-up on this and they will take advantage of you. It’s taken me a long time to understand this. 6/24/2019 quote:I’m going to sound a little self-righteous but here goes. I have lived the extreme from one end to another. Our mother abandoned my siblings and I when we were young. It was a tough, tough childhood full of pain for all us. Yet, most of us desperately yearned for her attention and love all these years regardless of how things went down. Even to this day, in the elderly state she is, we look after her. I can’t say we receive loving treatment from her in return but in her own damaged way I think she thinks she tries. We have tried to understand her. Not all my siblings are on the same page. There is deep justified residue anger from some. 8/11/2019 quote:When a veterinarian diagnoses an animal, the animal can’t tell them the problem. The veterinarian doesn’t know if it ate something, may not always know exactly where it is hurting, may not always know the cause, etc. The animal, in its lack of understanding, may just bite the doctor. But a veterinarian will continue to do everything within their power to get to the bottom of things until they can do no more. 8/27/2019 quote:When they’re young you can somehow say they don’t have the life experiences to know what they’re doing or too immature to realize their actions I dealt with my first estrangement when my daughter was 18 – 24 yrs old. Did not see her for almost 6 years. Heavily influenced by others. Next 13 years walked on egg shells with all sorts of painful ups and downs. This last estrangement she is/was 37 to 42 yrs old. She knows exactly what she is doing. 8/29/2019 quote:believe if you are estranging your child to hurt them, that’s one thing, if you’re estranging them to teach them a lesson, it’s another thing and if you’re estranging them to protect yourself, that’s a completely different thing. 10/25/2019 quote:Aussiemom, thank you for your kind words. 11/21/2019 quote:I come from a different perspective. My mother abandoned my siblings and I when we were small. From ten years old (me) to the youngest at two. Growing up, this shattered concept of family for many of my siblings. At 87 my mother is not that person from 55 years ago. Oddly she recently asked if we all could get together as we have not been in the same room for at least twenty –five years. 12/22/2019 quote:Sheri is so right in everything she has said. 1/10/2020 quote:2soon, Yes they seem to have selective memories or creative memories of things that never happened. Photographs and videos are our “evidence” that they did not live a life of doom and gloom and mistreatment. I’ve always wondered. . . when we are no longer on earth, when they have those memories keepers in hand, will the truth resurface? Would they realize the wrong they have caused us? 2/12/2020 quote:Mistakes are the nature of human beings. Mistakes don’t make a bad parent. Our perfect, never-made-a-mistake estranged children are very good at laying blame and guilt. A seemingly innocent incident turns into you’re an abusive parent. But it becomes worse than that. Something that never even happened is fabricated in their minds and you’re sentenced to a life of punishment. 2/28/2020 quote:In reference to my above posting. Some of you might be thinking, in the back of your mind “How can my version of the events be so different from my daughter’s? 3/18/2020 quote:AntionaZ, I thought your posting was very insightful. Estrangement isn’t just about our child no longer a meaningful part of our life. So much hurt comes from the people who rally behind our estranged child, have their own agenda, the negative chit-chat that goes with it, the unsolicited opinions and, like you said, the ultimate shunning of us. 4/16/2020 quote:Happy, I know you’ve been dealt some rotten cards in life. It seems it’s not one thing or another that piles up on us and before we know it we have all this baggage we so desperately want to get rid of. The only way I know how to survive these rotten cards is to eliminate everything negative around us. To only allow lifestyle and people in our lives that aren’t a burden and don’t compromise our well-being. 4/16/2020 quote:As far as I know, there’s no “cure” for narcissism. Unless they go through some traumatic event that snaps them into reality or dramatically changes their perspective. I dealt with the same kinds of things you did newnormal, in order to have contact with my granddaughter. I don’t regret it but I would never go through that again. It took a lot out of me.
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Apr 18, 2020 05:36
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This was in today's Daily Mail - piece of crap newspaper in the UK, but thought this was quite interesting and telling, it is so me me me. There is no mention in the question or reply that some children may have a very valid reason for not speaking to their parents.... Dear Bel, I wrote to you in September 2017 about my estrangement from my son and three grandsons, which you printed. Galvanised by your support, I founded the Oxfordshire Grandparents’ Support Group then wrote a book, Beyond All Belief: A Living Bereavement — Understanding Estrangement And How To Survive It (by Diana Dunk). Now, all our lives have changed and we have descended into fear and uncertainty as coronavirus spreads. Families are forced apart. Grandparents who normally see their grandchildren are unable to. They miss the hugs, but can at least have online virtual meetings or telephone. What about estranged grandparents who find this crisis even more distressing? We have no way of knowing how our families are. In times of adversity it’s always family we turn to — the people closest who love us. The ones we can depend on most for support. But this is not true for about two million grandchildren in the UK estranged from their grandparents. We remain alone and forgotten with no word from our adult children. Many of us have sent messages only to be ignored, leaving us not knowing whether our precious family remain safe or whether they have caught the deadly virus. To be denied any contact at such a time is hideously cruel and can surely never be justified — no matter what previous disagreements there were before the pandemic. Surely this is the time to end the silent treatment. There has never been a better time for a short text to ask how we’re doing. Isn’t it just simple human kindness? DIANA Your letter — so very sad and true — makes me wonder if ‘human kindness’ is always ‘simple’. Yes, we can give to charities and (if we go to the supermarket) pop a couple of tins into the food bank basket. But does giving to strangers — when little is required of us but entering bank details or (in those days when there was street life) passing a coin or two to a beggar — make us feel good about ourselves? Yes — and why not? May we all show genuine charity, remembering that the other meaning is ‘love’. But how much more complicated is the ‘kindness’ that wrenches deep, painfully complicated feelings from our innermost selves. This is the kindness which says we have hurt each other so much and now the silence between us stretches as if from one side of the globe to each other. So now, in this dark time, let us hold out a hand to each other. Let us forgive. Let us realise that when death takes one of us, the other may weep bitter tears at what has been lost. Such compassion is very hard indeed when a family is estranged. But surely one of the whole points of walking this earth as a human being is to display qualities which make us rise above our worst selves? I have no doubt of it. You, Diana, write: ‘There has never been a better time for a short text to ask how we’re doing.’ And another grandmother who has contacted this page before, Lorraine Bushell, founder of the Hendon Grandparents Support Group, writes: ‘Only one of my families so far has been able to speak to her grandchild. But none of the others have heard from their children or grandchildren. ‘It’s such an ongoing tragedy. I am so disheartened as I thought perhaps in this terrible time of self-isolation more of my grandparents would have heard from their children.’ Well, so would I, Lorraine and Diana. What can I say? Honestly, I’d actually test my dodgy right hip and go down on my knees and beg the younger generation who cherish their grievances to be better. Yes, older people can be difficult. Tempers might have flared. In-law issues often grate. Harsh words might have been said. Jealousy might have caused nastiness. Don’t think you can tell me anything about any of that! I know it — and yet I still beg: show pity in the time of coronavirus. If there is somebody you’re estranged from, please melt the chip of ice in your heart. Even a short text will be an act of love. Please.
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Apr 18, 2020 13:27
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Splash Attack posted:my grandma is his own mother This would be a really cool name for a GSV. Sorry. Carry on.
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Apr 19, 2020 02:42
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It's been quiet on the estranged parent forums but then this showed up quote:I haven’t posted in a while. Been way too depressed to talk and so has my husband. I’m still so scattered and angry, that I know this post will be incoherent.
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Apr 19, 2020 04:50
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trickybiscuits posted:It's been quiet on the estranged parent forums but then this showed up The rest of that post is insane too, of course, but I just hate the idea that proper triage is done based on who 'deserves to live more'. We don't live in an unprejudiced world, and biases do creep in, but as far as I understand it, that's part of why triage instruction and training is standardized over larger networks, because the point is to be able to best distribute resources. (of course, the rich and powerful will almost always find ways to move up the ranks, but that's another discussion. There's no way Boris Johnson wasn't going to get a ventilator if he needed one, even if things had been stretched tight enough that proper triage would have pushed him aside, but... well, it's not about deserving to live.)
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Apr 19, 2020 06:02
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It's not just based on chances of survival, it is based on who "deserves to live more" -- for two patients otherwise the same, they prioritize one who has kids over one who doesn't. It's hosed up but it is an actual professional standard.
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Apr 19, 2020 06:14
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Anne Whateley posted:It's not just based on chances of survival, it is based on who "deserves to live more" -- for two patients otherwise the same, they prioritize one who has kids over one who doesn't. It's hosed up but it is an actual professional standard. Honestly though I think everything about triage in an emergency situation is hosed up from an emotional standpoint and that's not a part of the process you should get too comfortable with. If it happens it's because there's not enough resources to go around and that means something hosed up has happened, whether that's a natural disaster or what.
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Apr 19, 2020 06:25
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