|
The it nerd is standing in front of my desk, spittle flying out of his sputtering mouth as he is jabbering on and on about some "firewall" and "security" or some bullshit. I watch as his head turns redder and redder while his feeble arms pound the table in front of me. With a smirk I unpack a brand new tablet from an unknown Chinese company. It's cheaper and slicker than any of the dumb things these nerds want me to use. I slowly and deliberately connect it to the wifi while the guy gets tears in his eye. He slinks off defeated after a few minutes, as he knows he cannot win. The ceo and I share a WhatsApp group for funny memes. We're tight. I can haz tablez.
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 11:44
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 27, 2024 07:04 |
|
|
ELI PORTER posted:HR incompetent, wat else is knew Not just incompetent, but bosses narks and scabs to a woman
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 11:51
|
|
|
DickParasite posted:We spend 3 million/year in licence fees for completely broken enterprise software. It's used for everything - procurement, payroll, work orders, but nothing works so people have had to develop workarounds. This was supposed to eliminate a bunch of the paperwork involved in running the organisation, but it's actually increased all of that. The geniuses in senior management decided to buy a version that was nearing EOL and after two years of working to patch the holes announced we're rolling back to the release version to prepare for the switch to the new version. Lol this smells like WorkDay to me
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 11:56
|
|
|
A CRAB IRL posted:Lol this smells like WorkDay to me That, or SAP.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 12:36
|
|
|
TontoCorazon posted:God I loving love working for a government agency, I've never had to do that bullshit fake rear end pretending to be happy about our jobs, also none of this conference dance bullshit. Boss sets up meeting every two weeks to a month just to catch up and update us on policy and regulation changes then we're done. I also work for a government agency but unfortunately I work for one that has to be staffed 24/7 and I work the midnight shift (I'm a night owl and it pays better anyway). All mandatory training seminars are held in the early afternoons. We are not exempt from them. They're also refusing to do them as teleconferences right now. We have to actually show up and sit in a staff room for 4 hours while we get lectured about Diversity and Implicit Bias and what YOU can do to make sure it doesn't affect your work! At 1pm. On a day where I got off work at 7am and have to be back at 10:30pm. CuwiKhons fucked around with this message at 12:42 on Jan 31, 2021 |
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 12:37
|
|
|
CuwiKhons posted:I also work for a government agency but unfortunately I work for one that has to be staffed 24/7 and I work the midnight shift (I'm a night owl and it pays better anyway). All mandatory training seminars are held in the early afternoons. We are not exempt from them. They're also refusing to do them as teleconferences right now. We have to actually show up and sit in a staff room for 4 hours while we get lectured about Diversity and Implicit Bias and what YOU can do to make sure it doesn't affect your work! Hopefully everyone is wearing a mask! I am so sorry for what must be an unimaginable stress level in these trying times
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 12:38
|
|
|
Zarin posted:That, or SAP. ding ding ding!
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 12:42
|
|
|
Zarin posted:Hopefully everyone is wearing a mask! Haha, we're in Florida. Nobody is wearing a mask unless ordered to do so by law. Just last week I overheard my supervisor complaining to my assistant supervisor that "masks don't even work anyway, I can't believe Publix makes me put one on at the door. Walmart doesn't even bother anymore at least." Oh yeah, that's the other thing. They wont' let us work from home. Even though our entire job is online. They've decided it's a security risk and don't want to buy us laptops. Even though it would help an awful lot even once the pandemic is over because we're considered 'essential staff' during emergencies, which means we have to show up for work during major hurricanes too. Now don't get me wrong, the building I work in is probably safer to be in for a hurricane than my lovely apartment, but it also means we're not actually allowed to evacuate.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 12:47
|
|
|
Fedex has a repository of like terabites of various excel macros because their actual tools suck so much it almost impossible to describe
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 12:48
|
|
|
DickParasite posted:ding ding ding! Ahhh, SAP. *stares wistfully and/or traumatically into the middle distance* Tickets with SAP Support for what should have been critical issues dragged on for 6 months or longer; it's a good thing I was clever and/or stupid enough to come up with workarounds. It got to the point where I began to lose track of what our process truly was, and what parts of our workflow were workarounds and/or steps that were literally relying on known bugs/flaws/issues with SAP that would throw the entire office into chaos if we ever applied a patch to (finally) correct them. You can make a lot of money if you know SAP, but goddamn if SAP doesn't make you earn every loving dollar.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 12:52
|
|
|
Chrs posted:I hold the controller under the desk during poo poo meetings. "Oh yeah have you noticed that Chrs guy just wanks all the time during meetings? That's such an alpha move - we're thinking of promoting them!"
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 12:54
|
|
|
Zarin posted:Ahhh, SAP. *stares wistfully and/or traumatically into the middle distance* SAP is great tho* ** *if you have an army of consultants making it work **and if you're a manufacturer of actual physical goods in Germany
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 14:03
|
|
|
SAP makes me miss using peoplesoft
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 14:40
|
|
|
yaffle posted:Our school switched from zoom to teams because "zoom is banned in china" (it still works). If you think zoom is irritating, try to imagine a Microsoft version. And, if you're bored you can switch it to "under the sea" mode where then on your screen (and your screen only) all of the participants with cameras on are bobbing about among the ocean coral while they're talking about today's numbers.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 14:40
|
|
|
I've never worked with teams before my current job and I like it a lot, having meetings and stuff managed over my own calender is cool.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 14:41
|
|
|
Zarin posted:Ahhh, SAP. *stares wistfully and/or traumatically into the middle distance* Sorry you're too poor for MaxAttention 
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 14:51
|
|
|
A CRAB IRL posted:Lol this smells like WorkDay to me Workday is our latest 'in thing' everyone has to use for no reason. Every 12-18 months they decided to use some big management software that will make our lives quicker and easier. However they don't actually purchase all the parts needed of that software, just the bare bones. So poo poo ends up on us peons doing HR's work now manually copying and pasting our work schedules each week as its cheaper than buying that part that will do it automatically. The last system did.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 14:59
|
|
|
IT tears sustain me. Only accounting is a lower form of life to me
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 15:00
|
|
|
WILDTURKEY101 posted:zoom meetings for "self care" Chaturbate already has this functionality.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 15:02
|
|
|
Speaking of accounting. If I want to get money for any project I have to write out these stupid approval for expenditures. Basically they want me to distil down the project to something an accountant can understand which makes no sense to me because accountants think that customers are an inconvenience that messes up spreadsheets and so they do their best to eliminate them. They are incapable of understanding awesome things because they are the distillation of moss growing on rocks. They need the rock to never move to survive. So I have begun structuring them as Eight Legged Essays to see if they get the joke but oddly enough they like them more now.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 15:12
|
|
|
Watched everyone quit and promoted me to run the company. I have exactly zero management experience or training. I made some some basic pie charts with big numbers, presented them at a meeting and proposed a massive increase to my wages budget to better manage things. It looks like this will be approved, everyone is extremely happy with the work so far and my bold new vision for the company. I have three years to figure out how to do my job before our funding runs out. Nobody seems to have any problems with this.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 15:19
|
|
|
Has people come into work even if the people in their house have covid because "you don't have any symptoms it's fine" and "you don't have your results back yet so you don't have it"
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 16:59
|
|
|
Noblesse Obliged posted:IT tears sustain me. Nah it's still HR
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 17:03
|
|
|
Len posted:Has people come into work even if the people in their house have covid because "you don't have any symptoms it's fine" and "you don't have your results back yet so you don't have it" Holy gently caress that's reprehensible.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 17:03
|
|
|
A CRAB IRL posted:Nah it's still HR
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 17:03
|
|
|
Outrail posted:Holy gently caress that's reprehensible. My company is owned by chuds who believe this is no different than the flu 
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 17:11
|
|
|
Starting a new job soon. It's possible I'm ignorant and not aware this is standard consultancy practice, but I find it donkey brained that I have to fill my timesheet on the 15th every month with the number of hours worked up until the 15th and then "estimate" the hours I'm going to work until the end of the month.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 17:27
|
|
|
Our entire dev and QA departments have to get background checked and fingerprinted every time we get a new client despite the fact that they cannot view actual client data. Because security The clients routinely send me emails with enough PPI to steal the identities of thousands of people despite being repeatedly told to stop. I don't even have security training because I'm not a dev.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 17:32
|
|
|
Zarin posted:Ahhh, SAP. *stares wistfully and/or traumatically into the middle distance* It’s so drat bad. If a user’s password is expired, why not pop up a screen telling them to reset their password instead of a baffling error message?
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 17:39
|
|
|
We're moving onto a new ticket system because the rest of the company is and we're being forced to, but our engineering group is so stubborn and has the company wrapped around their finger that they refused to change and are sticking with JIRA which actually works a lot better for their needs than this new one. As it turns out the new ticket system is barely ready and still mostly broken after being in the works for about a year now but because they've poured so many resources into it they're forcing everyone to migrate NOW and provide DAILY FEEDBACK about how GREAT this new system is. The pisser is my department facilitates discussions and bug fixes/feature requests between the entire company and the engineers, so we are being asked to use both systems at the same time, creating tickets in the new one to say that we had to make a ticket in JIRA and putting a link to the JIRA ticket in the ticket we made in the new system. When talking to my boss about how loving asinine this is his response was a shrug emoji. They should ban that emoji from Slack.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 17:46
|
|
|
A CRAB IRL posted:Lol this smells like WorkDay to me Our HR/Payroll dept hyped that poo poo up so much before rolling it out. Barely usable trash. Congratulations on making a UI that is even shittier than ADP's. Really loving impressive how hard you hosed that one up.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 17:50
|
|
|
Hyrax Attack! posted:It’s so drat bad. If a user’s password is expired, why not pop up a screen telling them to reset their password instead of a baffling error message? I've run into SAP Fieldglass, which is a Timesheet management thing for contractors. I forgot my password in a storm of making new passwords. The 'Forgot Password' button asks for my email and username. I put it in, and all it ever does is email me my username over and over. I submitted a ticket to their customer service desk. They responded and said "'We're sending you an email with a reset password link. Reply ACCEPT if this has solved your issue, or REJECT if it doesn't." And of course, no email ever arrived. Just remembered my password in the end and spitefully never replied because hot drat what is wrong with your system.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 17:58
|
|
|
hot cocoa on the couch posted:My current job is actually pretty great, not much to complain about, aside from the workload/pace being a bit frantic at times but management is generally understanding and supportive of us. I have worked a few engineering jobs now though and I have to ask, does ANYONE in engineering/manufacturing use good ERP software? They all seem like they were written by some loving university student who just discovered Access. Why is enterprise software always so bad? I don't get it I used to work for Epicor, an ERP and POS software company. I can tell you with confidence that 3 people wrote most of the software. The POS software was literally one guy and most of his time was spent customizing the software to include the clients branding. Is the new patch out? No, because Khan is making sure the backgrounds on the Coach POS are all centered exactly. Our ticketing system was in dos and didn't support mice, this was in 2015.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 18:06
|
|
|
Cyber Punk 90210 posted:I used to work for Epicor, an ERP and POS software company. I can tell you with confidence that 3 people wrote most of the software. The POS software was literally one guy and most of his time was spent customizing the software to include the clients branding. Is the new patch out? No, because Khan is making sure the backgrounds on the Coach POS are all centered exactly. Oh hahaha. Ya mattec. I love running the coms cable right up tight to the main 3ph 1000amp bus bar. Saves a bunch of space and looks better.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 18:20
|
|
|
Noblesse Obliged posted:Oh hahaha. Ya mattec. I love running the coms cable right up tight to the main 3ph 1000amp bus bar. Saves a bunch of space and looks better. As a controls engineer this makes me shudder.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 18:25
|
|
|
Of course it’s not grounded it’s attached to the ceiling. Honestly you guys sound so dumb sometimes
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 18:29
|
|
|
Noblesse Obliged is a corporate spy in case you haven't caught on.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 18:31
|
|
|
Armitag3 posted:Starting a new job soon. It's possible I'm ignorant and not aware this is standard consultancy practice, but I find it donkey brained that I have to fill my timesheet on the 15th every month with the number of hours worked up until the 15th and then "estimate" the hours I'm going to work until the end of the month. Holy poo poo, I thought this was loving stupid when my old job wanted me to do this for friday afternoon. Half a goddamn month, that is the dumbest poo poo on the planet.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 18:44
|
|
|
Len posted:Has people come into work even if the people in their house have covid because "you don't have any symptoms it's fine" and "you don't have your results back yet so you don't have it" My MegaCorp with over 5,000 people in the office confused and nervous in March 2020 was slow to allow any WFC as who knows what the drones may do without their mandatory daily gratitude sessions. HR was so tone deaf about employees worried about how to deal with school closures or people in their household at high risk that they sent out a pointless update, then got in an internal fight because it had a typo and the subject line appeared twice. Then someone died and we all got sent home and I discovered I can do 100% of my work remotely.
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 18:45
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 27, 2024 07:04 |
|
|
One thing I like about my company is there’s no forced “bonding” bullshit. They pay us well and expect a lot from us but I’m at work to work, not hang out. I see now writing this makes me seem like an rear end in a top hat but I have a family and friends outside work, I don’t need to hang out with work people outside of work or take time away from regular projects
|
|
#
?
Jan 31, 2021 19:01
|
|
