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morestuff
Aug 2, 2008

You can't stop what's coming

R.D. Mangles posted:

he kaiser soze'd them

was just a long-form improv character he was workshopping

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Dejan Bimble
Mar 24, 2008

we're all black friends
Plaster Town Cop

R.D. Mangles posted:

he kaiser soze'd them

i don't blame blake for dogging it for a poo poo team, but i don't understand why he is staring down his former teammates.

They're probably pissed at him for collecting the majority of salary on the team while pretending to be bad at basketball so he could get sent somewhere else. How many dollars a year will it take for a guy to play hard in a city he doesn't enjoy the vibe of. I consider him to have forefeitted his basketball spirit and that is enough to curse the Nets.

Shrimp or Shrimps
Feb 14, 2012


If Blake was dogging it for the Pistons, it's not hard to imagine some of his former teammates might have a problem with that and also possibly have said something.

But on the other hand, Blake seems like totally the kind of guy to stare down his former teammates for no reason after a dunk because it's what bullies do, and he's got that mad bully energy.

Or maybe he had a hidden crew filming it for his prank show so he could show up later in the locker room and be like, it's just a prank my bros lmao.

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

Blake Griffin: Stares down old teammates, runs from billionaires

Real friend of the proletariat

Lockback
Sep 3, 2006

All days are nights to see till I see thee; and nights bright days when dreams do show me thee.

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Is there a more accurate rundown over what happened? Maybe a detailed critical review of the series?

I don't know about definitive sources but things like Pippen absolutely being gone regardless, Jordan was signaling hard that he was probably done after 98 were really glossed over. Like, the documentary made a big deal about jordan denying that he was going to retire but why do you think he kept being asked that? He was telling everyone when the camera was off that he was gone. He really didn't want to come back after 97 and they had to give him a giant pile of money on a one year deal. Of course Krause was making other plans, that was his job. And Reinsdorf 100% was on board with everything Krause did, that's why Krause had a job for like 5 years after Jordan left. Reinsdorf was really a shithead in his segments.

I think Krause probably pushed Phil out, but that was not the lynchpin that the documentary made it out to be. The team wasn't coming back and Phil would have been terrible leading a rebuild.

SamuraiFoochs
Jan 16, 2007




Grimey Drawer
I just have to point out I'm grateful that this forum doesn't do the whole RINGZ thing. If I try to read NBA discussions anywhere else, holy poo poo.

kingcobweb
Apr 16, 2005

SamuraiFoochs posted:

I just have to point out I'm grateful that this forum doesn't do the whole RINGZ thing. If I try to read NBA discussions anywhere else, holy poo poo.

That's because I haven't posted my magnum opus about JaVale yet.

Bashez
Jul 19, 2004

:10bux:

MourningView posted:

Sort of but a lot of the issues were the owner being cheap and letting Krause take all the bullets for it because Krause already wasn't well liked by the players or Phil.

The dynasty as it existed was probably pretty close to being on the way out either way; Pippen was completely shot physically.

Jordan had one of his worst years and was showing his age too. They were done as overwhelming favorites. For matchup reasons I don't think they had much of a shot against the Spurs.

There was the whole lockout thing too.

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

Lockback posted:

I don't know about definitive sources but things like Pippen absolutely being gone regardless, Jordan was signaling hard that he was probably done after 98 were really glossed over. Like, the documentary made a big deal about jordan denying that he was going to retire but why do you think he kept being asked that? He was telling everyone when the camera was off that he was gone. He really didn't want to come back after 97 and they had to give him a giant pile of money on a one year deal. Of course Krause was making other plans, that was his job. And Reinsdorf 100% was on board with everything Krause did, that's why Krause had a job for like 5 years after Jordan left. Reinsdorf was really a shithead in his segments.

I think Krause probably pushed Phil out, but that was not the lynchpin that the documentary made it out to be. The team wasn't coming back and Phil would have been terrible leading a rebuild.

It's very important for teams to find some common cause to rally behind or common enemy to unify everyone, especially old tired teams that were just sick of the grind. Krause not only was that guy but bumbled into that role with aplomb. While he wasn't the evil wizard behind the scenes ruining everything, I absolutely believe every single one of those players despised him as much as they said they did.

xbilkis
Apr 11, 2005

god qb
me
jay hova
It seems like people are suggesting Blake Griffin almost...pranked the Pistons by pretending he was washed. If only there were someone who was willing to turn the tables and prank the pranksters, ideally on national television in what I presume would be a never-before-seen twist, then maybe justice could be served...

Salvor_Hardin
Sep 13, 2005

I want to go protest.
Nap Ghost
Just informing the dudes here that there is a twitter dedicated to kyle lowry's rear end: https://twitter.com/lowrymadthicc

kingcobweb
Apr 16, 2005

Bashez posted:

Jordan had one of his worst years and was showing his age too. They were done as overwhelming favorites. For matchup reasons I don't think they had much of a shot against the Spurs.

There was the whole lockout thing too.

What I've heard (from a freedarko essayist, maybe other people too) is that the labor dispute only bubbled over because Jordan retired. If he had kept the golden age of Jordan going, there was enough money coming in that ownership wouldn't be as cutthroat and lock the players out.

Rick
Feb 23, 2004
When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.
The siren call of Andre Drummond has subsided after a win tonight.

kingcobweb
Apr 16, 2005
Jokic did a euro step so slow that two defenders three stooges-style ran into each other

https://twitter.com/nuggets/status/1375631383226249217

Bashez
Jul 19, 2004

:10bux:

kingcobweb posted:

What I've heard (from a freedarko essayist, maybe other people too) is that the labor dispute only bubbled over because Jordan retired. If he had kept the golden age of Jordan going, there was enough money coming in that ownership wouldn't be as cutthroat and lock the players out.

My understanding of that lockout is it was essentially guaranteed to happen after Garnett got 126 million guaranteed at 21 years old.

Apparently they also had short work stoppages that didn't cost games in 95 and 96.

EmotionlessThug
Feb 14, 2012

kingcobweb posted:

Jokic did a euro step so slow that two defenders three stooges-style ran into each other

https://twitter.com/nuggets/status/1375631383226249217

King

Rick
Feb 23, 2004
When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.

xbilkis posted:

It seems like people are suggesting Blake Griffin almost...pranked the Pistons by pretending he was washed. If only there were someone who was willing to turn the tables and prank the pranksters, ideally on national television in what I presume would be a never-before-seen twist, then maybe justice could be served...

Blake Griffin’s JR Smith moment then wink to the camera will be worth watching all 43 episodes of the show to get to.

Stevie Lee
Oct 8, 2007
a real MVP woulda dunked that

anakha
Sep 16, 2009


Pippen in 98 was a spiteful moron who pulled the 'Imma heal on company time' stunt with that foot surgery, which forced Jordan and an already-aging Bulls rotation to log more minutes to stay competitive. Rodman was starting to skip practices and probably was nearing a point where even Phil couldn't rein him in anymore.

That 98 team also had the least bench depth since they were already committed to starting Kukoc in the playoffs. They were definitely on their last gasp as contenders even if Pippen by some miracle decided to stay after 98.

Declan MacManus
Sep 1, 2011

damn i'm really in this bitch

Bashez posted:

My understanding of that lockout is it was essentially guaranteed to happen after Garnett got 126 million guaranteed at 21 years old.

Apparently they also had short work stoppages that didn't cost games in 95 and 96.

yeah, all the other owners were mad at glen taylor for essentially blowing up the labor market by paying a young kg his actual market value along with a bunch of other stuff (3 year first round rookie wage scale which allowed kg to sign that deal in the first place, chris webber forcing his way out after a year, the salary cap being so soft as to be meaningless)

the nbapa was expecting the nba to be shut down every single season past 95; the ringer has a really good article on it

MourningView
Sep 2, 2006


Is this Heaven?

Bashez posted:

Jordan had one of his worst years and was showing his age too. They were done as overwhelming favorites. For matchup reasons I don't think they had much of a shot against the Spurs.

There was the whole lockout thing too.

Jordan also would have missed most of that next season anyway, before he actually retired he almost hacked off the tip of one finger with a cigar cutter.

Yoshi Wins
Jul 14, 2013

The great ones tell their distal phalanges, NOT TODAY.

Algund Eenboom
May 4, 2014

WhyteRyce posted:

It’s cool that Blake can actually jump a bit still but it’s funny people are all drat BLAKE over a couple of pedestrian NBA dunks

Before joining the nets Blake hadn’t dunked since the calendar year 2019

paternity suitor
Aug 2, 2016


He's so fun to watch, pure energy

chilihead
Nov 5, 2010

Is this real life, or is this fantasy?

G-Hawk posted:

Next level tanking: letting Minnesota close the game on a 22-0 run

https://twitter.com/AdamJWexler/status/1375634012669161475?s=19

Can't they fine a team for this or something? I mean every year teams will play all scrubs the last month but it isn't even April yet! Also the players still try to score.
I know because i watched the Magic almost beat the Blazers last night with a 7 man rotation led by superstar Chuma Okeke. Tilman must have promised them all free Bubba Gump shrimp for life or something.

Tae
Oct 24, 2010

Hello? Can you hear me? ...Perhaps if I shout? AAAAAAAAAH!
Legit teams have gone scoreless for that long, so it's harder to prove it's tanking

a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


I would not trade Paul Reed for Anthony Davis.

a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


Maybe if LAL included some sweeteners

Lockback
Sep 3, 2006

All days are nights to see till I see thee; and nights bright days when dreams do show me thee.
Houston was only up that much because they were shooting like 55% from 3, once that dried up their offense looked like their lineup should look. Houston doesn't get anything by tanking, their lottery odds are as good as they can get for a top 4 pick, outside that OKC gets the pick. Houston just sucks.

Bismack Billabongo
Oct 9, 2012

New Love Glow

kingcobweb posted:

DNP - BACK injury

AggressivelyStupid
Jan 9, 2012

anakha posted:

Pippen in 98 was a spiteful moron who pulled the 'Imma heal on company time' stunt with that foot surgery,

No, that part is good

Lockback
Sep 3, 2006

All days are nights to see till I see thee; and nights bright days when dreams do show me thee.

kingcobweb posted:

What I've heard (from a freedarko essayist, maybe other people too) is that the labor dispute only bubbled over because Jordan retired. If he had kept the golden age of Jordan going, there was enough money coming in that ownership wouldn't be as cutthroat and lock the players out.

Jordan didn't officially retire until after the lockout, and while I think it was pretty much a done deal the lockout came first. I remember when the season was so late starting there was some hope that might make Jordan more interested in coming back but his finger was all messed up anyway.

anakha posted:

Pippen in 98 was a spiteful moron who pulled the 'Imma heal on company time' stunt with that foot surgery, which forced Jordan and an already-aging Bulls rotation to log more minutes to stay competitive.

Nah, Pippen was on one of the worst deals in NBA history (for a player) and at that time negotiating a long contract like that was not uncommon like it is today. Krause gets poo poo for that but I can't imagine why he'd care about giving Pippen more money. That was 100% on Reinsdorf.

G-Hawk
Dec 15, 2003

Lockback posted:

Houston was only up that much because they were shooting like 55% from 3, once that dried up their offense looked like their lineup should look. Houston doesn't get anything by tanking, their lottery odds are as good as they can get for a top 4 pick, outside that OKC gets the pick. Houston just sucks.

the tanking thing was somewhat in jest, i don't think the players literally started missing on purpose or anything. The extent to which they're tanking is on the level of they traded away their good players and now have maybe 5 legitimate nba players and a bunch of fringe randos.

That's true on the top 4 although its important Houston stays within that bottom 4 or their odds begin decreasing in the lotto. (27-30 is 52% they keep their pick, 26 is 45%, 25 is 37%) Right now Houston is 3 games behind Washington so that isn't guaranteed or anything. Prior to their 20 game losing streak the odds Houston would get a top 4 pick was like 10%. So they've tanked as far as they can tank but they need to stay there. In short I hope they keep losing every game and win the coin flip

Bip Roberts
Mar 29, 2005
Keep in mind that Jordan had a history of quitting and being soft.

Declan MacManus
Sep 1, 2011

damn i'm really in this bitch

how old would michael jordan have to be before you felt that you could beat him 1-on-1

Punkin Spunkin
Jan 1, 2010

MourningView posted:

Jordan also would have missed most of that next season anyway, before he actually retired he almost hacked off the tip of one finger with a cigar cutter.
woah

quote:

Many blame former Bulls general manager Jerry Krause for pushing Michael Jordan into retirement in 1998 and breaking up a team that won three straight championships.

However, it's worth noting that Jordan may not have been able to play most of the 1999 lockout-shortened season because of a severed tendon in his finger he suffered attempting to cut a cigar at a casino in the Bahamas.

ESPN's Zach Lowe reminded many of the long-forgotten tidbit in his recent profile of Toni Kukoc.

Not much of how this happened is known. A Page Six report from 2000 says the incident happened when Jordan was "fooling around" with a cigar cutter. Jordan attributed his injury to the cigar cutter being "cheap" and breaking as he pressed down on it in an interview with the Chicago-Sun Times in 2000.

What is clear is that Jordan suffered serious damage to his hand. What was originally described as an injury that would take six weeks to heal ultimately left Jordan with nerve damage in his hand. He told the Sun-Times he was no longer able to palm a basketball and underwent a second surgery to repair the injury.

"When Hefferon did the surgery, he saw all the ligament damage I already had from dislocating my finger so many times," Jordan explained. "So the only thing he could do was reattach the tendon. He said, 'You'll lose some mobility, there is nothing I can do."'

"I can still shoot," Jordan continued. "But I can't grip the ball completely. I have a tough time picking it up off the dribble like I used to."

I just decided THIS is the reason he retired, none of that other poo poo. It also makes it kinda funnier cuz "career ending cigar cutter injury" is some stupid jordan poo poo for sure.

The Maestro
Feb 21, 2006

Declan MacManus posted:

how old would michael jordan have to be before you felt that you could beat him 1-on-1

4

Bip Roberts
Mar 29, 2005
Building a time machine to mercilessly bully toddler Jordan is praxis

Punkin Spunkin
Jan 1, 2010

Declan MacManus posted:

how old would michael jordan have to be before you felt that you could beat him 1-on-1
honestlyyyyyy
102
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HWzspQIrVY8

Maybe I could beat 90 or 95 year old jordan

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big boi
Jun 11, 2007


Lol technically correct

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