UK Cunt Thread: bread and coffee wankers

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > UK Cunt Thread: bread and coffee wankers

«‹›4201 »

NotJustANumber99: Feb 15, 2012; somehow that last av was even worse than your posting

aren't aldi doing one again?

# ? Apr 25, 2021 23:53

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 26, 2024 21:47

NotJustANumber99: Feb 15, 2012; somehow that last av was even worse than your posting

like pizzas dont even take long in the oven, why do you need it so quick? and how often do you even do pizza?

as usual its up to me to be the voice of reason. You dont need one.

# ? Apr 25, 2021 23:55

Bobby Deluxe: May 9, 2004

Dogatron posted:

my wife is lovely and I will take her bullet

take what little joy remains in her day why dont you

# ? Apr 26, 2021 03:36

kecske: Feb 28, 2011; it's round, like always

my nighttime noise anecdote is as follows:

a guy from the assisted living unit round the back of my apartment block would come out into the street and do the biggest horror movie screams at night. you'd hear the most blood curdling shriek at like 3am and when you went to look out the window this guy was just standing there at the end of the drive playing on his phone and smoking, occasionally screaming some more.

# ? Apr 26, 2021 06:33

Gasmask: Apr 27, 2003; And if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee

Meat Wagon posted:

Goonmeet outside of Dogatron's house. Bring weed and warm up your vocal chords, we're having a singsong. No southerners unless you can do a good northern accent thanks

Why aye pet I�m awa doom the grove to have a natter wi PJ n Duncan

# ? Apr 26, 2021 07:24

Gasmask: Apr 27, 2003; And if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee

How was that

# ? Apr 26, 2021 07:24

Vitamins: May 1, 2012

hello how are you

# ? Apr 26, 2021 07:28

Gasmask: Apr 27, 2003; And if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee

Vitamins posted:

hello how are you

Not too bad. For a Monday lol.

How r u friend

# ? Apr 26, 2021 07:42

kecske: Feb 28, 2011; it's round, like always

I have a job interview on wednesday but I'm too ~~fat~~ buff for all my shirts

# ? Apr 26, 2021 07:43

kecske: Feb 28, 2011; it's round, like always

also it's over zoom so is it ok to just dress up my upper body and leave the lower half in gaudy hawaiian shorts

# ? Apr 26, 2021 07:45

fridge corn: Apr 2, 2003; NO MERCY, ONLY PAIN

Solefald posted:

Lol

# ? Apr 26, 2021 08:07

Party Boat: Nov 1, 2007; where did that other dog come from

who is he

If the neighbours are being a bit noisy around my son's bedtime I close the window and put some rain noises on. Little kids are basically dead to the world when they're asleep so once he's settled I can open the window again

Then I call for a SWAT team to raid them because their cat keeps pooing in my garden :mad:

# ? Apr 26, 2021 08:25

Dysgenesis: Jul 12, 2012; HAVE AT THEE!

I have decided to work from home today.

# ? Apr 26, 2021 08:45

freelop: Apr 28, 2013; Where we're going, we won't need fries to see

If your neighbours are being loud outside do what I do and grumble quietly to yourself thinking of the things you would say to them but won't because that would require confrontation

# ? Apr 26, 2021 09:11

goatface: Dec 5, 2007; I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.; Grimey Drawer

kecske posted:

my nighttime noise anecdote is as follows:

a guy from the assisted living unit round the back of my apartment block would come out into the street and do the biggest horror movie screams at night. you'd hear the most blood curdling shriek at like 3am and when you went to look out the window this guy was just standing there at the end of the drive playing on his phone and smoking, occasionally screaming some more.

Primal screaming therapy is very effective for some people.

# ? Apr 26, 2021 09:13

Gasmask: Apr 27, 2003; And if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee

goatface posted:

Primal screaming therapy is very effective for some people.

bobby gillespie has done alright out of it

# ? Apr 26, 2021 09:21

Jose: Jul 24, 2007; Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

What drama to wake up hungover to

# ? Apr 26, 2021 09:23

Party Boat: Nov 1, 2007; where did that other dog come from

who is he

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOXaBV8mD-I

# ? Apr 26, 2021 09:28

Galewolf: Jan 9, 2007; The human gallbladder is indeed a puzzle!

Lmao I heard the entire last couple of pages in my head like this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0KWxTAhJ5X0

# ? Apr 26, 2021 09:45

captainclaw: Sep 16, 2020

I like to take the rubbish out to the bins in the garden when my neighbours being loud and slam a bin lid or two.
The hard part is finding more rubbish to throw out when he starts his poo poo again.

# ? Apr 26, 2021 09:45

fridge corn: Apr 2, 2003; NO MERCY, ONLY PAIN

Imagine calling the cops on some kids for smoking weed lmao simply incredible

# ? Apr 26, 2021 09:50

Galewolf: Jan 9, 2007; The human gallbladder is indeed a puzzle!

Can I call the police on foxes yelping outside?

# ? Apr 26, 2021 09:54

kecske: Feb 28, 2011; it's round, like always

what did the fox say?

# ? Apr 26, 2021 09:59

oh no computer: May 27, 2003

Party Boat posted:

Then I call for a SWAT team to raid them because their cat keeps pooing in my garden

Does this work?

# ? Apr 26, 2021 10:02

Galewolf: Jan 9, 2007; The human gallbladder is indeed a puzzle!

kecske posted:

what did the fox say?

I believe they are having intercourses of sexual nature.

# ? Apr 26, 2021 10:03

Gasmask: Apr 27, 2003; And if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee

kecske posted:

what did the fox say?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95YdE89nTgI

# ? Apr 26, 2021 10:05

Fingerless Gloves: May 21, 2011; ... aaand also go away and don't come back

Everyone is oval office

# ? Apr 26, 2021 10:13

Ratjaculation: Aug 3, 2007

thought you were dead mate

# ? Apr 26, 2021 10:28

Salisbury Snape: May 26, 2014; While a grain platform can be used for corn, a specialized corn head is ordinarily used instead.

How did you get out from under that patio wtf

# ? Apr 26, 2021 10:29

Jakabite: Jul 31, 2010

CancerCakes posted:

Going to have to go to dogatrons neighbour for a fix

I wouldn�t, I hear one of his neighbours is a grass incapable of civil communication without it calling the filth

# ? Apr 26, 2021 10:33

Fingerless Gloves: May 21, 2011; ... aaand also go away and don't come back

Ratjaculation posted:

thought you were dead mate

I'm not truly alive

I've been extremely busy and moving flat this week so haven't had time to dilly dally about

After I move, I'll probably still not post either because I'm bad at communication, but it's always a pleasure to get a 'Ratty Reply'!

# ? Apr 26, 2021 10:37

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hihEhsdwiIk

# ? Apr 26, 2021 10:44

Ratjaculation: Aug 3, 2007

Fingerless Gloves posted:

I'm not truly alive

I've been extremely busy and moving flat this week so haven't had time to dilly dally about

After I move, I'll probably still not post either because I'm bad at communication, but it's always a pleasure to get a 'Ratty Reply'!

Ive set notifications for when you post, so I'll be waiting

And good luck with the move friend

# ? Apr 26, 2021 10:57

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

# ? Apr 26, 2021 11:08

Fingerless Gloves: May 21, 2011; ... aaand also go away and don't come back

test test

# ? Apr 26, 2021 11:13

captainclaw: Sep 16, 2020

Fingerless Gloves posted:

test test

congrats on 2000 posts. Hopefully they weren't all poo poo

# ? Apr 26, 2021 11:15

Clyde Radcliffe: Oct 19, 2014

kecske posted:

also it's over zoom so is it ok to just dress up my upper body and leave the lower half in gaudy hawaiian shorts

Yes, although this guarantees that someone will knock on your door during the interview, forcing you to get up and reveal your shorts on camera.

I've been interviewing people over the past 2 weeks and quite a few dressed formally, even though the emails we sent out said that it wasn't required for Zoom interviews.

I had one on Friday where I had joined the meeting and was about to start my webcam before realising I was still in pyjamas. At 3 in the afternoon.

# ? Apr 26, 2021 12:36