[UFOs] m'orbs

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Bideo James: Oct 21, 2020; you'll have to ask someone else about the size of her cans

Good Soldier Svejk posted:

You fool, you missed out on nabbing a premium artifact

You'll never make it through the zone with those instincts

probably under the floors of that drat porch bedroom!

# ? May 20, 2021 19:17

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# ? Apr 28, 2024 18:15

Bideo James: Oct 21, 2020; you'll have to ask someone else about the size of her cans

two years later in the same house, same bedroom but the table being moved to where the chair/tv combo was
a huge thunderstorm come through late at night, probably 11pm or so, lasted hours

i was sitting playing Diablo 2, farming pindleskin and got up to give our new puppy some water and get a snack for myself when i heard a loud crack of thunder and an intense light come from my bedroom.

i felt the force of rumble go through the house from where i was in the kitchen in the next room and i could see the window in my bedroom to the tree outside. it was all lit up red, orange, and white. the power went out inside and i was trapped in a moment of neon as these colors faded and then suddenly vanished. the power came back on and i could hear the sound of water rushing into the house.

i turned the corner of the room which had been obfuscated by the open door to find a giant tree limb sticking through the roof, the tip of the battered branch firmly settled on the chair i had been sitting in moments earlier. water pouring through the new hole in the roof. i finally rushed into the room, pulled the chair away from my new roommate and pushed the computer off the table onto a couch nearby away from the water. of course, my mother and sister had finally found me by this point because i was screaming and yelling like i had been murdered. i was frantically getting containers from the garage to help stem the flow of water.

they saw everything painted before them and were so relieved myself and the dog werent hurt.

the next morning i had to pull the top of the tree from the roof, which had been blasted apart by a "lightning strike". I put tarp over the hole and hoped to fix it soon.

a couple weeks later our deaf cat somehow got into the roof and for a few days became my own personal ceiling cat

# ? May 20, 2021 19:27

Bideo James: Oct 21, 2020; you'll have to ask someone else about the size of her cans

i grew up where "the legend of boggy creek" occurred, the land we had was also where the film was made. the swamps hid so many insane things. alligator gars. old highways. bounding hills flooded with the remains of thousands of years of life.

we once brought home a goat from my aunt and uncles farm. built a 15ft tall enclosure next to our barn. it was there for exactly 3 days until it vanished.

# ? May 20, 2021 19:33

Think Less: Dec 29, 2016

Bideo James posted:

i grew up where "the legend of boggy creek" occurred, the land we had was also where the film was made. the swamps hid so many insane things. alligator gars. old highways. bounding hills flooded with the remains of thousands of years of life.

we once brought home a goat from my aunt and uncles farm. built a 15ft tall enclosure next to our barn. it was there for exactly 3 days until it vanished.

Black Phillip returned to the woods

# ? May 20, 2021 19:39

Bideo James: Oct 21, 2020; you'll have to ask someone else about the size of her cans

Think Less posted:

Black Phillip returned to the woods

he was black with white socks, just a lil guy too.

in the late summer of 1999 my step-father called us all out to the garden early in the morning to ask us what happened. all of our watermelons were gone. we had no idea, no one had done anything with the garden but water it the day before. it takes almost half a day to get everything so we would have noticed, or brought the melons inside. after searching nearby we found the tall grass behind a couple of shade trees had been pushed down in a large circle, which was on the other side of a barbed wire fence, past the grass was a large pond we had finally filled. within that circle was every single watermelon, hallowed out, looking like it was scooped out by human hands. some broke in half from looked like tossing/dropping, some with holes perfectly formed. not a huge mess of rinds, almost carefully eaten.

right on the edge of that circle was a pile of poo poo bigger than i had ever seen, an inhuman amount of human like poo poo. we lost a lot of peppers and a few cucumbers as well.

# ? May 20, 2021 19:45

Delta-Wye: Sep 29, 2005

Bideo James posted:

he was black with white socks, just a lil guy too.

in the late summer of 1999 my step-father called us all out to the garden early in the morning to ask us what happened. all of our watermelons were gone. we had no idea, no one had done anything with the garden but water it the day before. it takes almost half a day to get everything so we would have noticed, or brought the melons inside. after searching nearby we found the tall grass behind a couple of shade trees had been pushed down in a large circle, which was on the other side of a barbed wire fence, past the grass was a large pond we had finally filled. within that circle was every single watermelon, hallowed out, looking like it was scooped out by human hands. some broke in half from looked like tossing/dropping, some with holes perfectly formed. not a huge mess of rinds, almost carefully eaten.

right on the edge of that circle was a pile of poo poo bigger than i had ever seen, an inhuman amount of human like poo poo. we lost a lot of peppers and a few cucumbers as well.

ya'll got a hog problem from the sounds of it lol

# ? May 20, 2021 19:47

Log082: Nov 8, 2008

Pooky posted:

I wonder why none of the recent leaks cover what happens when you try to shoot at them. I don't believe for a second that a Navy ship would let itself get surrounded by UAVs without opening fire. And if they really were a "daily occurrence" for the Air Force someone has to have tried to see if the missiles worked.

I've got something for this! also, coincidentally, something for the 'Why is it only the US?" question. Specifically, it's not:

Comandante Oscar Santa Maria Huertas (Ret.), Peruvian Air Force posted:

On April 11, 1980 at 7:15 a.m., a Friday morning, I was stationed at the La Joya Air Force Base in the Arequipa region of Peru. [...]

A chief of service arrived in a van and got out to tell us there was an object that looked like some kind of balloon suspended in the air toward the end of the runway. [Oscar is ordered to destroy a suspected spy balloon]

I then positioned myself for the attack. Zeroing in on the balloon, I reached the necessary distance and shot a burst of sixty-four 30 mm shells, which created a cone-shaped "wall of fire" that would normally obliterate anything in its path. Some of the projectiles deviated from the target, falling to the ground, and others hit it with precision. I thought that the balloon would then be torn open and gases would start pouring out of it. But nothing happened. It seemed as if the huge bullets were absorbed by the balloon, and it wasn't damaged at all. Then suddenly the object began to ascend very rapidly and head away from the base. [...]

My jet flew at a speed of 600 mph (950 km/hr) and the "balloon" remained about 1,600 feet (500 meters) in front of me. [...]

I was in full pursuit of the object, when it came to a sudden stop and forced me to veer to the side. [...] I locked on to the target and was ready to shoot. But just at that moment, the object made another fast climb, evading the attack. [Oscar continues the attack.]

I attempted this same attack maneuver two more times. Each time, I had the object on target when it was stationary. And each time, the object escaped by ascending vertically seconds before I started to fire.

[Oscar tries to get above the object instead, ascending at Mach 1.2]

But to my surprise, the object ascended once again at a high speed and placed itself next to me in parallel formation! This left me without any possibility of attack.

[Running low on fuel, Oscar tries to get in close for a look at his "foe"]

I got as close as about 300 feet (100 meters) from it. I was started to see that the "balloon" was not a balloon at all. It was an object that measured about 35 feet (10 meters) in diameter with a shiny dome on top that was cream-colored, similar to a light bulb cut in half. The bottom was a wider circular base, a silver color, and looked like some kind of metal. It lacked all the typical components of aircraft. [...] At that moment, I realized this was not a spying device but a UFO, something totally unknown. I was almost out of fuel, so I couldn't attack or maneuver my plane, or make a high-speed escape. Suddenly I was afraid. I thought I might be finished.

[Oscar gets the hell out of there, ending the encounter.]

It's interesting that Oscar went in with guns, if only because he didn't have missiles loaded. An Iranian pilot tried missiles, and, well...

General Parviz Jafari (Ret.), Iranian Air Force posted:

[This account takes place on the evening of September 18, 1976

We kept it locked on with radar. The size on the radar scope was comparable to that of a 707 tanker.

At this moment, I thought this was my chance to fire at it. But when it - whatever it was - was close to me, my weapons jammed and my radio were garbled. We got closer, to 25 miles at our twelve o'clock position. All of a sudden it jumped back to 27 miles in an instant. I wondered what it was. I was still seeing that giant, brilliant diamond shape with pulsating, colored lights.

Then I was startled by a round object which came out of the primary object and started coming straight toward me at a high rate of speed, almost as if it were a missile.

[Parviz reasons that if it is a missile, it'll have a heat signature, and the radar for the radar guided missiles is still locked on to the main target anyway. He selects an AIM-9 heat seeker to shoot down the enemy "missile."]

I attempted to fire, and looked at the panel to confirm my selection of the missile. Suddenly, nothing was working. The weapons control panel was out, and I lost all the instruments, and the instruments were fluctuating. At this point, I was even more frightened. I couldn't communicate with the tower, and had to scream to talk to my backseater.

[Parviz takes evasive action. The "missile" turns away and rejoins the main craft, only for another to appear and circle the aircraft. Parviz sights another UFO in the process of returning to base "looking like a thin rectangle with a light at each end and one in the middle," which his backseater also spots, noting "a round dome over it with a dim light inside of it." While circling to land, the original diamond object sends one of its missile/probes/things to land, and Parviz is directed to abort his return to base and examine it. Once again, getting within four or five miles results in communications difficulties. The landed thing has an signal similar to an emergency squawk that is even noted by nearby civilian airliners.]

During this, an American colonel, Olin Mooy, a U.S. Air Force officer with the U.S. Military Advisory and Assistance Group posted in Tehran, sat to my left, and he was turning pages over on his clipboard and taking notes. When I explained how I couldn't fire the missile because my panel went out, even though I tried, he said, "You're lucky you couldn't fire." Afterward, I wanted to talk to him, and ask if this kind of thin had been seen before, and I had other questions. I looked for him, but he was nowhere to be found.

Next they then took me and Lieutenant Damirian to the hospital. We had a round of tests, especially blood tests. When I was about to leave, a doctor came running after me and said, "Don't worry about this, but your blood is not coagulating."

[Parvis goes with others to tour where the bright object landed. There are no signs of landing, and no object is ever found. The emergency squawk like beeping continues for several days. Parvis ends his account with two regrets: That he didn't have a camera to attempt to take a picture, and that he was too excited to attempt to communicate with the UFO.

I've omitted plenty of minor details because these chapters are quite long. I highly recommend UFOs Generals, Pilots, and Government Officials Go On The Record by Leslie Kean. Governments have been seeing things they can't identify for a long time, they just don't want to talk about it - until now, apparently.

# ? May 20, 2021 19:49

space chandeliers: Apr 8, 2008

Are we sharing now?

I was a sophomore in college living in a single family home with 2 other roommates. We had one hallway bathroom with the slim horizontal sliding window placed above the bathtub wall at head height. I went to bed one night then had what is either a dream or an encounter. I remember being aware that I was showering in the hallway bathroom. The light was on and it was dark out. I then looked up at the bathtub window and I saw the outline of a grey's head and its large, deep black eyes. I was frozen at the moment I recognized its nature. Motionless, it only gazed at me. The window was closed. The grey's form was set against the black of night and distorted and hazy from the window's privacy frosting. A shock and then a feeling of terror and realization radiated from my chest and into every muscle in my body, and I perhaps felt that instinct that overcomes some animals and compels them to feign death. I was aware of my body going limp and collapsing, but I don't remember if I felt the impact of my body against the bathtub enamel. I do recall my body ending up completely horizontal near or on the bathtub floor, and I was facing up. I felt the sensation of lifting over my whole body. I was levitating up towards the grey while it remained there outside the window in its motionless gaze towards me. Next thing I remember I am awake in my bed. It was still dark and there was nothing out of the ordinary besides the fear that lingered as I could remember only what I just recalled. Took a while before I could go back to sleep.

I do not recall any further dreams of that nature. I actually want to experience it again because it's kind of exhilarating.

# ? May 20, 2021 19:55

Delta-Wye: Sep 29, 2005

https://www.defense.gov/Newsroom/Transcripts/Transcript/Article/2624549/pentagon-press-secretary-holds-an-off-camera-press-briefing/

quote:

Q: Thank you. CBS recently ...

MR. KIRBY: Jeff, you still there?

Q: ... recently did a -- an episode (inaudible) aliens. Hello?

MR. KIRBY: Jeff, I -- I lost you at "aliens." Actually, I lost -- "aliens" is when you came back in, so you're going to have to -- if you could, repeat your question again.

Q: Sure. 60 Minutes did an episode of unexplained aerial phenomenon. I just wanted to make sure -- well, let's talk brass tacks. Are these things aliens?

(Laughter.)

MR. KIRBY: Jeff, I -- I think you know that -- you know, that we're -- we take reports of incursions, whether they're by known aircraft or unidentified aerial phenomenon, very seriously, and the safety and security of our personnel and of our operations that they remain paramount.

So to protect our people, maintain those operations and safeguard intelligence methods, we're -- we don't publicly discuss the details of these unexplained aerial phenomenon observations or the examinations of the UAP Task Force.

We did establish that task force to gain some knowledge and insight into the nature and origins of these incursions into our training ranges and designated airspaces but -- but we're not going to get into more detail than that.

# ? May 20, 2021 20:05

LRADIKAL: Jun 10, 2001; Fun Shoe

Ball lightning and hallucinations, and I'll call the goon ball lightning stories hallucinations as well.

Has anyone read the Cixen Liu ball lightning story?

# ? May 20, 2021 20:05

Syncopation: Feb 21, 2020

LRADIKAL posted:

Ball lightning and hallucinations, and I'll call the goon ball lightning stories hallucinations as well.

Has anyone read the Cixen Liu ball lightning story?

pls link/give title, i like his short stories

# ? May 20, 2021 20:17

Spergin Morlock: Aug 8, 2009; Fun Shoe

story time:

about 10 years ago I took some ambien and saw some crazy poo poo I couldn't explain. I don't remember what it was, just that it was weird

# ? May 20, 2021 20:53

Gods_Butthole: Aug 9, 2020; Can't post for 8 years!

I think we'll be ok as long as they're not a necrophage species.

# ? May 20, 2021 21:05

Bideo James: Oct 21, 2020; you'll have to ask someone else about the size of her cans

you make fun of me but when i broker the peace deal between the yeti and greyskins youll be thanking me for having these experiences

# ? May 20, 2021 21:07

Gods_Butthole: Aug 9, 2020; Can't post for 8 years!

Delta-Wye posted:

https://www.uaptheory.com/

the breakdown of the puerto rico ufo is pretty fun, they make a reasonable guess for the effects you'd expect from a gravity drive of some kind and then inspect the video for evidence.

This seems pretty compelling, but my "crank poo poo" alarms start going off whenever I see people writing about quantum entanglement effects. Not that I know that they're absolutely wrong, but it's one of those topics people tend to say more about than they have a right to.

However it is compelling that they reasonably theorize a gravitational lensing effect from a gravity drive and then find corresponding visual artifacts in the footage. I'd like to see if those types of distortions and mirage show up in IR camera footage of mundane phenomena.

# ? May 20, 2021 21:22

Delta-Wye: Sep 29, 2005

Gods_Butthole posted:

This seems pretty compelling, but my "crank poo poo" alarms start going off whenever I see people writing about quantum entanglement effects. Not that I know that they're absolutely wrong, but it's one of those topics people tend to say more about than they have a right to.

However it is compelling that they reasonably theorize a gravitational lensing effect from a gravity drive and then find corresponding visual artifacts in the footage. I'd like to see if those types of distortions and mirage show up in IR camera footage of mundane phenomena.

hard to touch this sort of subject without your crank poo poo alarms going off, but making hypothesis and then verifying them with evidence is literally science and i appreciate their approach.

# ? May 20, 2021 21:34

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

Delta-Wye posted:

hard to touch this sort of subject without your crank poo poo alarms going off, but making hypothesis and then verifying them with evidence is literally science and i appreciate their approach.

yes but i also just read the sentence "Consider the elegance of what we just did."

edit:

"This is an important point and we have never seen anyone mention it before. UAPs should generally change their apparent shape as they maneuver."

rl lol

The Saucer Hovers has issued a correction as of 21:44 on May 20, 2021

# ? May 20, 2021 21:41

20 Blunts: Jan 21, 2017

Bideo James posted:

in the summer of 1999 i saw a ball of lightning come into my home.

i was laying on my bed which was also formerly a porch, now enclosed. My bed faced long ways, to my left and right were doors into the house and onto the new porch, beyond that a chair facing a television on a wooden center and beyond that half a pingpong table and a desk chair used for our house computer, i could see out the far window

as i laid off trying to drift off on an extremely hot summer night, i was startled up standing on my bed suddenly as every hair on my body stood up and my heart began to race and in front of me, from the back side of the wooden entertainment center a bright blue and white light emitted from the back of the television and like a ghost a pulsing glowing blue orb began to form in front of it, it slowly traveled from one side of the room, vanishing into the wall. i rushed towards my door to open it into the kitchen and dining room but there was nothing there. i realized then the power was out in the entire house and the microwave beeping to life when suddenly powered again made me flee back to my bed.

i still lay awake at night wondering what that was, but i believe it was either a real ball lightning or swamp gas. i did live in a swamp.

drat thats tuggin'

# ? May 20, 2021 21:43

Gods_Butthole: Aug 9, 2020; Can't post for 8 years!

The Saucer Hovers posted:

yes but i also just read the sentence "Consider the elegance of what we just did."

I think it's generally impossible for anyone to take this stuff seriously without being a little off their nut.

# ? May 20, 2021 21:44

LRADIKAL: Jun 10, 2001; Fun Shoe

Judge Dredd Scott posted:

pls link/give title, i like his short stories

I wasn't sure, but it is in fact called "ball lightning".

# ? May 20, 2021 21:55

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

Gods_Butthole posted:

I think it's generally impossible for anyone to take this stuff seriously without being a little off their nut.

its a good presentation but the author does not get/care they have reinvented the wheel here

# ? May 20, 2021 22:01

Riot Bimbo: Dec 28, 2006

edit: NOPE

Riot Bimbo has issued a correction as of 14:50 on Mar 4, 2022

# ? May 20, 2021 22:33

BeefThief: Aug 8, 2007

Riot Bimbo posted:

99% sure its crazy brain poo poo but I've weirdly been waiting for this to happen and a lot of recent ufo stuff has odd parallels with some deeply personal experiences and events and environment/circumstance defies a lot of explanations. I have never had a taste for ufo stuff outside of a brief time in the late 90s as a kiddo but idk I've been waiting for disclosure personally or broadly for a while now

same, I used to watch Sightings on the Sci Fi channel and then the dude from that show became the newsman on mah teevee but oddly enough since he stopped doing that i stopped caring about little green men (until recently)

# ? May 21, 2021 00:17

Mythical Moderate: Jul 5, 2002; My heart and actions are utterly unclouded. They are all those of 'Justice'.

I saw the Phoenix Lights. I WANT TO BELIEVE

# ? May 21, 2021 00:28

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

all the sightings kidz have the fonz to thank for it

Mythical Moderate posted:

I saw the Phoenix Lights. I WANT TO BELIEVE

drat son trip report

# ? May 21, 2021 00:28

Good Soldier Svejk: Jul 5, 2010

All I want is incontrovertible proof of extra terrestrials I don't think that's too much to ask

# ? May 21, 2021 00:49

Delta-Wye: Sep 29, 2005

Mythical Moderate posted:

I saw the Phoenix Lights. I WANT TO BELIEVE

c'mon goon, don't leave me hanging. what happened? such a weird thing and ive never been able to ask questions of someone who saw it.

# ? May 21, 2021 01:05

my bony fealty: Oct 1, 2008

Marfa lights are one of the weirdest things I've seen, I was expecting to be like "eh whatever ots obviously headlights" but they turned out yo be genuinely strange and I couldn't make heads or tails of what they are

# ? May 21, 2021 01:05

cowboy beepboop: Feb 24, 2001

https://amp.tmz.com/2021/05/20/senator-martin-heinrich-ufo-uap-sightings-technology-too-advanced-humans-aliens/?__twitter_impression=true

this guy is on the Senate Intel Committee

# ? May 21, 2021 01:43

PawParole: Nov 16, 2019

wow. from politco

Only registered members can see post attachments!

# ? May 21, 2021 01:48

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

my stepdads beer posted:

https://amp.tmz.com/2021/05/20/senator-martin-heinrich-ufo-uap-sightings-technology-too-advanced-humans-aliens/?__twitter_impression=true

this guy is on the Senate Intel Committee

thats the calm, confident smirk of a man whos finally getting to do some fun propaganda

# ? May 21, 2021 01:49

PawParole: Nov 16, 2019

PawParole posted:

wow. from politco

this is a UK politics column, so the govt. insiders he talks about are in the British government, and supposedly have prior knowledge of what's in a US govt. report. If the report was going to be a nothingburger, would the UK government be getting briefed on it?

# ? May 21, 2021 01:49

Good Soldier Svejk: Jul 5, 2010

It's coordinated misinformation or it's loving happening

# ? May 21, 2021 01:50

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

Good Soldier Svejk posted:

It's coordinated misinformation

# ? May 21, 2021 01:51

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

god loving drat it if i have to sit through bluebeam

# ? May 21, 2021 01:51

Delta-Wye: Sep 29, 2005

my bony fealty posted:

Marfa lights are one of the weirdest things I've seen, I was expecting to be like "eh whatever ots obviously headlights" but they turned out yo be genuinely strange and I couldn't make heads or tails of what they are

i have somehow never heard of this, or don't remember at least. what did it look like in person? the handful of youtube videos ive found are pretty odd, but its all vhs grainy poo poo

# ? May 21, 2021 01:53

Delta-Wye: Sep 29, 2005

The Saucer Hovers posted:

god loving drat it if i have to sit through bluebeam

its hilarious - alien rollout is making me doubt the reality of cv19 lmao

whats even real :psyduck:

# ? May 21, 2021 01:55

Delta-Wye: Sep 29, 2005

posting is the only thing that is real

# ? May 21, 2021 01:56

Good Soldier Svejk: Jul 5, 2010

The phoenix lights sound loving terrifying

# ? May 21, 2021 02:02

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# ? Apr 28, 2024 18:15

Mythical Moderate: Jul 5, 2002; My heart and actions are utterly unclouded. They are all those of 'Justice'.

My experience was pretty much the same as the guy in video below except I was on the other side of valley in one of Phoenix's suburbs. Given how light polluted Phoenix is, they were easily visible from 20ish miles from downtown Phoenix.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bvKLeaPWPyw

# ? May 21, 2021 02:03

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