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Funky See Funky Do posted:There's a lot of quietly opiate addicted goons huh? kratom is NOT an opiate. it's an opiate analogue and therefore entirely beneficial *suppresses urge to vomit*
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Sep 20, 2021 20:41
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if you dont give a poo poo about anything you can reuse coffee grounds once
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Sep 20, 2021 20:56
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You can get away with crime if you do it real sneaky-like.
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Sep 20, 2021 20:58
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 e: Oops! Sorry I thought this was the useful life hacks thread.
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Sep 20, 2021 21:08
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Outrail posted:
while you're working on your car you should also change your blinker fluid and grease the muffler bearings, people always forget simple maintenance goes a long way
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Sep 20, 2021 21:11
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Gas station coffee is free if you drink it before you get to the register...
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Sep 20, 2021 22:11
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Harry_Potato posted:Gas station coffee is free if you drink it before you get to the register... Everything in gas stations is free if the pockets on your trenchcoat are deep enough.
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Sep 20, 2021 22:14
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Just pay 300 bucks for an escort every now and then. Its cheaper in the long run than an actual girlfriend, wife especially, and you dont have to speak to them or hear them speak after youve nutted and you're done with them
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Sep 20, 2021 22:57
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Oh wait useless? Wrong thread
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Sep 20, 2021 22:59
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if your clothes no longer fit just rip them until they fit
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Sep 20, 2021 23:06
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dr.acula posted:Just pay 300 bucks for an escort every now and then. Its cheaper in the long run than an actual girlfriend, wife especially, and you dont have to speak to them or hear them speak after youve nutted and you're done with them
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Sep 20, 2021 23:21
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numberoneposter posted:or you can marry them and then they cant charge you any more They can even make money for you.
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Sep 20, 2021 23:21
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Staple your balls to a chicken and you can watch them cross the road.
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Sep 20, 2021 23:41
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staple your balls to a chicken to get to the other side
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Sep 20, 2021 23:51
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If you get arrested for making GBS threads in your terrible neighbor's yard, the judge will rule in your favor if you argue you were simply fertilizing the local ecosystem.
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Sep 21, 2021 00:41
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dr.acula posted:Just pay 300 bucks for an escort every now and then. Its cheaper in the long run than an actual girlfriend, wife especially, and you dont have to speak to them or hear them speak after youve nutted and you're done with them Crossposting to the ‘Making friends in your 30s’ thread
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Sep 21, 2021 01:20
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if you're frustrated by high prices and low supply for high-end graphics cards, just close your eyes and imagine playing with it!
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Sep 21, 2021 02:19
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dr.acula posted:Just pay 300 bucks for an escort every now and then. Its cheaper in the long run than an actual girlfriend, wife especially, and you dont have to speak to them or hear them speak after youve nutted and you're done with them Just pay  for an SA account every now and then. Its cheaper in the long run than an actual girlfriend, wife especially, and you dont have to speak to them or hear them speak after youve nutted and you're done with them
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Sep 21, 2021 02:27
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You can read shampoo bottles over and over again while you poo poo if you forget your phone
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Sep 21, 2021 02:31
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When you've become a perfect being of pure kratom, you need only focus your consciousness upon that which you desire until it materializes before you.
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Sep 21, 2021 02:33
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If you have minor aches or pains you can forget about them for a while by punching yourself right in the taint add hard as you can
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Sep 21, 2021 02:43
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Smugworth posted:When you've become a perfect being of pure kratom, you need only focus your consciousness upon that which you desire until it materializes before you. More kratom?
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Sep 21, 2021 03:14
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Tough hard water stains in your kitchen and bathroom? Turn up your cleaning power a notch by adding menstrual blood!
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Sep 21, 2021 04:12
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If you are desperate for sexual release, the internet has a couple of pornographic images you can access.
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Sep 21, 2021 04:24
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***Discord***
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Sep 21, 2021 04:32
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Keep a knife by the toaster to jam down in there when the bread gets stuck.
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Sep 22, 2021 01:10
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Use a decorative pencil case to store your family's poop knife in style
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Sep 22, 2021 01:13
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Fire will kill germs just as well as soap and water if you want to lower your utility bill.
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Sep 22, 2021 03:14
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if you come up with a cool invention you can patent it and make a lot of money, so give that a shot
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Sep 22, 2021 03:43
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:If you like sucking dicks you can get a good paying job at the factory and actually enjoy what you do for a living instead of feeling like you’re just going through the motions until you die. I'm really sorry, but you have to hear this: the dick sucking factory? It's a metaphor. I was skeptical, too, but when I did a meticulous search and could not find a single product or material produced by the dick sucking factory, I had to accept the truth.
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Sep 22, 2021 08:07
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Nah the dick sucking factory is a real place, I knew a guy who had to get up at 4:20AM every day for his job at the dick sucking factory. I hear they make you take two covid tests a day there.
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Sep 22, 2021 08:13
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SidneyIsTheKiller posted:I'm really sorry, but you have to hear this: the dick sucking factory? It's a metaphor. That's because we provide a service. One thing we do produce is smiles.
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Sep 22, 2021 09:01
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SidneyIsTheKiller posted:I'm really sorry, but you have to hear this: the dick sucking factory? It's a metaphor. Oh yeah? Well where the hell have I been going for 8 hours a day to suck dicks for the last 15 years then huh, smart guy? Yeesh 
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Sep 22, 2021 11:42
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You wouldn't know the dick sucking factory, it's in Canada.
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Sep 22, 2021 11:46
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I tried to get a job at the dick sucking factory in New Zealand but all I got was a mouth full of feathers.
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Sep 22, 2021 11:49
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:Oh yeah? Well where the hell have I been going for 8 hours a day to suck dicks for the last 15 years then huh, smart guy? Yeesh Are you joking? Of course we both know where you've been going: my house!
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Sep 22, 2021 12:55
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Stars are made of kratom and if you learn to read the hidden knowledge spelled by their arrangement within the infinite universe while imbibing the sacred plant, you can unlock the secrets of faster than light travel
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Sep 22, 2021 12:58
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Constantly tired? Constantly bitch about it!
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Sep 22, 2021 13:03
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Peggy Edson posted:Constantly tired? Constantly bitch about it! *yawns v loudly for the 300th time today*
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Sep 22, 2021 13:08
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SidneyIsTheKiller posted:Are you joking? Of course we both know where you've been going: my house! drat, you’ve really pulled the wool over my eyes! Can I have a raise?
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Sep 22, 2021 14:50
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