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Ziv Zulander
Mar 24, 2017

ZZ for short


Martman posted:

Random aside, but I have a Mexican friend who told me about Lucas-brand candy chili powder that is similar to tajin. Apparently it was super popular with lots of Mexican kids, except... it somehow turned out to be made with dangerous amounts of lead, so you can't find it anymore since the early 2000s or so. The wacky part is that lots of people still apparently miss it because somehow the lead helped give it some perfect kick and it tasted way better than safe alternatives.

Lead is sweet. The ancient romans used to mix it into their wine, and there’s a reason children like eating lead paint chips

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Martman
Nov 20, 2006

Yeah but you'd think people would be able to come up with something better! Pretty dumb of humans to evolve ourselves into liking the taste of poison

Ziv Zulander
Mar 24, 2017

ZZ for short


Martman posted:

Yeah but you'd think people would be able to come up with something better! Pretty dumb of humans to evolve ourselves into liking the taste of poison

If you’ve got 30 minutes to burn then here’s a good video about people selling toxic wine

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qhN-o2ame-4

AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993
posted these in the AFP thread but



This is all one hot dog restaurant:













and some google translated reviews:

quote:

4 stars
Look, I found the hot dog too full of ingredients, including mashed potatoes, which, to my taste, don't match. Cold bread also compromises the product. There are definitely tastier hot dogs in Campinas. One thing must be highlighted: the good service of the waitress and the friendliness of the owner made me add another star. But for those who like hot mashed potatoes, it's worth it. A detail: they do not work with any type of alcoholic beverage.

quote:

1 star
Did not like ! very simple hot dog
Just bread with sausage and vinaigrette?

There was no potato straw maize peas etcs

Response from the owner
Read the beautiful menu!
Hard and h......!!!
Ask for the simplest $ and want to take the full $$$?????
Who didn't like it was Me!
But... let's keep it that way, you away and me too!
Hugs and a lot of health!
(Original text)
Leia o Cardapio lindo!
Duro eh f.....!!!
Pede o mais simples $ e quer levar o completo $$$?????
Quem nao gostou foi Eu!
Mas... vamos mantendo assim, vc longe e eu tbem!
Abraços e muita saude!

included the original owner's response because i dont think it auto translated well

Stink Terios
Oct 17, 2012


Aardvark! posted:

included the original owner's response because i dont think it auto translated well

Here's a better translation:

quote:

Read the menu, hon!
Broke people suc*!!
You order the cheapest item and expect to get the most expensive one????
I'm the one not liking your attitude!
Anyway, let's keep it at that. Stay away from me, and I'll stay away from you!
Have a nice day, and stay healthy!

Owner's mad salty.


Also what's up with the review that dissed the mash potatos, no way a brazilian wrote that.

crazy eyes mustafa
Nov 30, 2014
Yes I would like one catupiry lasagna hot dog with mashed potatoes and a spoon, and don't skimp on the olives!

Sarah Cenia
Apr 2, 2008

Laying in the forest, by the water
Underneath these ferns
You'll never find me

Bonus:

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010

I swear I can hear this plate of food telling me to go gently caress myself

Wizchine
Sep 17, 2007

Television is the retina
of the mind's eye.

That poor omelet was gut-shot.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag
I’ll take the uh, toothpaste omelette please, extra red glop

ilovebeersooomuch
May 23, 2014




*removes spectacles*
Ah yes, the jelly-stick sandwich, replete with unidentifyable white condiment.

Smugworth
Apr 18, 2003


Is this just a catfish po'boy on a hamburger bun?

madeintaipei
Jul 13, 2012

Smugworth posted:

Is this just a catfish po'boy on a hamburger bun?

Butterfly fillet of dip-dog.

Harrow
Jun 30, 2012

There's a place I know in Madison that does a fish sandwich kinda like that. Like the fish equivalent of those huge pork tenderloin sandwiches from Indiana, hamburger-sized bun with a giant piece of fried fish

bagual
Oct 29, 2010

inconspicuous
pineapple chicken burger

Fartington Butts
Jan 21, 2007


bagual posted:

pineapple chicken burger



Needs some teriyaki sauce or somesuch and I wouldn't kick it out of bed for eating crackers.

Zazz Razzamatazz
Apr 19, 2016

by sebmojo

DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

I’ll take the uh, toothpaste omelette please, extra red glop

I'd also like my toast to be black on one side and raw on the other please.

Lascivious Sloth
Apr 26, 2008

by sebmojo

bagual posted:

pineapple chicken burger



This would be great with one more slice of pineapple and sauce to balance it out.

crazy eyes mustafa
Nov 30, 2014
Toast that bun, too!

frytechnician
Jan 8, 2004

Happy to see me?

From way back, but I particularly enjoy this one as it's the first time (without drugs) I've seen a burger howling.

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010

Lascivious Sloth posted:

This would be great with one more slice of pineapple and sauce to balance it out.

As yes, nothing like a mouthful of white bread soaked in pineapple juice

Soul Dentist
Mar 17, 2009

Devils Affricate posted:

As yes, nothing like a mouthful of white bread soaked in pineapple juice

Let that burger sit in a plastic bag in the tank of a prison toilet for a couple weeks and you got yourself some good wine

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010

Soul Dentist posted:

Let that burger sit in a plastic bag in the tank of a prison toilet for a couple weeks and you got yourself some good wine

At least in prison they usually have the decency to filter it with a sock

Soul Dentist
Mar 17, 2009
Yeah so you can get the burger back out and chow down

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


https://twitter.com/StrangeCoisas/status/1448388333034475532

Lascivious Sloth
Apr 26, 2008

by sebmojo

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!
Hey did you know that the Hot Dog Council has a Youtube channel?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T69HDek6a3k

ilovebeersooomuch
May 23, 2014



Bonzo posted:

Hey did you know that the Hot Dog Council has a Youtube channel?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T69HDek6a3k

The hot dog council is pretty goddam self righteous they can go gently caress themselves I'll eat a hot dog any way I want

*slathers corn and mayo*

AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993


ilovebeersooomuch
May 23, 2014




Come the gently caress on

knuthgrush
Jun 25, 2008

Be brave; clench fists.

ilovebeersooomuch posted:

Come the gently caress on

yeah i audibly said "why is the sauce on the outside?" and there's nobody in the room with me. :(

ilovebeersooomuch
May 23, 2014



knuthgrush posted:

yeah i audibly said "why is the sauce on the outside?" and there's nobody in the room with me. :(

I was with you in spirit

crazy eyes mustafa
Nov 30, 2014
I personally can't wait to pick that up with my hands

knuthgrush
Jun 25, 2008

Be brave; clench fists.

i was distracted by the sauce. what are the actual contents? is that like pate and corn? peanut butter and corn? liverwurst (and corn)?

ilovebeersooomuch
May 23, 2014



knuthgrush posted:

i was distracted by the sauce. what are the actual contents? is that like pate and corn? peanut butter and corn? liverwurst (and corn)?

I couldn't figure it out, looks like refried beans and corn with shredded cheese and <brown> sauce

It looks like the djinni granting a wish "Oh ho, you want some sandwiches, well, now you get all the sandwiches you want HOHOHOHO!" *this loving thing appears*

smellmycheese
Feb 1, 2016

https://twitter.com/FoodInsider/status/1450145366003920905

ilovebeersooomuch
May 23, 2014



that doesn't look like something I would want to eat even though that list of ingredients is not rediculous - but the quanities are, which makes it look loving awful. I could do without the cheetos too
Las Vegas, of course it is

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

if it’s meant for, like, a whole group of friends to split apart among themselves, it’d be kind of nifty in a ludicrously indulgent sort of way

but I have a feeling that’s one of those single-person food-as-timed-endurance-challenges dishes, and my psyche and my gut both whimper in dread at the notion

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost
why not just go into the restaurant and pay them $200 to throw a bunch of ingredients into the garbage

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Gromit
Aug 15, 2000

I am an oppressed White Male, Asian women wont serve me! Save me Campbell Newman!!!!!!!

SatansOnion posted:

if it’s meant for, like, a whole group of friends to split apart among themselves, it’d be kind of nifty in a ludicrously indulgent sort of way

but I have a feeling that’s one of those single-person food-as-timed-endurance-challenges dishes, and my psyche and my gut both whimper in dread at the notion

How the hell would you share that with others without it turning into a disgusting pile of slop? Might as well serve it in a bucket (with the eggs on top!)

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