r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

Blastedhellscape: Jan 1, 2008

olylifter posted:

any chance you can diagram this cause I'm twisting my brain in knots trying to figure out what this must have looked like. chalk that up to a failure of imagination on my part

I pictured it as the guy skewering the steak with his knife, holding it up and chomping into it like a cartoon viking. My brother actually ate meat like that a lot of the time when we were growing up, but he at least had the good sense to turn his caveman habits off in public restaurants.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 03:21

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# ? May 30, 2024 16:36

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

AITA for refusing to take in my sister's baby after I took in her daughter?

quote:

Seven years ago I(35f) adopted my niece(9) from my sister(26). My parents have health issues and could not take her in and so I took on the responsibility.

I love my niece and I will never ever blame her for my sister's mistakes, but it unfortunately uprooted my life. It caused a significant side track in my career and I've had to turn down better job offers even because they wouldn't allow me to stay close enough to home. My parents love my niece, but cannot take on the responsibility of caring for her so I don't want to separate them.

I had never planned to have children. I even had a boyfriend before I took in my niece, but he also did not want to have children, and we made the decision to part when I took her in.

We have never hid from my niece who her biological mother is, and even though the first few years of her life were hard, three's years ago my sister started being in our lives again. She told me that she wishes for me to keep raising my niece because I have the better job, and can afford it. My sister only has her ged, and can hardly afford to keep herself afloat. She usually lives with her temporary boyfriends so she doesn't have to worry about paying for her own place.

My sister acts like a aunt to her daughter, not like a mother, and my niece still loves her mother greatly. This past holiday, we were at my parents to open presents and my sister gave my niece a present to open. It was a shirt that said "I'm going to be big sister!" on it. We weren't sure what this meant but my sister informed us that she was pregnant, and that she would not be able to keep it and she was once again expecting me to take in the baby.

My niece was so excited at the news and my parents were happy to hear they were getting another grandchild, but I was just floored. I burst into tears immediately and just walked out. My sister came in to talk to me and I told her that I wouldn't be able to take in the baby. I don't want a new baby. I love my niece, but raising her is enough responsibility already.

My sister told me I would be wrong not to take in my nieces brother. She didn't mean to get pregnant, apparently she was on birth control, and she doesn't know who the father is. My parents couldn't take on a baby either so it's up to me. My sister told me I should feel "blessed" but I don't.

When I told my parents and niece they were all very upset, my niece especially. I don't know what to do, but I can't take in another baby. I know it is my nieces sibling and my sisters child but it would completely ruin my life.

My parents and sister are trying to get me to change my mind about this. AITA?

# ? Jan 2, 2022 04:43

Dramatika: Aug 1, 2002; THE BANK IS OPEN

Mx. posted:

AITA for refusing to take in my sister's baby after I took in her daughter?

Give me your career (so you can raise my children)

# ? Jan 2, 2022 04:48

Dazerbeams: Jul 8, 2009

Mx. posted:

AITA for refusing to take in my sister's baby after I took in her daughter?

This is unwinnable. Even the niece is going to put pressure on OP simply because she's a child and can't fathom the responsibility of taking on a new baby and will only know that her brother isn't wanted. Maybe as an adult she'll realize how horrible this situation is, but gently caress.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 05:06

Verdugo: Jan 5, 2009; Lipstick Apathy

lumpentroll posted:

AITA for my reaction to my fiance Christmas gift?

Like what's the point of even having an anonymous account to mention the story? Its so specific that even if the names are changed or the people involved will obviously know that it's about them. I mean how many biracial couples are fighting over the man bought the black woman an ape nft?

# ? Jan 2, 2022 05:07

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Dazerbeams posted:

This is unwinnable. Even the niece is going to put pressure on OP simply because she's a child and can't fathom the responsibility of taking on a new baby and will only know that her brother isn't wanted. Maybe as an adult she'll realize how horrible this situation is, but gently caress.

Move away with your daughter. Just make the decision, do not take the baby, leave. Niece will hate you, possibly forever, but there is no other viable option and what she should have done in the first place. The boyfriend who left her probably realized she was going to be used by her family forever in addition to not wanting kids.

Verdugo posted:

Like what's the point of even having an anonymous account to mention the story? Its so specific that even if the names are changed or the people involved will obviously know that it's about them. I mean how many biracial couples are fighting over the man bought the black woman an ape nft?

Its a made up story based on a tweet, dont worry about it.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 05:12

QuarkJets: Sep 8, 2008

Quackles posted:

How on earth can they all afford so many houses?

Wealth begets wealth

# ? Jan 2, 2022 06:01

Zulily Zoetrope: Jun 1, 2011; Muldoon

BIG FLUFFY DOG posted:

Wow that�s such a good own. It�s like I�m at the Algonquin round table.

It's a pretty tepid slam; her real crime was upstaging a rich old white man, a demographic even more fragile than slobby boyfriends, while being a young woman with dyed hair.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 06:54

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

AITA for how I reacted after I discovered my husband left our daughter in dirty diaper for 4hrs?

quote:

My husband (35m) and I (32m) been married for 3 years. We have a toddler and an infant.

The problem is that he's helpless, there I said it. He doesn't have a job, spends his entire day on his phone or watching tv or playing on his latest console (that I bought him with my money) or just 'chilling' on the couch eating "couch snacks". He doesn't cook (doesn't know how) And when I ask if he could help tidy up the house he be like "why? We havin' guests over?". he does help but it's the absolute bare minimum. For example he'd unload the dishwasher or take the trash out then go back to the couch while I cook, clean, get up with the baby. I tried taming/motivating him by offering him favorite snaks or drinks or buy something nice to get him to start helping more but it's always the couch he goes back to.

Then if I dare criticize his behavior he'd go silent for long time (2-3weeks) I hate it. I also suggested jobs for him so he could help since I pay for everything. he'd get excited then misses the job interview every.single.time!!!

It all came to head days ago when I went home and found that our 2 year old (not potty trained) was left in dirty diaper for 4hrs even though her dad was home but he was right there on the couch snoozing !/!. When he said he planned to change the diaper but until after his nap it felt like a switch that got turned inside me. I. ROYALLY. LOST. IT on him. First I yelled at him to get up and he did then I did the following:

A. Had him clean up everything: the floor, the surfaces, the messy rooms, the messy bathroom, fix the broken lamps, do the dishes, take the trash out, pick up the toys and food leftovers all over the place then vaccum.

B. I moved the couch to the basement, confiscated his console, cancelled channel subscribtions, turned wifi off and changed the password and took his "couch snacks".

He watched while I did all that and in dismay he waved with the duster in his hand yelling this is abuse and he won't take it. I told him he had no right to talk about abuse after leaving our daughter in her dirty diaper while he..naped. He completed all tasks I gave him but still argued that wasn't "cool" that I thought it was okay to punish him and treat him like a dog. I refused to discuss it and said this is how it's gonna be from now on. he then went to stay with a friend, turned his location off and sent a text guilting me for how I treated him over a simple mistake.

AITA.

EDIT/Info: he suffered from depression and handful of mental health problems throughout his 20s if this is relevent. Look I don't want to discredit mental health issues and their massive impact on the individual but...

# ? Jan 2, 2022 06:59

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

Mx. posted:

AITA for how I reacted after I discovered my husband left our daughter in dirty diaper for 4hrs?

what's that quote from earlier in the thread?

"I'm not at fault for my mental illness but I am responsible for my actions as a result"

sounds like the husband knows exactly what he is doing and is perfectly happy to be cared for by his wife-mother.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 07:04

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Mx. posted:

AITA for refusing to take in my sister's baby after I took in her daughter?

Abort.

Not the baby, but your trash sister and family.

There is no good way out for that poor woman.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 07:05

Zulily Zoetrope: Jun 1, 2011; Muldoon

I have never seen the phrase "don't treat me like a child/dog" uttered by a person who has done anything to warrant being treated like an adult.

I'm aware there's plenty of scenarios where it is a valid complaint, but it only ever seems to be said by manchildren.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 07:10

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

AITA for having my dog have the same name as my cousins daughter?

quote:

So for some context, i (23F) have a golden retriever for the last two years. Her name is Isabella, or bella for short. I've never been close to my cousin, but as of recently she's announced the birth of her baby girl who is coincidentally named isabella, "or bella for short". My cousin knows my dogs name as she has been around her a few times at family gatherings, but however after she baby was born she told me that i needed to change my dogs name. i asked why and she said that it wasn't okay for me to have named my dog after her daughter. i reminded her multiple times that i named my dog two years before she even had her daughter. she also said that it was my fault for wasting the name on "that mutt"

My mom is on my side because she sees where i'm coming from, how ever my cousin is spreading rumours in my family, that i stole the name. which isn't even possible? she stole my dogs name.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 07:13

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Mx. posted:

AITA for how I reacted after I discovered my husband left our daughter in dirty diaper for 4hrs?

These kids

# ? Jan 2, 2022 07:15

Bargearse: Nov 27, 2006; 🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

I have never seen the phrase "don't treat me like a child/dog" uttered by a person who has done anything to warrant being treated like an adult.

I'm aware there's plenty of scenarios where it is a valid complaint, but it only ever seems to be said by manchildren.

I see you�ve never met my parents.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 07:20

rain dogs: Apr 19, 2020

Mx. posted:

AITA for how I reacted after I discovered my husband left our daughter in dirty diaper for 4hrs?

wow what a manch*ld

# ? Jan 2, 2022 07:39

endlessmonotony: Nov 4, 2009; by Fritz the Horse

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

I have never seen the phrase "don't treat me like a child/dog" uttered by a person who has done anything to warrant being treated like an adult.

I'm aware there's plenty of scenarios where it is a valid complaint, but it only ever seems to be said by manchildren.

Now that I think about it I've only heard it said to me when I was saying something to the tune of "I get you're unreliable but could you at least stop lying?".

# ? Jan 2, 2022 07:54

tinytort: Jun 10, 2013; Super healthy, super cheap

Cobalt-60 posted:

I admit there's something primally satisfying about grilling a steak, letting it cool just enough, then tearing it apart with your hands and teeth like you just discovered fire. AT HOME. No idea how you'd eat pasta with your hands; that just sounds hard to do and gross.

Imagine a baby being given spaghetti for the first time. Except instead of a cute baby who is genuinely trying their best, it's a disgusting slob of an adult who's fully aware of how to use silverware and how to behave in public. Because that's what I pictured.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 09:46

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

AITA for snapping at a friend because her idea of masculinity is ridiculous?

quote:

I recently went out with a friend for lunch, and we were discussing our home lives as you do. She was complaing that her partner is really messy and he never even does basic stuff around the house like putting his laundry in the hamper and asked is my hubby was the same. She's works part time and her partner full time for reference.

Hubby and I own a business together, though I am very much the key person in our business. The way we have our work/home life organized is I do 80% of the work in the business and pull super long hours and so he does 80% of the work in the home. I asked if she could do a percentage breakdown with her partner to see if he could see how much work being in charge of the home was.

She was a bit confused and so I explained that it's been months since I've done any laundry, I cook maybe once a week, but I do groceries and dishes, and my hubby does the school runs with the kids etc, and he spends around the same amount of time doing these home orientated tasks that I work extra in the business so that's how we keep things fair.

We both get a whole day off once a week when nothing is expected of us and having everything broken down has really helped us not become resentful of each other and that we appreciate the work we both do to run both our home and our business. We literally sat down and said ok, kid drop offs and pick ups take an hour each day, laundry takes 45 minutes, dishes take 20 minutes, grocery shopping takes an hour etc, then broke down the business stuff the same way and arranged our schedules so even though it's not 50% each of home/business stuff, it's 50% overall if that makes sense. I excell at work stuff, he's way better at home stuff so it works for us.

She got really quiet and asked if I was sure my partner wasn't gay. I laughed and told her that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

Probably not the best reaction. She said she wasn't trying to be mean but that I was emasculating my partner and chances are he was scared to come out of the closet because his family is religious.

I told her that my partner isn't scared of having an ambitious and strong wife, and I'd rather have a partner act like a partner than an extra child to tend to. She got really teary and said I didn't have to be mean. Admittedly I was upset as I was pretty annoyed that she thought of my husband's contribution to our lives as less masculine or that he's gay for doing housework. I think of him as extremely masculine and he's very secure in himself.

We left and she sent me a message later saying that just because she chooses to live differently than me doesn't make her any less than. I replied that I was actually encouraging her to make her partner see the value of her work but she's still very angry at me and isn't talking to me.

AITA?

"why are u being so mean to me, using a slur like manch*ld when i just said u were emasculating ur partner into being gay"

# ? Jan 2, 2022 10:30

Evil Willow: Apr 26, 2007; Bored now...

AITA for not paying for my food when my boyfriend ate it?

quote:

Hi. Yesterday, as you all know was New Year. My boyfriend Alan (M26), a couple mutual friends and I (F26) went for out for dinner to celebrate at a restaurant. Just for extra information, I'm a little on the heavier side. I'm on diet currently trying to lose the extra lbs, and Alan knows.

At dinner, I ordered something called the "Crispy lemon chicken with creamy parmesan spaghetti". It looked so amazing, and I decided to give myself a treat after eating healthy for a while. Alan gave me a weird look when I ordered it, and said loudly to all my friends "Woah, no more diet?" which was kinda embarassing. Alan ordered a mushroom cauliflower rice with sweet peas.

The food came in about 20 minutes time, and to my shock, Alan immediately started digging into my spaghetti. I said "Hey, that's my food" and he laughed "You can have mine, it looks nice." I argued that I didn't order that (I sadly HATE cauliflower rice with a passion) but he said that I didn't need the extra calories. I would've grabbed back my food but I didn't want to embarass myself in front of everyone, so I angrily relented.

Later when we were footing the bill (we were all supposed to pay for our own meals), Alan asked me for $14 to cover my food (which was the cost of the spaghetti). I said that I wouldn't pay because I didn't get to eat it. He asked for $10 (price of the cauliflower rice), but I still disagreed, because I didn't order it. He got angry and said that I was acting like a golddigger. He said that I was an rear end in a top hat.

My friends think he shouldn't have been rude to me, but that I should've paid for the cauliflower rice since I ate it. It's petty, but he's been bitching about me to people, so AITA?

EDIT: For people who didn't see my comments, yes I did dump him after dinner. He ignored the message and asked "Please Venmo me the money".

# ? Jan 2, 2022 10:40

Butter Activities: May 4, 2018

Mx. posted:

AITA for snapping at a friend because her idea of masculinity is ridiculous?

"why are u being so mean to me, using a slur like manch*ld when i just said u were emasculating ur partner into being gay"

Sorry ladies either you�re gonna have a manchild husband or be a beard.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 10:44

Zulily Zoetrope: Jun 1, 2011; Muldoon

Blue Moonlight posted:

She�ll wish she had inspired Gay Sloth.

you rang?

# ? Jan 2, 2022 12:44

Dr. Stab: Sep 12, 2010; 👨🏻‍⚕️🩺🔪🙀😱🙀

Having a loving relationship with your wife based on mutual respect is extremely gay. All straight guys hate their wives and just dream about hanging out with their bros and maybe getting into a little horseplay and maybe, by accident, their dicks touch and they lock eyes for a moment.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 13:20

Sir Sidney Poitier: Aug 14, 2006; My favourite actor

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for not paying for my food when my boyfriend ate it?

AITA for stabbing my boyfriend when he told me I don't need the calories of the food I ordered, ate it himself, then tried to charge me for it? Answer: NTA

Checked the comments on this one, she did break up with him after.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 14:38

DrManiac: Feb 29, 2012

Mx. posted:

AITA for refusing to take in my sister's baby after I took in her daughter?

Lol that�s why you gotta nip that poo poo in the bud. The sister is never going to stop if she can have her cake and eat it too.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:00

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Sir Sidney Poitier posted:

AITA for stabbing my boyfriend when he told me I don't need the calories of the food I ordered, ate it himself, then tried to charge me for it? Answer: NTA

Checked the comments on this one, she did break up with him after.

Jury and relationship nullification

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:02

Verdugo: Jan 5, 2009; Lipstick Apathy

Mx. posted:

AITA for how I reacted after I discovered my husband left our daughter in dirty diaper for 4hrs?

Throw out the couch, husband, and snacks. Not necessarily in that order.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:21

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

Verdugo posted:

Throw out the couch, husband, and snacks. Not necessarily in that order.

All of them at once.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:32

therattle: Jul 24, 2007; Soiled Meat

Ghost Leviathan posted:

All of them at once.

Husband first, then shower him with snacks, then drop the couch on him. Then set it alight.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:34

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

What the hell did the snacks do?

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:36

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Those snacks were enablers

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:47

SiKboy: Oct 28, 2007; Oh no!😱

Kill husband, kiss sofa, marry snacks.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:47

therattle: Jul 24, 2007; Soiled Meat

Pope Corky the IX posted:

What the hell did the snacks do?

The snacks were a symbol of his mooching. I�m surprised you haven�t got an awful family story involving snacks.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:54

Benagain: Oct 10, 2007; Can you see that I am serious?; Fun Shoe

I was always pissed off by those useless husband/father stories but now that I have a daughter I just....how can you not do the absolute minimum? How can you not want to do more?

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:57

big shtick energy: May 27, 2004

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for wearing a bridesmaid dress when I was not a bridesmaid?

The dress was in the thrift shop because a bridesmaid got kicked out of the wedding, the OP wearing it reminded everyone of that person being kicked out.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 15:58

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Benagain posted:

I was always pissed off by those useless husband/father stories but now that I have a daughter I just....how can you not do the absolute minimum? How can you not want to do more?

And how are there so many people willing to put up with that poo poo?

# ? Jan 2, 2022 16:08

greazeball: Feb 4, 2003

I am really interested to know people's definition of "the perfect partner" except for that one thing. None of the people in the stories seem to be funny or positive or financially stable so what is it?

# ? Jan 2, 2022 16:17

Dr. Stab: Sep 12, 2010; 👨🏻‍⚕️🩺🔪🙀😱🙀

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

And how are there so many people willing to put up with that poo poo?

"Wife as servant" is a super normalized part of our culture, and while it was way more prevalent in past generations, a lot of people still believe that that's just how marriage is supposed to be. A thing you have to suffer through in order to get babies or social status or otherwise have a "successful" life.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 16:19

The Bramble: Mar 16, 2004

Um can we please cool it on using the m-word slur on this page? I don't want to have to start mass reporting people.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 16:22

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# ? May 30, 2024 16:36

DrManiac: Feb 29, 2012

Benagain posted:

I was always pissed off by those useless husband/father stories but now that I have a daughter I just....how can you not do the absolute minimum? How can you not want to do more?

Look at this chump who actually loves his kid lol.

A lot of guys treat having a kid the same as those people who adopt a dog and instantly abandon it once they realize you need to put in effort.

# ? Jan 2, 2022 16:30

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