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teen witch
Oct 9, 2012

Hugs are better than drugs!


Nyello teen witch here and I copied and subsequently pasted the last first post in the previous r/r thread. Rules might be updated…ehhh when we get to it.


Hello ladies and gents! This is version [REDACTED] of r/relationships. The previous thread is a little bloated so it's time to start things anew. It also allows for a jumping in point for people who are intimidated by length of the last one.

Despite being named r/relationships thread, the purview of the thread has extended past just that subreddit; even so there are a few things to remember just like the last thread:

1) Don't touch the poop.

2) Try not to go on pages long derails about your superior sex life.

3) Don't talk about how cool your relationships or sex life is; no one cares.

4) Don't defend pedophilia. Just don't.

5) Don't post rape/abuse stories.
Abuse of person or animal, sexual, physical or emotional.


Derails: accidentsderails will happen, sometimes organically! Some are positive, fun and occasionally sexy tangents. Others are soul sucking slap fights that bring out the worst traits posters and those are the derails we strive to curb. Minds are made up, mouths are undone.

With that, if I or another fool that’s an IK request a ceasefire on a derail, it isn’t for a probefest, but if it’s a probefest you want, it’s one you’ll get. I believe in giving someone a fair shot, but if you ignore a warning and get a sixer…I don’t want to hear it cause I know what I’ve done.

Fake stories: yeah some of these are some clown college attempts at writing. I don’t want every page filled with “FAKE. PHONY” so calm down Holden Caulfield. If it’s something you can hilariously debunk (like for instance, someone saying an event took place on Feb 31st), that’s fine.

But if crying fake gets excessive or it’s the only drat thing being posted, I’ll enforce the “post another drat thing, then” rule. I presume that this is a self explanatory rule.

Other things to keep in mind: goons are, and have always been, rather diverse and of all spots and stripes. This is more apparent in a post-Lowtax era and honestly? Good.

I urge you to be cognizant of that in this thread. How you act upon that is your own choice, but understand that some people won’t have the same experience as you and that poo poo happens. You may have a bit more needed to understand them, or conversely, other goons might not (or obstinately refuse to) get it. Have as much patience as needed or deserved. Some goons can, will, and want to learn and grow. Others will cling to their mudpit of idiocy as they know of nothing more and insist on making you a resident there. Expend energy accordingly, but if you need a second pair of eyes, don’t hesitate to DM me or email me at someawfulwitch at geemale dawt calm. I don’t have access to mod reports so that is usually the most expedient way of getting my attention outside of the Cuervo gold and the fine Columbian.

wise bards once said “you and me baby ain’t nothing but mammals, so let’s do it like they do on the discovery channel (build and document a thriving ecosystem of goons in their tall begoatsed towers, mocking redditors below for a laugh)”


If you don't like the thread title ask a mod to change it.

Here's a big ol list of stories collected from the thread.

teen witch fucked around with this message at 09:14 on Oct 24, 2021

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blight rhino
Feb 11, 2014

EXQUISITE LURKER RHINO


whoop

bring on all the dysfunctionals!


kntfkr posted:

Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat.

*ahem* boom.

blight rhino fucked around with this message at 03:34 on Oct 20, 2021

pnac attack
Jul 7, 2021



postin in the forum's trashiest thread :cool:

Beachcomber
May 21, 2007

Another day in paradise.




Slippery Tilde



pentyne
Nov 7, 2012

I just couldn't look at your old avatar anymore
Fucking nauseating!


Less talking more poly cheese bags

I hope everybody in the comments finds Jesus

Arsenic Lupin posted:

Wowza.
AITA for getting mad at my sister for piercing her nose?

I understand that is tied to a deeply traumatic event, however I

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for throwing my boyfriend a surprise party?

I. DID. NOT. YELL. AT. GRANDMA.

Invisible Clergy posted:

AITA for blowing up at my grandma?

pentyne fucked around with this message at 22:52 on Nov 26, 2021

Mx.
Dec 16, 2006

am i tired or am i angry




I calmly explained this trashy thread was temporary (it's permanent)

Evil Willow
Apr 26, 2007
Bored now...

AITA because I decided to stop cooking and cleaning to teach my husband a lesson in appreciation?

quote:

I do a majority of the housework, and I’m okay with this. I genuinely don’t mind it. My issue was not with wanting more help from him. It was just because I felt like he didn’t appreciate it.

I’m a nurse who’s been working shifts that are longer than usual (no biggie). So when I got home there was a lot of dishes in the sink since I’ve just wanted to shower and sleep when I got home the past few days.

And my husband says, “I’m not sure if you’ve been waiting for those dishes to do themselves, but spoiler alert, they’re not going to”. I told him “no they aren’t, so you better get on em”. He laughed and we moved on. I went to shower, came back and did the dishes.

He then says there’s something he needs to talk to me about, and he looked really serious. I thought he was gonna ask for a divorce or something.

But he said something along the lines of, “honey, I know you’ve been working late this past week, and I understand you’ve got a lot on your plate at work. But I’ve had to eat cup of noodles and hot pockets these last few night”. So he basically told me I had been “slacking” and he was “paying the price for it”. I told him that he was perfectly capable of finding something else himself. And we argued a bit then made up.

But I decided to just stop doing chores or anything. And the house became a mess, he’s been whining about the TV dinners he’s been eating. And since I haven’t been grocery shopping we’re also getting low on those. He finally broke and apologized for not being more appreciative. He’s since changed his tune.

But he told me that I was acting like a, “B-word for those few weeks”. I feel it was the only way to get him to be more appreciative though.

It lasted a few weeks. Not months. That was a typo.

We both work full time

Mx.
Dec 16, 2006

am i tired or am i angry




Seems like it would be less effort to just murder your husband

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER


Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat.

The Bloop
Jul 5, 2004




kntfkr posted:

Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat.

Cthulu Carl
Apr 16, 2006

You need to click the icon.





kntfkr posted:

Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat.

AITA for Posting Below kntfkr?

kimbo305
Jun 9, 2007

He is I, and I am him



I rushed through to the end of last thread to try to suggest this, but it was too long, too late:

Last time we went out it was 2 fish sandwiches, 2 chicken sandwiches, a large Dr. Pepper, and a milk, all eaten with no manners.

Bruceski
Aug 21, 2007

The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.



kntfkr posted:

Everything below this rear end in a top hat is a post.

Testekill
Nov 1, 2012

I demand to be taken seriously

:aronrex:



Evil Willow posted:

AITA because I decided to stop cooking and cleaning to teach my husband a lesson in appreciation?

Should start breaking plates over his head.


kntfkr posted:

Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat.

How dare

Motronic
Nov 6, 2009





Grimey Drawer

kntfkr posted:

Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat.

InB4......oh....yeah.

ShootaBoy
Jan 6, 2010

Anime is Bad.
Except for Pokemon, Valkyria Chronicles and 100% OJ.


kimbo305 posted:

I rushed through to the end of last thread to try to suggest this, but it was too long, too late:

Last time we went out it was 2 fish sandwiches, 2 chicken sandwiches, a large Dr. Pepper, and a milk, all eaten with no manners.

Honestly, the milk was the weirdest part of that. Like what kinda place serves chicken and fish fastfood but also milk?

Quackles
Aug 11, 2018

Pixels of Light.




kntfkr posted:

Everyone above this post is an rear end in a top hat.

:smuggo:

Seth Pecksniff
May 27, 2004

The human face is, after all, nothing more nor less than a mask.


Ooo I can groundfloor this one! :)

Mormon Nailer
Oct 27, 2014

PHANTOM QUEEN




Evil Willow posted:

AITA because I decided to stop cooking and cleaning to teach my husband a lesson in appreciation?

Wow get a better husband.

packetmantis
Feb 26, 2013



I didn't know Jesus was missing. :ohdear:

Megillah Gorilla
Sep 22, 2003

One Potato to rule them all,
One Potato to find them,
One Potato to bring them all
And in the darkness bind them.





Bread Liar

Starting the thread with a trash tier husband upset his bang maid isn't doing the maid part anymore :kiss:

Gotta respect the classics.

sephiRoth IRA
Jun 13, 2007

"Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality."

-Carl Sagan


You know, that lady with the kid-unfriensly dog could have solved the whole thing with some dog heelies

Horsebanger
Jun 25, 2009

Steering wheel! Hey! Steering wheel! Someone tell him to give it to me!


kntfkr posted:

Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat.

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

Listen to Cylindricule!
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule



Evil Willow posted:

AITA because I decided to stop cooking and cleaning to teach my husband a lesson in appreciation?

What do men do

AmiYumi
Oct 10, 2005

I FORGOT TO HAIL KING TORG


Brawnfire posted:

What do men do
Do I really get the honor? First in the new thread??

Ahem…DICAP!

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009



Gotta get in on the ground floor!

therobit
Aug 19, 2008

EVERYTHING I TYPE IS UTTERLY WORTHLESS


Jesus Christ I’m surrounded by assholes.

Admiralty Flag
Jun 7, 2007

I do not wish to create joinder with your stank ass



Slippery Tilde

Evil Willow posted:

AITA because I decided to stop cooking and cleaning to teach my husband a lesson in appreciation?

If my wife ever serves me with divorce papers I'll simply counter with a curated selection of r/r posts like this one (and of course some rear end-wiping impaired men) along with a note asking if she really wants to take her chances finding someone who meets basic human requirements, you know, like me. Why is it so difficult for these manchildren?

Metaline
Aug 20, 2003




Do people chant DICAP in the replies of these Reddit threads or is that bannable?

Xlorp
Jan 23, 2008




This is the thread where we find that the 15-second rule also applies to ethics

A Pack of Kobolds
Mar 23, 2007




Pete kicks rear end.

Fight Man does not kick rear end.

endlessmonotony
Nov 4, 2009

:yikes:
These are some bad posts, but they're not as bad as OOCC. I pray you recover enough to someday throw OOCC's keyboard into the sea and claim your rightful role as the worst C-SPAM poster.

therobit posted:

Jesus Christ I’m surrounded by assholes.

We all feel that way.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009



This is a terrible way to start off the new thread but I found this one so refreshing for the OP considering their situation before getting into it.

Moving into my [26F] boyfriend's [28M] home that belongs to him, how do I make sure I'm protected and safe financially and legally?

quote:

I'm not sure if this is the correct subreddit to post so correct me if I'm wrong but I do need advice on this topic.

My [26F] and my boyfriend [28M] have been dating for a little over a year. However, before we met/started dating, he had already been saving up to buy a house in the future. He and I both currently live at our respective families' homes (we both reside in Arizona) and at around our 11-month mark in our relationship, we started talking about the next steps that included moving in together.

Now, personally, I'm not in a financially secure spot at the moment to buy a house just yet, he told me that while it would be under his name, he still wants me to move in with him. I understand that this would basically be a situation where I'm paying a monthly rent to him. I'm not sure what are the next steps to take about asking the right questions in order to make sure that I am safe and protected when he buys this home and I move in with him. We both have communicated that we are committed to one another and see ourselves building a future together but if in the event we break up, I want to make sure I don't get screwed over financially or what not? I'm not even sure if I'm phrasing this correctly either so if someone has been in a situation similar, how did you go about planning this out?

Anything helps, or if a better subreddit is more applicable, let me know. Thanks!

TL;DR: moving into boyfriend's home he wants to buy that is under his own name. (I'm not financially in a position to buy a home just yet). While he wants me to move in with him, how do I make sure I am protected and won't get screwed over if in the event something bad happens where I'm not legally bound to anything or if in the event we break up?

EDIT: thanks everyone for their thoughts and opinions! nothing is set in stone yet on the move, its all still in the talks. i just made this post so i can prep myself for when we do discuss the logistics since i have little knowledge on this sort of thing. i definitely learned a lot and thats the beauty of reddit. i appreciate all the advice and different perspectives.

MarcusSA
Sep 23, 2007



Sign a lease but stipulate it month to month :shrug:

Mx.
Dec 16, 2006

am i tired or am i angry




"the beauty of reddit"???????

Das Boo
Jun 9, 2011

There was a GHOST here. It's gone now.




kntfkr posted:

Everyone blow this post in the rear end in a top hat.

BabyFur Denny
Mar 18, 2003


Metaline posted:

Do people chant DICAP in the replies of these Reddit threads or is that bannable?

DICAP is a lovely lie, at least if you have a minimum of standards regarding the quality of dicks. It's incredibly hard to find decent dick.

Batterypowered7
Aug 8, 2009

The mist that chills you keeps me warm.



BabyFur Denny posted:

DICAP is a lovely lie, at least if you have a minimum of standards regarding the quality of dicks. It's incredibly hard to find decent dick.

Woah woah woah there, nobody ever said anything about decent.

PHIZ KALIFA
Dec 21, 2011

#mood


BabyFur Denny posted:

DICAP is a lovely lie, at least if you have a minimum of standards regarding the quality of dicks. It's incredibly hard to find decent dick.

BabyFur Denny, i have some questions about this post, and how it relates to your username.

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EVERY TIME GOING
Mar 17, 2006

cant stop wont stop


This thread is one of those GBS irregularities like the Red Letter Media thread, where it always seems to be top but only the insular few know what to post inside :iiam:

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