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Renegret posted:Me before kids: My wife before kids: OHMYGOD YOU MADE A RETCHING SOUND AAAAGH *sympathetic vomiting* My wife after the kid: Can you come grab a towel, I have a double handful of vomit
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Apr 8, 2022 01:40
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I've said before but the whole "I was terrible with (gross bodily fluid) and then I had a kid!" thing doesn't hold for everyone. I'm awful about vomit, partner is awful about feces, and having a kid changed that for neither of us. We just cut a deal that if we're both available, whoever isn't the one dry heaving (or possibly actually heaving) deals with it. Unless only one of us is available. Then we put on our adult panties and deal with it. Dry heaving the entire time.
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Apr 8, 2022 03:29
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My baby has pooped twice in 4 days and only greatly strained to do it instead of screaming for a half hour to push out a log as hard as granite. I'm so happy about this. Why am I so happy about poop. What has being a dad done to me?!
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Apr 8, 2022 03:34
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AngryRobotsInc posted:Then we put on our adult panties and deal with it. Dry heaving the entire time. I mean, at the end of the day this is it. It's not so much "I'm fine with [fluid] now", moreso "I need to handle this for my kid's sake" and then sometimes [fluid] being [consistency] means your kid will no longer be sad and then you're the guy who's happy about [fluid] at the end of the day, you can be happy about solid poop while also dry heaving at it
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Apr 8, 2022 04:22
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Solid poop is fine if I see it If I've put my finger in it during the dipstick check, and it gets under my nail Well, that's another, darker me
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Apr 8, 2022 04:28
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Waiting with my kid to get his ear tubes and adenoids done right now. He’s handling not getting breakfast like a champ. I’m so nervous.
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Apr 8, 2022 07:06
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Weee, I am hearing from school that Daniel spent his first whole class with the rest of the kids and it went well (arts & craft). Both boys (twins) have ADHD and even with medication and assistants they've been unable to be in a class of kids, just too distracting, so the school has made for them their own class room where they get dedicated teachers and lessons so they can learn in ways that work for them. They've been attempting now and then to integrate them back into the bigger class with mixed success. Daniel has been doing well on that, David unfortunately has not, but we're hoping he gets there too.
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Apr 8, 2022 09:25
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ChickenWing posted:I mean, at the end of the day this is it. It's not so much "I'm fine with [fluid] now", moreso "I need to handle this for my kid's sake" and then sometimes [fluid] being [consistency] means your kid will no longer be sad and then you're the guy who's happy about [fluid] Pretty much. I'm a lot better with vomit now but only if it's my child, and only because I've dealt with it so much that I'm numb to it. I still don't like it, I never will, but I can handle it just fine. But if I get a whiff of some random drunk guy's barf then yeah I'm gonna have trouble holding it together. I still remember my kid's first barf. My concern of his wellbeing overwrote any kind of ick factor so I managed to push through. That was the beginning of his milk allergy so I got real used to it real fast because it became a common thing until we got everything figured out.
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Apr 8, 2022 13:23
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My second thought when puke or an atypical poop comes into the picture, after immediate concern for my child, is how is this going to affect everyone’s sleep and/or daycare eligibility. Ickiness is solidly lower down on the list at this point.
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Apr 8, 2022 13:37
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His Divine Shadow posted:Both boys (twins) have ADHD and even with medication and assistants they've been unable to be in a class of kids, just too distracting, so the school has made for them their own class room where they get dedicated teachers and lessons so they can learn in ways that work for them. That’s amazing. Is this a public school doing all this?
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Apr 8, 2022 13:57
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lifg posted:That’s amazing. Is this a public school doing all this? Yes public school in a small town
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Apr 8, 2022 16:35
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My daughter turns fifteen today. Hard to believe time has gone by this fast. Sometimes I feel old and others I feel like no time has passed.
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Apr 8, 2022 17:06
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UnkleBoB posted:My daughter turns fifteen today. Hard to believe time has gone by this fast. Sometimes I feel old and others I feel like no time has passed. It keeps smacking me in the face that my son will be turning 18 in a couple months. It doesn't feel like it's been that long most of the time.
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Apr 8, 2022 17:56
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Don’t worry, time moves very slowly once they turn 2 and develop opinions
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Apr 8, 2022 19:47
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UnkleBoB posted:My daughter turns fifteen today. Hard to believe time has gone by this fast. Sometimes I feel old and others I feel like no time has passed. I guess I haven't yet gotten to the point where I'm nostalgic about my daughter being little, or scared by her growing up fast, or anything. Sure, she's only 3½ yet, but my wife is already talking about how she want another little one and I'm like "no, babies are annoying and this kid is only getting more fun as she grows". I feel like we're only now getting into the fun part and I loathe the thought of going through another three years of baby/toddler-dom.
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Apr 8, 2022 22:32
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The kids were being total shits during dinner tonight, so they both got sent to bed early. As I'm tucking in my 6yo and reminding her why she was sent to bed early, she says "I'm glad you sent me to bed early because I love sleeping." and then turns over and shuts her eyes. 
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Apr 9, 2022 00:40
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Anyone have suggestions for some decent fake grass squares? I have a little play structure but our yard is just full concrete and I don't want them to crack their heads like a raw egg when the inevitably fall off. I looked at the rubberized mats that playgrounds use but it was gonna be like $500 plus hundreds more in delivery fees.
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Apr 9, 2022 01:08
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boquiabierta posted:Waiting with my kid to get his ear tubes and adenoids done right now. He’s handling not getting breakfast like a champ. I’m so nervous. Trip report: surgery went well and he’s recovering well. Don’t know what we’re going to do with him for a week out of daycare ahhhh. Doesn’t seem to notice any difference in his hearing yet but I’m hopeful his language will improve. It was so sad when he came out of anesthesia and absolutely lost it. So disoriented and scared I could barely comfort him at all. He was totally calm before the procedure though and let them take him from me without crying at all! (Which was both nice and also sad, parenting paradox.) It’s amaaazing to not have to torture him with nasal irrigation twice a day anymore. I’m not sure he notices it’s gone but we certainly are glad to not have to keep waterboarding him.
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Apr 9, 2022 12:40
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Well that’s new. My kid fought her nap today by taking off her pants and diaper and peeing all over the bed. At least she had the courtesy to throw all the blankets and stuffed animals overboard beforehand.
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Apr 9, 2022 18:46
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boquiabierta posted:Trip report: surgery went well and he’s recovering well. Don’t know what we’re going to do with him for a week out of daycare ahhhh. Doesn’t seem to notice any difference in his hearing yet but I’m hopeful his language will improve. We just did tubes a week ago and the anesthesiologist warned me that for some reason there is around a 30% chance they wake up terrified and unable to be consoled. They don't really know why or how it happens but he at least prepared me in case it did.
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Apr 9, 2022 22:47
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Theses children we both do adore So come my wife lets clean some more Don’t worry if you’re stiff and sore I’m sure we’ve cleaned this bit before
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Apr 9, 2022 23:05
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My son's height kind of snuck up on me, since I only see him around the same people all the time, and smaller changes go a bit unnoticed. But my mom and brothers came to visit yesterday, and I look back to see him standing next to my 6' tall brother, and it was like "Oh dang". He is definitely over 6', probably about 6'1.5" or 6'2". I think he has a tiny bit of growth still left in him, but it's slowed way way down. Was funny to see him just absolutely looming over my tiny mom, in sheer excitement as she rung up his Legos.
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Apr 10, 2022 11:39
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My daughter gets so angry if I ask her what the person on her craft videos is making. It's weird.
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Apr 10, 2022 14:55
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Why does this Easter Bunny look like a FNAF character. I don't blame my son for crying, I'd be crying too if I had to get that close.
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Apr 10, 2022 17:32
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Do kids actually believe in the Easter bunny the same way they believe in Santa?
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Apr 10, 2022 18:56
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I recall finding it vaguely ludicrous in a way I didn't find Santa.
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Apr 10, 2022 19:13
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Parenting lifehack that made my husband feel like a genius: our kid has fought naps at home all his life while sleeping like a perfect angel at daycare. We strung up a camping hammock in our basement and suddenly *he actually asks to go take naps when he's tired!* What the hell, I'd have hosed up my drywall for this ages ago if I'd realized it could be so easy
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Apr 10, 2022 21:14
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thunderdome winner
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We’re dealing with a stressful situation right now. We have a 12-year-old dog who has cancer and is just generally crotchety. So far she’s been fine with our son, up until the past few weeks. Now, if she’s lying down somewhere and our son walks into the room, she starts growling and barking at him. It’s obvious to me that she’s anxious around him, not surprising since he’s loud and moves fast, throws stuff, etc. And we definitely didn’t do as much as we should have to keep him from touching her and getting in her face. Of course when I google this, all the results say “get rid of the dog immediately”. Needless to say we feel incredibly guilty even contemplating this, especially due to her age and health. I’m thinking now of gating off a few rooms and just keeping her there as much as possible when our son is home. Anyone else dealt with this?
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Apr 11, 2022 00:45
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Went out to the kitchen last night, noticed that the bag of Munchkins that my (pregnant, craving-riddled) wife got from Dunkin a couple days ago was...not how I left it. It was hanging out of the "fruit" basket it was in. And there were chocolaty crumbs on the floor that I had mopped less than three hours prior. #1 has been known to sneak food before*. He had gotten out of the bath around 5:30 and said to me, "I'm gonna go make some food." So I nodded and sent him on his way while the other kids and I proceeded to watch The Thundermans. When the oddity was discovered, I told my wife to check the cameras - since we have had issues with lying in the past, we have approximately 90% of the common living space, including the kitchen, covered with Kasa cameras. Sure as poo poo, that sneaky little so-and-so was stuffing his face with Mom's donut holes (that she had already shared twice) and leftover brownies that were sitting on the counter in a lidded Pyrex. I hid the donuts and brownies as she was watching him snarf them down. Then, before we can even be sly about confronting him this morning, he slinks out there after getting up and roots around until he finds the drat donuts and starts stuffing his face. Caught again by camera. Like did he forget or something? Don't try to be a sneaky poo poo dude  * EDIT: When deep-cleaning their bedroom, we have found, around and under his bed, the wrappers of scores of granola bar, fruit snack, and various other pre-packaged snacks. D34THROW fucked around with this message at 16:07 on Apr 11, 2022 |
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Apr 11, 2022 15:12
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D34THROW posted:Went out to the kitchen last night, noticed that the bag of Munchkins that my (pregnant, craving-riddled) wife got from Dunkin a couple days ago was...not how I left it. It was hanging out of the "fruit" basket it was in. And there were chocolaty crumbs on the floor that I had mopped less than three hours prior. how'd you get cameras into my kitchen please stop doxxing me
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Apr 11, 2022 15:30
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Silent Linguist posted:We’re dealing with a stressful situation right now. We have a 12-year-old dog who has cancer and is just generally crotchety. So far she’s been fine with our son, up until the past few weeks. Now, if she’s lying down somewhere and our son walks into the room, she starts growling and barking at him. Keep them separated. She’s telling you she’s uncomfortable and you need to help establish boundaries. I wouldn’t want someone poking me in the face or grabbing my hair all the time, so it isn’t fair to expect our animals to put up with it either. Don’t punish her either - you want those cues. She’s trying to get you to help her. Let things cool off a bit and then work on having the small one throw treats towards her, with no expectations of other interactions. Don’t isolate her completely - still keep up the same time you spend with her. Also be mindful that she’s also 12 - dogs just like people can get a bit crankier with age. She may never warm up fully to the kid after this. A lot of the “cute” stuff people post - kids laying on animals, etc - are dangerous/ignoring signs and cues from the animals and then wonder one day why they “snap”.
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Apr 11, 2022 20:28
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I have a 12 year old rescue chihuahua that despises our 14 month old. We just keep them separated, which is pretty easy to do since the dog prefers to nap upstairs and the kid doesn’t go upstairs. Just make sure the dog knows she is still loved 
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Apr 11, 2022 21:55
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How do fine baby hair forehead hairs work Do they just grow slower/more fine, or do they just never grow long enough to put in a pony tail Looks like my wife and her sister had them, can't tell if they just trimmed them, rather than wait to let them grow out. My baby's forehead/hair line hairs are already longer than in the childhood photos I've seen of my wife
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Apr 11, 2022 22:01
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Honestly no idea. My first kid had enough hair to put into a mini ponytail at 18 months, everything on the whole head grew evenly. Kid number 2 is almost 22 months and the top of the head/forehead hair is so short I literally can’t do anything with it. It’s like an unkempt mullet.
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Apr 11, 2022 22:52
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6 years old, hair halfway down her back, my daughter refuses ponytails, pigtails, braids, anything. So her mom just cut it off at the shoulders
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Apr 12, 2022 00:49
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Does anyone have tips for raising a kid multilingually? I grew up speaking french and english, my wife grew up speaking kazakh and russian, and we really want the little one to come up knowing all of them. All of them get chirped around our home so I guess it won't be that hard, but the ideal is fluency in all four. And I grew up getting shat on for a french accent (in the USA), she's an immigrant who got shat on then and even more now, so we're also trying to avoid them having a non-native english accent when they go to school.
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Apr 12, 2022 04:45
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:Does anyone have tips for raising a kid multilingually? I grew up speaking french and english, my wife grew up speaking kazakh and russian, and we really want the little one to come up knowing all of them. All of them get chirped around our home so I guess it won't be that hard, but the ideal is fluency in all four. And I grew up getting shat on for a french accent (in the USA), she's an immigrant who got shat on then and even more now, so we're also trying to avoid them having a non-native english accent when they go to school. There were just a couple pages of discussion about this actually, check out the posts starting here: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3508127&perpage=40&noseen=1&pagenumber=693#post522043474
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Apr 12, 2022 04:49
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I've been keeping an eye on my sleeping son for the last twenty minutes while my wife showered and got ready for work Then when she's about to go downstairs she asks me if I can watch him ...yeah?
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Apr 12, 2022 12:14
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Brawnfire posted:I've been keeping an eye on my sleeping son for the last twenty minutes while my wife showered and got ready for work I watch my son sleep on the baby camera all the drat time. It's so peaceful.
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Apr 12, 2022 12:46
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Conversely, my toddler threw her door open this morning and announced “I’M ALL DONE.” so I’d say the tone around sleep has changed. Also I’d like to thank some unnamed kid in her preschool room for introducing the comedic concept of “____ eats doo doo” to her. Thanks, thanks.
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Apr 12, 2022 12:57
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