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Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Enjoy every sandwich.

Smellrose

Gazpacho posted:

don't sweat it, celsius can't hover in midair forever

I was just hoping it would happen today because Golden State won the finals and a nice bitcoin collapse would be a cherry on top

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trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy
It's not gonna hit the magic number today. That's what weekends are for.

Shame Boy
Mar 2, 2010

post hole digger posted:

sounding the LUNC alarm

lol

Shame Boy
Mar 2, 2010

trucutru posted:

I ignored butts for 2-3 years so it's good to see that the classics never truly die



Fire sale! BUY BUY BUY!

i like that even going by that you never even got to any of the sell colors this round

Just a Moron
Nov 11, 2021

I can't find the exact meltbrainrdb tweet atm, but Just lolling at needing "good opsec" to do my totally legit job that also has specific and arbitrarily enforced retreat location requirements.

:thunk:

Just a Moron
Nov 11, 2021

Wholdu've thunk that a currency designed for doing crimes on the internet would turn into such a disgusting fun house mirror of scam machines built on top of scam machines when combined with heavy financialization in a cyberneticized environment?

RPATDO_LAMD
Mar 22, 2013

🐘🪠🍆
if you can kidnap an exec on vacation and beat them with a pipe wrench until they tell you the private keys, you get all the money for free with no chargebacks(tm)

Cybernetic Vermin
Apr 18, 2005

RokosCockatrice posted:

What happened to the crypto market? Was it just that one giant scam that crumbled, idk, luna i think?

I know the market is in freefall but I've been too turned around to think about what actually caused it

what has been happening recently is best illustrated by making a version of that "no take only throw" meme where the dog is labeled "hodlers" and it goes "no supply flexibility or inflation" and "only high passive interest"

LanceHunter
Nov 12, 2016

Beautiful People Club


It’s been interesting watching Bitcoin maximalists on Twitter loudly proclaim that “crypto” was doomed from the start and nothing but scams, because they were all ripping off the one true currency of Bitcoin…

https://twitter.com/coryklippsten/status/1537474450815234048

Shageletic
Jul 25, 2007

Computer Serf posted:

users have to pay gas fees per byte for code they want to execute

there was an attempt to make an infinite loop by making a waterfall lottery pool where the last user transaction wins the lottery (minus a sum larger than fees to start another round). the idea was bots would fight until the lottery pool snowballs and a bunch of other users try to win the pool by betting they'll be the last user to press the button.

https://old.reddit.com/r/Buttcoin/comments/7sws4d/ladies_and_gentlemen_i_have_an_innovative_idea/



it seems like there were some early attempts at deploying a contract like this but they didn't really take off and no one promoted them

code:
/**
 *Submitted for verification at Etherscan.io on 2018-01-25
*/

pragma solidity ^0.4.18;

// See thecryptobutton.com
contract Countdown {
    
    uint public deadline;
    address owner;
    address public winner;
    uint public reward = 0;
    uint public tips = 0;
    uint public buttonClicks = 0;
    
    function Countdown() public payable {
        owner = msg.sender;
        deadline = now + 3 hours;
        winner = msg.sender;
        reward += msg.value;
    }
    
    function ClickButton() public payable {
        // Pay at least 1 dollar to click the button
        require(msg.value >= 0.001 ether);
        
        // Refund people who click the button
        // after it expires
        if (now > deadline) {
            revert();
        }
    
        reward += msg.value * 8 / 10;
        // Take 20% tip for server costs.
        tips += msg.value * 2 / 10;
        winner = msg.sender;
        deadline = now + 30 minutes;
        buttonClicks += 1;
    }
    
    // The winner is responsible for withdrawing the funds
    // after the button expires
    function Win() public {
        require(msg.sender == winner);
        require(now > deadline);
        uint pendingReward = reward;
        reward = 0;
        winner.transfer(pendingReward);
    }
    
    function withdrawTips() public {
        // The owner can only withdraw the tips
        uint pendingTips = tips;
        tips = 0;
        owner.transfer(pendingTips);
    }
    
}
:dukedoge:

This is really funny and honest. I love it.

Shageletic
Jul 25, 2007

GenJoe posted:

I've always been a dumb "what if I could code my way into winning the stock market" guy, which again, is a terrible idea on so many levels -- even the quantitative finance people who are pulling low 7 figgies in NYC will be like, yeah, there's no way we could make money doing what we do if we didn't have the capital and regulatory support that you get from working at the institutional level, if you're a retail trader just go to the roulette table and you'll outperform basically everyone else

but still the fantasy is a nice one, so I was looking at crypto exchanges on a whim in 2020 and found a relatively not sketch one that was offering a (tbh extremely) generous .03% rebate for any limit orders fulfilled on their exchange. I coded a dumb little bot over the weekend that would place orders at the best buy and sell price over and over again, and then threw a $100 in and let it rip

it treaded water for a bit, and then crypto upswing 2021 happened and it started netting like 10-20% a day from the volume and positive price swings, and then I started putting more and more effort into it and in a few months it was up to like, $10,000, and was pulling in $5-8k on good months, and like $1-3k during downswing months. there was an upper limit on the volume it could make from the exchange though, so it leveled and wasn't like compounding infinitely or anything

don't get me wrong it's still extremely gambly and I got super lucky with timing at a lot of points, but the rebate was enough for it to absorb most downward swings, and it profited super well when the price of crypto was either flat or on the up.

unfortunately in May after the luna meltdown it kind of just started treading water again and wasn't really making or losing money, and I was basically out of optimizations I could try, and crypto looked like it was about to die at any minute inshallah, so I pulled out the rest of the money and shut it down. rip crypto robot. I will always think fondly of u

What are you gonna declare on your taxes?

infernal machines
Oct 11, 2012

we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

LanceHunter posted:

It’s been interesting watching Bitcoin maximalists on Twitter loudly proclaim that “crypto” was doomed from the start and nothing but scams, because they were all ripping off the one true currency of Bitcoin…

https://twitter.com/coryklippsten/status/1537474450815234048

it's revolutionary. basically the khmer rouge of currencies

Alan Smithee
Jan 4, 2005


A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

infernal machines posted:

it's revolutionary. basically the khmer rouge of currencies

year 0

is the same value as year 10

Jean-Paul Shartre
Jan 16, 2015

this sentence no verb


I mean he's not wrong. Agriculture, the industrial revolution, and Bitcoin all cause massive harm to the natural environment.

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slćgt skal fřlge slćgters gang



JohnCompany posted:

I mean he's not wrong. Agriculture, the industrial revolution, and Bitcoin all cause massive harm to the natural environment.

:hmmyes:

josh04
Oct 19, 2008


"THE FLASH IS THE REASON
TO RACE TO THE THEATRES"

This title contains sponsored content.

Alan Smithee posted:

year 0

is the same value as year 10

when you think about it, daylight savings is temporal fiat

Just-In-Timeberlake
Aug 18, 2003

GenJoe posted:

I've always been a dumb "what if I could code my way into winning the stock market" guy, which again, is a terrible idea on so many levels -- even the quantitative finance people who are pulling low 7 figgies in NYC will be like, yeah, there's no way we could make money doing what we do if we didn't have the capital and regulatory support that you get from working at the institutional level, if you're a retail trader just go to the roulette table and you'll outperform basically everyone else

but still the fantasy is a nice one, so I was looking at crypto exchanges on a whim in 2020 and found a relatively not sketch one that was offering a (tbh extremely) generous .03% rebate for any limit orders fulfilled on their exchange. I coded a dumb little bot over the weekend that would place orders at the best buy and sell price over and over again, and then threw a $100 in and let it rip

it treaded water for a bit, and then crypto upswing 2021 happened and it started netting like 10-20% a day from the volume and positive price swings, and then I started putting more and more effort into it and in a few months it was up to like, $10,000, and was pulling in $5-8k on good months, and like $1-3k during downswing months. there was an upper limit on the volume it could make from the exchange though, so it leveled and wasn't like compounding infinitely or anything

don't get me wrong it's still extremely gambly and I got super lucky with timing at a lot of points, but the rebate was enough for it to absorb most downward swings, and it profited super well when the price of crypto was either flat or on the up.

unfortunately in May after the luna meltdown it kind of just started treading water again and wasn't really making or losing money, and I was basically out of optimizations I could try, and crypto looked like it was about to die at any minute inshallah, so I pulled out the rest of the money and shut it down. rip crypto robot. I will always think fondly of u

I have a buddy that was able to read the tea leaves and put a bunch of money into ETH when it was $7 and got rid of it all at near peak, even after taxes he's pretty much set.

The was pretty much his only foray into crypto and he got monumentally lucky, but good on him.

Bluecobra
Sep 11, 2001

The Future's So Bright I Gotta Wear Shades

Shageletic posted:

What are you gonna declare on your taxes?

yeah I would be curious about this as well. isn't it going to be a huge pain to type in all these orders into turbotax?

Chalks
Sep 30, 2009

Just-In-Timeberlake posted:

I have a buddy that was able to read the tea leaves and put a bunch of money into ETH when it was $7 and got rid of it all at near peak, even after taxes he's pretty much set.

The was pretty much his only foray into crypto and he got monumentally lucky, but good on him.

Selling crypto is morally good because you're taking money directly from crypto bros

Eeyo
Aug 29, 2004

yeah you’re also taking money from relatively poor and uninformed bag holders too :shrug:

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003

I buy feet pics🍆

Still just a standard 8949 form, if the broker has any sense whatsoever it'll be a block you import and then Turbotax creates the schedule of trades and computes your bottom line. It'll be all short term so subject to standard taxes.

If not, then, uh, good luck with that.

Deep Dish Fuckfest
Sep 6, 2006

Advanced
Computer Touching


Toilet Rascal
eh, just eyeball the profit you made and put that as one big transaction, no big deal

EricBauman
Nov 30, 2005

DOLF IS RECHTVAARDIG

kw0134 posted:

if the broker has any sense whatsoever

do you even hear what you're saying?

LanceHunter
Nov 12, 2016

Beautiful People Club


Eeyo posted:

yeah you’re also taking money from relatively poor and uninformed bag holders too :shrug:

Removing actual capital from the crypto ecosystem is always a moral good. Adding any capital to that ecosystem is always a moral ill.

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003

I buy feet pics🍆

EricBauman posted:

do you even hear what you're saying?
I'm kind of surprised by how well the less dodgy brokers do things like report to the IRS and poo poo, which would basically be the same data you'd use in Turbotax, which is why it's even something I can suggest. But obviously there are various levels of "sense" floating around so who the gently caress knows! You're supposed to report every transaction, but the real bottom line is that your gains match up to what you say it is and how you come to that conclusion is something that the IRS isn't gonna examine line by line if the total you say happened and the total the broker reported is consistent with each other. Robo day traders at large institutions can literally do millions of transactions every trading day and ain't no one going through that with a fine-toothed comb if the =SUM(A:A) matches the =SUM(C:C).

Chris Knight
Jun 5, 2002

me @ ur posts


Fun Shoe
gg JayZ

https://twitter.com/sc/status/1534921134612914182

https://twitter.com/coach_hugginsjr/status/1536827823591145475

Alan Smithee
Jan 4, 2005


A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...
man this is worse than Matt Damon

Neito
Feb 18, 2009

😌Finally, an avatar the describes my love of tech❤️‍💻, my love of anime💖🎎, and why I'll never see a real girl 🙆‍♀️naked😭.

RokosCockatrice posted:

What happened to the crypto market? Was it just that one giant scam that crumbled, idk, luna i think?

I know the market is in freefall but I've been too turned around to think about what actually caused it

So a lot of the exchanges were backed up by Terra, which was an "Algorthmic stablecoin" intended to be pegged to the dollar. The problem with this is that there were no actual real dollars in the system; Gerard explains it pretty well on his site:

David Gerard posted:

Here’s how UST is stabilised:

If UST goes above one dollar, more UST is created by burning a dollar’s worth of LUNA token for each new UST.
If UST goes below one dollar, UST is burnt for LUNA tokens.
Why are LUNA tokens worth anything? Well, they just are, OK?

What's important to note is that they had no plans for things like "What if we print more Luna but UST doesn't go up" or "Why would we code a circuit breaker into the magical money printer", meaning that once UST lost it's peg too low, they started printing billions of Luna, because there was no limit on how much Luna could be in existance at once. Then your standard crazy hyperinflation spiral starts: the peg on Terra fell faster than they could burn Terra to print Luna, and IIRC the two chains fell out of sync at one point, and I think they froze or forked the luna chain or something.

ETA: Gerard, as usual, explains it better than me: https://davidgerard.co.uk/blockchain/2022/05/10/terras-stablecoin-does-a-2008-crisis-ust-crashes-and-takes-bitcoin-with-it/

evilweasel
Aug 24, 2002

Neito posted:

So a lot of the exchanges were backed up by Terra, which was an "Algorthmic stablecoin" intended to be pegged to the dollar. The problem with this is that there were no actual real dollars in the system; Gerard explains it pretty well on his site:

What's important to note is that they had no plans for things like "What if we print more Luna but UST doesn't go up" or "Why would we code a circuit breaker into the magical money printer", meaning that once UST lost it's peg too low, they started printing billions of Luna, because there was no limit on how much Luna could be in existance at once. Then your standard crazy hyperinflation spiral starts: the peg on Terra fell faster than they could burn Terra to print Luna, and IIRC the two chains fell out of sync at one point, and I think they froze or forked the luna chain or something.

ETA: Gerard, as usual, explains it better than me: https://davidgerard.co.uk/blockchain/2022/05/10/terras-stablecoin-does-a-2008-crisis-ust-crashes-and-takes-bitcoin-with-it/

to be clear it's not they had "no plans" for the downsides. it is that there are no plans you can have that does not boil down to "continue conning the marks so they don't lose confidence"

once the confidence is gone (and it should never be there in the first place), there is nothing that can keep it afloat.

Shame Boy
Mar 2, 2010

Neito posted:

Gerard explains it pretty well on his site:

please, his name is :gerard:

Deep Dish Fuckfest
Sep 6, 2006

Advanced
Computer Touching


Toilet Rascal
isn't he a vampire or something?

i don't trust vampires

Boxturret
Oct 3, 2013

Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

Deep Dish Fuckfest posted:

isn't he a vampire or something?

i don't trust vampires

the assisted living vampire of wikipedia: David :gerard:

CommieGIR
Aug 22, 2006

The blue glow is a feature, not a bug


Pillbug
Basically they recreated the very fiat currency they claimed they wanted to replaced but with even less good faith backing it.

Like everything they do, they do it worse than what they want to replace.

Deep Dish Fuckfest
Sep 6, 2006

Advanced
Computer Touching


Toilet Rascal
what are you talking about? it's created far more investment opportunities* and entrepreneurs** than any other currency in history. it's success story*** after success story****

*scams
**scammers
***scams
****also scams

Malloc Voidstar
May 7, 2007

Fuck the cowboys. Unf. Fuck em hard.
https://www.wsj.com/articles/battered-crypto-hedge-fund-three-arrows-capital-considers-asset-sales-bailout-11655469932
Crypto Hedge Fund Three Arrows Capital Considers Asset Sales, Bailout

Cryptocurrency-focused hedge fund Three Arrows Capital Ltd. has hired legal and financial advisers to help work out a solution for its investors and lenders, after suffering heavy losses from a broad market selloff in digital assets, the firm’s founders said on Friday.

“We have always been believers in crypto and we still are,” Kyle Davies, Three Arrows’s co-founder, said in an interview. “We are committed to working things out and finding an equitable solution for all our constituent.”

The nearly decade-old hedge fund, which was started by former schoolmates and Wall Street currency traders Su Zhu and Mr. Davies, had roughly $3 billion in assets under management in April this year.

That was shortly before a sudden collapse in the values of TerraUSD, a so-called algorithmic stablecoin, and its sister token, Luna, in mid-May.
[...]

trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy

Malloc Voidstar posted:

Crypto Hedge Fund Three Arrows Capital Considers Asset Sales, Bailout


Who could have seen this coming?

And how too.

evilweasel
Aug 24, 2002

Malloc Voidstar posted:

“We have always been believers in crypto and we still are,” Kyle Davies, Three Arrows’s co-founder, said in an interview. “We are committed to working things out and finding an equitable solution for all our constituent.”

i really appreciate the Freudian slip here

"we're busy figuring out how to make this work out for the only person i care about, me"

Mercury_Storm
Jun 12, 2003

*chomp chomp chomp*
Kind of interesting how all these ponzis are now hiring legal people to help them get out instead of just loving bailing like in the past, A.K.A. "abscond with the reserve funds" like in the Tether whitepaper lol

post hole digger
Mar 21, 2011

Mercury_Storm posted:

Kind of interesting how all these ponzis are now hiring legal people to help them get out instead of just loving bailing like in the past, A.K.A. "abscond with the reserve funds" like in the Tether whitepaper lol



did you make that screenshot in mspaint with font antialiasing turned off

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Mercury_Storm
Jun 12, 2003

*chomp chomp chomp*
try checking the image source

https://www.reddit.com/r/Buttcoin/comments/unvv9x/from_the_tether_white_paper/

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