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Krispy Kareem posted:But Godless heathens that never actually killed anyone, since Cain was supposed to represent the first murderer. Thereby separating morality from religion Actually, Lott offering up his daughters to the slavering rape hoard would probably fit well with his ideology. Same with his wife getting turned to salt. Lott getting date raped by his daughters though? That'll get skipped over.
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Jul 23, 2015 18:12
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It's sad when you think about how the Duggars could have dugged 9/11, and people probably would have defended them.
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Jul 23, 2015 18:23
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"It was an honest mistake, Josh didn't mean to crash into the twin towers"
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Jul 23, 2015 18:24
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Krispy Kareem posted:I'm going to wager Jim Bob skips the Lott stories at the evening Bible study, though. I wonder if that would have been before or after Josh's "youthful discretions" with his sisters... Geoj fucked around with this message at 19:25 on Jul 23, 2015 |
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Jul 23, 2015 18:35
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DaveSplitter posted:"It was an honest mistake, Josh didn't mean to crash into the twin towers" It happened years ago and he went through specious therapy. Sure he wasn't punished by the law due to actions of family and friends, but don't you think those people that survived the tower collapse have suffered enough? Why reopen old wounds over ancient history?
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Jul 23, 2015 19:21
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Krispy Kareem posted:But Godless heathens that never actually killed anyone, since Cain was supposed to represent the first murderer. Thereby separating morality from religion No, I think you'll find that the story of the guy that has freaky drunk sex with his daughters is one of Jim Bob's favorites
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Jul 23, 2015 19:31
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Krispy Kareem posted:When everyone has a lifespan of 900+ years it's easier to work out the logic. isn't this a misinterpretation but modern religious fanatics are too stupid to realize that a "year" by early biblical definition is actually a single lunar cycle that's only like in the low to mid 70s, which isn't that unrealistic to imagine that a couple people would live that long even though they were all shitfarmers Fur20 fucked around with this message at 19:51 on Jul 23, 2015 |
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Jul 23, 2015 19:47
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DaveSplitter posted:"It was an honest mistake, Josh didn't mean to crash into the twin towers" "Josh learned his lesson from crashing into the twin towers. We reported it to the local policeman and Josh went and built an outhouse as punishment"
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Jul 23, 2015 20:12
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it turns out the policeman had himself driven a truck bomb into a federal building
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Jul 24, 2015 00:56
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He didn't actually put bombs in the buildings, just touched them on the outside. Don't worry though, I hear its common in other conservative countries as well.
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Jul 24, 2015 02:32
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The cultures around the Jews at the time also had a practice of stating the lives of kings and great mean as silly long to show their power. Dude might have only lived to 45 but they put him down for a glorious 10,000 year reign.
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Jul 24, 2015 02:42
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Did anyone make like a True Detective thing about the Duggars? Seems like a good parody opportunity.
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Jul 24, 2015 02:49
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jim fuel can't melt steel bobs
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Jul 24, 2015 03:10
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The White Dragon posted:isn't this a misinterpretation but modern religious fanatics are too stupid to realize that a "year" by early biblical definition is actually a single lunar cycle I always figured it was because record keeping wasn't great and they didn't have enough begots and begats to fill in all 4k years so suddenly everyone lived really really long times. I've heard a theory that all the water from Noah's flood was from the protective layer that surrounded the Earth after it's creation. With that layer gone, harmful rays from the sun shortened our lifespans to the more reasonable 120 years. I have no idea when 120 years was settled upon, but it is a little interesting to note cell reproduction and degeneration limits puts the maximum human lifespan at around 125 years.
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Jul 24, 2015 15:07
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Jack Gladney posted:Did anyone make like a True Detective thing about the Duggars? Seems like a good parody opportunity. Sounds more like a Law and Order: SVU episode.
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Jul 24, 2015 15:44
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Krispy Kareem posted:I always figured it was because record keeping wasn't great and they didn't have enough begots and begats to fill in all 4k years so suddenly everyone lived really really long times. Are there people that did/currently believe this?
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Jul 24, 2015 15:49
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Captain Yossarian posted:Are there people that did/currently believe this? Ya thats like a super vanilla christian fundy way to explain the flood and poo poo
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Jul 24, 2015 16:03
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Yup. I learned that poo poo in Sunday school.
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Jul 24, 2015 16:15
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Pvt.Scott posted:Yup. I learned that poo poo in Sunday school. Huh, I learned something today.. god bles.
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Jul 24, 2015 16:18
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Krispy Kareem posted:I always figured it was because record keeping wasn't great and they didn't have enough begots and begats to fill in all 4k years so suddenly everyone lived really really long times. There are a lot of good YT videos showing how this would be impossible. And there are so many contradictions in the noah's ark story its hilarious that people believe it happened.
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Jul 24, 2015 16:34
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happyhippy posted:There are a lot of good YT videos showing how this would be impossible. Everyone remembers the animals getting loaded on two by two, but that was only for unclean beasts, (inedible or prohibited animals) everything else was seven by seven. Fourteen fuckin cows, doves, sheep, chickens, goats, horses, turtles, tortoises etc. most ark size estimates I've seen ignore this detail.
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Jul 24, 2015 17:53
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When I was a kid a guy came to our church and did a whole flood presentation thing with a scale model and everything. This was where I first heard about the layer of water atmosphere (and because it's gone we live shorter lives and girls get their periods earlier), and also that the craters on the moon are from when God and the devil had an epic rock-throwing battle. God hates rocks.
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Jul 24, 2015 18:27
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Pvt.Scott posted:Yup. I learned that poo poo in Sunday school. Man, my Sunday school sucked. All they taught us to do was to contemplate the Spooky Stations of the Cross Mysteries
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Jul 24, 2015 20:25
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ElGroucho posted:Man, my Sunday school sucked. All they taught us to do was to contemplate the Spooky Stations of the Cross Mysteries Well, that's what you get for being a hell-bound, Mary worshipping papist. Radical Protestant offshoots are where the true Christians live under constant siege for having the Truth. Or maybe you were Lutheran. Catholic Lite. If so, you're cool cause you don't worship Mary and the pope.
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Jul 25, 2015 06:22
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Jul 28, 2015 14:54
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Jam Bab
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Jul 30, 2015 08:57
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Only people from my church go to heaven
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Jul 30, 2015 09:42
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My Little Jim Bob: Duggaring Is Magic
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Jul 30, 2015 12:20
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It has come to this, begging quote:According to a report, the Duggars lost their $45,000-per-episode paychecks along with endorsement deals, sponsorships, speaking engagements and royalties, which could amount to a “$25 million or more a year” loss in total. http://okmagazine.com/photos/duggar-broke-money-19-kids-cancelled-lose-donate/photo/1001289578/
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Jul 30, 2015 14:48
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Nothing you're taught in Sunday School holds up if you think about it for more than 5 seconds. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufm2fJDk-0I
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Jul 30, 2015 15:07
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Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:It has come to this, begging  by those estimates (6 years @ $25 million/year) they've squandered a $125 million fortune. Maybe we'll get a followup "where are they now" episode in 5-10 years, with the entire family living in squalor after having to sell their compound and move into a couple of triple-wides at a trailer park while living on government assistance 
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Jul 30, 2015 16:05
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Geoj posted:
At least they can park the trailers at their used car lot. Doesn't Jim Bob own a bunch of small businesses? The TV show money was just gravy.
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Jul 30, 2015 16:16
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The funny thing is that the conversations in the Duggar household in the last couple months would have made the best television ever.
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Jul 30, 2015 16:24
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Geoj posted:
They've got money. It sounds like they're petitioning for church donations. The Duggars run their own ministry and I'm going to guess if you arranged the payroll in alphabetical order there'd be a fuckton of D names. They just don't want to get real jobs. And hey, the kind of prayer that prays gay away doesn't come cheap.
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Jul 30, 2015 16:36
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Geoj posted:
Oh but they COULDN'T do that! Welfare is for *horrified whisper* the coloreds! *scarechord*
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Jul 30, 2015 16:39
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Ultimate Mango posted:At least they can park the trailers at their used car lot.
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Jul 30, 2015 16:40
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Krispy Kareem posted:They've got money. It sounds like they're petitioning for church donations. Begging for money online so you can make low-effort youtube videos doesn't come off as the actions of the financially stable. Astrofig posted:Oh but they COULDN'T do that! Welfare is for *horrified whisper* the coloreds! *scarechord* You don't think that a family that hand-waved away literal child rape would have a problem twisting themselves into pretzels to justify why government assistance is OK in their specific case but wrong for everyone else? Geoj fucked around with this message at 17:22 on Jul 30, 2015 |
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Jul 30, 2015 16:44
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Don't forget that they believe god tasked them with going on television to witness to the masses. They think the show made them look good and that it helped them win converts.
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Jul 30, 2015 16:52
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Jul 30, 2015 17:02
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Have not read last 125 pages of the thread but did anyone say: looks like those whores got Duggared?!
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Jul 30, 2015 17:18
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