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lmao Luke is such a goober, also the first time I think reality TV editing has been used so hilariously
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Jan 26, 2015 03:21
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DumbWhiteGuy posted:Chris Leben to tell all in new book. This and the first Forrest book are the first two installments of the PSPMMA Book Club. We will not be reading the Matt Hughes Autobiography. Bonus points for Jenna Jameson videos if you can relate them to Tito!
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Jan 26, 2015 03:59
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please read tank abbott's book 'bar brawler: befor [sic] there were rules' for the book club tia
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Jan 26, 2015 04:16
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If you didn't think Cort's Kimbo video was funny, I don't know how you work. Can someone get Mobn back? Or link his thread from when we supported him in his endeavor to get hurt by a moon man in a tournament?
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Jan 26, 2015 04:19
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Captain Log posted:If you didn't think Cort's Kimbo video was funny, I don't know how you work. haha yes his tournament was awesome. Mobn please return.
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Jan 26, 2015 04:35
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Neurosis posted:please read tank abbott's book 'bar brawler: befor [sic] there were rules' for the book club tia I read it, I am upset the next two books aren't out yet.
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Jan 26, 2015 04:58
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LobsterMobster posted:I read it, I am upset the next two books aren't out yet. Didn't realise it wasn't a biography quote:Walter Foxx, Happening Beach, California’s most feared bar brawler, works at Sea Lion Beach Liquor at night, attends Wong Beach State College in the day, and dishes out street justice in his spare time to the scumbags, posers, wannabes, and bullies of the world who violate his personal code of honor. Driving a 1987 Chevy Sprint with his faithful pit bull Adolf riding shotgun, Walter and his twisted crew of Poppa Chulo, Rolando, Big Cal, and Gonzo hold court at the Dead Grunion bar where they take on all comers. When Walter sees a man beating his girlfriend one night and steps in to assist her, he gets punched for his trouble and makes the perp pay. The man has friends in high places, though, and Walter soon finds himself facing felony assault charges that his 600 pound bench-press-fueled fighting skills alone can’t beat. As he battles liars on the stand and his own hapless attorney John Wittless in a desperate bid to clear his name and avoid prison, Walter struggles to understand what his life means and what his future holds. Author David "Tank" Abbott, the “Huntington Beach Bad Boy” and the world’s most famous brawler, had over 200 street fights before bursting onto the MMA scene in 1995 when he shocked the world by defeating larger opponents with crushing ferocity inside the cage to become a household name. He later went on to star in the most watched “Friends” episode of all time before becoming a fixture at Ted Turner’s World Championship Wrestling where he quickly became one of its most recognizable and popular personalities. He later returned to the cage with his trademark intensity, leaving an indelible and enduring legacy. This seminal three-novel work chronicles the adventures of fictional character Walter Foxx, who is at the crossroads of his life and who navigates the harsh worlds of bar brawling and street fighting with the goal of living his dream and following his passion and someday becoming a no-holds-barred fighter. Written from the ultimate insider’s perspective, Tank Abbott takes readers from the parking lot to the cage with a realism and honesty about mixed martial arts never before told or exposed − until now!
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Jan 26, 2015 05:01
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If someone posted that novel, sentence by sentence, with one post per sentence so that it was the only thing in the thread for the next 300 pages, I would rather read that than CortXBomb's posts.
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Jan 26, 2015 05:21
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Captain Log posted:If you didn't think Cort's Kimbo video was funny, I don't know how you work. mobn sadly asphyxiated while having sex under his 400 pound wife
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Jan 26, 2015 05:47
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"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on" is an amazing sentence and I'm shocked that Tank could come up with it
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Jan 26, 2015 05:51
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Not entirely sure what brought on the cortx videos, but lol.
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Jan 26, 2015 05:53
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nws nms seriously don't click this Bobby Green http://imgur.com/sBefkym
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Jan 26, 2015 06:15
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Fozzy The Bear posted:nws nms The hell am I even looking at? Is that a shitton of sutures to reattach a mustle or some form of localized rot or whatever?
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Jan 26, 2015 06:21
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Duzzy Funlop posted:The hell am I even looking at? He has a torn quad right? I think those are stitches to reattach it?
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Jan 26, 2015 06:25
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Did Bobby finally get shot?
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Jan 26, 2015 06:25
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Fozzy The Bear posted:nws nms Pft, don't be a bitch, modern medicine is cool.
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Jan 26, 2015 07:06
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vainman posted:"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on" is an amazing sentence and I'm shocked that Tank could come up with it 'the judge was a blue blood, the kind that had read a thousand books but never lived a page in her life' OOOOOOHHHHH
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Jan 26, 2015 07:52
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Driving a 1987 Chevy Sprint with his faithful pit bull Adolf riding shotgun, Walter and his twisted crew of Poppa Chulo, Rolando, Big Cal, and Gonzo hold court at the Dead Grunion bar where they take on all comers Put this on my tombstone
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Jan 26, 2015 08:09
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that crew is known as 'KAOS' fyi
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Jan 26, 2015 08:11
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Fozzy The Bear posted:nws nms Jesus christ.
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Jan 26, 2015 08:24
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That's not bad at all compared to the thread in GBS about a guy who set himself on fire
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Jan 26, 2015 08:25
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Detroit_Dogg posted:Driving a 1987 Chevy Sprint with his faithful pit bull Adolf riding shotgun, Walter and his twisted crew of Poppa Chulo, Rolando, Big Cal, and Gonzo hold court at the Dead Grunion bar where they take on all comers paging cortex bomb to record some dramatic readings of this good book preferably while dressed up like David 'Tank' Abbot (may require growing head hairs)  or i guess wearing a very bad wig
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Jan 26, 2015 12:36
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every time I saw that picture before now I thought it was a larping wizard wearing a skullcap
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Jan 26, 2015 12:49
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ceaselessfuture posted:every time I saw that picture before now I thought it was a larping wizard wearing a skullcap Same http://www.mmafighting.com/2015/1/25/7868155/tj-dillashaw-urijah-faber-team-alpha-male-mma-news TJ doesn't want to have to kick Faber's rear end, so noble. Please Dominick stop being injured for five minutes and murder him for me.
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Jan 26, 2015 13:02
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THE BUTT MAN posted:paging cortex bomb to record some dramatic readings of this good book preferably while dressed up like David 'Tank' Abbot (may require growing head hairs) Can not grow that amount of head hairs. Call me when you need a Hulk Hogan impersonator. I could rock a skullet. I doubt it would be as silky as Hogan's though. I think that's Tank's real hair for some reason. I believe it. I can however perform the Tank Abbot taunt after I Matua manyak 
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Jan 26, 2015 13:33
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I thought Tank Abbott in the pic was Brian Blessed
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Jan 26, 2015 13:46
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In BAR BRAWLER, not-Tank watches the very first not-UFC, which he believes is another bullshit pro wrestling PPV until not-Gerard Gordeau kicks the teeth out of not-Teila Tuli's face Then some Mexican dude in pajamas named Garcia wins the whole drat thing
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Jan 26, 2015 13:53
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TANK ABBOT I've sworn to non-violent methods now. Please let me in peace. NOOB AT BAR Oh So you're saying you're pussy and I won the fight via ring countout because you left the ring to not fight me and were counted out and now I'm the baddest rear end in USA? TANK ABBOT (Internally we see the go button being pressed and the fight clutch going into 5th gear as the rear end kicking truck revs up and drives down the strip to Buttsmash Blvd.) Kid You've awoken the Kraken and I'm going sing you some fist music.
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Jan 26, 2015 14:00
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LobsterMobster posted:In BAR BRAWLER, not-Tank watches the very first not-UFC, which he believes is another bullshit pro wrestling PPV until not-Gerard Gordeau kicks the teeth out of not-Teila Tuli's face Having read excerpts, Tank's writing style is way similar to The Turner Diaries.
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Jan 26, 2015 14:51
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I hate to be the bearer of real life but you guys know it's super unlikely that Tank Abbott wrote that book without heavy assistance, right?
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Jan 26, 2015 15:23
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Bluedeanie posted:I hate to be the bearer of real life but you guys know it's super unlikely that Tank Abbott wrote that book without heavy assistance, right? You realize there's a mispelling in the goddamn title of the book right? e: excuse me, title of the trilogy
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Jan 26, 2015 15:28
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Who Gotch Ya posted:Only if they kiss too. This is how I envisioned my podcast with JT would end up looking, I am glad it didn't.
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Jan 26, 2015 15:38
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Bluedeanie posted:I hate to be the bearer of real life but you guys know it's super unlikely that Tank Abbott wrote that book without heavy assistance, right? He wrote it & please don't throw unfounded insults at tank abbot per the new punch sport rules.
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Jan 26, 2015 15:40
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Bluedeanie posted:I hate to be the bearer of real life but you guys know it's super unlikely that Tank Abbott wrote that book without heavy assistance, right? If by assistance, you mean gallons of vodka, yeah. If you mean another human helped him, there are way too many spelling mistakes to think an editor of any merit was involved.
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Jan 26, 2015 15:41
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i keep laughing at his faithful pitbull, Adolf
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Jan 26, 2015 15:50
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Triticum Guzzler posted:i keep laughing at his faithful pitbull, Adolf HITLER DOG
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Jan 26, 2015 16:03
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ceaselessfuture posted:every time I saw that picture before now I thought it was a larping wizard wearing a skullcap I honestly thought LobsterMobster had photoshopped Michael Bisping's hair onto Tank's head.
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Jan 26, 2015 17:53
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LobsterMobster posted:HITLER DOG Luftebarker.
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Jan 26, 2015 17:54
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Trast posted:Luftebarker. Woof-twaffe
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Jan 26, 2015 17:57
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Canein
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Jan 26, 2015 18:32
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