Evil Willow posted:

AITA for thinking my MOH should spend the day before my wedding with me?

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for thinking my MOH should spend the day before my wedding with me?

quote:

OP: My parents aren't so great for planning, my mum especially so. My other brideamaids have fallen a bit short in my expectations tbh so I can't give them more responsibility, and as for my other friends, I don't trust anyone to do it right or not to blab my wedding secrets.

evilshenanigan
Wait….wedding secrets? Will you have an evil twin reveal at the ceremony? Will a mystery be solved? Is there a scavenger hunt to find the wedding rings? What in the world are your “wedding secrets”?

OP
My wedding colours, the first dance song, the bridesmaid dance, what my dress looks like - the usual things.

MadelynnSienna
Firstly, no one cares about that stuff besides you, your fiancee and maybe both sets of parents. Secondly, what on earth is a bridesmaid dance? And why is it so important that your other bridesmaids cannot know - cause that sounds counter-intuitive.

OP
The dance I want the bridesmaids to do? I've seen few on tiktok and I like the idea. The other bridesmaids can know but they can't carry out the plans for me.

leafyrebecca
YTA for many, many reasons, but even if I only knew this fact, YTA.

quote:

I'm a 17F and I'm a lesbian. I've known since I was 13. I came out to my mother the same year, and she was supportive. She basically said "I don't care who you date, I just care you're in a happy, healthy relationship" and I asked her not to tell my dad till I was ready.

I love my dad but he has some...questionable views. He's never said anything outright bigoted but he constantly complains about women and how we're overdramatic and talk a lot, and he made a pretty rear end in a top hat comment about a flamboyant friend of mine. He said something along the lines of "I bet his dads real proud of him" very sarcastically. When I told him my friends dad was dead, he responded "Lucky guy". I've also seen him argue about politics with one of my aunts (aunt 'Malissa' as she's important later) and he leans more toward conservative. Not exactly conservative but enough for me to not trust him.

For these reasons I was really hesitant to come out to my dad. I came out last year and he has been really dismissive toward my sexuality. He thinks its just a phase and that "no gay couple stays together for life". He literally refuses to acknowledge it, and has been kinda distant toward me. He got upset when he saw my wallpaper of two girls holding hands and made a comment about it to my brother I'm not comfortable repeating.

Most of my family knows by now. The only ones who don't are so distant its not worth even telling them. We get together every year for new years, and like usual dad starts something with either Aunt Malissa or some other member of my family. This year he decided to complain about video games and the internet ruining this generation and making us all lazy. He made a comment like "the internet has made my kid think she's a drat [slur]!" And just like that I was dragged into the argument. I tried to escape but my dad apparently had a lot to say and kept bringing up how he didn't think I was actually a lesbian and that it was all video games and the internets fault.

to Aunt Malissa's credit, she stood up for me and so did her husband (my uncle) but the argument was getting more and more heated and he kept dropping slurs. I got so fed up I just screamed "DAD I LIKE BOOBIES AND I LIKE WOMEN" so loud I could hear my uncles and cousins on the porch burst out laughing. My dad stood stunned since I don't usually raise my voice, ever. Aunt Malissa did her best to not laugh but ended up laughing anyways. A few of my older family members stared in awe but for the most part my family found it funny and spent the rest of the party teasing my dad. My dad was so mad he went upstairs to my parents room for the rest of the party and sulked.

After the party was over my dad grew very cold toward me and kept saying how much I humiliated him and my brother said I shouldn't have said that and it was really inappropriate. My moms been quiet on the matter.

So I come to you reddit, am i the rear end in a top hat?

Batterypowered7 posted:

And the sisters, since they seem to agree.

atomicdream posted:

AITA for shouting "I like boobies and I like women!" At our new years party?

This girl is my hero.

atomicdream posted:

AITA for shouting "I like boobies and I like women!" At our new years party?

This girl is my hero.

Absurd Alhazred posted:

Time to spend a lot more time with Aunt Malissa.

Involuntary Sparkle posted:

AITA for being upset that my family didn’t get my kids Christmas presents?

Involuntary Sparkle posted:

AITA for being upset that my family didn’t get my kids Christmas presents?

Bored posted:

They had an intern working on naughty_nice.xls and he forgot to import some data.

Barudak posted:

Ho ho ho, your nice deed count was improperly stored as a date!

MagusofStars posted:

r/relationships: DAD I LIKE BOOBIES AND I LIKE WOMEN

evilweasel posted:

the mom is the one who seems to have wanted to deliberately hurt the kids, the sisters could have not been aware that was mom's plan

quote:

My sister texted me the same thing and my other sister said that I’m playing the victim when the real victims are them and their kids.

Pomme de Terror posted:

AITA for skipping New Years Eve at my child free sisters?

Its well trained and overall okay for a dog, I just didn't want it at my house, or even my yard.

Batterypowered7 posted:

quote:

Okay so I've always had issues with time and clocks and they make me really upset to the point that I don't do anything apart from fixate on them and what time it is.

I've developed ways of dealing with it over the years and avoid having a clock visible on my computer etc. And hourglasses to help with tasks. I'm very very fortunate to have an artistic career with few necessary clock related appointments, and the people I work with are very undestanding but it's very difficult to live your life without knowing the time and it's been very difficult working out how to cope as I get very tempted. My partner who I've been with for many years now has always been fairly understanding although I can't say ever really truly appreciated the magnitude of what it was I dealt with.

The big issue has arisen because I wanted to try for the new year a new way of dealing with my issues and to remove clocks entirely from my home so that I won't get sucked into a time spiral. The idea is that I will expand my use of the hourglass system and live my life completely by the sands and natural daylight cycles. I'm aware that to most this will sound bizarre and unorthodox but this is something I've dealt with and have lost so many days of my life to and I'm lucky enough to be able to attempt this outside of formal medical appointments etc.

My partner is really upset that I am in her mind taking over the whole home and forcing this onto her, but I can't see how this is such a big problem as she will still have her phone and her computer and the difference it is going to make to my life not being tempted to look at the time is hopefully going to be huge. Am I wrong here and is what I'm asking a far bigger deal than I expected? She's not taken her clock down yet and says that I'm an rear end in a top hat for needing her to.

Edit:

A lot of people are saying that I should go and seek professional help. I have dealt with this issue for a long time in my life and have spoken to people who have helped with my anxiety but not with this issue. It's very difficult to access specialist support here and I have had to come up with my own systems with hourglasses, planning around sunrise etc. And I know that this is unorthodox and I am very lucky to be able to cope this way but it helps me a lot and has changed my life. This is why I want to expand and make my home a safer place.

I appreciate people trying to help but gently want to remind people that my post isn't about whether I can seek support and it's about whether I have underestimated the importance of clocks to people and if I am being unreasonable to want to have visible time in my home tracked by only sand and daylight hours

Antioch posted:

nashona posted:

Like sands through the hourglass...



AITA for making my home more clock accessible even if it upsets my partner

nashona posted:

Like sands through the hourglass...



AITA for making my home more clock accessible even if it upsets my partner

nashona posted:

Like sands through the hourglass...


AITA for making my home more clock accessible even if it upsets my partner

mind the walrus posted:

This is 1000% some trust fund "I've never had a real problem" poo poo.

Only wealthy brats have this cross-section of total, unshakable confidence in their insanity along with a support network that either indulges them or is immediately shut out.

Captain Hygiene posted:

r/relationships: A lot of people are saying that I should go and seek professional help

mind the walrus posted:

Another for the "do you know how hard you have to work to make me dislike the working class people?" pile

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Especially at the age when you can buy dollar store crap for kids and they will adore it. Hell, some of my favourite childhood toys are stuff that was cheap and I knew it was cheap. Maybe because of that, you know it's expendable and can play rough.

But of course, that's not the point. The cruelty is the point. Making a kid cry on Christmas gets you sent drifting on an ice floe.

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Especially at the age when you can buy dollar store crap for kids and they will adore it. Hell, some of my favourite childhood toys are stuff that was cheap and I knew it was cheap. Maybe because of that, you know it's expendable and can play rough.

But of course, that's not the point. The cruelty is the point. Making a kid cry on Christmas gets you sent drifting on an ice floe.

Blue Moonlight posted:

1 24-HR DAY ROTATION IS DEADLY ERRONEOUS.

BrigadierSensible posted:

Just as not doing the "There are toys under this tree for all the GOOD children, and nothing for BAD children" speech when they knew there was going to be no toys for those kids would ahve avoided the whole mess.

It was intentionally designed to spite OP and her kids, (the present denier's grandchildren it must not be forgotten), out of reasons of jealousy and pettiness.

nashona posted:

Like sands through the hourglass...


AITA for making my home more clock accessible even if it upsets my partner

Serephina posted:

DST isn't an issue, but the appointment things are interesting to me. Do you just like, set an alarm an hour beforehand so you can get ready? And then never look at the alarm clock? Or just take your best guess at when 3pm is and show up early?

Pirate Radar posted:

I think a lot of people itt would be unsettled if we were suddenly given perfect knowledge of how many redditors are posting after receiving professional help, not before. Hourglass lover might be operating from a place of peak health and stability for all we know.

BrigadierSensible posted:

It's all made worse when there are so many ways it could have been avoided.

A word in the mums ear beforehand saying "We aren't getting your kids anything this year coz they get enough from your rich in laws." is mean and petty, but could have been arranged in a way to avoid making kids cry, whilst still getting the point across.

Just as not doing the "There are toys under this tree for all the GOOD children, and nothing for BAD children" speech when they knew there was going to be no toys for those kids would ahve avoided the whole mess.

It was intentionally designed to spite OP and her kids, (the present denier's grandchildren it must not be forgotten), out of reasons of jealousy and pettiness.

Runcible Cat posted:

My bet? Partner deals with all that for them.