Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

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Pratt2112: Mar 25, 2016; Indeeeeeeeeeed...

Sunswipe posted:

"Uh, Mr Roberts? My vaccuum cleaner's full and the guy who trained me never explained how to empty it before he ran screaming from the building."
"Uh, that is, you just, well buy a new one. Eeeh, the backers umm will never know. poo poo, I've knocked him out with my flailing arms. BEN! Send another memo warning employees not to stand too close to me."

lol!

# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:48

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# ? Jun 16, 2024 09:42

Sperglord: Feb 6, 2016

Scruffpuff posted:

It would also be awesome, and totally in line with the history of the project. Really, all theories that end in CIG failing are valid, when you get right down to it.

Ha, very true! CIG is the quantum mechanically failing game company. All the failures at the same time.
New Title:
Star Citizen - Schroedinger's Failure, Failing in All the Ways at the Same Time

Or:
Star Citizen - A Superposition of All Failures

# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:51

TheLastRoboKy: May 2, 2009; Finishing the game with everyone else's continues

It's been said before but it bears repeating this thread seems to be the only thing that has involved CIG in some way and not gone down in a trail of smokey ruin.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:54

ideate: Aug 20, 2002

TheLastRoboKy posted:

It's been said before but it bears repeating this thread seems to be the only thing that has involved CIG in some way and not gone down in a trail of smokey ruin.

Not yet!

# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:55

Samizdata: May 14, 2007

Skellybones posted:

I would just like to point out that none of this art theft stuff would ever have come to light, if Sandi hadn't insisted on toting around her stunt double all week and confused goons into trying to figure out just where the hell that short-legged bobble head design came from.

Wait, which one is the stunt double (as if Sandi would need one, as she has weapons training and has mastered all martial arts since she was a little girl)? Sandi's the one with the helmet, right?

# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:56

Lime Tonics: Nov 7, 2015; by FactsAreUseless

Sometimes this thread gets me upset, but that's only because of the community of goodwill that SC promotes. It usually goes away after a few cat pics are posted, or the whole photoshop game thing, <insert next gently caress up here> happens though.

This thread is good.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:57

SomethingJones: Mar 6, 2016; <3

ideate posted:

Or a completely different engine, and ER is the only one who could begin to approach the subject.

Would explain eightace 2021 date.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:00

Pratt2112: Mar 25, 2016; Indeeeeeeeeeed...

intardnation posted:

everyone knows that a real artist is one that can reproduce other works without others spotting the difference. Originality is overrated.

One I've heard is:
"Creativity is forgetting where you stole it from"

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:02

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

SomethingJones posted:

Would explain eightace 2021 date.

Crazy rear end thing is probably 80% of the backers would lap that up. So they are changing engine...big deal. I'd rather it get done right with them taking their time to meet CR's vision.
yada yada

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:05

hakimashou: Jul 15, 2002; Upset Trowel

Would you believe it was only Jan 6th

A Typical Star Citizen posted:

In the last 500 years, the Fourth Stimpire has dominated four systems, which it has united into one starzone, Stimsis. The Fourth Stimpire has origins from the Ten Empire War in which 10 of the United Stimpires revolted against each rules. All empires except for the fourth swore freedom upon their citizens. There is no free speech in the Fourth Stimpire, and all self-controlled transportation has been made illegal without undergoing painful medical verification methods, in which arteries are severed without pain resistant, operated entirely by machines. The way they work claim to be the most hygenic and healthy way possible, but these machines often rub against pain points, causing great deals of pain to patients. The heart is then extracted from the body and placed into a glass grinding machine. Various energy centers are also dissected and replaced with dangerous transplants. After the painful, 52 hour surgical procedure, patients will then have to use a fused guidance tool, which pumps painful resistors into the body every 2 hours. The pain they have caused is so bad, the victim would freeze in a tense position. They would then collapse afterwards.

Sexual stimulation in any way within the grounds of the Fourth Stimpire is strictly prohibited, and anyone detected even touching their sexual organs will be subjected to a penectomy or if the offender was a female, they would then have a razor inserted into their ovaries. They would pump a blue solution into the womb until the stitchings burst. Offenders would also be forced to show their operated areas in public, and they would always harass and punch them to a pulp, against their will.

Otherwise, offenders would be tazed with the worst type of electricity in the systematic district, causing so much pain, the victim would scream and flail in madness. The pain would also triple every second, but no death would be incurred. This is also used in combat against enemy units, which is why all UEE forces must wear the upgraded suit to block this effect.

However, enertainment is also questionable in UEE grounds. Sporting events end with the losing team being rounded into a grinder and shredded on live television, boxing matches end with the loser having their hands removed without anasthesia, flight races would end with the losers having their arms and legs removed, then being injected with insanity, for entertainment. People are also forced into these events, by undergoing a painful 127 hour procedure which involves tweaking the muscles so they will not listen to brain commands, and then having a painful drug injected which also causes madness if the player is not sporting. This is all for entertainment, and anyone not watching any of it during sporting times and cheering for the winning team, they will be imprisoned into galactic camps.

Snuff films are also broadcast, and actors are actually murdered just for entertainment. Stealth droids also guide these forced actors into behaving exactly as the director dreams, otherwise they will be punished by being placed into a macerator and having their execution written into the film. Any film that does not feature someone being murdered will be burned and the entire crew behind it will be executed in the most grotesque way possible - vivisection.

All executions are broadcast, and anyone who misses even a millisecond, even by blinking, will be executed. All citizens must boo to the person being executed, and the family is gathered to be injected with eternators, which cause pain forever, making them immoral but feeling the pain tenfold every millisecond. They cannot pass out, but they will feel like it forever.

Conquests by this Stimpire end in the planet being razed, and all the citizens being executed in the same way as their citizens are. The planet is then destroyed and all remnants of it are removed, and any memories of it will be erased instantly from civil minds. People who are also killed are also erased from memories, and all memories of them, including toys and pictures, are destroyed.

Prisoners undergo 40,000 years of relentless and endless labor, and anyone not complying is sentenced to the eternator injection. All prisoners injected with eternators are placed into capsules and launched into far space, then the room is closed tight to ensure maximum insanity. Some prisoners are also subjected to the removal of blood, the lungs, the liver, the genitals, the skeleton, the muscles, the eyes, and even the injection of pressure. Prisoners sentenced to pressure chambers are locked in until they are inflated to a high level. The decompression is then stopped to make sure they are inflated and uncomfortable.

Children born on the 14th of July are subjected to the removal of their skeleton and an implant of a silver liquid to replace it. The nervous sysem is also injected in various parts to ensure it is five times more sensitive than the average.

Restaurants also are ordered to serve civil meat, and anyone attending must give themself up to be cooked into a grotesque meal. They are cooked alive, undergoing extreme pain, and are then subjected to industrial grinders and blenders. The Stimpire orders at least 1 million citizens to be dispatched every day, as they are afraid the population may overthrow them. But only one planet is cared for, and the rest are banned from eating, drinking, talking, using technology, touching anyone, wearing unauthorized clothes, touching buildings, or walking a centimeter out of designated routes. Civil enforcers are on every planet, and they are engineered so that they are 40 times larger than the 300 quadrillion population. At least 7 billion die every 12 hours under this rule.

Thoughts are also surveyed, and anyone who does not think anything to loving the Stimpire with more than their capabilities will be sentenced to a prison. Prisoners who are punished for this violation will meet their greatest fear, only to have it amplified so they will turn insane as they imagine it exactly as they fear it. They then undergo a painful extraction of all fluids, to be replaced by a toxin which causes permanent irritation. The unknown substance keeps the subject aging normally, except they will never die. Prisoners punished in this way are unable to be reverted, despite many efforts, and they will never be able to be disposed.

The sickening truths have been revealed only today, and invigilation teams are still investigating the truths without setting foot in the galactic space of this sickening empire.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:07

Google Butt: Oct 4, 2005; Xenology is an unnatural mixture of science fiction and formal logic. At its core is a flawed assumption...

that an alien race would be psychologically human.

Mirificus posted:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/239709734/star-traders/comments?cursor=12872478#comment-12872477

ah yes, they parodied jessica biel, dnd, an various deviantart artists and background creators. ok.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:07

ideate: Aug 20, 2002

Google Butt posted:

ah yes, they parodied jessica biel, dnd, an various deviantart artists and background creators. ok.

he does have us on the comic effect thing

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:09

Skellybones: May 31, 2011; Fun Shoe

Omi-Polari posted:

I'm amazed at how you guys even discovered that.

It was as simple as doing a google reverse image search on a picture of Sandi next to her standee.

Google was able to correctly identify that it was Jessica Biel from Stealth.

Thanks Google.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:12

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

Skellybones posted:

It was as simple as doing a google reverse image search on a picture of Sandi next to her standee.

Google was able to correctly identify that it was Jessica Biel from Stealth.

Thanks Google.

Should be Goongle. Google is hampering the development of SC.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:14

Vincent Van Goatse: Nov 8, 2006; Enjoy every sandwich.; Smellrose

Is Croberts hurriedly packing cash into a suitcase yet?

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:17

D1E: Nov 25, 2001

boviscopophobic posted:

So 0.16% of the nominal citizen population (or, 2125 individuals) contributes something like 8-15% of CIG's total revenues, at an average buyin of roughly $4k-$8k.

Congratulations MoMA! This is concrete proof of what your mommy told you: you really are "special"!

(Note: I deliberately put the exclamation point outside of the quotation marks to trigger you)

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:28

Tortolia: Dec 29, 2005; Hindustan Electronics Employee of the Month, July 2008; Grimey Drawer

This has been a hell of a day in the SC thread. Thanks for the entertainment, commandos o9

My favorite part of Pgabz's adventures in 2.3 was the clunky spinning turret. How the gently caress does that happen?

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:31

Tokamak: Dec 22, 2004

alf_pogs posted:

who wants to pony up the last $7k for star traders to hit their funding goal

You know full well that this thing is going to reach its goal by a last minute mystery donor.

Expect to see the Star Traders module being sold for $50. Which includes 4k stolen art assets, Boardmatch and SATAdice multiplayer modes. Expect to see it shortly after Star Marine's matchmaking and grabby hands are in the baby-PU.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:31

Google Butt: Oct 4, 2005; Xenology is an unnatural mixture of science fiction and formal logic. At its core is a flawed assumption...

that an alien race would be psychologically human.

hey person being paid to read this thread:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tE7XxrZagg0

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:33

D1E: Nov 25, 2001

Star Citizen: Baby's First PU

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:34

SomethingJones: Mar 6, 2016; <3

Colostomy Bag posted:

Should be Goongle.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:40

Mirificus: Oct 29, 2004; Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

Completionist [$15000+]

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:44

fuctifino: Jun 11, 2001; by Fluffdaddy

e: Just went back a few pages and noticed it was already posted. This thread is hard to keep up with. lol

fuctifino fucked around with this message at 06:57 on Mar 27, 2016

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:49

SomethingJones: Mar 6, 2016; <3

Mirificus posted:

Completionist [$15000+]

I wish those guys would realise that posting on that forum gets them nowhere. They really ought to be posting in this thread.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:49

G0RF: Mar 19, 2015; Some galactic defender you are, Space Cadet.

Sperglord posted:

Of course, we are assuming that Erin has full visibility to CIG finances. He is Robert's brother, but he isn't a member of the Chris Roberts / Ortwin duopoly. I can see Chris Roberts not wanting to level with Erin about the true state of the company, especially if Chris brought in Erin using a misleading depiction of Erin's new role.

Do we think that Erin likes being on a failing project with a delusional megalomaniac as a boss? What are the odds that Chris brought in Erin with promises of Chris giving Erin a leadership role and then, when Erin arrives, Chris never ceding the required authority? Wouldn't that fit Chris's personality as we know it? In this hypothetical situation, we shouldn't expect Erin to have the full picture, less Erin feel totally betrayed by Chris.

Too much speculation without corroborating evidence leads to :tinfoil:

territory. Lensed through the fatalism of this thread, we see clouds only vaguely shaped like mushrooms and immediately conclude an A Bomb was dropped.

It is simply a bridge too far to conclude Chris / Ortwin would purposely keep Erin in the dark about an imminent collapse. Erin of all people knows that Chris has gambled and often crapped out when he refused to rein in his worst scope creeping instincts because through Chris' historically myopic eyes they are his "boundless vision".

That Erin is in LA while Chris is in the UK is significant. Quite strange. It suggests NOT that CIG is, unbeknownst to Erin, running on fumes (why bring Erin closer to HQ in your absence if guys in HQ are keeping a cash crisis secret?) Instead, it is far more plausible to assume-- given the irregularity of this trip that Erin is "On A Secret Mission" agreed upon in advance with Chris. The possibilities are myriad, and include:

1) "Operation: Fraternal Vengeance" -- Erin is cleaning house in CIG LA. He is a bearer of bad news which Chris will conveniently be out of town for-- which will save Chris enormous personal awkwardness. (This could be targeted terminations, wholesale layoffs or other "wet work" long overdue.) This could be motivated by internal politics or financial pragmatism or both or other.

2) "The Freelancer Contingency" - Erin is meeting with the tech team in LA to communicate a new and reduced scope for game features, akin to the pragmatic paring of planned Freelancer features under Microsoft. Sooner or later, this is going to officially happen. The game can't be built as pitched and struggles to perform even 5% of its promised features in a map system that represents 1% of the promised deliverable. The Freelancer Contingency would be a massive writeoff of Engineering Debts-- and the official repudiation of Chris Roberts laundry list of superlative, scoop-creeping promises for what the BDSSE will be. (This too would be embarrassing for Chris-- particularly if it was met with cheers and applause, which it no doubt would be from guys like Sean, who have acknowledged the serious challenges they face.)

3) "Hello, Goodbye!" - Erin and possibly others are leaving "for personal reasons" but are meeting to communicate the new lines of communication between CIG LA's dev team and Foundry, along with reinforcing the criticality of absolute secrecy about the changes. (This would be a reassurance and continuity mission which would nevertheless strike fear in a lot of hearts, like a co-pilot on your commercial jet coming out of the cockpit with his parachute on, moving towards the exit and starting a conversation that includes lines like "you'll be in good hands" and "don't read too much into this"...)

3b - (Variations on a Theme) - An alternative version of the above sees a key dev leader of the Tony Z. variety departing. Erin is there to explain Continuity of Government procedures (with Foundry folks filling the gap), offer reassurances, and reiterate the importance of secrecy. (As they say in /StarCitizen "Loose Lips Might Sink Ships!)

4) "The Mission to Be Named Later" - All of the above are varying shades of dark while not true black. Yet consider the possibility that Erin's mission, while still strategic, is not nearly so dire as any of the above. WE MUST CONSIDER THIS POSSIBILITY because there is too much we do not know. It's possible the reason for his trip was to get the domestic dev heads in a room and talk through the detailed plans for Squadron 42 or to expand the roadmap for the PTU. It could be other strategic business of a non-alarming nature.

We know it's possible Derek knows the details through well-placed sources and he's laughing reading above because it's so off base. I'm not invested in any specific theories because we don't have enough info to really commit to one. It IS weird Erin is there while Chris is gone, that we do know. It's also true that the cash engine MAY have thrown a piston (though this remains to be fully proven.) Are these two things related? We don't know. Is something big afoot? Most likely. What could that be? Anything.

G0RF fucked around with this message at 07:09 on Mar 27, 2016

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:50

G0RF: Mar 19, 2015; Some galactic defender you are, Space Cadet.

Lime Tonics posted:

The "community" is still picking on this guy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cc7o-uDmvio

Hey, person reading this thread, get a better "community manager".

Jeffrey's last video was "Chemo #5"- in which he talks (with admirably bouyancy) about the side effects he's dealing with and delays caused by an unexpected cold. It's so infuriating to see spergs still picking on him for stating the obvious, and with much mirth.

:argh:

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:56

ZenMaster: Jan 24, 2006; I Saved PC Gaming

Dark Off posted:

The chris head is copied from painting thats in background of CIG streams

also:

i wonder who the mysterious last second 10k donator will be

I plan to be on this if I can and post links of the stolen art.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:59

SomethingJones: Mar 6, 2016; <3

ZenMaster posted:

I plan to be on this if I can and post links of the stolen art.

Twitch chat deletes links, no fun for you

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:02

robot roll call: Mar 7, 2006; dance dance dance dance dance to the radio

A friend asked me my opinion on Star Citizen today. I told him. I thought it looks like a janky piece of poo poo that will never formally release and he told me he spent 200 bucks and you can do so much in the alpha right now :gary:

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:06

LazyMaybe: Aug 18, 2013; oouagh

Jeffrey's a loving hero

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:08

SelenicMartian: Sep 14, 2013; Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

hakimashou posted:

hail satan

Heh...

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:09

A Neurotic Jew: Feb 17, 2012; by exmarx

robot roll call posted:

A friend asked me my opinion on Star Citizen today. I told him. I thought it looks like a janky piece of poo poo that will never formally release and he told me he spent 200 bucks and you can do so much in the alpha right now

be sure to tell him he has a small window to get a refund still!

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:11

BogDew: Jun 14, 2006; E:\FILES>quickfli clown.fli

The follower I know must have hit his head hard on something as a child.

quote:

Actually, this is EXACTLY why I put $1000 into Star Citizen. Because I wanted Wing Commander and Privateer to mate and have an epic monster of a baby. A massive MMO Space flight open world with a HUGE singleplayer storyline and interesting characters. AKA Wing Commander 2/3, with a Privateer mode. I love Chris Roberts' single player storylines. His romanticised Space Operas are gorgeous, fun, and frankly my number 1 gaming series.

I own Wing Commander 1, Secret Missions 1/2, Wing Commander 2, Special Operations 1/2, Wing Commander 3 DOS and PSX/Wing Commander 4 CD and DVD editions/Prophecy/Secret Operations, Kilrathi Saga, Super Wing Commander 3DO and Macintosh editions., Wing Commander Armada and Proving grounds, Wing Commander Academy. Even the freaking cartoon of Wing Commander Academy TV was awesome.

Chris Roberts is merely returning to his roots in gaming and making a freaking epic game. Remember Wing Commander 3 was 4 CDs long because of the cutscenes and Wing Commander IV was a mammoth 6 CDs long for the same reason. Wing Commander was always about giving players the most choices/options and detailed storylines with evolving growing characters that you cared about. If you didn't feel crushed when spirit plowed her fighter into the station her fiance was being held on then you weren't playing Wing Commander 1/2 correctly.

Also he's really...drowning in dunning-kruger.

quote:

As someone who previously made a game similar to Star Citizen, I can tell you that the modularised development model they are taking is the correct way to go. I also know that the individual ships they haven't implemented yet are not that important from a code sense.

They can afford to focus on the codebase first since they have professional artists working across the art assets. The biggest hurdle to making an MMO Space game with hundreds of systems and planetary terrain is art creation. Having around 10 studios and hundreds of artists makes that a lot easier. When we made VegaStrike our engine had planetary terrain, online play and over 500 star systems. But it had no good level editing tools and very little artwork for all those areas. I'm confident that Chris is going to get this right.

I think his role in VegaStrike was extracting sounds out of Privateer or something pretty peripheral that he's claiming a bigger stake in.
His main comeback for Elite is that it doesn't run on Linux.

I'm really curious to see his look when this collapses as you can't blame Microsoft or publishers this time.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:25

robot roll call: Mar 7, 2006; dance dance dance dance dance to the radio

A Neurotic Jew posted:

be sure to tell him he has a small window to get a refund still!

he's a true believer but my PC gamer friend I was with at the time
agreed with me that SC is a lost cause

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:28

fuctifino: Jun 11, 2001; by Fluffdaddy

There is a book with Star Traders too? With Chris and Sandi, in their plagiarised costumes?

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:29

trucutru: Jul 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

G0RF posted:

We know it's possible Derek knows the details through well-placed sources and he's laughing reading above because it's so off base.

Possible? possible? Yeah right. More like he is the one who ordered Erin to stop the bullshit!

fuctifino posted:

There is a book with Star Traders too? With Chris and Sandi, in their plagiarised costumes?

It's one of those kickstarter things that, after you paid for them, someday they'll start working on.

trucutru fucked around with this message at 07:35 on Mar 27, 2016

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:31

Neutron Bandit: Apr 28, 2008

I've read a lot of this thread and the one thing I cant understand is this:
A) The game made most of its money on the Star Citizen module, NOT SQ42

B) The development manpower has been almost entirely diverted to the single-player Squadron 42. This is not private knowledge.

C) To my knowledge, not a single microcosm of the work of the AI team has been demonstrated. There is no NPC enemy to fight.

D) Despite the SQ42 priority, SCultists are not disuaded and anyone looking for proof a single-player experience can even exist will come up short.

None of this makes any sense.

Neutron Bandit fucked around with this message at 07:36 on Mar 27, 2016

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:33

SelenicMartian: Sep 14, 2013; Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

fuctifino posted:

There is a book with Star Traders too? With Chris and Sandi, in their plagiarised costumes?

That cover art... It's not just the ring, look at the background.
This really is Limbo of the Lost.

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:34

LazyMaybe: Aug 18, 2013; oouagh

WebDog posted:

I'm really curious to see his look when this collapses as you can't blame Microsoft or publishers this time.

I'm really, really curious what exactly this collapsing will look like. What level of things going wrong will be big enough to cause a chain reaction of many people actually bailing? Or will they just slowly peter out and basically stop ever updating without informing anyone/pretending to still be working, all the diehards still sitting around and waiting for years to come?

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:36

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# ? Jun 16, 2024 09:42

trucutru: Jul 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

Neutron Bandit posted:

I've read a lot of this thread and the one thing I cant understand is this:
A) The game made most of its money on the Star Citizen module, NOT SQ42

B) The development manpower has been almost entirely diverted to the single-player Squadron 42. This is not private knowledge.

C) To my knowledge, not a single microcosm of the work of the AI team has been demonstrated. There is no NPC enemy to fight.

D) Despite the SQ42 priority, SCultists are nor disuaded and anyone looking for proof a single-player experience can even exist will come up short.

None of this makes any sense.

A) Yes.

B) They chose the wrong engine and don't have the expertise to create SC so they were forced to work on what they think (hope) is achievable.

C) There are enemies, they fly around in circles and shot at you when you're in front of them. Wing Commander had better AI.

D) The aristocrats!

# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:37

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