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MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
There comes a time.

I watched those animated shorts the other day and, well, I dunno. It's strange more than anything to hear the characters voiced at all; I never once pondered what real person any given character would/should sound like, and hearing actual voices come out of them...it doesn't exactly weird me out, but I'm not sure I personally care for the idea of an animated or otherwise non-comic Achewood. Different strokes and all that.

That said, towards the (apparent) end of the comic's run it was easy to get the impression Onstad had pretty much exploited that medium for all its worth, so if he wants to try something different, who can blame him? An animated show could well reach a lot of people who wouldn't give the comic the time of day or simply are unaware of its existence, and that's probably better than nothing.

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MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
"He said 'human being' the way old telegrams said STOP" is both one of my favourite Achewoodisms and one I thought would come in handy far more often than it actually has to date, i.e. not at all. Maybe that's a good thing in itself, though. :shobon:

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Johnny Aztec posted:

This: http://achewood.com/index.php?date=11292007
The dialog between them is just great.
It probably speaks volumes about me that I was always expecting Lyle to dildo the cappuccino itself (as he later does for Nolan) to begin with.

... :smith:

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you


Just furiously pissing up that rope.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Rollersnake posted:



It's like Lyle's entire character summed up in a single line.
What makes it funnier still is the following panels, which show Cornelius actually putting/locking away his trumpet. His childhood drum getting stepped on is one thing, but what Lyle proposes... :ohdear:

Sockser posted:

Bahahaha what loving strip is that?
It's found near the end of the Uncle Culpepper arc if I'm not quite mistaken (and assuming you meant the ER one :shobon:).

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Improbable Lobster posted:



Ray isn't someone who thinks too hard about a lot of things.
What Ray means to say is that the media have turned queer sexuality into a commodity.

:colbert:

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
It would appear to me that if you do not dig on janky jams then a restaurant called Jazz Brunch is not a sensible place to be.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Seoinin posted:

I was disappointed in the resolution to the Slam Sapphic Fiction Competition. Felt rushed.
I'm still not sure whether this is a highly topical pun or not.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

A Violence Gang posted:

e: Regarding the discussion of Cornelius's voice from when the strip most recently reappeared, I think this and the following are a great example of his natural speech as well as his ability to relate to a dude who knows what kind of tires he has.
I don't think that random http://hell yes will ever not make me laugh.

Jerusalem posted:

Oh my God, this lead into the Escort Todd storyline :allears:
And thence to North Korean Magical Realism and Ultraviolet Thunder, Immortal Master of Eagles. :cool:

MMAgCh fucked around with this message at 04:46 on Oct 5, 2013

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

rantmo posted:

Just think of how different Romeo and Juliet would have been, had Romeo only had a Hershey's Kiss.
Thus with a kiss I die.

So close and yet so far.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

WoodrowSkillson posted:

Onstad does funny arguments so loving well, and yelling matches between his characters are pretty much always golden.
Onstad's angry characters are virtually always hilarious, really. I can't even think of any exceptions right away.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Loving Life Partner posted:

Aw man, Onstad's insert was Rustmouth all along.
He just might die wealthy and well-regarded after all.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Atmus posted:

Pretty sure Onstad knows enough about the internet to realize it's impossible to remove anything from it.
He got mad respect for the Internet. In a way.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Indie Rocktopus posted:

Maybe you guys can help me with this, because although I accept there will never be an answer, it's still driving me insane:

What does Teodor's Selma Hayek song sound like???
It's sung to the Adam West Batman theme. That is a given.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
Téodor is positively pissed that Beef's getting some while he isn't.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Der Shovel posted:

Now I'm browsing through Achewood again (thanks Deathlove) and stumbled on one of my favourite storylines: electrocuting Pat's dick.

http://achewood.com/index.php?date=09192003

That alt text :v:
Straight up roasting Pat's ding dong, if you will.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

A Violence Gang posted:

I've reread most of the series since the revival, and I can't find it by searching either: wasn't there a strip where we see Cornelius name his pub "The Dude and Catastrophe"?
Nope! None of the non–subscriber strips, at least, as far as I can tell. A few of Mr Bear's blog posts deal with it, however.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
Yeah, that English sounds a little too broken even for Vlad. I'll admit that "fragile pudding of baby" made me chuckle, though.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

withak posted:

What are the chances that the strips where Vlad's voice seems "wrong" are really Liebot strips?
But Lie Bot had Uncle Culpepper's mode of parlance down flawlessly when he impersonated him. He ain't no amateur, he wouldn't screw up like that. :colbert:

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

toasterwarrior posted:

jesus onstad what did achewood do to you man

Jerusalem posted:

The trouble is he hit perfection on :nws: October 24, 2007 :nws: so what the hell was he supposed to do with the rest of his life?
Basically Achewood did a :( that was simultaneously also a :)

Now all that's left for Onstad to do is die wealthy and well–regarded.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Johnny Aztec posted:

I...don't really know how I feel about that. Are you sure Onstad wrote that? It isn't fanfiction?
I could swear I read it in Pat's blog at some point, but it doesn't seem to be in there now that I've looked. :confused: Maybe it was some subscriber–only bonus? Otherwise its ~canonicity~ would appear to be in doubt!

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

prezbuluskey posted:

OK so I'm just getting into Achewood and read this storyline:

http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=03302010

gently caress I don't know if it was supposed to but it tore me to shreds.
Home, she ees...la grande illusion. She a time, no a place...an' you time here was over.

:smith:

The obituaries in this police blotter from five years earlier usually get me for similar reasons.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

prezbuluskey posted:

Melancholy was the proper word I was searchin for. Showed the comic to my roommate. He cried. poo poo's getting strange.
I hope that right afterwards you showed him the strip where Lyle pukes so hard it makes a football go three feet.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
And as always, Todd is left out in the cold. That really is representative of Todd as a whole, though, come to think of it.

Edit: well, there was his Sensible Todd phase, but we all knew where that got him. He's just a crappy little bullshit man, I guess.

MMAgCh fucked around with this message at 16:36 on Dec 15, 2013

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
It seems you need to get to know more people like Todd, then.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

ALEX TRILLTON posted:

Honestly I really liked the stripes about The Prostitute. They were horrifying in the best possible way and I wish that they had continued for a bit longer.
It's too bad they apparently did end up spending a dollar on the Achewood machine once in a while.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Johnny Aztec posted:

He probably couldn't even process the concept of trans-people.
I'm sure they never figured into the honest country values that informed his upbringing. He feared his father was going to kill him just for growing Pubics, after all.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Pakled posted:

I wonder what it says about Roast Beef that all his poems are about weapons hidden in food killing the eater.
Roast Beef is keenly aware that we are never safe, anywhere.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
He's probably just worried he'd run into Trouble Man and No–No again, and who could blame him really? No–No murdered him when he was already dead. That's like, double death. Beef won't take well to that.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

glug posted:

Why can't people find happiness, you jerk.
We been through this.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

satan!!! posted:

Cornelius did mention once playing odd time signatures in a shower with other people once, or something.
That was just an off–the–cuff comment about experimental college bands. :eng101:

Experimental bands formed in college, that is, not bands formed in experimental college. Although that might be kind of neat, too.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

SALT CURES HAM posted:

It seems like that would be a pretty drat simple fate to avoid.
When he was merely born they thought he was probably gonna be a lady; it's not that far–fetched for Beef to worry himself stupid about that kind of thing.

But then, Beef worries himself stupid about most every kind of thing, so. v:shobon:v

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
Still waiting on some closure as to who put that hair on Ray's dang nachos, too.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
Pretty sure that was the MANDRAKE ROOT, and that if she is a down girl she will eat Dudemeal. I too can't find that loving strip though—doesn't seem to be transcribed on that Ohnorobot site for some strange reason (despite claiming that it searches 100% of Achewood comics).

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Sockser posted:

poo poo'S just BARF that you DIDN'T HONOR!
Somehow, I both understand that sentence and don't understand it.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Jerusalem posted:

I can't seem to find it in any strips at the moment so maybe it was in a blog or even Teodor's twitter or something, but I'm sure he's made numerous references over the last few months about trying to figure out things to sell in order to make rent, to the point that the Goodwill comic felt like it had been building up for awhile when it finally appeared.
There was the garage sale. Edit: although that was a few years ago, so maybe not. Goes to show that Téodor's pretty much always been like this, though.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Satorr posted:

The older I get, the more I become like Lyle, period.

This doesn't bode well for my lifespan.
It doesn't bode well for any footballs in your vicinity, either.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

LordSaturn posted:

Can anyone point me to the start of the Story of Lyle?
It's actually in the drop–down menu as "The Ballad of Lyle and Darlene". :shobon:

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

TVs Ian posted:

And also that every sound (computer fan, plumbing, dogs outside, etc) was hidden people trying to talk to me.
Beef could relate to that.

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MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
The Miracle on the Hudson was that Sullenberger managed to both shoot the crook in the driving leg and miss the stolen jewels. That may not sound like much but try it sometime.

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