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CapnBry
Jul 15, 2002

I got this goin'
Grimey Drawer

IRQ posted:

A host of features!!
I almost feel like this whole Origins debacle is worth it just for this pun. A+++ goa'wuld watch again.

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CapnBry
Jul 15, 2002

I got this goin'
Grimey Drawer
Just a heads up, I just got my code for downloading the feature length cut of Stargate Origins in 4K resolution, so they've started going out. Unfortunately it is a code for the iTunes store :sadtrombone:, but it looks like they're also going to have it on Amazon Prime so I guess I will just watch it there. If someone downloads it through iTunes, can you tell us if it has DRM and therefore requires iTunes always be installed to watch it? I don't have any Apple stuff so I can just install it into a VM if I can get a DRM-free download, but would bet dollars to Unas that it is locked down.

CapnBry
Jul 15, 2002

I got this goin'
Grimey Drawer
My prayers to Yu have been answered, Stargate Command is sending out Google Play digital copies of Stargate Origins! Oh boy oh boy I know what I am doing tonight, and no, it isn't continue watching Season 2 Atlantis (one more to go, then just 3 seasons and my 1.2 year journey will be complete) although I really like that show.

But check your email and spacespam folder for your codes, so we can come back and revitalize this thread with some jokes about how bad Stargate Origins: Catherine may be, or jaffa puns.

Zesty
Jan 17, 2012

The Great Twist
ok.

Apoplexy
Mar 9, 2003

by Shine
Do you sincerely think anyone else bought that garbage

Ratjaculation
Aug 3, 2007

:parrot::parrot::parrot:



“Here’s a franchise with a great fan base, endless potential and an ideal opportunity to work with current viewing trends in the age of the internet, have at it”

*somehow creates SG Origins*

pixaal
Jan 8, 2004

All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.


Ratjaculation posted:

“Here’s a franchise with a great fan base, endless potential and an ideal opportunity to work with current viewing trends in the age of the internet, have at it”

*somehow creates SG Origins*

My guess is it was closer to this.

Hey, Stargate has a bunch of nostalgia behind it. People don't care about the future in Stargate, we wrote our selves into a wall! Look at how bad Universe did!*. What if we did something in the past! WW2 is still popular right? I'm not so sure, how about we charge for the nostalgia and let people stream, and keep this low budget to test the waters. If it blows up no big loss, if it hits big we just milk it!

*I think Universe was fine but this is a pretend board meeting for green lighting Stargate Reboot.

CapnBry
Jul 15, 2002

I got this goin'
Grimey Drawer
Woof that Stargate Origins really isn't good. It is a bit better edited all together so it isn't broken up into 3 minute segments, so that's an improvement. The dialog between Catherine and her boyfriend is just completely terrible though and feels almost like they had an ok 42 minute episode but tried to extend it to feature length by having a chatbot write them a buncha lines. I actually found myself interested in the plot around the time the nazi fought the local tough guy so I wouldn't say it is completely without merit. It is shot and lit nicely and has a very cinematic feel to the photography so someone did their job right.

I thought it would have a more interesting sci-fi solution to why Catherine or her father can't re-open the Stargate until the 1990s (except that other set of times they did but forgot about), but guess what? They just get their mind wiped except they will remember to fight Ra when they need to which is a giant loophole I assume they planned to exploit in a sequel.

Professor Beetus
Apr 12, 2007

They can fight us
But they'll never Beetus
Here's an idea: new Stargate show with Joe Flanigan and David Hewlett as leads, bring over some of the cast from Dark Matter playing new characters, bing bong so simple.

Sorry I binged through all the SG stuff a couple years ago and I'm still pissed at how things ended.

pixaal
Jan 8, 2004

All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.


DrNutt posted:

Here's an idea: new Stargate show with Joe Flanigan and David Hewlett as leads, bring over some of the cast from Dark Matter playing new characters, bing bong so simple.

Sorry I binged through all the SG stuff a couple years ago and I'm still pissed at how things ended.

So actually do the final season of Dark Matter in the Stargate universe that almost happened? I want to visit that timeline.

Aleph Null
Jun 10, 2008

You look very stressed
Tortured By Flan

DrNutt posted:

Here's an idea: new Stargate show with Joe Flanigan and David Hewlett as leads, bring over some of the cast from Dark Matter playing new characters, bing bong so simple.

Sorry I binged through all the SG stuff a couple years ago and I'm still pissed at how things ended.

As much as MGM seems to hate and misunderstand Stargate, it's amazing it was allowed to be as good as it was for as long as it was.

Professor Beetus
Apr 12, 2007

They can fight us
But they'll never Beetus

pixaal posted:

So actually do the final season of Dark Matter in the Stargate universe that almost happened? I want to visit that timeline.

Was this almost actually a thing? I was more thinking they could just play better, more fun characters in the SG universe rather than being stuck with their Dark Matter characters. Except girl Data can keep being girl Data, she was great. And Jodelle can reprise her role from Atlantis.

Rocksicles
Oct 19, 2012

by Nyc_Tattoo

DrNutt posted:

Was this almost actually a thing? I was more thinking they could just play better, more fun characters in the SG universe rather than being stuck with their Dark Matter characters. Except girl Data can keep being girl Data, she was great. And Jodelle can reprise her role from Atlantis.

Joe Mallozzi has a habit of going... "cancelled... aww you guys... i was going to do this!"

Ratjaculation
Aug 3, 2007

:parrot::parrot::parrot:



*spends 10 years establishing Carter as a bad rear end biker chick*

first bike chase scene appears

BETTER USE CAM

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Hm.

That gives me an idea.

Has anyone considered the fact that motorcycles would actually work really well with the Stargate system?

I guess what I'm getting at is... A biker gang SG team.

Zesty
Jan 17, 2012

The Great Twist
Remember when Jack was trapped on a planet for months and Teal’c went into the Stargate into a small hole underground?

That, but with five motorcycles squeezed in.

Suspicious
Apr 30, 2005
You know he's the villain, because he's got shifty eyes.
Call it Biker Tauris from Earth.

IRQ
Sep 9, 2001

SUCK A DICK, DUMBSHITS!

Sons of Apophis

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Maybe a Ronon type on horseback

Ratjaculation
Aug 3, 2007

:parrot::parrot::parrot:



I think dirtbikes would suit better given how the galaxy is full of coniferous forests with dirt tracks

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Gatebikes: SG-Xtreme

A sick twisting aerial jump through the gate that loving DEMOLISHES the face of the first Jaffa on the other side.

IRQ
Sep 9, 2001

SUCK A DICK, DUMBSHITS!

I would play a Trials game that involved doing sick dirtbike tricks through stargates.

Doggles
Apr 22, 2007

Shockingly enough, it's been done before:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67E-_SQLVRo&t=54s

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

It's... Beautiful!

Light Gun Man
Oct 17, 2009

toEjaM iS oN
vaCatioN




Lipstick Apathy
totally onboard with this gatebike plan

Professor Beetus
Apr 12, 2007

They can fight us
But they'll never Beetus
Well if the next Trials game doesn't have Stargates I'm going to be tremendously disappointed.

Rocksicles
Oct 19, 2012

by Nyc_Tattoo

Ratjaculation posted:

I think dirtbikes would suit better given how the galaxy is full of coniferous forests with dirt tracks

Right? i have said this to my brother. Give them a dune buggy or something.

GreenNight
Feb 19, 2006
Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

Rocksicles posted:

Right? i have said this to my brother. Give them a dune buggy or something.

Yeah look how great it worked in that TNG movie.

Rocksicles
Oct 19, 2012

by Nyc_Tattoo

GreenNight posted:

Yeah look how great it worked in that TNG movie.

Don't imply i have seen TNG. It's rude and i will not stand for it

Mu Zeta
Oct 17, 2002

Me crush ass to dust

GreenNight posted:

Yeah look how great it worked in that TNG movie.

The best part is that Picard wanted a dune buggy while they had access to a runabout.

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

"The SGC has taken note that often the gate is many klicks away from the target area. We've devised a cutting-edge device based on Goa'uld hover technology and some other poo poo we had kicking around, idk crystals let's say."

*a Segway dolled up with greebles rolls up to each SG team member*

"Technology like this is expensive, fellas, so never leave your scooter behind or you're fired. Like, the second you get back."

Rocksicles
Oct 19, 2012

by Nyc_Tattoo

Brawnfire posted:

"The SGC has taken note that often the gate is many klicks away from the target area. We've devised a cutting-edge device based on Goa'uld hover technology and some other poo poo we had kicking around, idk crystals let's say."

*a Segway dolled up with greebles rolls up to each SG team member*

"Technology like this is expensive, fellas, so never leave your scooter behind or you're fired. Like, the second you get back."

Can you imagine from coming in hot in a dune buggy... the puddle jumper had inertial dampeners.

mossyfisk
Nov 8, 2010

FF0000
You can drive tanks through a stargate so try not to think about it too hard

IRQ
Sep 9, 2001

SUCK A DICK, DUMBSHITS!

Rocksicles posted:

Don't imply i have seen TNG. It's rude and i will not stand for it

It's rude to imply that anyone has seen Insurrection, to be fair.

Rocksicles
Oct 19, 2012

by Nyc_Tattoo

IRQ posted:

It's rude to imply that anyone has seen Insurrection, to be fair.

META!

CapnBry
Jul 15, 2002

I got this goin'
Grimey Drawer
Totally on board for Radgate... which I just realized was bicycles and not dirt bikes.

They send that aerial drone through the gate some times, why not just put a little man inside that and let him do all the work? Put some food in the craft too, for god's sake, man. Do I have to think of everything? We'll tape his favorite shows, he won't miss anything.

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

A puppet-based action series where a secret agent is inserted by drone into sensitive places and must perform sensitive missions... But he's the size of a finger! What sorts of adventures will MiniDroneMan experience?

pixaal
Jan 8, 2004

All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.


Brawnfire posted:

A puppet-based action series where a secret agent is inserted by drone into sensitive places and must perform sensitive missions... But he's the size of a finger! What sorts of adventures will MiniDroneMan experience?

Is he going up someone's butt?

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

In at least two episodes, several seasons apart.

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Polaron
Oct 13, 2010

The Oncoming Storm

mossyfisk posted:

You can drive tanks through a stargate so try not to think about it too hard

Yeah, but first you have to get the tank to the gate.

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