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Crackerman posted:Alternatively you could watch Barton Fink first, then Monsters Inc. So instead of the toe line you have "BECAUSE YOU. DON'T. LISTEN." Ah but if you watch Barton Fink instead, you don't get the double-whammy of role reversals that Big Lebowski gives you - not just Goodman playing friendly and good-hearted/aggressive and clueless, but Buscemi playing slippery and villainous/friendly and dopey.
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Oct 2, 2011 05:42
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I just watched Abduction earlier today. It physically hurt me.
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Oct 2, 2011 06:49
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OneThousandMonkeys posted:My dark secret is that I really enjoy Waterworld, mainly because of Dennis Hopper. Leaving out all the extraneous theatrics like the budget issues, Costner's weird creative baggage, and what was probably one of the most awful shoots to work on in Hollywood history, it's just a fun movie to me. Your're not the only one. I felt it to be a pretty decent adventure style movie that took itself probably a bit too seriously as in the end its really very typically holywood action. Dennis Hopper really did carry the movie though without a doubt. I am a bit of a sucker for these kinds of movies though and i legitimately think that Prince of Thieves is a very good action/adventure movie and never really had an issue with Kevin Costner and his slowly waining British accent. Kevin Costner can be best summed as "Kevin Costner as Kevin Costner in Robin Hood: Prince of thieves" which rubs people the wrong way a lot.
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Oct 2, 2011 16:16
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It really seemed to me at the time that people turned on Kevin Costner for no good reason. He was in a bunch of good successful movies like Dances with Wolves, Field of Dreams, Bull Durham, Prince of Thieves, JFK etc.. Then all of a sudden Waterworld comes along and even before it came out it was labeled a bomb and he became the butt of a lot of jokes and his career went downhill pretty much. Of course The Postman was another movie that bombed right after Waterworld so that probably had a lot to do with the career part.
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Oct 2, 2011 16:34
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Schweinhund posted:It really seemed to me at the time that people turned on Kevin Costner for no good reason. He was in a bunch of good successful movies like Dances with Wolves, Field of Dreams, Bull Durham, Prince of Thieves, JFK etc.. Then all of a sudden Waterworld comes along and even before it came out it was labeled a bomb and he became the butt of a lot of jokes and his career went downhill pretty much. Of course The Postman was another movie that bombed right after Waterworld so that probably had a lot to do with the career part. Wyatt Earp came right before Waterworld too, so three high-profile, big-budget flops in a row. More importantly, I think his ego and his meddling were blamed for the first two, and he straight up directed The Postman so...
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Oct 2, 2011 17:05
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There was also a highly-publicized incident where he tried to build a massive golf course on land sacred to Native Americans.
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Oct 2, 2011 17:11
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Nutsngum posted:I am a bit of a sucker for these kinds of movies though and i legitimately think that Prince of Thieves is a very good action/adventure movie and never really had an issue with Kevin Costner and his slowly waining British accent. Yeah, I've always had a soft spot for it, especially because of Alan Rickman's hilariously over-the-top performance as the Sheriff and Morgan Freeman in his patented wise older dude mode. Still, it's got some great action setpieces and it did inspire the classic  in Men In Tights: "Unlike other Robin Hoods, I can speak with an English accent."
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Oct 2, 2011 17:28
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I should probably give Prince of Thieves a watch, but I hate it on principal since it gave us that loving Bryan Adams song.
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Oct 2, 2011 20:34
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I like Waterworld well enough. It seems weird to me that it's gotten such a negative reputation after the fact- when it came out, most of the reviews were middling, nobody was pronouncing it the worst movie ever made- all that buzz was from people who were just scandalized at the expense. Anyway, we doin' this (prepare for  ): I loving love this movie. Probably because it's so hated- at the time it was one of the most viciously derided and despised films ever to lurch into theaters. It wasn't screened for critics, so those who did go to see it had poison pens in hand, and the Daily Mail even sent a guy in a turkey suit to the movie's UK premiere. It never had a chance. I get why a lot of fans of the original series hate it. A big part of the show's appeal was the chemistry between Patrick Macnee as John Steed and Diana Rigg as Emma Peel. They gave great performances by themselves and were a perfect match, and nobody could live up to them, period. But the first episodes of the show I ever saw were the last season with Linda Thorson as Tara King (who was also underrated but this is getting away from the point), so for me I just liked the show for how weird and strange and stereotypically British it was. (Deliberately so: the producers wanted overseas sales, and so made the show more like what people thought the UK was like rather than anything resembling reality.) Anyway, that's what the movie gets right. It's phantasmagoric and hallucinogenic from the get go, with a superb opening credits sequence followed by an opener where secret agent John Steed (Fiennes), taking a training course, fights milkmen and mechanics and looks askance at a sinister group of nuns. Dr. Emma Peel (Thurman), scientist and bon vivant, gets accused of blowing up a weather control station, and they team up to find the real enemy. Who turns out (spoiler alert!) to be Sean Connery as Sir August De Winter, a former Ministry agent who created the weather shield program and now wants to conquer ze world. A bad response at a preview screening gave Warner Bros. the bright idea of removing 30 minutes of footage from the final film, most of which was stuff that explained what was going on. Most critics found it impossible to follow- I didn't, despite not having much foreknowledge, but I've got an ASD so maybe that makes the difference. It does have a very hurried pace, though, and some parts are given the short shrift. In the script, the Ministry head- "Mother", a man in a wheelchair played by Jim Broadbent, gives the two a briefing about how freak weather-related craziness is happening all over Britain, but this was cut which makes references to it confusing. Why Emma Peel has an evil twin running around is explained VERY briefly. And so on. But there's a lot I love about this movie. It's visually gorgeous and has a rich, welcoming atmosphere (and a superb music score). It doesn't feel like most action movies or spy movies, it's more like a fantasy. There's all sorts of inspired surrealism- a meeting of the bad guys who protect their identities from each other by wearing teddy bear costumes, a camera hidden in the "eye" of a peacock's tail, all sorts of mazes and optical illusions. It all kinda makes sense in a poetic way- the villain wants to control the forces of nature, the good guys learn to adapt and prepare for whatever comes their way (Steed always carries his trusty umbrella.) The dialogue DOES kinda suck- they try too hard to have a lot of clever wordplay and overload the puns by a factor of a whole bunch. Like, when Emma is fighting her double and Steed comes along and Bad Emma runs away, Emma says, "Just in time to save me from myself." Fine. Then Steed says, "I thought I was seeing double." Overdoing it. Then Emma says, "That makes two of us." WE GET IT. But while Fiennes and Thurman aren't the Steed and Peel we know, they don't try and imitate the originals either. At the end of the day they're both good and charming actors and I even thought they had a nice understated chemistry. It's kind of sweet sometimes. The movie also has a great supporting cast- Broadbent, Eddie Izzard as a minion, Fiona Shaw, Eileen Atkins, John Wood, etc. It was a total flop and still there are very few people who would admit to liking it, but I'm a fan. I wish we could get a director's cut or something.
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Oct 2, 2011 21:15
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I thought The Avengers was pretty terrible, but as you say it had a lot of exposition cut out of it. The main thing I remember (apart from Sean Ryder as a minor baddie and the shot of Big Ben exploding that I'm sure came from Mars Attacks) was how forced and strained Fiennes and Thurman felt in their roles - they didn't have anything of the easy confidence of MacNee and Rigg. One critic said of Fiennes something like "He comes across as a boy wearing his dad's suit." The main problem was that it took a feature of the original show - each episode/case had some strange and quirky element to it - and blew it up a hundredfold so everything was "strange" and "quirky" (by some wacked-out Hollywood standard), ending up like Batman & Robin in a bowler hat.
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Oct 2, 2011 23:15
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Well, in fairness, the color seasons got pretty loving insane. "Epic", from the first year in color, has Emma kidnapped and run through a mad director's dream of killing her as part of a movie, and at some point a psuedo-MGM logo appears around her head and she roars.
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Oct 3, 2011 00:48
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The Avengers is one of those films I remember watching as a child and sort of liking yet i barely remember it. All I can recall is that Sean Connery wore a kilt constantly.
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Oct 3, 2011 02:00
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The Avengers was a movie that a load of extremely old people, who felt emotionally attached to the source material got enraged about and anyone who had never seen the series just felt a little bemused by. It was ok, but it's more interesting to look back and see how professional critics were well into their nerd-rages long before the internet picked up on it.
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Oct 3, 2011 09:18
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They should have based the movie on the first season, when the hero was a doctor avenging (geddit?) the murder of his fiancee by drug dealers and Steed was a no-nonsense government agent in a trenchcoat. It couldn't have left people any less bewildered. "Shouldn't there be a woman in a leather catsuit?" Incidentally, I just checked out the availability of Avengers DVDs, and while the TV series is for some reason ridiculously expensive on Amazon, the movie is available new for just 92p. I'm almost tempted.  (Hell, I already own things like Lifeforce, Diabolik, Razor Blade Smile and Condorman which suit this thread perfectly.)
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Oct 3, 2011 11:53
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This is going off-topic but the availability of the TV show on DVD has been weird from the get-go. Whoever's in charge of the rights isn't very consistent about it, and there were a lot of quality complaints with the first releases.
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Oct 3, 2011 15:17
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Black Lighter posted:See, I saw this movie back when it came out and, yeah, those all seem like perfectly valid criticisms to me, and you can throw "blunt", "toothless" and "seemingly edited with a sledgehammer" on top. Just because some of the critics who gave it a bad review might have been homophobic (I'm not wading through the reviews to find out if that was actually the case) doesn't make it a good movie. Speaking of gay-friendly films that got the cack kicked out of them, anyone fancy having a crack at Even Cowgirls Get the Blues?
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Oct 3, 2011 21:50
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Kerbtree posted:Speaking of gay-friendly films that got the cack kicked out of them, anyone fancy having a crack at Even Cowgirls Get the Blues? No, no, that one is pretty much a sack of poo poo. I don't think that it's a stretch to say that But I'm A Cheerleader tends to be very well-liked in the lesbian community. As much of a bad reputation as lesbian movies have, there tends to be a divide between ones that aren't great films but are decently received (like Cheerleader or Better Than Chocolate) and ones that are just terrible, like Cowgirls.
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Oct 4, 2011 12:59
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Eggie posted:I haven't rewatched Super Mario Bros. in a little while but I think it's an okay movie. Ignoring how unlike the games it is, it makes an... interesting adventure film. Also, it had atmosphere. I wonder if the creators had a story lying around then got asked to make a Super Mario movie and just switched some names in the script around. I watched this poo poo a few months ago with a friend. Never in my life have I ever needed so much alcohol to get me through a movie (not even Battlefield Earth) and I STILL barely made it through the movie. I saw it once before when it was new and hated it then, but holy christ. I can't actually remember what they were, but there were several glaring plotholes, and the dialogue was just amazing in how bad it was. I give the visual style some poo poo because...why the hell did we get a cyberpunk Mario  , but the real issues were the script and plot. The movie was just stupid and lovely and I hated it. Movie makers should have realized then and there that video game movies don't work.Instead, they still make poo poo like Dead or Alive. Hey, anyone wanna volunteer for that one or am I gonna have to take the plunge? I've never actually seen it but the trailer is just so bad that it cannot possibly be real...
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Oct 4, 2011 18:10
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Dead or Alive at least understands its audience - they want fighting and tits. It pretty much ignores all of the male characters. I seem to remember it having some pretty funny bits as well, it certainly doesn't take itself seriously. I wrote this as I was watching it.
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Oct 4, 2011 18:15
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I enjoyed Dead or Alive for what it is. It's certainly more fun to watch than the boring abominations that are the live Tekken and King of Fighters movies. Then again, I don't give a poo poo about the "canon" Dead or Alive storyline and neither should anyone. Jaime Pressly and Kevin Nash are hilarious and well cast as Tina and Bass Armstrong, and the whole movie is very lighthearted and campy in a mostly good way. The only aspects that I really disliked were Devon Aoki (how did she even become a actress? A real doll would have a bigger range than her) and that Ryu doesn't fight a tank or helicopter with a sword. Not even once. See it with friends and a couple of beers and you should have a good time.
Renoistic fucked around with this message at 20:59 on Oct 4, 2011 |
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Oct 4, 2011 20:52
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Renoistic posted:Then again, I don't give a poo poo about the "canon" Dead or Alive storyline and neither should anyone. if it helps, their own wiki doesn't care about Story, either. http://deadoralive.wikia.com/wiki/Dead_or_Alive_(game) So, in essence: the most accurate video game to movie adaption?
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Oct 4, 2011 21:35
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Jenkin posted:No, no, that one is pretty much a sack of poo poo. Sidebar but if you are interested in genuinely good movies with lesbian themes, Desert Hearts (drama) and Kissing Jessica Stein (comedy) are well-reviewed and very watchable.
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Oct 4, 2011 21:44
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I have always been partial to D.E.B.S., myself. Although, I had no idea that it was a lesbian romantic comedy when I first started watching.
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Oct 5, 2011 02:51
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Not to beat a dead horse, but if we're talking about bad movies that are also landmarks in lesbian cinema, look no further than The Watermelon Woman: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0118125/ Prominent black lesbian feminist Cheryl Dunye plays herself as she tries to investigate the life an unnamed black actress from the 30's credited as "The Watermelon Woman" who played "mammie" characters in old films. At the same time, she starts a relationship with a white woman. Where do I begin? This movie is beyond amateur. The delivery of every line is miserably wooden. The editing is atrocious. The writing is cheesy beyond belief. The humor is unbelievably forced. For every way you can think a movie could suck, The Watermelon Woman sucks in that way. I'm not even going to get into the "plot", but, suffice to say, it's resolved in the laziest, shittiest way possible: Cheryl just loving gives up on figuring out more about the Watermelon Woman after encountering minor obstacles and dumps her new girlfriend offscreen, then explains this to the camera. Fin! I could forgive all this, though, if the movie gave me any reason to believe its makers cared about it just a little. But, apparently not! There are scenes in the FINAL CUT (the version I had to watch on DVD for a class, at least) where the actresses noticeably flub their lines and just keep on going. I can't begin to imagine how anyone thought it would be a good idea to keep those scenes in. This is all such a shame, because (could be wrong about this) The Watermelon Woman is one of the first movies made by and for women of color (Edit: I meant "lesbians of color"). It feels like a waste for such a watershed moment to be wasted on such unprofessional crap. Forty fucked around with this message at 19:50 on Oct 8, 2011 |
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Oct 5, 2011 06:53
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Ninja Gamer posted:I have always been partial to D.E.B.S., myself. Although, I had no idea that it was a lesbian romantic comedy when I first started watching. Also seconding (or thirding) that DOA is possibly both the best* and the most true-to-source videogame movie made to date. It's just a goofy, glossy update of Enter The Dragon with hot chicks in bikinis, and it has no shame about that. (*Relatively speaking, obviously.)
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Oct 5, 2011 11:22
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Payndz posted:
I would argue Mortal Kombat beats DOA in both categories.
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Oct 5, 2011 13:28
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exquisite tea posted:Sidebar but if you are interested in genuinely good movies with lesbian themes, Desert Hearts (drama) and Kissing Jessica Stein (comedy) are well-reviewed and very watchable. Desert Hearts I get, but Kissing Jessica Stein? I don't know, pretty much the only film that has a "and there's the lesbian, going back to a dude" scene that gets a pass from me is The Kids are All Right, and that's only because the dude is told to gently caress off. Funny story though: one of my friends went on a date with a woman who swore up and down that was really a lesbian, no really. On their first date, said woman suggested they go see Kissing Jessica Stein. Not long after, she realized that she wasn't really a lesbian.
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Oct 5, 2011 14:50
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weekly font posted:I would argue Mortal Kombat beats DOA in both categories. I saw both Mortal Kombat films about a month ago. While the first one isn't that good, it is still watchable and at certain parts even enjoyable. The second one is just a complete mess. I see how it is probably hard to write something coherent about killer cyborgs from parallel universes, parasites warping in through the petrified bodies of demons and a guy with metal arms learning that the power to win was inside him the whole time fighting each other to save the world from a giant with a cool skull mask that mindwiped some chick that screams really loud while all the time hoping people don't notice Christopher Lambert is missing....but wow.
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Oct 5, 2011 15:10
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Mortal Kombat: Annihilation is so bad I'm amazed it got a theatrical release, with posters and ads on TV and everything. Everything about it just screams direct-to-video.
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Oct 5, 2011 15:18
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Maxwell Lord posted:Mortal Kombat: Annihilation is so bad I'm amazed it got a theatrical release, with posters and ads on TV and everything. Everything about it just screams direct-to-video. I refused to see it when I realized they had replaced Acting God Christopher Lambert as Raiden. You don't just replace the loving Highlander like that. 
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Oct 5, 2011 16:28
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Maxwell Lord posted:Mortal Kombat: Annihilation is so bad I'm amazed it got a theatrical release, with posters and ads on TV and everything. Everything about it just screams direct-to-video. You had to be 15 to see that movie when it came out here. I was fourteen. The one and only time I ever got asked about my age when I went to see a movie was when I went to see that one. I lied about my age to get into Mortal Kombat: Annihilation. 
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Oct 5, 2011 17:36
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I've said it before in another thread, but when I saw that movie in theaters (I was 12) the kid in front of me screamed "NOO!" and cried when Johnny Cage was killed at the beginning, and didn't stop crying until at least an hour in to the movie.
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Oct 5, 2011 17:41
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I still love that the tagline was "Destroy all Expectations" Yes, it certainly did.
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Oct 5, 2011 17:45
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BioTech posted:I saw both Mortal Kombat films about a month ago. While the first one isn't that good, it is still watchable and at certain parts even enjoyable. The second one is just a complete mess. Mortal Kombat Annihilation is a magnificent misinterpretation of what made the first movie fun to watch. And difficult as it might have been to shove 40 characters with wacky backstories into one movie, I still kinda think the person who came up with "Shao Kahn is my brother" ought to be shot.
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Oct 5, 2011 19:44
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Parachute posted:I've said it before in another thread, but when I saw that movie in theaters (I was 12) the kid in front of me screamed "NOO!" and cried when Johnny Cage was killed at the beginning, and didn't stop crying until at least an hour in to the movie. I'm just imagining the kid was wearing the sunglasses and had his hair just like Cage's. His idol, killed before his very eyes.
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Oct 5, 2011 21:46
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davidspackage posted:And difficult as it might have been to shove 40 characters with wacky backstories into one movie, Oh my God. Just thinking about Rain's (the purple ninja that only appeared in the Nintendo 64 version of the game) 30-second appearance in the movie cracks me up. Rain: We defeated the rebels, sire! Shao Kahn: Did you make them beg for mercy? Rain: I... uh... well... Shao Kahn: HOW DARE YOU FAIL ME Rain: It won't happen again! Shao Kahn: You're right. IT WON'T (tosses Rain down a bottomless pit) And yeah, that was Rain's scene. Maxwell Lord posted:Mortal Kombat: Annihilation is so bad I'm amazed it got a theatrical release, with posters and ads on TV and everything. Everything about it just screams direct-to-video. It was #1 for a weekend, too!
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Oct 5, 2011 21:50
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Maxwell Lord posted:Mortal Kombat: Annihilation is so bad I'm amazed it got a theatrical release, with posters and ads on TV and everything. Everything about it just screams direct-to-video. And the first one didn't? Haha. Both those movies have aged SO poorly...
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Oct 5, 2011 22:44
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The first Mortal Kombat still holds a special place in my heart the same way the original Clash of the Titans does. It isn't a very cool movie but the first time you see it as a kid makes you think it is the most awesome thing ever. I saw it again a few months ago on TV and even though the special effects are dated as gently caress, even though there are so many plotholes you expect the characters to trip down one and never be seen again, even though Sub Zero was killed in the most idiotic way possible, it was hard for me not to love the whole thing for nostalgic value.
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Oct 5, 2011 23:00
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lizardman posted:Oh my God. Just thinking about Rain's (the purple ninja that only appeared in the Nintendo 64 version of the game) 30-second appearance in the movie cracks me up. There are a million ridiculous things worth pointing out about this movie. I'm tempted to rewatch it and do it for this thread, but it'd likely end up being too long for a movie that no one has ever doubted being Really That Bad. In that scene you transcribed, Rain actually reports the capture of Stryker and Kabal. That line is their entire movie appearance. Rain gets another cameo though, because later on when Baraka gets kicked into a firepit, they re-use the footage of Rain falling into it. And Sheeva actually makes her entire four-armed appearance only to get killed by a falling cage before she can punch anyone. The way characters make a completely pointless hop on stage and then get yanked off again is absolutely amazing.
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Oct 5, 2011 23:11
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There are few things I could tell you about my life that are more embarrassing than "I paid actual money to go see Mortal Kombat: Annihilation at the cinema". God, it was such a terrible movie. There's random mud-wrestling, characters appearing and dying in the same breath, ninjas falling out of the sky and fight editing roughly on-par with an episode of Hercules: The Legendary Journeys. The first Mortal Kombat at least had some fun fight scenes in it.
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Oct 5, 2011 23:24
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