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Blasphemaster posted:It's Zimzamawhimwham, TYVM. Would he like a TimTam?
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Jun 21, 2019 00:22
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I wonder if we could get snarls a way to see through the eyes of other dogs somehow. Also, how many generations of 'Watches the fuzzies' has Snarls gone through at this point? 90 odd years of dog generations must be like 15 or 20 or something.
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Jun 21, 2019 00:46
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Honestly our dog is a little creepy with that whole thing
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Jun 21, 2019 00:48
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Crazycryodude posted:That was Zimran(m?) IIRC. I'm very glad we remember that name. Until the end of the thread I will maintain that zimran's idea of making gebebs do patrols was sound, given that while it would be dangerous they would not be put on suicide missions. Gets em tough & rough. Gotta be prepared for insane buralisms just in case we get kitroned. Maybe El will favor them like Ruth or the one drop of Labaras' blood they probably maybe had from that one guy ancient ghost guy would get woken up. I will permanently be disappointed with how that guy who begged us to make his brother blooded went. I'm still rooting for those weak-as-a-newborn losers & hope one day one will be tough enough to go on south expedition part 2. However now that we talked to Amos this may be a loving terrible idea. I dunno if he's really right but he didn't seem to lie.
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Jun 21, 2019 01:08
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Also one reason to try and invest in tech solutions that are pointless for mighties is Rimath. I consider us to be responsible for their protection, and in the worst possible case they should have at least a sliver of a fall back to rely on. Therefore crossbows or whatever, chariots & poo poo have some value. It won't help vs dooms but it would have helped those adults trying to head north. Maybe two families would have survived.
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Jun 21, 2019 01:15
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Crazycryodude posted:Honestly our dog is a little creepy with that whole thing - Og 'I married my sister' Enkidel.
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Jun 21, 2019 01:33
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Diogines posted:[*]Many traders and their guards tell you stories of the sorts of ferocious beasts which dwell in the grasslands. You are not entirely sure if these creatures are actually real or not but the men you speak with all swear they are true, some claim to have even seen them. According to Uriah some of these men are not lying to you, though that does not mean that they are right either. According to those you speak with, the grasslands are full of giant animals and other fiercer things, actual ferocious monsters. There is an... element of it to the sorts of stories your mother told you as a young child, making it seem like the world was full of monsters and fantastical things with one always over the next hill. Diogines posted:D. The former employer of Agli the Caravan Guard is apparently destitute after betting against you and losing everything last night. From what Agli said his former employer is very well traveled and knows the secret ways to appease many of the beasts in the grass and the safe paths through the grass. Have a chat with a very hung over merchant and try to make a deal with him. Perhaps you can buy the information you need from this now destitute man or just... carry him and use him as a guide? Directions to two of the closest settlements are one thing but there are no roads in the grasslands to say nothing of the fact that the Kadmonim you spoke with seemed to think that the grasslands are filled with unknown dangers. Someone who can give you detailed directions along the way would be invaluable if they are right. Or perhaps the man can give you directions to other interesting places?  You find Erbuke the Trader, the former employer of a man who won a substantial amount betting on you throwing boulders and gave you directions to a Kadmonim village, the village of Dezfu, a permanent village and apparently a major stopping point for merchant traffic coming further from the east, a village owned by the Bencaleb. Well, you find Erbuke... and rather a lot of other people as well. You find Erbuke the Trader as he is slowly being drowned by a group of very angry looking Kadmonim men who are dunking him into a well repeatedly by a rope tied around his legs while angrily shouting in a foreign tongue.  Your new friend, the cheerful would-be-Ball Igal helpfully chimes in to you as you, he and Uriah approach. Igal says "They are shouting about the money, the money, pay us the money, we will rip you to pieces, we will defile you with stallions, we will stuff you full of horse poo poo, we will stake and feed you to ants, pay us, pay us and uh... increasingly vulgar and profane threats as to what they are going to do if they do not pay him, Magistrate. Most of them are probably his former employees but some of them are locals, they are also yelling at each other as to who gets paid first, I recognize them." And indeed some of the man are loudly shouting at each other and not simply drowning Erbuke. The crowd parts as you approach and trying to look extra mean and tough(which is not difficult because you are after all a giant) you declare that "You can drown him when I am done with him. *MY* claim comes first!" Igal says something in their tongue and he adds even more menace to his tone than you did! Well, it must have worked because no one tries to stop you as you carry off(literally) the half drowned merchant away, him dangling by the rope over one of your shoulders. You try to look extra mean to anyone watching. When you judge you that you are a safe distance away you gently put the man down and cut the ropes from him. You act as if you expected a thank you but the man does not seem at all pleased at you having saved his life.  "The horse friend, the horse friend?" Erbuke says to you, "you are no horse friend, I name you horse fiend! No man can do what it is that you have done! You are no man! You have come into my life as a curse and taken from me everything that I hold dear!" Erbuke looks rather upset, then he looks down, tears in his eyes as he races his hands to his face and shouts "Yafa! Yafa! I am sorry!" The man looks up to you again and angrily says to you "What is it that I have done to deserve the curse that is you!? Have you come to torment me further!? Every man that I have ever known and many strangers now demand money they claim I owe to them, but I know with certainty I owe you nothing!" Igal chides the man saying that you have done absolutely nothing to him besides give him free beer, it is his fault if he gambled far more than he owned! Which as you talk you quickly discovered is indeed the case, the man is apparently not only destitute, but deeply in debt as he continued to bet against you as others wagered upon your rock throwing prowess. Diogines posted:A tremendously good time is had by all as you eat and drink. Uriah sings(beautifully) and gambles and tell stories of his(and a few of your) GLORIOUS demonic conquests, waving the Cephalot claw around as he does to drive the point home. It is a good thing you are basically immune to intoxication for you drink enough to kill any mortal man. Several mortal men, actually. Though the Kadmonim traders seem to look upon well Blooded men with suspicion at best and hatred at worse you as the supposed spawn of Enkidu spawn you make an excellent impression. Men laugh and eventually wager as you are asked to perform feats of strength such as throwing increasingly larger rocks towards the horizon until they run out of larger stones, one particularly lucky merchant guard bet all he owned upon you and let it ride, apparently by the time the betting was done his former employer was in debt to him and financially destitute! You even engaged in a literal pissing contest, winning on distance but losing on accuracy. A lively and festive time is had by all, some men from the Bencaleb even attend. What do you want from him? You tell the man that a thank you would be nice for a start, for you have saved many people from demons and monsters done many great things and usually people are happy when you save their lives. Erbuke says to you despondently "I have no life, you may as well have let them finish drowning me, at least it would have been quick. I have nothing. Not even Yafa, which I have treasured far above all which I once possessed!" Frowning you tell the man that you are going off into the grassland seeking adventure, but you also seek knowledge of distant places, secret places, treasure, monsters, the supposedly secret paths through the grasslands and ways to trick, avoid or appease the many beasts supposedly among the grass. You were told this man is an experienced and well traveled trader, if he tells you these things you will pay him well. Exceedingly well. You reach into your pack and throw a handful of silver coins and jewelry into the dirt in front of the man to drive the point home.  "I would not betray the secrets of my fathers for something as worthless as my own life. Keep your dirty silver!" Igal leans in quietly to you and says "From what i've been able to learn the "secrets" of their ways through the grass are passed down among their clans and carefully guarded, not exactly like, but perhaps not unlike the secrets passed down by the King and his Mighty Men to their sons?" 1. How do you want to deal with this man? Please read all of the options, even if you find one you like early, later options have more information on your situation. Thank you. A. You are very big and very strong and no one seems to care what happens to Erbuke. Sure he SAYS he won't talk but a majority of his bones have not been broken yet! Torture Erbuke for information. B. Apparently Erbuke had numerous talismans and protective charms to help with various monsters and animals and other... things in the grass but all were taken by his creditors. He won't sell them to you, for indeed he does not even OWN them anymore but he is willing to tell you who has them, for a price. You... probably can't actually buy them from whoever owns them now actually? Sure, many possibly "sham" amulets were for sale in the markets here but the ones Erbuke had must have been the "real" thing if he was a well traveled merchant? Try to buy any you can and then just steal them. People need to sleep, you don't need to(much), larceny ho! C. "Who is Yafa?" Igal asks of the man. "Her hair is long and golden and her beauty unparalleled, her eyes are as the moon and her smile kind enough to melt your heart, a truly gentle soul!" Erburke says before he begins to weep again, putting his hands to his face. "They took your wife?!" Igal says. Igal may be from Dor but slavery is... not exactly popular there anymore anyway, to say nothing of the VERY strong feelings men in Kavodel have about this as well, you see Uriah's nostrils flare in anger as well at the thought that the man's creditors grabbed his wife! "I loved her even more than any of my wives! Yafa! I am sorry! Beloved!" Erbuke seems truly distraught. After considering this a moment Igal says "Wait, wait, you do not mean THAT Yafa? You owned THAT Yafa?" It is only after further inquiry do you discover that Erbuke is apparently truly heart broken over the loss of that thing he loved more than anything in this world....  A horse. Yafa is a horse. According to Igal "I had no idea. El preserve if this idiot lost HER I can't even imagine how much he gambled away. That horse is well known in Carine Magistrate, and from a famous bloodline. It is supposed to be exceptionally fast, hardy and beautiful." The Kadmonim sometimes truly bond with their horses and from what you learned so far, they believe that to ride into the hereafter without one means they cannot join their ancestors, being too filled with shame. Erbuke seems heart broken over the loss of his beloved and also famous horse. You asked Erbuke if he will spill his guts to you on what you wish to know if you recover the horse for him and the man tries to speak but only sobs, asking him to choose between his most beloved horse and his honor. But he does not say no. You send Igal and Uriah off to find whoever has the horse now while you speak with Erbuke more. The pair return a short time later, Uriah says "They won't sell the horse, regardless of the price. Apparently the Ganaive have it now and won't part with it." Bugger. Weeeeell. Time to steal a horse. Wait for an opportune time to sneak into the Ganaive compound and... climb over the wall with a horse? Or something. gently caress, you can figure that out then. But steal a horse. If you decide to do this it may well all happen without further votes or if there are any, at most one or two, the Capybaras promise. Your daring horse-napping-adventure will not be a prolonged series of votes. D. Go to the compound of House Ganaive here and try to talk to them, even if they refused to sell the horse to Uriah and Igal, perhaps Enkidel the Horse Friend can apply some Horse Friend charm to get them to sell it or cut a deal with you? E. Approach the men of House Ganaive and insult them, challenge them to a duel of honor and DEMAND they give you the horse! Honor seems very important to the Kadmonim. From what you have seen of them(which is not a lot), the men of House Ganaive do not seem nearly as blooded as the Bencaleb. F. E., and if they refuse, break the loving doors of their gambling den down and TAKE the horse by force. You are an El-drat-Giant compared to almost everyone here, who would DARE stop the mighty Enkidel Horse Friend?! G. Using most of the total riches you brought, go to the Bencaleb, the most powerful group in Kazdack and tell them it is wrong to allow Erbuke's creditors to take his horse if he CAN pay his debts. Surely that cannot be allowed! El preserve, Erbuke was a very wealthy man apparently and bet against you, consistently, letting it ride until his total losses were... ludicrous. Erbuke was apparently once a VERY wealthy man and even then bet considerably more than he owned. H. Erbuke seems adamant he will not sell the information you want for money but perhaps you can persuade him to anyway. Though they are your VERY extended family, you have relatives in Baitel by marriage. Offer Erbuke a whole lot of silver AND offer to help him get a new business running in Baitel. With the loss of his protective charms and talismans his business here seems ruined, well, even besides the fact that he owes a truly ludicrous amount of money to people? I. Thems the breaks Erbuke! Don't bet Truly Ludicrous Amounts of Silver against Enkidel the Horse Friend's mighty strength! Leave and do something else. The something else will be a separate vote. J. I have another idea on how to get information from Erbuke. What? Fill in. [...] You can freely speak with Igal, Uriah and Erbuke and if you wish to track down Agli, though ideally please keep the questions limited roughly to this issue, instead of just pumping them for information on the world in general. A few other questions are fine but if there are dozens "off topic" we will stop to make sure we can focus on the issue at hand. [...] Travic's Awesome Index: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3550307&pagenumber=4080&perpage=40#post473373440 If you want to, feel free to join us on irc #madgod on synirc.net. The channel tends to always have some people in it and is especially active when updates go up. If you do not know what IRC is, here is a web based chat version which will not require you to register or download anything: http://chat.mibbit.com/
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Jun 21, 2019 01:34
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Zero chance anyone sells that horse. We can potentially steal it, but our place as an outsider makes that unclear and it's likely they'll just claim he stole it from them. I'm very glad that we did get here though 
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Jun 21, 2019 01:48
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"drat that really was entirely thoughtless and asinine of me," pick up the silver and apologize. "I won't make you scrabble in the dirt. So you wanna go back to the creditors then?"
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Jun 21, 2019 01:53
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G. I'm not against just murdering this dude for his horse after we do this though.
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Jun 21, 2019 01:58
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D
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Jun 21, 2019 02:01
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Diog, are we confident that Igal could kick Erbuke's rear end? If they got into various adversarial situations who would win? Is Igal the kind of guy that would naively get shanked & secret murdered even?
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Jun 21, 2019 02:01
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SniperWoreConverse posted:Diog, are we confident that Igal could kick Erbuke's rear end? If they got into various adversarial situations who would win? Is Igal the kind of guy that would naively get shanked & secret murdered even?
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Jun 21, 2019 02:05
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Add more silver to the pile. And more. And more. Break his will through sheer quantity.
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Jun 21, 2019 02:07
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C, Enkidel Horse-Friend just cannot stand to see a horse parted from its master under such unfortunate circumstances. Really, it's not a theft so much as a liberation anyways. It's morally inexcusable to do anything other than steal this horse at 2 AM.
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Jun 21, 2019 02:12
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Zodiac5000 posted:G. we are not spending a majority of our Mansa Musa riches for a fuckin' horse that will give us a modest amount of map info
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Jun 21, 2019 02:15
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That's what I thought but wanted to be certain. What do you guys think of something like this: We pay off some debts enough that he isn't in immediate danger of death We give Igal a chunk of money in secret or whatever "Wow what a coincidence Igal, we were TOTALLY coincidentally going to go to the same next stop if we could only find a guide with honor who also wants money" Igal gets his chance to try and get to the sunrise with Erbuke's help until the money runs out, we slow walk to the next place with 'em and wing it from there This assumes it's actually possible to calm down the creditors enough that he gets a chance to live and make enough money to pay the rest back later. Can't get paid if he's dead! Better late than never right? If it is feasible probably the employees should be paid for work already done first, idk seems more "good" than paying than gambling debts, but 
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Jun 21, 2019 02:16
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G Imagine if someone took Snuls away from us. That's what this guy is going through right now. The least we can do is hire him on at a more than fair price, refinance his debt and have him work it off importing Grassland goods for us.
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Jun 21, 2019 02:18
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I, all of these options are a hassle for extremely questionable gains, House Legitimate Businessmen can keep the fuckin' horse, tough cookies Rando Kazdack Capitalist. Maybe you'll be an object lesson in the mythology to not bet against Enkidel,
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Jun 21, 2019 02:19
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G is completely fuckin' stupid, it's more than fifty percent of our preposterous amount of cash
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Jun 21, 2019 02:20
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GreyjoyBastard posted:I, all of these options are a hassle for extremely questionable gains, House Legitimate Businessmen can keep the fuckin' horse, tough cookies Rando Kazdack Capitalist. So what you're saying is always bet on blackl
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Jun 21, 2019 02:22
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J. Eat Him to gain his knowledge
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Jun 21, 2019 02:22
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D. Go to the compound of House Ganaive here and try to talk to them, even if they refused to sell the horse to Uriah and Igal, perhaps Enkidel the Horse Friend can apply some Horse Friend charm to get them to sell it or cut a deal with you?
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Jun 21, 2019 02:22
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Erbuke, have you ever been involved with the slave trade?
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Jun 21, 2019 02:26
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Crazycryodude posted:C, Enkidel Horse-Friend just cannot stand to see a horse parted from its master under such unfortunate circumstances. Really, it's not a theft so much as a liberation anyways. It's morally inexcusable to do anything other than steal this horse at 2 AM. This sounds fine to me. We already pulled some absurd Katamari loot run, why not add a horse to the list? Also if he won't give us the information we have a really nice horse when we're done.
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Jun 21, 2019 02:26
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I
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Jun 21, 2019 02:36
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D o the thing with the talking and perhaps dancing I don't want us to push this to use against him, El knows there are many fools in this world but this part of Enkidel recognizes that animal companions are important.
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Jun 21, 2019 02:46
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Can we gauge just how big of a trader this guy was before he gambled it all away? Trading is a family business right? How high was he in his family? Their trade route? If he got saved from all his debts would his family network be in Enkidel's debt? Ask Igal to elaborate on Yafa's bloodline and if she is big enough to carry Enkidel. Ask broke trader if Yafa as a special horse would not be scared if people carried her on their backs? What are the drawbacks of plan H? None seem to jump out for me except that it might not work.
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Jun 21, 2019 02:52
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C - We've just looted the tower belonging to an ancient god and carted a ludicrous amount of loot out over a series of ludicrously high walls. Why are people even worried about this? Also LOL at the Kadmonim being the Urian equivalent of MLP fanbois.
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Jun 21, 2019 02:57
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So how much debt is this guy in? If we pay his debts would that be less than what we'd have to pay to straight up buy the horse from its new owners? Because i can totally imagine someone taking the horse as payment of a much lesser debt.
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Jun 21, 2019 02:59
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If it were Snarls, we'd already be drafting up plans for the heist. C., Grand Theft Equine
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Jun 21, 2019 02:59
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GreyjoyBastard posted:we are not spending a majority of our Mansa Musa riches for a fuckin' horse that will give us a modest amount of map info Why not? What else are we going to do with it than get something priceless?
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Jun 21, 2019 03:03
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G
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Jun 21, 2019 03:08
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D? "oh for fucks sake, sit there, we'll get you your bloody horse back" And then stomp off to go speak to the guys and see if they'll sell it to us, and if our silver tongue (or our actual silver) doesn't work, well I guess we're stealing a horse?
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Jun 21, 2019 03:13
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Is there any way the horse could conceivably escape on its own? Maybe we could just Ask the horse nicely to jump out of its pen and come with us. It's not stealing if the horse comes voluntarily!
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Jun 21, 2019 03:15
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Nettle Soup posted:D? "oh for fucks sake, sit there, we'll get you your bloody horse back" There Bias Two posted:Is there any way the horse could conceivably escape on its own? Maybe we could just Ask the horse nicely to jump out of its pen and come with us. It's not stealing if the horse comes voluntarily! Can we combine these two options?
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Jun 21, 2019 03:22
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Wrongvoters and Tsyni. Everyone who isn't voting to just bail him out, why? this is apparently as secret as the secrets of blooded men, the powers that kings pass down, and we aren't likely to get access to them any other way. If we bail him out and get his horse, sure, it's a substantial part of our wealth, but what exactly do you plan on spending it on? you can't buy their secrets outside of this man's ludicous debts and loss of a horse. Why on earth did we log a rediculous katamari of wealth across the world if not to use it the one time we have an actual chance to buy hereditary, honor-bound secrets from the kadmonim?
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Jun 21, 2019 03:23
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I don't feel bad for this man and he lost his life on betting against Enkidel Horse Friend. There are other ways to get information.
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Jun 21, 2019 03:32
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There Bias Two posted:Is there any way the horse could conceivably escape on its own? Maybe we could just Ask the horse nicely to jump out of its pen and come with us. It's not stealing if the horse comes voluntarily! Basscop posted:So how much debt is this guy in? Basscop posted:If we pay his debts would that be less than what we'd have to pay to straight up buy the horse from its new owners? Polgas posted:Can we gauge just how big of a trader this guy was before he gambled it all away? Polgas posted:Trading is a family business right? How high was he in his family? Their trade route? Polgas posted:Ask Igal to elaborate on Yafa's bloodline and if she is big enough to carry Enkidel. Polgas posted:Ask broke trader if Yafa as a special horse would not be scared if people carried her on their backs? Crazycryodude posted:Erbuke, have you ever been involved with the slave trade?
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Jun 21, 2019 03:35
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cat_herder posted:Can we combine these two options?
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Jun 21, 2019 03:36
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