CLICK SOME FUCKING COOKIES

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > CLICK SOME FUCKING COOKIES

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Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Cookies.

# ¿ Aug 27, 2013 23:03

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# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 16:33

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Gormless Gormster posted:

I will create a new currency that will compete with and crush bitcoins. It will be exchangeable into every real world currency AND bitcoins. It will attract investors with its deliciously warm chocolate scents and excellent craftsgrandmaship.

I shall call them cookoins.

You can fill your bank account with cookoins, and feel like an idiot when you realize they are worthless because no one cares about anything other than pure cookies.

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 02:45

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

For those of you wondering the neverclick achievement only took 3 hours.

edit: actually more like 2 if I had been paying more attention.

Leadthumb fucked around with this message at 07:24 on Aug 28, 2013

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 07:19

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Giggily posted:

I have 200 milk and it's raspberry juice instead.

Same, I don't even know what's happening anymore.

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 18:40

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Anyone know if you do a reset and keep your achievements, do you keep your milk?

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 19:08

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Bash Ironfist posted:

Are granma's worth keeping? Are there things not worth investing money into?

I guess you could sell your grandmas off after you tire of them, you monster.

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 21:48

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

COOKIES!

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 22:07

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

But Rocks Hurt Head posted:

Just bought a time machine which pushed me over 100 million cps which gave me an achievement which increased my milk % giving me even higher cps.

gently caress yeah.

Jeeze, I'm only at 42million CpS right now, sigh...
#firstworldcookieproblems

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 22:11

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

legendsuper posted:

No really, am I the only one here caring for loving spoilers ? I just want to bake my cookies with that extra spark called surprise !

Spoiler alert! There will be new ways to get more cookies!

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 22:25

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

I saw one of the bulletins said exposure to portals causes rapid aging and obsession with baking.
The grandmas are coming, and they have us terraforming our universe for them.

Better make as many cookies as I can before the invasion!

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 22:34

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

bef posted:

If I left for work hours ago and the cookie universe reset is my cookie empire in danger??

Don't you get it? Your cookie empire IS the danger!

I can't stop making cookies, but those of you who are strong enough to resist the urge, you must hurry!

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 23:00

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Bash Ironfist posted:

I don't know why I'm playing this. I've been doing it all day. Cookies aren't even that delicious. God help me, I'm clicking the cookie.

I'm sorry your friends and family have only exposed you to gross cookies your whole life.

Buy an 11oz. bag of nestle chips and use the recipe on the back of the bag, it's a good'n.

(go a little heavy on the vanilla)

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 23:08

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Awesome! posted:

I'm sorry you use crappy chips and don't chop up a good baking bar into chunks.

That recipe isn't bad though.

cookie-

I picked it because it's accessible and takes little effort.

The idea of someone thinking cookies aren't that great leads me to believe they only eat dry safeway/nabisco packaged cookies at family gatherings or something.

edit: After paying close attention to the golden cookie flat amount bonus, I am pretty sure it adds %10 of your current total cookies. Which is actually a massive increase if you have the patience not to spend any while you rack them up.

Leadthumb fucked around with this message at 23:29 on Aug 28, 2013

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 23:24

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Awesome! posted:

This is truth. I like to make a ton of batter, wrap scoops of it in wax paper and freeze them. Then I can make like 3 cookies fresh whenever I want.

Not 50 million a second but still good.

I used to make these peanut butter ball cookies that you freeze, and then you can just eat them. They would never really freeze, they would still be doughy.
I can't remember the recipe now though.

News: Feint meowing heard around local cookie facilities, suggests testing of new ingredient... WTF game!

Leadthumb fucked around with this message at 23:43 on Aug 28, 2013

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 23:32

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Spooky Bear Ghost posted:

It spawns randomly on your screen then starts to fade, giving you either a flat bonus (which is poo poo) or it doubles your production for a hot minute (which is awesome)

If you save up, the flat %10 bonus will be much, much more than an extra minute of your CpS.

If my math is right saving for 600 seconds is the mark where the %10 bonus will only become more and more valuable over the 2x bonus.
While you are spending you want the 2x, but while you are saving for a big upgrade, the flat bonus cookie will get incredibly valuable.

I am going to never spend past 600 times my CpS, that way I will still get the benefit of the 2x since that doesn't change, but anytime I get the flat bonus it will actually be crazy good.

Leadthumb fucked around with this message at 23:51 on Aug 28, 2013

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 23:49

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

I used to be able to see how many Golden Cookies I have missed, did they patch that out?

edit: News: Cookie manufacturer completely forgoes common sense, let's OCD dictate manufacturing decisions!

Leadthumb fucked around with this message at 00:22 on Aug 29, 2013

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 00:19

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

death .cab for qt posted:

Okay yeah I 've had this fucker running on my second monitor for a little over 24 hours now and I still haven't seen any golden cookies. Is it tiny or something?

they go away if you don't get them and sometimes they are halfway off the srceen.
As for size they are a bit bigger than the store icons, or 1/4 the size of the big clickable cookie.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 00:35

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

death .cab for qt posted:

Alright, well, gently caress it then. I'm already at 176,000,000CPS, I don't need those dumb golden cookies anONE LITERALLY JUST APPEARED AND I MISSED IT BECAUSE I WAS poo poo TALKING THEM, gently caress ME

Also it's worth noting that at 7 and 27 golden cookies you can increase their spawn rate.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 00:52

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

death .cab for qt posted:

It's a good thing I've gotten 0 of them so far

Somebody needs to take my and add in a little hand holding a vegetable of some kind instead of a gun. That's the true cookie suicide.

In the spirit of the game it would just be another cookie in his hand.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 00:57

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

I am genuinely annoyed now when the golden cookie gives me the 2xCsP bonus.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 01:18

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Maha posted:

Alright, I think there's a ceiling of 93 574 290 748 for the flat value gold cookie; I got that with ~1 121 000 000 000 and then again with ~1 242 000 000 000. No reason to save above 936b, then.

e: nevermind, just got 96b at only a trillion sixty billion.

Cookie clicker: nevermind, just got 96b at only a trillion sixty billion.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 03:38

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

JGBeagle posted:

Just clicked a golden cookie that gave me x7 CPS for 77 seconds.

Sadly that still wouldn't be worth more than the %10 cookie for me.

That sounds cool though.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 19:31

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

CJacobs posted:

OH MY GOD, NO, I HAVE TO CLICK THE COOKIES

It's like losing a part of yourself.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 19:35

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Spiffo posted:

It's still pretty rad, yeah. 7x instead of 2x owns.

It is more cookies, so it's ok in my book.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 19:43

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Spiffo posted:

No, keep refreshing. You can bake real cookies once the counter is rolling again.

edit: News: Known universe now jammed with cookies. No vacancies!

Oh my god gggiiimmmppp was right what have I done

And you will still get the celebrity saying they have never eaten a cookie ever. How is this possible when the very air is now cookies! My immersion!!!

edit: does anyone know if the hacked in cookies achievement counts toward your milk%?

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 20:01

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

ARACHNOTRON posted:

too many cookies are being clicked. please stop. save some for the rest of us.

I will never stop.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 20:34

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

I wish I could shut off the cookie frenzy bonus, and only get the flat cookie bonus.
Even at 7x it's still nothing once you have trillions of cookies.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 20:51

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Attestant posted:

Are you saying the kaiju in Pacific Rim were some kind of... Cookie Monsters?

Have you seen the "How?" achievement icon?

Spiffo posted:

I'm still getting flat bonuses in addition to the 7x. No more 2x though.

I am too, but whenever the golden cookie is the 7x one, it's basically a complete waste when it could have been the other bonus.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 20:53

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

BowieFett posted:

The website is down and I can't access my cookies. I'm trying to remember what I did before I discovered how wonderful it was to click cookies, but as I try to piece it all together, everything has been clouded with...cookies. I think I had a dog in here somewhere, and there was a woman. I think she was my--no, I can't be bothered with that now. I just need the cookies to come back.

She was your grandma and she is so proud of you for baking cookies. She will be more proud of you if you make cookies faster.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 21:24

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

Dauntasa posted:

Go there. Go there and end the madness.

Would you have the strength? Would you destroy it?

Leadthumb fucked around with this message at 23:22 on Aug 29, 2013

# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 23:17

Leadthumb: Mar 24, 2006

senae posted:

code:
var moni=Math.min(Game.cookies*0.1,Game.cookiesPs*60*30)+13;
This is the actual line of code ran when you get a multiplication golden cookie, it's definitely the lower of the two.

The plain english version of that is:
code:
Make variable moni equal to the lowest of:
   Current cookies*0.1 or cookies/second*60*30
then + 13
Where moni is what gets added to your cookie count.

Why does it keep increasing slowly without any increase in my CpS?

# ¿ Aug 30, 2013 18:25