More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

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Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Gounads posted:

Our bank doesn't have a SWIFT code. Try explaining that to a foreign company who wants to give you money.

Are you sure it's a bank?

# ¿ Sep 7, 2016 16:57

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 01:53

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Dick Trauma posted:

Maybe the new boss is like mine and simply won't give you a review. Although I did receive a bonus check not only did my boss not give it to me until the following April (she forgot because she "went on a ski trip") when she brought it to me it was a delivery, and nothing more. No "this is in recognition of your bla bla bla" or "keep up the good work." It was no different than the UPS guy dropping off a package. She said "Here is a bonus check" and I thanked her and she left. I've had no feedback about my performance in the year and a half I've been here. None, other than my continued employment.

No reviews and a bonus.

This is a good thing.

# ¿ Oct 4, 2016 21:50

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Sharepoint is poo poo to the point of I go out of my way to not use it and slam it every turn whenever someone recommends it at work.

# ¿ Aug 1, 2017 12:30

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

DT, please stop giving a poo poo, get the help you need (you are working on this, this is good), and get a new job.

# ¿ Aug 3, 2017 16:14

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Good man, learn it good.

# ¿ Aug 3, 2017 16:28

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

You are not blowing it out of proportion, the verbal abuse and the mime physical abuse is totally out of order.

Get your new job soon.

# ¿ Aug 3, 2017 18:05

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Sirotan please read the goon in the well story, your indecision about what to do is slowly turning you into the goon in the well.

# ¿ Aug 4, 2017 18:28

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

That's less than it cost to wire up my house.

Wow your colleagues are idiots.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2017 15:43

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Dick Trauma posted:

Management has spent almost a year dithering about extending our HQ into an adjoining space on this floor. I had to force my way into the planning process to make sure there would be space for the network rack. It's my only request.

Guess what's missing from the final final FINAL extra FINAL we really mean FINAL plans?

EDIT: Also the office manager has been tasked with putting cubicles into a large corner office since we're so short on space. I've seen his proposals and none of them include electrical or networking. There is one electrical outlet (near the door) and one network drop in the far corner next to a column. Hope people like extension cords and cables all over the floor.

Stop giving a poo poo. Also, when they gently caress up, make sure you provide documented proof of them ignore your requests for electrical and networking.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2017 17:01

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Wow. That guy is an idiot in many different ways.

# ¿ Aug 20, 2017 10:58

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Dear god that greybeard sounds horrible. We had one guy who straight up refused to do any work, at which point I said to him that's fine, just let your manager know and he'll assign a different developer.

That got him working, grudgingly.

# ¿ Aug 22, 2017 08:59

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Peachfart posted:

Ask him about 'the cloud'.

Yes. Please do this.

# ¿ Aug 24, 2017 10:39

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Are they faster / more responsive with the cards instead of spinning disks?

# ¿ Sep 4, 2017 09:05

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Nice chill right there.

Good Dick, good!

# ¿ Sep 5, 2017 18:31

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Do you mean forklift?

Not a lift that carries people up and down floors in a building? It'd be odd to have to plug that one in...

# ¿ Sep 16, 2017 15:23

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Wow, the owner's brother really is quite precious...

# ¿ Sep 16, 2017 15:35

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Dicktrauma, your CEO is an idiot man child.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2017 17:25

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Virigoth posted:

Things not pissing me off: I get to destroy our Stage AWS environment today so we can save like 250k a year.
Things pissing me off: Someone on another team just sent me an e-mail after multiple notices for the last 45 days saying they are still migrating stuff out of there.
Things not pissing me off: I told them no and they had 90 minutes until the 10:00 start time that was advertised.

We are going to need an update after 10:00 about the fallout from this.

I'm hoping for none.

I expect loads.

# ¿ Oct 3, 2017 15:32

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Virigoth posted:

So I was in the middle of a meeting about getting a long standing problem fixed that sprung up again with my boss and the other team. I've been getting alerts for as the on-call person this week and the last fix 3 months ago was "raise the limit in AWS while we work on our fix". Guess what? It isn't fixed still. I had them giving me a short term fix by the end of the week to clear the alerts and a timeline of next Friday to follow up with the final fix they've been working on for 3 months but it was stuck in testing now(what?). The guy is starting to agree and say I'm reasonable and that sounds great and my boss lobs the "Well if you can't make that deadline we can just ask to get the limit doubled again" into the meeting. The guy said he hopes he can make the deadline but we should be ready to raise the limit. gently caress.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Knew it.

Sorry man.

# ¿ Oct 4, 2017 17:19

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

pixaal posted:

This person has worked here since January, they work remote. Every Monday they forget how to use the phone. This week they had no internet until today. It gets to me because they insist they dial 9 when anyone asks and no one else bothers to check call logs and assumes someone wouldn't lie about this.

It says that extension is invalid? you don't say! 1708 isn't valid! You dialed more than that? It routed you internally because you didn't dial 9 first. I'm looking at it please hang up and call back if a redial doesn't work. I've been told by her to stop disabling her ability to dial out every week and it's "not funny" anymore. She suddenly remembers after I talk to her apparently.

She is in sales and makes hundreds of calls a week. I don't get how you forget this poo poo every week.

I get that saving face is a thing people do, but stop blindly charging ahead when you know I have logs. Ticketing system has 38 tickets made by me and assigned to me with her not knowing how to get an outside line.

Sometimes she forgets the 1, which is understandable because it sometimes works other times it doesn't seems random. She's also tried to just dial the last 4 to get someone in her town which doesn't connect and even if it did would be someone else because we are in a different state and would use our number as the basis.

This should never even get to me.

Escalate it to her manager to teach her how to use a phone.

# ¿ Oct 4, 2017 17:20

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Virigoth posted:

This is a different project. The one from yesterday that went great continues to have gone great. Don't lose faith comrade.

Woohoo! Nice one mate!

# ¿ Oct 4, 2017 21:03

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Attestant posted:

We had a new employee start less than a month ago, who was incredibly demanding about the hardware assigned to them, for their entirely mundane office job. They requested the highest end $1500 laptop we have available for normal users, and complained about their basic free android phone (read: Didn't get a free 2016-2017 iPhone, that are usually reserved for administrative roles.)

Three weeks later we get the HR notification that this person is leaving the company. We also get an email from the user herself requesting we flatten the devices, so that they can keep them when they leave. (Should be OK since there's no company data on them anymore!!)

We follow up with a quick "Hell no." reply (that includes their supervisor/soon-to-be-ex-supervisor). Later they come by at the IT in a huff and angrily leave the devices without saying a word, and walk out.

What on earth were they expecting? Is this some sort of scam were people surf companies for free hardware? What the heck?

What sort of idiot expects to keep their work hardware?

How old was this moron? Why did he leave?

# ¿ Oct 18, 2017 08:56

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

ratbert90 posted:

Lmbo, my coworker has been wanting a 20k raise for the last year and the company kept saying "We don't have the money to do so."

Three days ago they came to us and said: "We are going to hire a new developer and the budget is 85k." He put in his 2 weeks notice the very same day.

This will put the project I was working on back 6 months at a minimum, costing the company at least 100,000$. I asked my boss "why didn't you just give him the 20,000$ raise, and hire the new guy at 65?" to which the excuse was "If he got a raise we would have to give everybody a raise!"

They also had the balls to ask me to do my coworker's job in the meantime, to which I immediately said in polite terms "gently caress off." I swear to god baby boomers are the god drat worst to work for.

I can't loving wait to

Your company is poo poo, your co-worker did the right thing and you need to :yotj:

ASAP.

# ¿ Jan 11, 2018 16:29

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

You too did the right thing.

# ¿ Jan 11, 2018 16:56

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Thanatosian posted:

What the gently caress?

Lots of offices have partitions between back to back facing desks about a foot white which is just full of cables and stuff, it's easy to lose things down there.

# ¿ Jan 11, 2018 19:00

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Dick Trauma posted:

The CEO's son received a very early call from the construction site of the multi-million dollar home his father is buying for him. Construction people needed access to the site.

This made him so angry he threw his iPhone X across the room, smashing it. So he dropped by to ask Bill to buy him another one.

This is maybe the fourth iPhone he's destroyed during a fit of rage.

How have the CEO and the son not been sued for violence in the workplace and a hostile work environment?

# ¿ Jan 11, 2018 19:00

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

My Cisco phone message light has been flashing for years. gently caress voicemail.

# ¿ Feb 8, 2018 18:50

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

SlowBloke posted:

Stuff that slightly annoys me: one of our users cooked its desktop ssd by having the room heater at full blast with his desktop right in front of the heater. Desktop has full warranty coverage, they'll sort it out.

Stuff that heavily pisses me: My home QNAP rack rails decided that suicide was a good thing and broke one of its retention springs, everything is encased in riveted plastic, leaving me no option for improv fixes and qnap has always being stingy in replacement parts so i'll have to buy it again...

Synology isn�t stingy. I bought a used 716+ off eBay. It was hosed. Got in touch with Synology. It was still under warranty. Sent it to them. They send me back a brand new one.

Get a synology.

# ¿ Feb 27, 2018 18:52

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Please do not make any effort to address the lighting, it's not your problem. It's facilities management's issue.

# ¿ Mar 17, 2018 17:55

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Sorry to hear you have to do that

And to be fair, I have had to eat poo poo in my career in the past, but thankfully not any more.

# ¿ Mar 17, 2018 20:38

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

neogeo0823 posted:

Ah, yeah, during my review, Overseer told me that between October and early March, the amount of time i was late added up to a full day of work. Again, nevermind the amount off time i stayed late. Anyway, here i go. This is going to be the longest work day of my life.

Good luck man, I hope you :yotj:

out of that role soon!

# ¿ Mar 21, 2018 15:45

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Inspector_666 posted:

Huge steaming pile of crap.

They don't want to pay you a bonus, and are looking to fire you so they don't have to pay severance.

:yotj:

time, as you said

# ¿ Mar 21, 2018 15:54

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Judge Schnoopy posted:

Fuuuuccckkkk yyyoooouuuuu forever. That's not my loving job.

Just say no.

# ¿ Mar 23, 2018 22:02

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Judge Schnoopy posted:

I ordered a ton of spare monitors and phones at the beginning of the year thinking I would be set for the first three quarters. They're all gone.

People see spare equipment and can't stop themselves from complaining about arbitrary or non-existent problems until they get the shiny new thing 'sitting there doing nothing'.

Why is your department in an area that is accessible by other employees without being buzzed in?

They should not be able to casually look at what stock you do or do not have, and it is none of their business.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2018 09:43

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

get a different client, they seem way too dysfunctional.

# ¿ Apr 9, 2018 12:23

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

tactlessbastard posted:

Mrs. Bastard thinks that balanced on the arm of the couch, plugged in to an outlet 4 feet away across the pathway to the toy box is the natural habitat of a laptop.

Mrs. Bastard has been getting increasingly cheap replacement laptops.

If she gets one with a long battery life, this is no longer an issue.

# ¿ Apr 12, 2018 14:28

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Bob Morales posted:

We have a TV in the reception area that plays images from a USB stick in a loop. Company news, visitor greetings, random poo poo. Basically it's a powerpoint exported to a pile of JPG images.

The problem is the USB stick. It's this little cocksucker

What's wrong with it you say? Well, for one it's a a thin connector so you can stick it in either way, and it fits, but only works one way. Also, it has a little button on the side that if you even look at it, it unlocks the connector and it slides back into the case.

The old ladies that sit at the front desk can't stick this fucker in the TV to save their lives. I'm going to throw it in the trash and buy them an easier to use one.

Why on earth hasn�t this already been done?

Why isn�t it a networked TV over IP service instead?

# ¿ Apr 17, 2018 14:54

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Koskun posted:

That reads like they outsourced an audit of the company for a possible sale or restructuring. They want to know what departments and people are critical, and if/when someone leaves (or gets let go) or gets reassigned, how much it will disrupt future plans.

It�s outsourcing related yes.

Just ignore the email if possible and start looking for a new job.

# ¿ Apr 18, 2018 16:06

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

Obsoletely Fabulous posted:

So my boss is scheduling a meeting next week for me to explain why my replacement is so bad. Maybe if you are hiring an �expert� for a system you should actually make sure they know the system? I guess her boss is pushing back on why all of the sudden he is crashing and burning right when I stopped holding his hand. The guy can�t even find an option in a context menu when it is right in his face and I�m telling him the option to pick.

5 more days and none of this will come up again. I�ve pretty much been pushing back at my boss saying none of this is my issue. They hired someone in a different country for 1/20th the cost and then wanted me to transfer 10 years of knowledge and experience via Skype.

gently caress em. Worst they can do is fire me a few days before I quit.

Beautiful, keep the stories coming. Outsourcing is one thing that really pisses me off and I have seen this happen so many times, I am glad that he is crashing and burning and that your idiot boss has to deal with it.

# ¿ Apr 20, 2018 15:57

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 01:53

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

I have done up our house up with great WiFi, Ethernet drops, rock solid networking all around.

Last week, my wife and I overhear the neighbours yelling over the phone about how their WiFi is crap.

Later that evening, the following conversation occurs.

My wife: why don�t you go fix their WiFi for them?
Me: I don�t do tech support.

So yeah, never ever volunteer to fix someone�s computer issues.

Which reminds me, this afternoon this also happened:

Colleague: Steakandchips, my MacBook 2011 stopped working, where can I get spare parts for it?
Me: dunno.
Colleague: Apple are refusing to fix it as they don�t have parts!
Me: ok.
Colleague: what shall I do?
Me: buy a new one.

Steakandchips fucked around with this message at 17:50 on Apr 24, 2018

# ¿ Apr 24, 2018 15:57

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

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