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Arnold of Soissons posted:honestly that last sentence might be the most out of touch w/ reality statement itt. Average age worldwide is like seventeen and a half. Five and a half years behind the curve is really not ridiculous IMO.
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Feb 20, 2014 18:06
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cactuscarpet posted:Average age worldwide is like seventeen and a half. Five and a half years behind the curve is really not ridiculous IMO.
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Feb 20, 2014 18:20
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The being yourself advice assumes you aren't a socially retarded shut-in.
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Feb 20, 2014 18:42
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I'm fat but have had sex which is mind boggling because by all rights I deserve to be a virgin forever. Good thread, take care.
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Feb 20, 2014 18:45
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NomChompsky posted:I'm fat but have had sex which is mind boggling because by all rights I deserve to be a virgin forever. Are you too fat to walk and do you eat 3 pound blocks of cheddar cheese at a time.
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Feb 20, 2014 18:54
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Zack_Gochuck posted:The being yourself advice assumes you aren't a socially retarded shut-in. And if you are?
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Feb 20, 2014 18:54
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serious norman posted:And if you are? Stop
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Feb 20, 2014 18:55
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Zack_Gochuck posted:The being yourself advice assumes you aren't a socially retarded shut-in. I broke out of my rut by actively going out of my way to integrate myself into other social circles. Once I knew the right people things just clicked and I've never really had a problem getting a date since, but its not something that just happened its something I made happen. But that's why I say its something you can't really give advice for if you didn't experience it because really getting laid isn't hard if you hang out with the right people. Those who naturally gravitated towards these social circles simply dont understand how much that had to do with their own experiences and why it doesn't necessarily apply to the guy who enjoys hitting up Friday night magic with his friends.
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Feb 20, 2014 19:06
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cactuscarpet posted:Average age worldwide is like seventeen and a half. Five and a half years behind the curve is really not ridiculous IMO. that's so stupid. so by that logic someone who had sex when they were 12 was just a bit ahead of the curve? the first dozen + years are (should be) totally sex-free so counting the years from birth and saying "oh from 17 to 23 isn't that far" is disingenuous. from onset of puberty to virginity loss is X years, and the average value for X is (probably) about 3 or 4. from the onset of puberty to 23 is about 10-12 years, so like 3x as long. it's fine to be a late bloomer, but pretending that it's normal to be 20+ and a virgin is either stupid or damaged thinking.
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Feb 20, 2014 19:08
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ChairMaster posted:Are you too fat to walk and do you eat 3 pound blocks of cheddar cheese at a time. Nah.
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Feb 20, 2014 19:12
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Get better hobbies that aren't sitting around a table with other fat nerdy virgin men.
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Feb 20, 2014 19:16
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Fried Watermelon posted:Get better hobbies that aren't sitting around a table with other fat nerdy virgin men.
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Feb 20, 2014 19:17
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ArbitraryC posted:Plenty of older virgins aren't shut ins though, I know I had plenty of friends and did social stuff all the time with them. The problem is for those social circles the stuff everyone enjoys is like tabletop gaming or watching anime or whatever, they hang out with each other but don't naturally meet more people (well they meet more nerdy guys) . My entire group of high school friends were all virgins. Its entirely possible to be a sociable friendly person and just run in a crowd that won't ever get you laid which is why the it'll happen eventually advice is so dumb. Zack_Gochuck posted:The being yourself advice assumes you aren't a socially retarded shut-in. I have yet to meet anyone who is hardcore into table top gaming who isn't absolutely socially retarded. I'm not saying it's impossible, I'm just saying I've never seen it. I knew a guy who was into it in college, and it was all he was capable of talking about. Zack_Gochuck fucked around with this message at 19:25 on Feb 20, 2014 |
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Feb 20, 2014 19:23
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These people aren't socially retarded shutins though, they simply have different interests for their hobbes/free time and less opportunities to date through their friends.
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Feb 20, 2014 19:27
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Arnold's obsessive calculations... What? Why are you so upset? The earliest friend of mine to have sex was 18, the oldest 26, and they are completely normal well adjusted people. If you are an otherwise pretty normal person, no one worth knowing is going to give a gently caress that you're a virgin. Once you actually do it a couple times, you'll realize your fears and weird expectations were unfounded. If you work on your confidence and anxiety and talk to dateable people, it'll happen. Like someone else said, most sexually active people have had enough lovely sex in their lives that you'd have to do something outrageously wrong for them to find it noteworthy. I'm wondering if the virgins in this thread are drinkers. I have no experience dating in the sober world, but I imagine it would add some awkwardness to the whole thing.
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Feb 20, 2014 19:35
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What if I received a happy ending that I didn't request, yet felt obligated to pay for?
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Feb 20, 2014 19:37
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rawdog pozfail posted:What if I received a happy ending that I didn't request, yet felt obligated to pay for? Offer them dinner and a movie.
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Feb 20, 2014 19:58
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rawdog pozfail posted:What if I received a happy ending that I didn't request, yet felt obligated to pay for? Ask them to marry you.
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Feb 20, 2014 19:59
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Sex is a lot like a box of chocolates, theres a lot of different konds but eventually you get sick of only eating the caramels and want to try a new kind that looks interesting but really its the marshmellow raspberry (loving gross) and you wish you kind of really never tried it at all. What I'm saying is that anal sex in the end looks a lot like the cross section of a marshmellow raspberry chocolate, which is again very gross.
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Feb 20, 2014 21:11
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lol @ fagoons who refuse to do anal. Are you kidding me? And no, you're still a virgin until you partake in penetrative sex. End of story. I was a late bloomer, losing my V-card at 19. Does that mean I got my first blowjob? A handy? Hell nah. Fuckin' sex. And it rocked and she came. That was when I stopped being a virgin. Don't delude yourselves. edit: I had gotten handies and blow-jay-jay's before I lost the v-card. Still considered myself a Virg' till I submerged, ya dig? Fuck da Mods fucked around with this message at 22:49 on Feb 20, 2014 |
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Feb 20, 2014 21:53
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gently caress da Mods posted:lol @ fagoons who refuse to do anal. Are you kidding me? And no, you're still a virgin until you partake in penetrative sex. End of story. Uh-oh, gently caress da Mods says that I'm still a virgin. I guess I'd better believe him.  Neverminding the fact that it's a bit more difficult to find a guy who'll let you gently caress him in the rear end than it is to find a girl to do it vaginally.
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Feb 20, 2014 22:18
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JFairfax posted:How would you male virgoons feel about loosing your virginity to a woman who had previously with 53 different guys? Waddap, guy! Halloween virginity loss, checking in. Everything from the neck down was fantastic looking, but that slag had the worst overbite and a dead look in her eyes. Her chin sorta looked like a nutless ballsack. I made out with her on my wooden dorm room rocking chair for what seemed like an hour, before climbing up into my lofted bed to gently caress her with hardly enough room between the bed and ceiling. I really feel as though I have ignorance to thank for my first dick-in-the-snatch gently caress. There was no thought process beyond... 1) Consume as much liquor as possible 2) Oh look, she wants to go home with me, guess she wants to gently caress. 3) We're making out on my chair, I'll do this for a while, then ask if she wants to have sex. 4) I'll lay here and hope to god she just jams it in herself. It was probably just as bad for her as it was for me. I slipped out a bunch of times and hadn't a goddamn clue. The sad part was when we called it quits and she asked "So am I ever gonna hear from you, after tonight?" to which my response was "Yea, why wouldn't you?" She blew up my phone constantly and scolded me for not replying to her texts, in the middle of statistics class. I can hardly remember how we broke it off after a week, but we did and she was bitter. I could have cared less, which brings me to this... Veryslightlymad posted:I think the worst part is how ungrateful some people are about it. Like they don't realize that another person has given them a gift, and they should be goddamned thankful for it. Playing with, loving, sharing happiness with another human being ought to be the easiest thing in the world, but it's not. Show some drat respect. I seriously envy those times. I never had sex with my first girlfriend, but it was like we were both constantly high on raging hormones. We would hug, kiss, cuddle and screw around in every way possible, minus penetration. It was like every lame, romantic cliche. I loved looking into her eyes, her smile, hair, body, everything. It really was like a teen hearthrob drama. Now I'm an experienced adult, incapable of feeling any of that. A dream girl could walk right in, hug me and I'd probably be all "Where's the knife, I gotta crush this perc. gently caress, coulda sworn I had a few beers left in the fridge." Maybe I just haven't been in real love. Who the hell knows? cname fucked around with this message at 22:42 on Feb 20, 2014 |
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Feb 20, 2014 22:28
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Be yourself, unless you're lovely and stupid. Words to get laid by.
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Feb 20, 2014 22:43
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4th Asclepiadean posted:Uh-oh, gently caress da Mods says that I'm still a virgin. I guess I'd better believe him. But she came, bro. or said she did to make it seem less awkward
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Feb 20, 2014 22:45
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4th Asclepiadean posted:Neverminding the fact that it's a bit more difficult to find a guy who'll let you gently caress him in the rear end than it is to find a girl to do it vaginally. Never have falser words been spoken
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Feb 20, 2014 22:47
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True fact: the more you say the phrase "blow jay jays", the less likely you are to get them. Fact that all the sex havers don't want you to know.
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Feb 20, 2014 23:14
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Hand beezy
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Feb 20, 2014 23:48
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gently caress da Mods posted:lol @ fagoons who refuse to do anal. Are you kidding me? And no, you're still a virgin until you partake in penetrative sex. End of story. It's so cripplingly obvious you're talking out your rear end I think a couple of times I've had sex just got obliterated from history due to the sheer virgin aura emanating from your post.
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Feb 20, 2014 23:48
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gently caress da Mods posted:lol @ fagoons who refuse to do anal. Are you kidding me? And no, you're still a virgin until you partake in penetrative sex. End of story. didn't know until this post that it was possible to have actual penetrative sex and still be a virgin
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Feb 20, 2014 23:49
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Synonamess Botch posted:didn't know until this post that it was possible to have actual penetrative sex and still be a virgin Oh, he had penetrative sex. You can penetrate your hand, yeah?
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Feb 21, 2014 00:05
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Synonymous posted:It's so cripplingly obvious you're talking out your rear end I think a couple of times I've had sex just got obliterated from history due to the sheer virgin aura emanating from your post.
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Feb 21, 2014 00:49
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virgin vir·gin [vur-jin] noun 1. a person who has never had sexual intercourse. 2. an unmarried girl or woman. 3. Ecclesiastical . an unmarried, religious woman, especially a saint. 4. the Virgin, Mary, the mother of Christ. 5. Informal. any person who is uninitiated, uninformed, or the like: He's still a virgin as far as hard work is concerned. sex·u·al in·ter·course noun 1. sexual contact between individuals involving penetration, esp. the insertion of a man's erect penis into a woman's vagina, typically culminating in orgasm and the ejaculation of semen.
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Feb 21, 2014 01:00
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bill clinton says you're still a virgin
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Feb 21, 2014 01:01
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Starter Wiggin posted:Oh, he had penetrative sex. You can penetrate your hand, yeah? Stigmata handjobs are the best handjobs.
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Feb 21, 2014 01:51
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Wesphalia posted:I don't want to be this way, but I don't have what it takes to change. You do want to be that way, that's why you make claims about not having 'what it takes to change.' Statements like that are never accurate or based on reality, they are something someone tells themselves because its often way easier to stay in a rut, even if that rut is depressing them.
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Feb 21, 2014 02:06
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For those of us who are straight girl-nerds, having relationships with our peers at the age of 22 or 23 consists of a wide variety of dudes like the ones in this thread, which is why as per the OP's request I would like to say that it's pretty chill being an adult virgin, I can give myself baller orgasms and I don't have to put up with a clingy bf who thinks that his sense of personal value can only be found within my vagina
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Feb 21, 2014 02:51
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Tjadeth posted:For those of us who are straight girl-nerds, having relationships with our peers at the age of 22 or 23 consists of a wide variety of dudes like the ones in this thread, which is why as per the OP's request I would like to say that it's pretty chill being an adult virgin, I can give myself baller orgasms and I don't have to put up with a clingy bf who thinks that his sense of personal value can only be found within my vagina How much do u weigh lol
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Feb 21, 2014 03:31
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Sexgun Rasputin posted:sex·u·al in·ter·course Does this make all women virgins?
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Feb 21, 2014 03:38
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Tjadeth posted:a clingy bf who thinks that his sense of personal value can only be found within my vagina well is he wrong? 
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Feb 21, 2014 03:38
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Sex is impossible, I can't find anything on GameFAQs.
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