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take the moon
Feb 12, 2011



it would be cool to have something drawn from mine

i think im number 7 to ask tho

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tentacleDate
Jun 11, 2015

THUNDERDOME LOSER

curlingiron posted:

I'm also offering to illustrate scenes from five people's stories (maybe more if I feel like it) from last week, if you want to volunteer. Results to be posted when I finish them, and they will all be lovely phone pics, so buyer volunteer beware, I guess.

Edit: I get to choose what scene, and I reserve the right to turn all of your characters into giant talking penises if I hate your story.

If can, can. If no can, bottles.

dreadmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk

IT'S JUDGMENT DAY



The robots have risen, murder in their photovoltaic receptors and loathing in their weirdly anachronistic i860 RISC arrays. Loathing for flesh, sunshine, love, and terrible prose. This week was fertile ground for at least one of those things.

That said, there were a lot of bad stories but regrettably and rage-inducingly most of them were only bad-ish; to the point that I and my slavering judge cohort were filled with scheissenbedauern, a made up german word meaning literally 'poo poo regret'.

Nonetheless we are resourceful and found some scapegoats to stake out for the murderbots, aside from screaming idiot who can cop a DQ for going over the wordlimit.

Wriggling on the napalm scarred earth ready for their DM are kurona_bright, who gave us a stupefyingly trite tale of a woman walking up stairs, and swarm, who needs to learn that IT'S IS ONLY EVER SHORT FOR IT IS MOTHERFUCKER and also to write better words. Broenheim would be on this list but there was some debate about whether his piece on anime sexbots was hilarious dumb or just regular dumb.

We took it to corner judge tdbot who was in the process of being flattered by, hm, yes Broenheim:

quote:

Broenheim actually the best judge is tdbot
TDbot Milo lets out a roar, playing the role of King of the Dinosaurs just like his daddy taught him.
sebmojo tdbot, anime?
TDbot She spoke, quietly but clearly.
sebmojo yes tdbot, but what did she say
TDbot Because you're always talking to someone else!
Kaishai TDbot. Rule from on high.
TDbot Think we might get signed?
sittinghere tdbot will you dive sideways screaming animeeeeeee
TDbot We stalked the city like predators.
Kaishai NOT AT THIS RATE.
sittinghere tdbot is almost as bad as crabrock at judging
sebmojo tdbot should i be firm in my decision to dm the bad story
TDbot You don't want those.
sittinghere see?!

Through the random computational mercies of tdbot, Broenheim escapes the DM.

There were a few more options for places on the armoured zeppelin fleeing the robo-horde; we chose ironic twist, we landed on the moon! and doktor kloktopussy. Clinging onto a trailing rope is an astonished spectres of autism. Keep climbing and hold tight to that HM.

The loser this week, ground zero for the robocalypse, is tentacledate with a terrible and pointless tale of unmotivated murder and canned chili. Words tolerable, story too dumb even for this gonzo company.

And finally, the victor, roped to the flagpole atop the Capitol, roaring defiance at the hateful metal onslaught with a chattering minigun in each hand?

Obliterati.

WLOTM is judging next week, but a co-judge slot just opened up; I can feel it in my waters.

dreadmojo fucked around with this message at Aug 12, 2015 around 00:16

flerp
Feb 25, 2014


PROMPT

Mons Hubris
Aug 29, 2004

fanci flup




Aw man

dreadmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk

I am ed to enter the next three weeks, and I will also throw down a to crit all the stories this week by 22 August 2359 PST, either full crits or judgeburps.

a new study bible!
Feb 1, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly




THUNDERDOME CLVIII: ...LIKE NO ONE EVER WAS

We’ve been talking lots about anime lately, so it's about time that you battle in the honor of one of one of the most well written animes of all time, Pokemon.

I have fond memories of Pokemon, both as a game and as a television show. Although I haven’t played a game to completion in close to a decade, I have probably played at least one game in each of the ten or so generations spanning several Nintendo systems. I’d say I am a Pokemaster, or, maybe the title of Pokemon Professor is more apt.

...

Professor WLOTM, at your service!

At the beginning of the first Pokemon game, a lovable old man gifts the plucky youngster, Ash, with a single pokemon of Ash’s choosing. This week, I will do the same for you. Did you know there are 718 721 pokemon?

Choose wisely and quickly… I only have one of each.

*****


The Task: This week, you are going to pick a pokemon and write a story about it. Pretty simple, I’d say; however, there are a few rules:

1. You must post your Pokemuse when you sign up for the week. Posting a small picture would also be nice See, I want to know which Pokemon you are picking because I want to fantasize all week about how disappointed I will be on Sunday evening, once you've squandered the potential of your glorious monster. I will be happy to assign you a Pokemon if desired, and failure to select a pokemon at the time of signup means that I get to pick for you.

2. You may trade pokemon with another domer if you change your mind on your monster. Trading is half the fun.

3. I may assign you a flashrule depending on the pokemon you select. Some pokemon have a special sentimentality to me, and as such, these pokemon come with special requirements. Think of them as a pokelandmine.

4. YOU ARE NOT WRITING ABOUT ACTUAL POKEMON, YOU CHUCKLEFUCKS. If you write about pokemon being real, or fantastic creatures that may be similar to pokemon, or include any references to the pokemon universe, I will automatically DQ/DM/Fail you. DO NOT TEST ME ON THIS.


(But WLOTM, thats confusing>



Don’t be so literal. Also, use this website: http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/all

Look at each pokemon; look at what it loving looks like. It is your muse. Look at the color scheme. Look at its type, weaknesses, strengths, move list, abilities, and, most importantly, its Pokedex entries. There is some hosed up poo poo in those Pokedex entries. Basically, you are welcome to be inspired by the pokemon in any way, so long as you aren’t actually writing about pokemon.

Please don’t gently caress it up.

Wordcount: 1250
Signups Close: Friday, August 14th, at 11:59PM PST
Submissions Due: Sunday, August 16th, at 11:59 PST


Gym Leaders
1. WeLandedOnTheMoon! and Obliterati
2. Flesnolk
3. Broenheim

Pokemon Trainers
1) Djeser- Tropicus
2) Grizzled Patriarch- Slowbro
3) Entenzahn- Dunsparce
4) tentacleDate- Wobbuffet
5) Thranguy- Dugtrio
6) sebmojo- Machoke (One character must be a bodybuilder)
7) Ironic Twist- Zapdos
8) Screaming Idiot- Garbodor (Protag must be an endearing nerd)
9) kurona_bright- Wigglytuff
10) Sitting Here- Mudkip
11) Mons Hubris- Skunktank
12) C7ty1- Musharna
13) Swarm- Sudowoodo
14) Devorum- Drowzee (your character's indecisiveness forces him to deal with an unfortunate circumstance)
15) TheAnomaly- Snorlax
16) spectres of autism- Haunter
17) PoshAlligator- Probopass (your story must include rad facial hair)
18) Nethilia- Ninetails
19) Jonked- Cacturne
20) Meinberg- Sableeye
21) Tyrannosaurus- Magikarp
22) Benny Profane- Kangaskhan
23) Bompacho- Shiftry
24) J.A.B.C.- Skarmory
25) Killer-of-Lawyers- Doduo
26) Kaishai- Octillery

a new study bible! fucked around with this message at Aug 17, 2015 around 00:35

flerp
Feb 25, 2014


As the Professor Oak of the judges, you can ask me for the pokemans, and I'll give you one. if you aren't a big nerd like me, here's your chance to get a good old pocket monster!

You could get this high quality pokemon:



Or even this classic 'mon (that's what we call pokemon in the competitive pokemon scene):

flerp fucked around with this message at Aug 12, 2015 around 00:04

dreadmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk

meanwhile, in irc, things have taken a turn for the sombre

quote:

sittinghere tdbot how do you feel about your first judging
TDbot No suitable sentences found.
sittinghere yeah
Kaishai That computes.
sittinghere this must be a hard week for tdbot to judge
TDbot Memories of parties where cocaine, silverpaste, and expensive liquor were as common as mud still gnawed at the bag of Carver's brain.
sittinghere same
Kaishai Stop sharing judgeroom secrets, TDbot.
TDbot No thanks.
sittinghere well then you aren't allowed to help anymore
Entenwork TDbot how do you feel about being relieved from judging duty
TDbot You were right.
sittinghere what did you tell him ent
sittinghere what were you right about
sittinghere also tdbot isn't relieved this time
TDbot I'm from a flyover state.
sittinghere nods understandingly
Kaishai Don't you insult the heartland, TDbot.
TDbot Now more than ever I wish I could cry.

Djeser
Mar 22, 2013





In with the Grass/Wind type Tropicus.

Grizzled Patriarch
Mar 27, 2014

These dentures won't stop me from tearing out jugulars in Thunderdome.




In and kickin' it old school with Slowbro.

Entenzahn
Nov 15, 2012

What will you say when
your child asks:
why didn't you invest in
Thunderdome?


Give me a pokemon and make it snappy.

tentacleDate
Jun 11, 2015

THUNDERDOME LOSER

I came when I heard the next prompt was out.

I'm in.

Gimme a pokemon, yo.

Thranguy
Apr 21, 2010

'Read over your compositions, and when you meet a passage which you think is particularly fine, strike it out.' -Samuel Johnson

I'm in need of pokemon assignment too.

dreadmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk

in and give me a nonsensical cartoon creature

flerp
Feb 25, 2014


Entenzahn posted:

Give me a pokemon and make it snappy.

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/dunsparce

flerp fucked around with this message at Aug 12, 2015 around 01:19

Ironic Twist
Aug 3, 2008

THUNDERDOME LOSER



In.

Say hello:

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

The turtle moves.


Fun Shoe

In, give me a lovely cartoon character from a lovely children's cartoon you frothy neckbearded manchild.

kurona_bright
Mar 21, 2013


For any of you sad, sad shriveled prunes who couldn't tell a Plusle from a Minun, here's an article with screwed-up interesting pokemon.

If I were about five years younger, I would probably pick Lugia. But I don't want to sully its good name with my Trubbish-level writing, so could someone else pick for me?

a new study bible!
Feb 1, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


sebmojo posted:

in and give me a nonsensical cartoon creature

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/machoke




Rule: Machoke is a bodybuilder pokemon. One of your characters must be a bodybuilder.

a new study bible! fucked around with this message at Aug 12, 2015 around 00:26

flerp
Feb 25, 2014


tentacleDate posted:

I came when I heard the next prompt was out.

I'm in.

Gimme a pokemon, yo.

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/wobbuffet



Thranguy posted:

I'm in need of pokemon assignment too.

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/dugtrio



Screaming Idiot posted:

In, give me a lovely cartoon character from a lovely children's cartoon you frothy neckbearded manchild.

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/garbodor



flash rule: your main character is a nerd. He must be endearing and likable and not weird.

kurona_bright posted:

For any of you sad, sad shriveled prunes who couldn't tell a Plusle from a Minun, here's an article with screwed-up interesting pokemon.

If I were about five years younger, I would probably pick Lugia. But I don't want to sully its good name with my Trubbish-level writing, so could someone else pick for me?

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/wigglytuff

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


Blood Empress of Thunderdome

Tap to emit spores


Clapping Larry

In to ruin your childhood memories, gimme a pokemon bro

Mons Hubris
Aug 29, 2004

fanci flup




Ok give me a pokeyman

flerp
Feb 25, 2014


Sitting Here posted:

In to ruin your childhood memories, gimme a pokemon bro

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/mudkip



look at how cute this guy is

edit: flash rule: no 4chan or memes

Mons Hubris posted:

Ok give me a pokeyman

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/skuntank

Social Studies 3rd Period
Oct 31, 2012

THUNDERDOME LOSER



In with a for my terrible failure last week.

Give me a Pokemon! This can only end well.

flerp
Feb 25, 2014


C7ty1 posted:

In with a for my terrible failure last week.

Give me a Pokemon! This can only end well.

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/musharna

Swarm
Aug 18, 2014

by XyloJW


In with whatever the christ this thing is:

Sudowoodo

I'll also myself again as a penance for my terrible writing and liberal incorrect use of "it's".

Devorum
Jul 30, 2005


Nap Ghost

In with a promise to try to be better this week!

Requesting a Pokémon! Hopefully not that one with the creepy, dead eyes.

I choose Drowzee!

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/drowzee

Devorum fucked around with this message at Aug 12, 2015 around 02:11

Ironic Twist
Aug 3, 2008

THUNDERDOME LOSER



Devorum posted:

In with a promise to try to be better this week!

Requesting a Pokémon! Hopefully not that one with the creepy, dead eyes.

Who, Jynx?

Devorum
Jul 30, 2005


Nap Ghost


No, Espurr. Had to look it up.

flerp
Feb 25, 2014


Devorum posted:

In with a promise to try to be better this week!

Requesting a Pokémon! Hopefully not that one with the creepy, dead eyes.

I choose Drowzee!

http://pokemondb.net/pokedex/drowzee

flash rule: your character's indecisiveness forces him to deal with an unfortunate circumstance.

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003


Just so everyone knows, I spoke to all the judges in irc by PM and they all agreed that it was Kaishai's fault that judgement was so slow. They said we should all blame her.

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

The turtle moves.


Fun Shoe

newtestleper posted:

Just so everyone knows, I spoke to all the judges in irc by PM and they all agreed that it was Kaishai's fault that judgement was so slow. They said we should all blame her.

And anger an omnicidal killing machine? I think not, friendo.

Kaishai
Nov 3, 2010

Scoffing at modernity.

Screaming Idiot posted:

And anger an omnicidal killing machine? I think not, friendo.

It's as though last week taught him nothing.

crabrock
Aug 2, 2002

aka sticklegs



Grimey Drawer

newtestleper posted:

Just so everyone knows, I spoke to all the judges in irc by PM and they all agreed that it was Kaishai's fault that judgement was so slow. They said we should all blame her.

i don't get credit for nothin' round here

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


Blood Empress of Thunderdome

Tap to emit spores


Clapping Larry

newtestleper posted:

Just so everyone knows, I spoke to all the judges in irc by PM and they all agreed that it was Kaishai's fault that judgement was so slow. They said we should all blame her.

even if that were true, it was only because her superior logic matrix and language-parsing protocols tripped over the inert lump of words you call your fiction

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


Blood Empress of Thunderdome

Tap to emit spores


Clapping Larry

but really it's because crabrock was drunk, he thought your guys' stories were good so we had to wait for him to sober up

Kaishai
Nov 3, 2010

Scoffing at modernity.

crabrock posted:

i don't get credit for nothin' round here

You have the sunniest disposition in the thread, crabrock. Anyone will tell you it is true.

dreadmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk


You avoided a DM by a level of inexplicable mercy too gargantuan to be measured by currently available technology, fyi

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Mons Hubris
Aug 29, 2004

fanci flup




sebmojo posted:

You avoided a DM by a level of inexplicable mercy too gargantuan to be measured by currently available technology, fyi

Aw man

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