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Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Lazy_Liberal posted:

I saw one person mention how it seemed like the girls were coached about what to say in their interviews. Anybody else have input?

"Love broomball. Like spelling. Hate math." X4

Every day of their lives. They've been coached since birth about what to say and how to behave around outsiders who don't understand the special glory of the family and the work it does to secure the kingdom of god on earth. Worldly authority doesn't understand. They are well-meaning and corrupted by the fallen world. These are things we can only talk about inside the family and away from the cameras.

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Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Has anyone mentioned that one of the kids called her vagina a penis holder? That seems even sadder than not knowing what to call it, which none of the other kids seemed able to do:

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



They mean that it's "pee-pee" as in urine and not "pee-pee" as in penis, like the kid is saying that the vagina is where you pee from because she's just a little kid and that's all the significance it has to her, which is refreshingly not creepy.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



You Are A Elf posted:

So is this pic from 1989, or what?

The same year the sister was reported missing and both brothers gained 56 pounds.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



I Hate Huckabee's (fat poo poo garbage son)

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006




I wonder if he'll lose his poo poo to have to answer to a woman directly.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006




love that guy's aviators. You just know he worked in a pool supply store before becoming a winner on gor.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Goobish posted:

Didn't it say somewhere that they're taught that dinosaurs were the "dragons" in the Bible? I don't know I didn't read the whole loving Bible.

There's an episode of their show where they go to a creationism museum. The crew laugh about it and rip on the museum over the credits.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Jim Bob.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



J

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



i

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



m

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



B

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



o

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



b

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Windows 98 posted:

Jim Bob gonna be outed for something good any second. I can feel it.

The unbearable suffering of innocent children has become delightful entertainment to me so suddenly that I didn't even realize it until now. I'm fantasizing about a secret dungeon with an unknown Duggar locked away right now. I can see the news crews and the shot from the CNN chopper team right there in my mind.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Dr. Josef Mengele posted:

How does this thread have almost 5 pages for each kid of some trash folks

Jim Bob

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Crusty Nutsack posted:

I'm pretty sure they still get headaches cause there's no way they're actually having orgasms

If they do it's a week in the shame pit.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Trust in Jesus because only a loving god would allow a child to rape his sisters and get away with it because his father had dirt on a crooked cop who made it all go away. God bless.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Jim Bob

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Also I feel like that has to be wrong because there's never been an original joke on Family Guy. And half of them aren't even jokes, just Lion-O and Family Ties.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



The Bible posted:

Biblically, I think Cherubim are actually four faced creatures with revolving heads.

The fat naked babies are an invention of Catholicism because of course they are.

And despite their radical protestantism, I can think of at least one thing the Duggars have taken from Catholicism.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



KJV also important because it was meant to delegitimate other translations that questioned or challenged the divine right of kings.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Chim Shob

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Gorm Job

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Grim Job

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Jhormm Brrrb

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



One Duggar in a thousand is born a Bob. One in a thousand Bobs may happen to be born a Jim.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Jim Bob

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Jorm Burb

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



D'himm B'qoub

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



My NaMe Is JoSh. I tAkE cArE oF tHe PlAcE wHiLe ThE jIm BoB iS aWaY. tHeRe Is No WaY oUt Of HeRe. It WiLl Be DaRk SoOn. ThErE iS nO wAy OuT oF hErE.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Did anyone make like a True Detective thing about the Duggars? Seems like a good parody opportunity.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Don't forget that they believe god tasked them with going on television to witness to the masses. They think the show made them look good and that it helped them win converts.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



AbbadonOfHell posted:

The Fist of the Jim Bob Star

Legend of the Duggarfiend

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



Rupert Buttermilk posted:

I can't do the whole thing, but I can give you this:

(first verse)
I've got my wife, but my sisters are enticing me
I fooled around, now the media's degrading me
Gawker goes straight for the throat
(I wish I could sail away on daddy's boat)

(pre-chorus)
My fin-gers want to get inside of you!
My boner quivers at the sight of you!
My values are backwards now
The more I am repressed, the more I cry!

Ooooh... And I touched you
Ooooh... And I touched you
Ooooh... And I touched you
Ooooh... And I touched you

You are the perfect Dugg, the perfect Dugg, the perfect Dugg

You are the perfect Dugg, the perfect Dugg, the perfect Dugg

etc...

Now do "Power of Dug."

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



He was positively identified and interviewed before he died. The rare successful goon project.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



He's no joke like a folk hero. There are a thousand tales of the goatman, and a hundred deaths all told. What is true and what is false only one man knows, if he still lives.

The goatman? Aye, I met him once on the wastes, traveling to New Caledonia. He saved me from the sand pirates there. What happened to him after that, I can't say. He had no food and too little fuel. Normally bad odds for the windy season there. But he was no normal man--I knew it then and have heard it in the tales since. Stay a while, and listen.

Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



The White Dragon posted:

if i was a betting man, i'd err on the side of "he inherited a psycho cult way of life and then got a luck-out beverly hillbillies fortune when TLC asked to make a TV show out of him." you wouldn't call the grand wizard of the mormon church a genius or a manipulator, he ultimately inherited his followers from joseph smith. whoever actually started it was a smart motherfucker though

It's like the cult in True Detective. Jim Bob is that fat dead preacher and the kid is the methhead lawnmower man.

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Antifa Turkeesian
Aug 20, 2006



We've talked about the Christian Discipline movement, right? It seems really creepy but a lot of the discussion seems to be undersexed housewives trying to find ways of convincing their bewildered cornfed husbands that it's biblical and holy to spank them for being slow in serving up dinner.

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