Post in this thread to be apart of Something Awful: The Lost King

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whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

My character has big boobs and is kind of a bitch but her quest reward is good

# ¿ Jul 10, 2015 04:10

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 05:38

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

The Protagonist posted:

I'm an ideas man.

I'd take a GBS quest where you retrieve the holy chopsticks for me from the dire autismal weeaboo only for me to break them upon receipt and award the pc with the Fork of Western Imperialist Efficiency.

this is really good

# ¿ Jul 10, 2015 04:12

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

Im Cherry Hotbox, quest giver (w big boobs)

Bring me one A PRINTER.

On turn in, npc Cherry's boyfriend arrives and asks if she's ready to go out. She thanks you for the A PRINTER as both npcs leave.

Rewards: none

# ¿ Jul 10, 2015 08:56

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

Also the A PRINTER must be equipped in ur weapon slot or ur character cant move (u must carry it back from where u found it)

# ¿ Jul 10, 2015 09:08

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

# ¿ Jul 10, 2015 21:16

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

gnarlyhotep posted:

Make an NPC called The Jas Tiger who always complains about the southern part of the kingdom.

niiiice

# ¿ Jul 10, 2015 21:35

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

a starwar betamax posted:

How big are her are.....boobs... And does she give you a kiss on the cheek

its an honor just to be entrusted w shitposts tbh

# ¿ Jul 14, 2015 05:41

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

tcc world should be massive cracky slum w its most famous posters npcs that run around madly so u have to snag at the right time to get an appropriately incomprehensible quest from them

there should be no sunlight

# ¿ Jul 14, 2015 08:12

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

whoflungpoop posted:

tcc world should be massive cracky slum w its most famous posters npcs that run around madly so u have to snag at the right time to get an appropriately incomprehensible quest from them

there should be no sunlight

also a car with licenseplate THTDMJEW, 1 male npc slumped in the front seat

with [BBQ MITT] equipped: offer quest to investigate car

without [BBQ MITT] equipped: character knocked back one space, play sizzle sound, dialogue says cardoor handle too hot to touch

# ¿ Jul 15, 2015 00:56

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

Drum posted:

I edited a Spanish Manlove sprite for you.

He can have whiny adventures.

loll

# ¿ Jul 15, 2015 07:43

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

Drum posted:

A few map/inventory items.

Cheetos: standard-issue goon food
Dog Food: good eatin' if you're desperate enough.
Beer: beer.
Nintendo Gamecube: Use as toilet/bong/sexhole, then blow it up with thermite.
Cumvase: jesus loving christ
Doobie Dog: do not eat under any circumstances. (Weapon)

nice touch w the kraft singles

Windows 98 posted:

drat you Lowtax. Now I need a new name for the game

by release hell have disappeared many times, possibly twice in the same day

whoflungpoop fucked around with this message at 07:35 on Jul 16, 2015

# ¿ Jul 16, 2015 07:32

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

Windows 98 posted:

I get the gist of the A PRINTER joke but can someone give me some usernames or something more specific. Can't find anything in SAclopedia. I'd like to start doing that quest soon and want it till be well done and not some cheap poo poo I gathered from second hand information. Even though I vaguely remember the story

Borky posted:

A loose female acquaintance of mine calls me at 1:00am today and asks me if I could print something on the computer for her and bring it over in the afternoon. "Hey yeah sure sure, whatever you need I'll help you, I'm all yours," I tell her. She sends me this file and lo and behold I can't open it. It's made in Microsoft Publisher and I don't have that program so I begin panicing, trying to find this program or a way to print the file. Scouring the internet yields no results and I do my usual pacing in my room.

I finally come up with an idea and I tell the girl, if I can proceed with it. The plan was I would carry my printer about 2miles to her house, print out the needed pages, maybe talk to her a bit while I was there. I was hoping for at least a hug out of this ordeal.

By the time I get there, I'm wet all over from sweating in the +90 degree heat outside and carrying a heavy motherfucking HP Deskjet printer. The first thing I see upon entering her room (my first time in a girl's bedroom) are some panties on her bed.

After the initial shock of seeing such a horrific sight for the first time, I setup the printer and get my job done. However, I did consider sniffing the lingere when she left the room once, but with the wuss that I am, I just ended up staring at them the whole while. That was a sarcastic joke for those of you too stupid to realize that

To make a long story short, just as I was finishing up with the printing job (which was hefty), her boyfriend and his gay friend walk in, say hello, and begin hanging out in the room as they waited for the girl to finish this work so they could go to the mall.

This effectively ruins my chances of getting a hug and I walk another 2 miles home with the motherfucking printer in hand. The only thing that I got out of this were some very painful fingers and a "thanks" as I walked out her bedroom door.

So, am I pathetic for doing all these things? It wouldn't be the first time I've pledged my heart and soul to a girl and gotten back almost nothing in return. I would hate turning her or anyone else I knew down or making up some lie.