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loving pub quizzes and smartphones. Came 10th of 11 teams last night despite getting 8 or 9 out of 10 in most rounds. As soon as the picture round was handed out before the quiz proper, every loving team but us was on their iPhone frantically tapping away. There was one face who I knew which TV show she was a co-presenter on and the name wasn't coming, but had deliberately put my WIFI-ENABLED-iDEVICE away in my bag so as to stay true to the spirit of the game. If it doesn't come from your noggin then what is the goddamn point? Any fucker can look something up (well maybe not the team that came 11th!). Not keeping to the honour system is not very British at all. Cunts, the lot of them. Also there seems to be a correlation between how blatantly you cheat and having a hipster beard and lumberjack shirt. Cheers for ruining what used to be a fun little social distraction, you wankers. I have no problem with being trounced as long as it's fair and square. If any of the Toon goons would like to join our team, we should all bring every computing device we own, set up camp, and not even pretend that we're not blatantly looking everything up. Equal share of the prizes and I'll buy the first round. Also  at making a shopping list being too much  crispix here's a dirt-simple Saag Paneer. As mentioned earlier, the spinach is probably the costliest item (but is on offer in Tesco at the moment!). That makes four portions and reheats well, so two quid of the spinach needed won't hurt too much. If you're feeling fancy you can make your own paneer - it's easy! Bonus: you don't even have to set foot in a scary ethnic trolley-world to get the ingredients! Cheek aside, this is tasty stuff.
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Aug 21, 2015 10:15
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Bozza posted:Cheating on the pub quiz is the lowest of the low. As a Party Boat posted:Speaking as a checked-shirt wearing beardy man: gently caress hipsters. No offense intended. I'm sure you know which exact kind of shirt I mean and doubt you are sporting the same kind. More importantly, is your mate's mam fit?
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Aug 21, 2015 10:49
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As for team names, I think the most potentially offensive we came up with was during the height of ARE MADDIE mania. We were consistently coming third for weeks and third gets a big bag of assorted sweeties. "[our regular team name] gives the sweets to Maddie." Although this week's "[regular team name]: Straight Outta Bensham" was quite pleasing too.
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Aug 21, 2015 10:55
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lorn Wayne posted:to the guy asking for veggie food advice (even though i basically eat anything with a pulse): Yeah this (no idea what your mum's recipe is but this is idiot-proof, delicious and cheap as gently caress too). Bobby Deluxe posted:i guess you would have a natural advantage with the residents of the monkey arms having to use crayons You're mistakenly thinking of Hartlepool. I can barely remember why "[team name] says burn the Kerrang" happened one week, but it got a number of disapproving stares. We so edgy!
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Aug 21, 2015 11:30
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Eeh yon capcha is coosty barry, mahagger barakoosh. Diven be a radge gadgie and claip on that manashee or I’ll be fuckin’ ladged ya rootle. Let’s spend proper lowie (20 bar and 50 wing) on gum and get peeved then see if ya can get yer bull, goozle CH! Then we’ll gan for a screev down the Mad Mile. I’m gonna put on my new plafs to feast yer yeks on. Born and bred in Berwick. That's just the tip of the iceberg. You can't win this.
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Sep 30, 2015 11:21
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Party Boat posted:loving hell, I understood maybe half of that. It's puah sharn man. Haha! It does get a bit dense from the Romany origins of a lot of it mixed in with the Scots and NE stuff. Translation for those not cursed with growing up there: "Well I do declare, your girlfriend over there is great/amazing/gorgeous/beautiful, my friend [barakoosh for emphasis - I don't think anyone ever knows what it really means]. Don't be a crazy man and grass on that woman [reasons unexplained in my poor narrative as to what she's guilty of] or I'll be really embarrassed, you idiot. Let's spend some serious money (£20 and 50p) on alcohol and get drunk then see if you can gently caress her, [goozle is sort of a friendly "mate" thing suggesting they're a bit mental - CH is just another emphasis that Berwickers will add to the end of any sentence like a full stop]. Then we'll go for a very fast drive down a particularly treacherous stretch of the Berwick bypass where many have died doing the same. I'm going to put on my new shoes for you to look upon favourably with your eyes." Can't believe I didn't slip a shan/sharn in there! That was shan of me 
franco fucked around with this message at 11:46 on Sep 30, 2015 |
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Sep 30, 2015 11:42
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learnincurve posted:I counter what Franco said with everything my North Yorkshire farmer grandfather said for the last 20 years of his life. Well what can I say? Yorkshireman born and bred, strong in't arm, weak in't 'ed. I'll come round ya keer and bray yee, ye lood CH. I shall arrive at your place of residence and engage in victorious fisticuffs with you, you numbskull ! That girlfriend is capcha (capture) in Berwickese still cracks me up. Literally a "dragged back to cave by hair" sentiment!
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Sep 30, 2015 12:35
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The Big Taff Man posted:Cyanide I hope I'll take "Things that the Welsh are also terrible at." for $300, Alex
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Sep 30, 2015 12:56
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Dugong posted:Holy gently caress the British Gas helpline has one song; a terrible cover of Clocks. Which is particularly cruel because you can't even successfully stick your head in the oven until they fix the issue.
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Sep 30, 2015 20:09
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Ratjaculation posted:whats everyone up to tonight? I'm going to work at a Popular Entertainment Destination™ in a few minutes until 7am on a rugby weekend so gently caress you all with your steaks, brie, good beer and sleep 
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Oct 10, 2015 22:06
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Lipman's renowned for being a total horror (well, as well as being cripplingly unfunny), so I can't say I'm at all surprised.Bobby Deluxe posted:like just cute small or scary small Not as cute as this man's, apparently. Dat first sentence. Wiki vandalism (even complimentary) appears to fly under the radar if you're a UK d-lister.
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Oct 23, 2015 13:05
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None of sausageman's wares at Newcastle Christmas/Continental market yesterday. Got soaked for nothing. Pedricko's dethroning from King of the Thread further justified. Too much Sicani in Carluccio's took the edge off somewhat 
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Nov 18, 2015 09:25
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Pedricko posted:We're only doing Manchester, Chester, Lincoln and Belfast this year. As far as I know. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xZu-gOeBF8s
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Nov 18, 2015 10:50
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learnincurve posted:Jo Whiley Pasty indie witch. I wish I could remember who said that so many years ago. It's too perfect.
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Nov 24, 2015 10:35
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Party Boat posted:I got some sossiges and Christmas pate off an old man running Pedricko's stall Hold on a sec...you mean in The Toon? Or are you on your travels? 
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Dec 15, 2015 12:42
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Ah bugger. No saus/pâté for me then
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Dec 15, 2015 13:02
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Just got back from a star war. How does a major UK cinema chain in a major shopping centre not have any salted popcorn available for such a showing? Did they forget it was on? Broken Britain 
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Dec 18, 2015 01:10
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Oh it's absolutely a rip (their Star Wars "combo" was £12.95 for a large drink and popcorn in branded containers lol). But seeing as I only go to the cinema about once every year or so these days I JUST WANTED SOME MOVIE POPCORN DAMMIT. Also I hate to take this moment to break this to you/party boat/other locals but Kathy Secker died. Goodnight sweet princess of local TV.
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Dec 18, 2015 01:19
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Gaz2k21 posted:New Year's Eve is a poo poo night to go out, just buy a bottle of whiskey and watch the hootenanny. I think every day's a Hootenanny. I've got a rare year where I'm not working through midnight but get the pleasure of starting at 7am on the 1st. It's going to be a cornucopia of the sloppiest dregs a casino has to offer by then 
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Dec 30, 2015 08:59
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Jose posted:are you the oldest poster itt I'm already 40 so probably not  Happy New Year! Virgin Media is celebrating by having my TV/Broadband/Phone die again. Helpline says their engineer is working on it RIGHT NOW. Yeah. Right. Work in a couple of hours to see how many casino patrons are still coherent/vertical by now. Hopefully they stopped the booze at some point recently...
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Jan 1, 2016 05:54
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Bozza posted:Random but anyone know where you can buy them chip shop pickled chillis from? Wanna get me some cos they're nice as gently caress. http://www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=278776444
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Jan 24, 2016 17:59
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Bozza posted:Yeah but a whole jar not the measly 2 I get with a kebab Ahem.
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Jan 24, 2016 20:21
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Just put the bins out to find Gertrude blowing a poor, mewling cat down the back lane in bursts. Candles at hand and praying for my roof  Goodbye, Gateshead. How many will shed a tear if you blow away?
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Jan 29, 2016 08:32
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DOWN JACKET FETISH posted:also what the hell is carol vorderman doing as prosecutor-general of the crimea Many things are suddenly becoming clear.  Also, it's Party Boat posted:canny blawy
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Feb 2, 2016 08:39
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Looked in mirror. Am not chubby, ginger Welshman with an unhealthy obsession with props from 90's children's shows. Real, non-Taff-alt, person status confirmed 
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Feb 19, 2016 22:51
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Kluliss posted:Generally avoid the sausages though, I'm pretty sure they're made of eyelids and scrotums. As every good sausage SHOULD be (also lips and anuses) 
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Feb 29, 2016 22:00
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poo poo, do we even have a stock xenophobic thing for Venezuelans? I fear there's a gap in our bigotry. "Nice backpack...for carrying all your hyper-inflated currency in! ROFL" or maybe "lol no bread-havers"?
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Feb 29, 2016 22:31
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I suppose we do have a common bond in that both countries have had problems with Chávez IT IS SORT OF A PUN STOP JUDGING ME
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Feb 29, 2016 22:38
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Jose posted:everyone saying a greasy spoon will be cheaper and better than weatherspoons should provide some evidence because they all still use poo poo sausages and bacon and no chance they're cheaper Yeah, it was true about 15/20 years ago, but you'll be lucky now to find a greasy spoon that is either cheap, traditional, quality or not turned into a generic pizza/kebab place. Newcastle still mourns the loss of Peter's Snack Bar (now rebranded PSB 'cos that's cool and poo poo and only selling the same pizzas that every other establishment on that bit of road does). Happy days when you'd be served fantastic, belly-busting all-day breakfasts by (and cooked by) an eccentric, elderly, Polish man, affectionately known by all as Uncle Peter, in the company of every trucker/roadie/techie/biker within a 10 mile radius for a couple of quid Edit: on proper lovely Formica tables, mind you! Manic X posted:Nope you don't gots a good joke. 
franco fucked around with this message at 23:09 on Feb 29, 2016 |
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Feb 29, 2016 23:06
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I can never quite decide what's more embarrasing - white dreads or white cornrows à la Axl Rose. Beckham, you're a very handsome man, but those rows were doing you no favours at all. I am putting together a big ol' cous cous with feta, sundried tomatoes, lemon juice, olives, pine nuts, peppers and other bits and bobs. Tell me, thread, am I a big wooly woofter - there's no sausage in there at all?
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Feb 29, 2016 23:28
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Kluliss posted:There's a great greasy spoon in North Shields called The Cottage Kitchen. For under £3 I got a huge plate of eggs chips and beans, and a pot of tea. The trouble with that is you have to set foot in North Shields, a place thats best boast is "not quite as populated by mutants as South Shields".
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Mar 1, 2016 06:41
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Pedricko posted:Sausages in Newcastle this week Oh you gon get stairsed SO hard, son. At the Monument, I assume?
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May 10, 2016 06:33
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Pedricko posted:If that's where it usually is, then that's where it is. I've not done Newcastle before. What days are you there? Have stuff to do in toon tomorrow so will buy a Bobby Deluxe posted:geordie special or three if you're up and running then. Asking for it by that name is stairs-ing you without stairs-ing you - it's the perfect crime. You'll know.
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May 10, 2016 19:09
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Newcastle/Gateshead status: gloriously sunny and hot in a good way. Saussieman status: redeemed.  I was in a bit of a rush, so although you did the spiel well and seemed very pleasant, I'm blanking on a couple. From top left chorizo, hazelnut one, peppercorn one. Right-hand side small duo is venison salami I think. Then...I got nothin'. Maybe a tub of rejected Mini Eggs at the bottom? Halp. OMG I met another goony goon Taff status: still a oval office.
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May 11, 2016 12:19
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Pedricko posted:I loving knew you were a goon. I was part way through setting up (let's close the A1!) so I wasn't really vibing on the pitch Jesus, am I that transparent? I deliberately didn't do any "stairs/geordie special" bullshit so as not to make things awkward and you still knew. Am so depressed right now. I'm not even overweight and don't wear jorts. Thanks for the clarification though  This is all assuming that it IS me you identified of course. Exact purchase and rough physical/attire description will suffice.
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May 11, 2016 12:47
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Pedricko posted:Tallish thinnish guy with a hat who bought three mixes and exudes social awkwardness? Not a fan of repeat business, I see Not sure where you're getting the sperglord part from a "can I have saus please?" "yes you can" "here's the money" "thanks, bye" "cheers, bye" type interaction, but tallish thinnish 3-bagger with a hat would be me, aye. Not a fedora, for the record. How have you found the toon so far?The Big Taff Man posted:I cant believe goons are so afraid to just say "Alright mate, wheres the goon discount". Nah, no fear, just find I AM A GOON, GOON SIRE a bit dorky in public 
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May 11, 2016 19:13
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Apparently I typed something funny. Get in! e: did you think that was an actual transcript of the conversation?
franco fucked around with this message at 21:08 on May 11, 2016 |
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May 11, 2016 21:05
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Ah yes look at me rolling with the punches. I'm very sorry dead gay forums poster and also literal goon, corn in the fridge.
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May 11, 2016 21:14
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It's all good in the hood. Slightly grumpy because the Magpies are almost definitely relegated now. Strangely proud of being the least dorky goon that a sausage slinger has ever met. If you're loving off to Scandi again, Pedricko then I'm glad I stocked up. hello
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May 11, 2016 21:26
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freelop posted:The BBC is shutting down their recipe website which sucks. Looks like an online petition sort of worked for once. And if they're not true to their word of moving all the content over to the Good Food site, some clever chap made a scraper for the existing recipe URLs (as it seems they were initially planning on just removing the front end but not the recipes themselves - hence "mothballed", I suppose) here. At the risk of getting all RARGH BBC MY LICENCE FEE I PAID FOR THAT , it really was turning into such a dick move. You can pretty much guarantee that any recipe on there is trustworthy and will turn out correctly (even if you dislike the dish itself). Which is more than you can say for googling around and getting some kitten-crazy Midwestern momma blog's take on something you want to try.The Hairy Bikers were apparently really upset by the initial decision and have promised to put all of their ones that were on there up on their own site gratis. Good on them. I am mad about recipes ITT.
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May 20, 2016 19:07
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