|
Bleusman posted:Gosh guys, you gotta get more mature, because the school has a major problem with dick graffiti
|
# ¿ Jan 28, 2016 19:18 |
|
|
# ¿ Mar 19, 2024 07:17 |
|
Broenheim posted:mr. rex, you shouldnt be vandalizing the school but it was p. lol so youre cool by me, just tell ms. here that i gave you detention or something but you dont have to go ah, thank you, sir! you're a legend, sir!
|
# ¿ Jan 29, 2016 21:20 |
|
“so it’s gonna be forever or it’s gonna go down in flames” 1280 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:03 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Feb 1, 2016 04:04 |
|
curlingiron posted:In to make crabrock sad. me 2 m8
|
# ¿ Feb 6, 2016 06:07 |
|
This is a Story About an Animatronic Theodore Roosevelt Who-- Through Strange Scientific Machinations-- Became Sentient Some Time Before the Opening Sentence and Who in the Last Few Moments-- Through Violent Actions Good and Just Against Evil Men-- Made Friends With the One Person Who was Not an Complete rear end in a top hat Out in the Post-Apocalyptic Hellhole That was Once Unironically Called the Great State of Texas 1260 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:04 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Feb 8, 2016 07:40 |
|
i'm using ten words from winning week 100, btw
|
# ¿ Feb 8, 2016 07:54 |
|
crabrock posted:good crits Thranguy posted:good prompts In. 28) Fabulist Wuxia or Multicultural Spy-Fi
|
# ¿ Feb 9, 2016 16:02 |
|
Thranguy posted:104) Yearning for the Yellow Cities
|
# ¿ Feb 9, 2016 18:19 |
|
prompt: fable + wuxia The Man Who Made Noodles 1300 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:04 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Feb 15, 2016 01:49 |
|
|
# ¿ Feb 16, 2016 15:46 |
|
We're still supposed to write horror, yeah?
|
# ¿ Feb 17, 2016 01:19 |
|
99 problems I Have to Take Care of Everything 1400 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:05 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Feb 22, 2016 04:47 |
|
In
|
# ¿ Feb 23, 2016 02:14 |
|
What Knights Do 969 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:05 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Feb 28, 2016 23:31 |
|
Good crits
|
# ¿ Mar 2, 2016 07:43 |
|
In with won.
|
# ¿ Mar 4, 2016 19:19 |
|
Prompt: "Won" -- The reluctance on a person’s part to let go of an illusion Wild Bears Do Not Smoke 1200 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:05 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Mar 7, 2016 05:20 |
|
I wasn't a judge so these aren't full crits they're just When I Got Bored *Rathlord: Third sentence. Overly, unnecessarily descriptive all the way through. This is more of a set up to a bad punchline (she’s a hooker how scandalous how amazing he didn’t realize before) than a real story. *sparksbloom: First sentence, honestly. Then I push past that and I have too many names and nothing to care about. I stopped reading entirely at “You went to that bookstore again” because I don’t care about anything so why should I keep going *flerp: Man, lot of ghost stories lately. I got bored at “I hit the table hard.” Up to that point, nothing new has been brought to the table. “dad ur a ghost” “so?? lol.” Okey dokey. I skimmed over something about sticking a finger into water but I didn’t really read past where I got bored. *Killer-of-Lawyers: Woo buddy that opening paragraph is a doozy to figure out. Is Brigid also a sorcerer or is that a different character? Is Devin the sorcerer? Who is the queen? I dunno. I’m not reading anymore. *Guiness13: “So, that’s it, is it? You want him to die so you can live?” She rose to her knees and leaned over Death. “That is not going to happen!” I don’t know why this girl is important enough for capital D Death to talk to her nor do I know why Death is such a… what’s the word? “Little bitch?” Maybe. You opened strong. *Ironic Twist: Read the whole thing. *newtestleper: “He’d told me before that glacial runoff sinks.” I have no idea what the gently caress I’m supposed to be reading here. *hotsoupdinner: “I stare at it for twelve minutes before one time I blink and then it’s gone” is a weird sentence and feels like a tense shift in your story (even though it’s technically not). “The me that lived here rises and takes control of my body” is where you lost me. I read your whole story though. I liked the idea. Disliked implementation. *Grizzled Patriarch: Read the whole thing. *crabrock: Read the whole thing. *Bird Tyrant: “I am alone, harsh wind blowing away my cries for help, so that no noise comes out at all.” I’m getting sleepy. *Carl Killer Miller: “In spring, they'd had (fraternal) twin assemblies. The boys watched their gym coach yell about just how much their things had changed and would change…” Easy enough to read but nothing is happening. Describe less scenery. Include more doing. *ghost crow: I read the whole thing. But I like futuristic sci fi stuff so don’t sprain your wrist patting yourself on the back. Did you try and throw in as many asiany metaphors as possible? Also, major Ghost in the Shell vibes at the end. Not in a good way. Is this secretly fanfiction?
|
# ¿ Mar 8, 2016 07:07 |
|
In.
|
# ¿ Mar 12, 2016 03:45 |
|
Listening to: Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You) 1283 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:06 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Mar 14, 2016 06:35 |
|
In.
|
# ¿ Mar 15, 2016 04:18 |
|
anime was right posted:your knight must slice off a finger or toe for every loved one they fail. Mauka no Makai 1294 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:06 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Mar 21, 2016 05:37 |
|
I like this guy. Stay angry forever, y'all. In.
|
# ¿ Mar 25, 2016 13:24 |
|
Everything Comes from the Ocean; Three Stories of Expression 1500 words Oh! 500 words --see archive-- Mutiny 500 words --see archive-- Your Heart Will Tell You What Your Head Doesn't Want To Believe 500 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:09 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Mar 28, 2016 04:21 |
|
How Can Adverbs Be Real If Our Eyes Aren't Real?
|
# ¿ Mar 30, 2016 14:07 |
|
In.
|
# ¿ Apr 2, 2016 02:03 |
|
Three Letter Words 500 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:11 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Apr 4, 2016 04:32 |
|
In. Hit me with a song.
|
# ¿ Apr 5, 2016 17:33 |
|
Country Feedback The Cicada, Grief 1111 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:11 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Apr 11, 2016 04:38 |
|
I wasn't a judge so these aren't real crits. They're just When I got bored: If That’s What It Takes Opening paragraph. Pre-dawn “Another woman elbowed him in the ribs.” Seemed like it might have been a cool setting but idk Foreign Flower Cool. Read the whole thing. Ain’t No Girl Like Me Also cool. Read the whole thing. The Beat That’s in Every Blast Read the whole thing because the setting was interesting and I kept expecting it to get better but it didn’t. Ash Knowledge “Doting grandfathers can.” Why tell a story within in a story in a short story competition? I don’t know. It could be done well, I guess. It wasn’t here. Men Over Mission Read the whole thing. Nice setting. Miracle “Walled city.” Lots of ash. Got it. Spooky. it wasn't spooky The Free Radical “Never had Dominic felt so useless.” It all started to blur here and I didn’t care so I stopped reading. Mother in the Radio “Phil listens to him because it’s his son.” Present tense felt wrong and I didn’t like it Titanomachy “To want to, but not be able to.” The casual flippance of the overly brutal childhood did little for my pallet. Nice opening though. Arc I got to Rebirth before I was like “wtf am I reading here?” No idea. Messiah en Route Cool voice. Cool visuals with the traffic. Read the whole thing. The Cicada, Grief Wow. Fun read. Got through it all. Great job, whoever you are. I can totally see all the nuances you put into this. Sightless Eyes “Its newfound existence.” I realized that sentence was never gonna end and I was gonna have to start back from the beginning to figure out what was going on and I didn’t want to. but not me in Read the whole thing. This didn’t do it for me. The composition felt… clumsy? I was left with a “what the gently caress” but not the kind you were going for. Temptations Read the whole thing
|
# ¿ Apr 12, 2016 00:46 |
|
sebmojo posted:come on you dam dirty apes do you want to live forever In.
|
# ¿ Apr 12, 2016 01:15 |
|
Harper and the Rails 2593 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:11 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Apr 18, 2016 07:36 |
|
In with Russia.
|
# ¿ Apr 22, 2016 06:24 |
|
Medusa or the Lotus Eaters 1069 words Prompt: Russia --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:12 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ Apr 25, 2016 04:28 |
|
Ironic Twist posted:Yes, I will assign a video for you if you ask Asking
|
# ¿ May 3, 2016 08:03 |
|
Twenty-Seven Isn’t Much and a Coat’s Even Less 1500 words https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-3QByz1S9U --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:12 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ May 9, 2016 04:39 |
|
In with whatever you'd like me to write about.
|
# ¿ May 11, 2016 16:11 |
|
Those are good crits. Thank you for the time you spent writing them.
|
# ¿ May 12, 2016 16:11 |
|
Thranguy posted:London, 1593 Black Bile, Yellow Bile, Phlegm, and Blood 1856 words --see archive-- Tyrannosaurus fucked around with this message at 16:12 on Jan 2, 2017 |
# ¿ May 16, 2016 06:56 |
|
|
# ¿ Mar 19, 2024 07:17 |
|
Poll: simple prompt or complicated prompt? Your vote counts.
|
# ¿ May 16, 2016 18:59 |