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I probably should have posted this a while ago, but the gravity didn't quite hit me until now. My best friend from high school (now a teacher) has become the advisor of the Gay-Straight Alliance at my former high school, where she now teaches. A while back, she asked me if I could come in and talk to the kids as a sort of guest speaker, as I had been out of the closet in high school and things are apparently very different there now- also, apparently they're interested in some sort of adult perspective on being gay in the world and what it's like and so on. It's not that I don't have anything to talk about- I ran into some nasty stuff in school that I overcame, and I have a unique perspective on being both in and out of the closet (I work for a Catholic organization, so I lie to my coworkers daily) but I'm not really an engaging speaker or anything and frankly, I'm scared shitless. What do kids these days need to know? What would even interest them about my life? I'm a lurking goon, for God's sake. I feel like I have a lot of responsibility here and I have no idea what to do with it. So if you had this chance- what would you tell these kids? What questions would you ask? This is a Gay-Straight Alliance in the most redneck of towns, where the KKK had a town hall meeting the next town over maybe five years ago. Kids drive their tractors to school and I met maybe two black kids until I went to college. We were featured on an episode of Hoarders. Gimme all you got.
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Jan 12, 2016 17:41
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 05:38 |
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I have zero content advice, but a note on public speaking: speakers can certainly be charismatic and engaging, but the vast majority of us aren't. There are those rare people out there who could give a talk on the history of writing history and make it something everyone would want to hear, but they are far and few between. Content, on the other hand, can also be engaging and even an average speaker who has exciting material that they know well can really hold an audience. You're at a major advantage here since chances are that the kids who are part of the Gay-Straight Alliance are already going to be very interested in what it's like being gay in high school and how to cope with it. The other big tip I can give is to go in there confident. Even if you are absolutely not, just bullshit it. You always sound more awkward when you are listening to yourself than you do to an outside observer. Just dive on in and start talking about what your'e there to talk about. In your situation I would probably sit down and think about what you would have wanted to know yourself back then, as thats' a situation you were in. What kind of things were you concerned with? What kind of things did you need some help or guidance with? Try to figure out a central theme, and build a basic presentation around that. The most basic 5-paragraphy essay style works OK here: a central theme, a handful of supporting arguments, and anecdotes and evidence to support it all sprinkled throughout. Given the topic and the crowd I would also break off a big part for questions and some kind of discussion. Again, this is where the audience is a huge benefit to you. You aren't lecturing a room full of disinterested students who would rather be somewhere else - these are people who chose to be there because they are interested in what you are talking about, so they will probably have their own questions for you.
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Jan 12, 2016 20:50
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I think a good idea to note or emphasize would be that sexual identity can be a fluid thing. Kids at the high school age are just starting to figure out their sexuality, and quite a lot of people bounce back and forth between "straight" or "gay" or "queer" or the like as things to call themselves for years on end. It's okay to not be sure of your sexuality, and to not conform to some idea of "being straight" or "being gay." There are just as many stereotypes of masculinity and femininity within the LGBTQ community as there are outside of it, and they're just as bullshit. Given your description of the area, it may also be worth noting that there's nothing wrong with being queer *and* being religious. A lot of people on both ends think it's incompatible, but there are a number of Christian denominations that recognize and will perform gay marriages (Presbyterians, Episcopalians, and the Evangelical Lutheran Church of America - there are other Lutheran sects that don't - are three of the more common), and even if there are none in that area there are probably resources they can find about how it's okay to be both queer and a Christian. I can't speak for other religions, though, as my experience is strictly with Christianity.
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Jan 13, 2016 01:10
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Cyrano4747 posted:Given the topic and the crowd I would also break off a big part for questions and some kind of discussion. Again, this is where the audience is a huge benefit to you. You aren't lecturing a room full of disinterested students who would rather be somewhere else - these are people who chose to be there because they are interested in what you are talking about, so they will probably have their own questions for you. Yeah, unless they've explicitly told you otherwise I would plan to do like a 10-15 minute talk and just open it for questions and discussion with the students. For your talk, try to tell some specific stories from your experience rather than just talking about what it was like in general (don't use real names obviously). I would also suggest you save a few small stories and write down some questions so you have some conversation starters.
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Jan 13, 2016 03:19
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I don't have advice on the topic specifically, but you are in the closet at work and yet you're going to speak openly at a high school about being gay? I would be very, very careful about that unless you're talking about a school far away from where you currently live. Best of luck, and don't worry about being a great speaker - just open the floor to questions and be honest with the kids.
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Jan 15, 2016 23:25
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I think Dan Savage's advice of "It gets better" is a pretty good piece of advice to give. Gay kids often have difficulty in school which leads to difficulty in other areas, too, since school is such a huge part of their life at that point. It seems like such a minor thing but there are lots of testimonials about how being told "It's okay" and "You won't always feel this way" at a formative age made a huge difference in a lot of people's lives.
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Jan 16, 2016 12:02
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Ddraig posted:I think Dan Savage's advice of "It gets better" is a pretty good piece of advice to give. This is good advice for everyone in primary education.
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Jan 17, 2016 12:01
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Teach them about the local tea room trade. It's a dying institution but I feel it still has legs where you are. We need live practitioners for when the cycle flips and it becomes trendy again.
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Jan 19, 2016 07:51
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 05:38 |
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So, trip report?
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Jan 19, 2016 14:19
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