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SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀



He's a big bear!



He's known as Bear 122 but his nickname is The Boss.



He's famous for eating a black bear. That was before he got his ear tag.



Sometimes he sleeps. Awww.



He's a mighty fine bear and we're proud he calls :canada: home.

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buddhanc
Feb 16, 2010

That's a fine looking bear. I remember the first time I saw a grizzly. You can't imagine how giant they are in your head prior to your first encounter. It was pretty drat frightening initially

Levitate
Sep 30, 2005

randy newman voice

YOU'VE GOT A LAFRENIÈRE IN ME
Canada's super bear soldier breeding program is out of control

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

I think it's about right, we don't need you coming up here and stealing our water

or our weed

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/bears-guarded-b-c-grow-op-rcmp-1.960964

Epitope
Nov 27, 2006

Grimey Drawer
I recently learned some of them kill like 30 calves in a spring. I had thought "oh dont worry they eat roots and poo poo too," but no they're basically chubby lions

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

Epitope posted:

I recently learned some of them kill like 30 calves in a spring. I had thought "oh dont worry they eat roots and poo poo too," but no they're basically chubby lions

Pretty sure a grizzly would kick the poo poo out of a lion. Not that it matters because I'd be running away.

I think a you tube channel addressed this question.

Rysithusiku
Nov 10, 2013

Witness the assless man and despair!
All futures point to a world of filled holes.
I vaguely recall in the late 1800s there was an actual cage match between a lion and a grizzly. And the grizzly broke the lion's neck on the first swipe :ohdear:

edit: I had it backwards!

quote:

There are only two species of bear in the Park, the black and the grizzly. Of these the black bear is the less timid. At least we never encountered a grizzly upon the road.—to our entire satisfaction,—while we saw many black bears. We did see grizzlies, though, at the "Bear • Feeding Grounds" which are maintained near the big hotel and tourist camp near Old Faithful, and they are an impressive looking beast. While the black bear rarely attains a weight ofmore than 400 pounds, the grizzly when full grown generally weighs around 1.000 pounds. And his strength is in proportion to his size. A few years ago an Englishman who had hunted lions In Africa ventured, upon a visit here, to express the opinion that an African lion could whip a grizzly in fair fight. His' opinion was so warmly disputed by partisans of the grizzly that he determined to settle the matter. He brought a full grown lion to this Park and it was put into a cage'along with a grizzly. The lion at once sprang to the attack leaping upon the bear's' back and trying to dig in with claws and teeth. The grizzly sincerely shook him off. The lion again sprang and was again shaken off. A third time it was shaken off, but this time the lion, annoyed, gave it a swipe with one of its paws, and broke its back. killing it with a single blow.

Rysithusiku fucked around with this message at 08:37 on Mar 15, 2016

Levitate
Sep 30, 2005

randy newman voice

YOU'VE GOT A LAFRENIÈRE IN ME
well that was poorly written

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

What do you mean, I sincerely shake off predators all the time.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:
I have trouble seeing how a lion could get the right angle to smash a grizzly back unless it was lying on the ground. Go cats I guess.

Epitope
Nov 27, 2006

Grimey Drawer

Rysithusiku posted:

I vaguely recall in the late 1800s there was an actual cage match between a lion and a grizzly. And the grizzly broke the lion's neck on the first swipe :ohdear:

edit: I had it backwards!

See that's along the lines of my original conception. Lion's all "must kill thing!" and bear's just "whatever man, why you up in my poo poo" But the research found some bears are chill, and some are bloodthirsty killers :ohdear:

I LIKE COOKIE
Dec 12, 2010

I think that's a typo and they meant to say grizzley

Lol at a lion swiping at a grizzley and breaking it back. Yeah right. That bear hosed that lion up

pantslesswithwolves
Oct 28, 2008

Ba-dam ba-DUMMMMMM

I've never seen a bear in the wild personally, but a few years ago, I was camping by myself in a completely deserted campground in central PA in mid-October in anticipation of going mountain biking the next day. I was sitting at my site, drinking whiskey and enjoying the crackle and pop of my fire, when I heard something large crunching through the bush within 200' of me. There was suddenly a meaty THUD sound, an annoyed half-growl/yelp, then the sound of something large crunching through the brush in the opposite direction. Best I figure, a black bear walked head-first into a tree and ran off.

I love bears. I think they're fascinating animals and would love to see one, preferably one far away, unaware of my presence and heading in the opposite direction.

meselfs
Sep 26, 2015

The body may die, but the soul is always rotten
Awesome bear indeed! And... fearsome looking; my three year old daughter loves everything ursus (I've tricked her into believing they only eat berries and honey. Not far from truth in our parts actually), but she was actually a bit taken back by these pictures.

More awesome Canadian bears randomly caught on webcam:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AihvuZiDhsg

Bears in Oregon are pussies. I've seen a few, they just run away. There's actually no recorded case of a bear ever killing a human around here.

quote:

There was suddenly a meaty THUD sound, an annoyed half-growl/yelp, then the sound of something large crunching through the brush in the opposite direction. Best I figure, a black bear walked head-first into a tree and ran off.

The black bear's clumsiness is not exaggerated; they say you can outrun a bear if it's steep downhill, they often lose footing and start tumbling. I've heard of bears accidentally crashing through the woods into humans, and running off terrified.

But, if they attack, they mean it, unlike others which might stop after you die, play dead, or go limp. Black bears will eat you if they decide to get close.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:
I remember a story about a guy beating a black beat to death with a log. That seems like a best case scenario.

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

My face to face encounter with a black bear ended with me yelling at it to get back, and it did.

meselfs posted:

More awesome Canadian bears randomly caught on webcam:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AihvuZiDhsg


I wish there was a way I could access all the remote camera data here because then I could find some neat photos of me. I've noticed quite a few cameras in quite a few different places, and there's definitely going to be a lot more that I happened to walk past.

Epitope
Nov 27, 2006

Grimey Drawer
TFW you realize your secluded pee spot is actually broadcast to Wayne Kubat's next hunting vid.

Levitate
Sep 30, 2005

randy newman voice

YOU'VE GOT A LAFRENIÈRE IN ME

Picnic Princess posted:

My face to face encounter with a black bear ended with me yelling at it to get back, and it did.


I wish there was a way I could access all the remote camera data here because then I could find some neat photos of me. I've noticed quite a few cameras in quite a few different places, and there's definitely going to be a lot more that I happened to walk past.

That's kind of creepy really

"i'm out away from everything enjoying solitude oh look there's a camera"

meselfs
Sep 26, 2015

The body may die, but the soul is always rotten

Picnic Princess posted:

I wish there was a way I could access all the remote camera data here because then I could find some neat photos of me. I've noticed quite a few cameras in quite a few different places, and there's definitely going to be a lot more that I happened to walk past.

Hah, well... if they upload their images in realtime (most don't I would guess), you can pretty easily setup a computer at home to snag the images off the internet, go pose, and come home to find your portrait. Did this last year going to the beach with the fam, it was fun :).

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:
How many hunting cameras have footage of hikers jerking it in the woods? You could be famous and not know it.

Epitope
Nov 27, 2006

Grimey Drawer

Outrail posted:

How many hunting cameras have footage of hikers jerking it in the woods? You could be famous and not know it.

Oh shi-

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

the best thing you could do is own your fame

no one can bully you if you respond with "Yea, so what?"

black children
Dec 14, 2009
good bear OP. most bears are pussies but looks like you found a winner. that's loving badass that he ate another bear

black children fucked around with this message at 10:32 on Apr 11, 2016

black children
Dec 14, 2009

buddhanc posted:

That's a fine looking bear. I remember the first time I saw a grizzly. You can't imagine how giant they are in your head prior to your first encounter. It was pretty drat frightening initially

my crew in alaska had the all-time record for hazard bears destroyed, the foreman used to carry a shotgun for this express purpose. they're kinda frightening at first but once you see them go down with a few slugs in them you lose the fear and it's replaced with just a healthy respect. i think i could probably kill a bear with an axe, they're not that tough. they're basically huge dogs

Crazyeyes
Nov 5, 2009

If I were human, I believe my response would be: 'go to hell'.
Saw a bear when hiking in New Mexico. It was big and cool. Just kinda stood there staring at us as we walked.

black children
Dec 14, 2009

Crazyeyes posted:

Saw a bear when hiking in New Mexico. It was big and cool. Just kinda stood there staring at us as we walked.

that's bears for ya. nature's betas

barkbell
Apr 14, 2006

woof
i bang a pot and ladle to scare a bear up a tree.

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

I scolded a black bear once and it went away. But grizzlies like 122 deserve respect.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

black children posted:

my crew in alaska had the all-time record for hazard bears destroyed, the foreman used to carry a shotgun for this express purpose. they're kinda frightening at first but once you see them go down with a few slugs in them you lose the fear and it's replaced with just a healthy respect. i think i could probably kill a bear with an axe, they're not that tough. they're basically huge dogs

You're either an Internet tough guy or serious, either way that'd be great to watch.

Average Bear
Apr 4, 2010
Cool bear.

glowing-fish
Feb 18, 2013

Keep grinding,
I hope you level up! :)

Came here for awesome bears, not average bears.

Free Market Mambo
Jul 26, 2010

by Lowtax
Lay down, let bear swallow you, burst forth like angry matryoshka. This isn't rocket science.

black children
Dec 14, 2009

Outrail posted:

You're either an Internet tough guy or serious, either way that'd be great to watch.

pantslesswithwolves
Oct 28, 2008

Ba-dam ba-DUMMMMMM

I'm bumping this thread with some A+++++ bear content because bears are awesome.

First, we have the patron saint of discerning beer enthusiast bears. For some reason, this story is popping up on social media now, even though it happened 12 years ago. I hope that this bear is now a craft beer fan.
http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/news/offbeat/2004-08-18-beer-bear_x.htm

Now we have this black bear cub doing battle with bearkind's eternal nemesis: a flag on a golf course.
https://youtu.be/kMkWuXk11Uk

Lady, this bear has had enough of your poo poo and is happy to let you know about it.
https://youtu.be/nU5cMZymSr0

This bear is good at beatin' the heat:
https://youtu.be/ElFAEazE3Y8

UPDATE: Bear is still good at beatin' the heat even after putting on like 200 lbs
https://youtu.be/I-yqvT8vKZc

As this video was shot in Russia, I can only assume a shitton of vodka was involved
https://youtu.be/_8mZGLRY2L0

This bear thinks your tree stand is amusing
https://youtu.be/8jRTrRxamxQ

This webcam captures amazing footage of bears doing rad bear things like standing in waterfalls waiting for salmon, napping and bobbing in water on the reg. The highlights footage is great too. I frequently put this up on one of my monitors when I work from home as my own little zen space.
http://explore.org/live-cams/player/brown-bear-salmon-cam-brooks-falls

Right of way on the trail? gently caress you, I'm a bear.
https://youtu.be/9Adk14FgN7A

So come on, let's keep on posting the :tbear:ist bears u got.

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

Here's some video I shot of a mama black bear and her cutie baby a couple years ago. Sorry for my dumb comments, it was the first video I shot with my DSLR.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3BG6iab9X9w

Blitter
Mar 16, 2011

A Classic Black Bear + Canadian.

https://youtu.be/_pLsM2ijRao

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

"Dat don''t work he's lickin it"

True canuck hoser right there eh

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Guest2553
Aug 3, 2012


My bear story involves me returning home one morning after a midnight shift and seeing a black bear going through garbage bins. It was just a wee little cub so I figured I'd help him by giving him some fruit I didn't get around to eating. Well I was rummaging through my pack to get it some cops showed up honking their horn and flashing their high beams until the cub ran away. I shrugged, went home to sleep, woke up the next morning and realized how much of an idiot I can be when I'm really really tired.

FFF- would not attempt to feed bears again.

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