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Ceiling fan
Dec 26, 2003

I really like ceilings.
Dead Man’s Band
Sent a PM. It's time I got on the Postmaster General's special watchlist.

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Ceiling fan
Dec 26, 2003

I really like ceilings.
Dead Man’s Band

Nostalgia4Infinity posted:

Negative. I used a ~*~secret sauce~*~ this year to make matches.

It was a literal hat.

Was it red? That affects my gift choice.

Ceiling fan
Dec 26, 2003

I really like ceilings.
Dead Man’s Band

Soulex posted:

I also routinely forget to check my mail when smoking cigarettes.

That's for the best. I plan keeping open flames and live radios away from my mailbox for a while.

Ceiling fan
Dec 26, 2003

I really like ceilings.
Dead Man’s Band
Awesome stuff!

Anyway, my gift hasn't arrived yet. BUT. I did get something special at the office gift exchange:



CHEAP RACIST BEER

The best kind of free beer.

Not trying to set expectations or anything. Just saying. That's what was appropriate in a stuffy office setting.

Ceiling fan
Dec 26, 2003

I really like ceilings.
Dead Man’s Band
Oh, you can ship wine to an APO address. Just don't ship it in the original bottle.

Were you really in the military? Do we have another IDR situation here?

Ceiling fan
Dec 26, 2003

I really like ceilings.
Dead Man’s Band
Another lovely day listening to my coworkers whine about the budget while I explain that we are drat lucky to even be in a continuing resolution. So I don't have the funding to fire up the money printing machine I keep under my desk. Anyway, I think it broke around the beginning of November. All while listening to the news about Congress today. That they are dead set on doing the stupidest thing possible, in the stupidest way possible, while even the people who supported them are saying "Don't do that! We just wanted that loving wall. Not that!"

Oh, hey, there's something on my doorstep.



That's an interesting question, but I wanna see what's in the box.



:cry: No, no. I knew I should have worn safety goggles before opening this.

Oh, wait, look at that message. How thoughtful. This is some ninja poo poo. Let's lay this all out.



Yes, yes, everything I need for the coming apocalypse. Knowledge, tools, a disguise, and, when all else fails, a weapon that would make anyone run and hide from me.

There's a certain something about that hat. Like I should test it out, see if fits. Should I?

Ceiling fan
Dec 26, 2003

I really like ceilings.
Dead Man’s Band
It is a real Gerber pliers multitool, and I can confirm that it kicks rear end.

M.D. Creekmore's book is a real gem. He's one of the finest author's of our age. It's everything I expected, and so much more.

Ceiling fan
Dec 26, 2003

I really like ceilings.
Dead Man’s Band
Yes, but the hat. It calls to me. I look at it get a feeling of nostalgia? Pride? Dare I say, patriotism? After all, weren't we all supposed to make America great?

You know, it could be better. Like it once was, when we were younger, just starting out. The whole career ahead of us, and it could only go up. Sometimes, I miss that feeling, and want to go back, to when it was better.

And maybe I can. Maybe I'm in a position to do that. Tear it all down and put up something better.

Yes, yes. I know now. Now that I'm wearing the hat. Thank you, secret Satan! Because of you, now I too know that I can

MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

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Ceiling fan
Dec 26, 2003

I really like ceilings.
Dead Man’s Band

Soulex posted:

Awesome. I'll keep waiting!

It's just like a VA application!

Merry Chistmas!

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