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I'll try not to hog this thing and wrap my year up quickly. Also I have tread editing powers so feel free to think up some new hilarious thread names
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Dec 15, 2016 21:04
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 04:55 |
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vanisher posted:After making three of the shittiest doors you can imagine joke_explainer (the bright yellow dwarf) decides she's (plot twist) done for the day and kicks back with the bunnies (lowercase red 'r's). She gets poo poo faced on dwarven wine and is pissed she can't drink it out of a jewel encrusted goblet. As our tireless miners continue their work and learn of their friends laziness a consensus opinion forms to force her off her rear end to make some equally lovely beds so they can sleep on something other than boulders. this is eerie. i'm often irritated I can't drink out of a jewel-encrusted goblet. |
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Dec 15, 2016 21:22
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this sounds cool as he*k i'd like to be in on it |
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Dec 15, 2016 21:56
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so i guess toady never got around giving goblets and mugs an actual purpose? just chugging down that mushroom wine stright from the barrel |
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Dec 15, 2016 23:00
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Crafting is pretty low on my checklist of urgent things to get started but I'll get some mugs and goblets made. Last time I played this I don't remember dwarves getting upset over that so I'm sure we are in for a bunch of new stuff
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Dec 15, 2016 23:11
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Nosfereefer posted:so i guess toady never got around giving goblets and mugs an actual purpose? just chugging down that mushroom wine stright from the barrel he had to focus on modeling blood pressure first |
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Dec 15, 2016 23:13
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Nosfereefer posted:so i guess toady never got around giving goblets and mugs an actual purpose? just chugging down that mushroom wine stright from the barrel they use mugs now if they exist I hope we have a competent medical dwarf among us or someone is gonna have to cross-train |
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Dec 16, 2016 01:29
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MrWillsauce posted:I hope this world has some nice JOYOUS WILDS Nothing like being impaled by a squad of joyously angry unicorns |
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Dec 16, 2016 03:03
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I got so busy with that class photo thing I ran out of time tonight, but Friday night I will rampage through my year for the next person
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Dec 16, 2016 08:13
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vanisher posted:Oh I forgot to mention we are all novice comedians haha good ---------------- |
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Dec 16, 2016 18:49
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I'll happily take year 2 unless we have some other scheme in figuring out the turn order than just attempting to claim it |
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Dec 16, 2016 20:16
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joke_explainer posted:I'll happily take year 2 unless we have some other scheme in figuring out the turn order than just attempting to claim it the scheme is i will fite you for it or no, a drinking contest! beware, for my liver is 50% larger than the average human's! /dwarf yeah we can just do whatever, i'd be fine with that you can go next, or op, or somebody
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Dec 16, 2016 21:02
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i'll just commandeer the ship when noone else bothers/remembers |
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Dec 16, 2016 22:00
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Nosfereefer posted:i'll just commandeer the ship when noone else bothers/remembers Glad we are all being very BYOB about this!
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Dec 16, 2016 22:30
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im very happy you just started this stuff, i'd had waited for some lists and it would never have worked |
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Dec 16, 2016 23:27
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or just gotten extremely baked and forgotten about my idea |
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Dec 16, 2016 23:28
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Oooo yes please, been meaning to get back to df
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Dec 17, 2016 00:38
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Nosfereefer posted:im very happy you just started this stuff, i'd had waited for some lists and it would never have worked As soon as I started it I was worried I overstepped and stole your idea so I'm happy you made this post
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Dec 17, 2016 00:55
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vanisher posted:we've got that river, I like to run it into the fort with bridges all over for safety, then we have a huge pool of water that we draw wells into from within the fortress if it will stay there We totally need to build a massive hydro plant with dozens of water wheels and a power distribution system throughout the fortress. Forget the alcohol let's get started on bypass channels and coffer dams ASAP. ---------------- |
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Dec 17, 2016 02:47
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I will go last
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Dec 17, 2016 04:40
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Our hero mason joke_explainer, after recovering from her inebriation, begins working on floodgates, and then some tables for the dining area, since no wood is available. Thingyman, who has experience only in brewing fine ales and growing dank plants, and who has been chilling with the bunnies for a good long time, is tapped to pick up a spare axe and get some trees chopped down and finish up work on the Mechanics station since our other dwarves were carving what would soon become their farming cave. She (another plot twist) wasn't terribly excited about either thing, but decided to do the less labor intensive task first, and began construction of the Mechanics workshop (not even needed at this point, she was reminded by all the other dwarves multiple times). Overhead, a giant moth circled 10 levels above, peering down at The Bold Breakfast crew.   Meanwhile our mining crew are tearing it up and uncovering more exciting metals and stones  Thingyman collapses two large trees and wood stocks fill the area, instead of making beds, Joke_Explainer needs to neatly pile the wood into neat piles before she can get started on the work, which confuses and frustrates the tired miners.  After mining her (lots of ladies in this party) poor heart out, vanisher collapses onto the logpile as it's being stacked literally on top of her while she sleeps by joke_explainer
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Dec 17, 2016 04:57
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that's kinda like a bed
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Dec 17, 2016 05:00
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listen I just can't make a bed until I have the wood neatly stacked in a perfect pile *sweats nervously now that the secret that I don't know how to do carpentry is about to be revealed* |
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Dec 17, 2016 05:01
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 edit: OH SNAP I didn't even notice Thingyman found love. More details coming Joke_explainer, who was upset after being yelled at by vanisher for stacking logs all over her while sleeping, decided to not even make the beds now and went to work on tables again. Our bed hero came from Thingyman, who has found a newfound love of wood (lol).  As soon as Thingyman started making beds every single miner stopped mining and started moving wood to the stockpile  Farming operation is making progress  GOOD NEWS Our dwarves were able to set up the two sets of floodgates (impenetrable walls until properly linked to switches) without trapping themselves and needing to be mined out! HOLY H*CK  We have beds, all praise Thingyman! 
vanisher fucked around with this message at 07:22 on Dec 17, 2016
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Dec 17, 2016 05:15
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It happened quickly. All she knew is she was helping make some beds. But a casual conversation with a mining dwarf helping stack lumber for her led to something much greater. Nosfereefer: Hey... here's those stacked logs you wanted on top of vanisher Thingyman: Oh I didn't need those stacked, you're such a gentleman! Nosfereefer: Heh, 'twas a pleasure mam. Hey we sure do appreciate those beds. Thingyman: Oh these old things? I just hope they are comfy. I'm not sure how good they are, i'm just used to brewing ale back on my farm at home. Nosfereefer:  ...brewing beer at home you say? Did you leave family behind... a husband?Thingyman: No I'm not attached, my father was a miner so I've always had a thing for a dwarf who can wield a copper axe  Oh snap!  Lizard Wizard, a miller, is seen srabbling up a hillside in the distance making his way towards the Chillheads camp. Following behind him is his wife and only daughter, Mister Magpie and Food Court Bailiff. Another couple crests the hillside, it's Plebian Parasite and his wife myDad. Behind them, the third and last couple, death sext her husband big black turnout come over the hilltop. The dwarves finish linking up the floodgates for the farm area and begin digging out a cistern for water from the river. They break ground and flood the channels!  vanisher fucked around with this message at 05:36 on Dec 18, 2016
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Dec 18, 2016 04:53
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Plebian Parasite: "Hello, mason. I'm Plebian Parasite, and this is my wife, myDad." joke_explainer: "Right... right." |
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Dec 18, 2016 05:43
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Plebian Parasite, the engraver, enters the rough caves of Chillhead and shudders. A craftsdwarf runs by at lightning speed with a stack of logs. "Hey! You! Who's in charge of this place, it looks like crap." joke_explainer: "We just moved in like a month ago." PP: "Excuse me, but I will not subject my beautiful wife to such disgusting walls. We need to fix this immediately" Joke_explainer: "We didn't bring an engraver, why don't you do it." And so began the smoothing of all the walls of Chillhead by Plebian Parasite, a task that would surely take the entire rest of the year.  
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Dec 18, 2016 06:15
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Oooh, of the Hailguarded Cosmosgears? Illustrious family. Plebian married up. |
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Dec 18, 2016 06:24
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 Farming is working!! Finally, our planter Thingyman has something to do other than make beds (which our now reformed joke_explainer has embraced). Side note: joke_explainer only began working on beds when a proper carpentry workshop was set up inside Chillheads, she didn't want to work on the temporary one set up outside. This bullshit happened  We designated a food area months ago, will you dwarves please get off your asses and move the food into the room so we can safeguard it please? (Oh snap it's actually my fault for not disassembling the wagon). Poor miner MrWillsauce went out to get a drink from the river and then this bullshit happened  It's time for war my dwarves, against this evil vulture 
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Dec 18, 2016 07:11
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The dwarves look into the sky and an unseen army of vultures takes flight from a nearby tree. Maybe we need to plan this out a little bit.  Even the Giant Moth is frightened.  Quickly our axedwarves form together into an untested ragtag militia, the Defenders of Chill  MrWillhouse, the victim in the attack, finds himself filled with a rage and hatred for these winged beasts, and demands to come along for the fight. The bunnies circling the wagon flee in all directions, black wings and bright red eyes hover overhead. A guttural quacking of fright rips at the heart of anyone near enough to listen. Our team assembles. A quick swipe at a vulture causes it to fly into the air wildly! mrbradleymrmartin and nosfereefer form a front line to defend the escaping bunnies and the food stores.  The rest of the team assembles, allowing the other dwarves to rescue the bunnies, ducks, and food stores from the winged beasts  Soon, seeing the full force and might of Chillheads assembled in front of them, an impenetrable wall of mettle and steele, the vultures disperse. But not before stealing quite a bit of our food reserves.  The final vulture, the one that was swiped at by mrbradleymrmartin, screams in terror and flies away  Thank goodness our industrious miners were able to carve out the farm in time. God willing, our farm will create food for us before our meager stores run out. MrWillsauce, angered after not tasting the blood of his enemy, has gone out and attacked a creature that entered the map. A giant m.f. Rinoceros. He had no weapon, only his wrestling skills. Seeing him running at the Rino, Lizard Wizard's eyes lit up, and he decided to help. Using only his bare hands MrWillauce suplexed the Rino into the ground, shattering most of it's bones. It limps off into the woods, bleeding profusely.     Food is running short. In fact, it's constantly running out, and dwarves are hungry. An emergency hunting team is assembled, and we line up the water buffalo that we brought with us for slaughter. Just as we plan to go after the other two Rinos, a caravan enters.   Here is what the traders request next year 
vanisher fucked around with this message at 08:51 on Dec 18, 2016
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Dec 18, 2016 07:50
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there is no pleasure finer or simpler than laying a bare cheek against a smooth wall.
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Dec 18, 2016 09:26
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things are getting sexy in the ol' fortress 
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Dec 18, 2016 12:43
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also commendable job on wrestling that rhino. it never knew what hit it! [edit] 
Nosfereefer fucked around with this message at 13:01 on Dec 18, 2016 |
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Dec 18, 2016 12:45
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how does taming work atm? can we make war beast out of anything yet, or just dogs and elephants? b/c we should totes get a giant war moth [edit] this also goes for cage traps, are they still guaranteed to trap anything looking at it wrong? |
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Dec 18, 2016 12:48
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Excellent artwork there, and good questions. Right now I'm planning on trading everything not nailed down or irreplaceable for food stores (darn vultures  )Traps sound like a good plan. The esteemed Nosfereefer has decided to trade on behalf of Chillheads, let the wheeling and dealing begin! His eyes slowly scroll through the parchment paper offered by their trade partners. The dwarf has no skills in this, and his negotiation prowess is left wanting. On the list is an exquisite silver axe. A small squeak leaves Nosfereefer's lips, and he bites his finger gently. He knows the needs of the people force his hand, and he cannot squander his meager goods. Slowly the traders spiral of paper reaches the stored food section. It's some pretty grizzly stuff including chopped badger liver, prepared giant cave spider heart, prepared wolverine spleen, prepared cave crocodile intestines, and artichoke hearts. He checks off some of the meat stores and all of the plump helmet on the sheet and shows the traders what he has. The dwarven traders eyes turn into saucers as he reveals, from a small pouch at his side, a chunk of native silver. Traders: "H.. How much of this have you in your stores." N: "We have several dozen chunks we could part with, but would like to keep some for our own." Traders: "We will trade you your list for all the silver you have amassed, or we can negotiate it down if you prefer less food" He knows how much the other mining dwarves have found meaning in this hillside by unearthing these few pretty things, but for the good of all, he parts with the silver nuggets. Traders: "You are a wise people. Are you a noble or warrior in this camp." N: "We have no nobles, I lead a small band of miners." Traders: "Then I name you Sir Nosfereefer, you shall be the first noble, and commander of Chillheads!"  N: "My first decree, a golden road for our Traders to travel on! Line it with statues, and decorated walls to fend off foul beasts!" This sounds like a huge public works project, and we don't even have farming that well developed at this point, but you know how nobles are. 
vanisher fucked around with this message at 06:39 on Dec 19, 2016
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Dec 18, 2016 17:46
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Two stragglers come over the hilltop (two new migrants), they largely keep to themselves and do not have names at this point. The beautiful and alluring myDad sits at the crafting station at Lizard Wizards request, and she makes the most beautiful crossbow bolts for him to hunt Rinos with. 
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Dec 18, 2016 21:15
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  if that's not love at first sight, i don't know what is |
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Dec 18, 2016 23:36
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Winter is upon us. The hot biome is keeping things relatively unfrozen, for now. Lizard Wizard, owner of a crossbow, has decided he finds a passion in hurting innocent creatures, and has decided to try his hand at hunting. He grabs some bolts made my myDad and heads out onto the plain. Three Giant Rhinoceroses graze lazily... Meanwhile the dwarves are working to secure a path to Chillheads and build a wall to protect travelers.  In Chillheads, the farming is working out pretty well, and we have a stable food source from our farm. A decision was made to create a reservoir for a well that will link up with the dining hall, and digging was ordered. Still, to create the well we will need a chain, blocks, and a bucket, and we will need ore to create the metal for the chain. A deep underground mining effort was laid out to uncover new sources of ore, although the materials may not be available this year to finish the well.  Lizard Wizard deftly shoots at the Rinos, who are not at all happy about it and decide to just run off the map instead of fighting back. The countryside is splattered in Rino blood as Lizard Wizard attempts to hone his craft.   Ever since the deconstruction of the wagon and the attack by the Vultures, our animals have sought refuge indoors. The bunnines however, having no food source and unable to be captured by our animal trainers, died of starvation. A small memorial was held, but our fight must go on. Our ducks however are thriving. The rest of the winter passes, and our friends have busied themselves: - smoothing the fortress (probably 60% done) - expanding storage areas (blocks and bolts are on high alert for building) - finishing the dig for the reservoir (still needs a chain for the Well, but the hole is dug in the dining area!) - Death Sext has become a fisherdwarf, no dwarves have died, and many of our original dwarves find themsevles frustrated by the lack of booze (Although we have quite a bit of cave wheat, which I think can be brewed, but our crew has been pretty busy with the yellow brick road project.)  Here's Chillheads!Level 1:  Level 2:  Level 3:  Level 4:  There are more layers below this for water runoff storage and the mining operation. vanisher fucked around with this message at 05:09 on Dec 19, 2016
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Dec 19, 2016 03:15
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I have the save! I loaded it up. I also applied a graphic set, which I'll remove before I turn it back in, I just think it makes for prettier screenshots. First thing I did was look at the stockpile screen. Hmmm, looks like we haven't had much time for bookkeeping. I checked and saw if we had anybody with the gift for organizing yet:  Looks like Plebian Parasite is our new bookkeeper! He can fulfill his bookkeeping duties while continuing with his engraving project, but first off he gets an office. |
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Dec 19, 2016 06:58
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 04:55 |
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gently caress YEAH BOOK KEEPING |
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Dec 19, 2016 07:04
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