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deep dish peat moss

On a planet that increasingly resembles one huge Maximum Security prison, the only intelligent choice is to plan a jail break.

Wearing a weave but for different body parts, like "drat Helga those extra fingers are sexy girl! Are they a weave?"

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Farg

it was something like "will thou fight draw thy sword vile beast* but thats as far as i got

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

Manifisto




erotic hot dog vendor

you know, like an erotic baker, but instead it's a cart selling hot dogs

*speaking loudly to somewhat flustered-looking customer peering at menu* don't know where to start, eh? well we got your Missionary, that's a classic frank in a bun, or should I say wiener haha. there's the Backdoor, the bun's upside down, very naughty . . . the Spicy Clam, that's just the bun toasted and spread with golden mustard . . .

ah, excellent choice! *holds out bare hotdog, shaking it up and down very rapidly* here you go, one Ladies' Delight . . .

PHIZ KALIFA
ABS THUNDERSKULL.

element: thunderbolts.

steed: a thunderbolt.

slogan/motto: "gonna clap them cheeks like a Thunderskull."

what do you call a joke with no punchline

mods only know two things: eat hot grape and lie

Manifisto




unicorn frappuccino

notice of this just landed in my inbox

something something virgins, instant comedy!

City of Glompton




Manifisto posted:

unicorn frappuccino

notice of this just landed in my inbox

something something virgins, instant comedy!

q: this tastes nothing like a real unicorn, what gives?

a: that's because factory-farmed unicorns are bred for color, not flavor.





thank you vanisher!

cda

"Ok, who took a poo poo right here, in the middle of Disneyworld?"

Nosfereefer


something about the chronic shortages of punch leading to the conclusion of soviet jokes

cda

cda posted:

"Ok, who took a poo poo right here, in the middle of Disneyworld?"

"Nobody's leaving until we find out who took a poo poo here, in the middle of Disneyworld."


sig by vanisher

Android Blues


deep dish peat moss posted:

Wearing a weave but for different body parts, like "drat Helga those extra fingers are sexy girl! Are they a weave?"

as good as a thread in one post, i love it

deep dish peat moss

On a planet that increasingly resembles one huge Maximum Security prison, the only intelligent choice is to plan a jail break.

cda posted:

"Nobody's leaving until we find out who took a poo poo here, in the middle of Disneyworld."

The exact center of the Universe is right here, we all revolve around this poo poo that someone took here, in the middle of Disneyworld.

deep dish peat moss

On a planet that increasingly resembles one huge Maximum Security prison, the only intelligent choice is to plan a jail break.

Different kind of *punk, like cyberpunk and steampunk but new things. Of course there's Weedpunk where the earth is covered by a dense, slowing fog and the sun has gone ultraviolet, and Netpunk where everyone lives on one of those endless black gridded planes in the digital world.

Fuck My Ass

when it's only the first date and your date whips out their byob post count and it's bigger than yours

Robot Made of Meat


cda posted:

"Ok, who took a poo poo right here, in the middle of Disneyworld?"

Bob Iger: "Dammit! I KNEW Till Eulenspiegel's Wild Ride was a bad idea."

Robot Made of Meat fucked around with this message at 01:30 on Apr 20, 2017


Thanks to Manifisto for the sig!

Plebian Parasite


Cybershorts, so like you have to plug them in and the pockets are called matterpods and the holes you put your feet through are legjacks

cda

Plebian Parasite posted:

Cybershorts, so like you have to plug them in and the pockets are called matterpods and the holes you put your feet through are legjacks

I'm listening....


sig by vanisher

Fuck My Ass

a pair of pants that has easy access heated spaghetti pockets

Admiral_eX_laX

Historically Inaccurate

A calorie friend who can swoop in when you're eating bad stuff and eat some of it for you.

Macnult


decorating paper cuts and suffering for fashion



both sigs courtesy of kaiser schnitzel

Plebian Parasite


my family becoming bloated and irritable after my handmade corncob pipe etsy takes off and they shift to an all corn diet to keep up with demand.

Fuck My Ass

Plebian Parasite posted:

my family becoming bloated and irritable after my handmade corncob pipe etsy takes off and they shift to an all corn diet to keep up with demand.

Laurenz

They call him little janny hotpockets. He was terrific, he was the best, and he did it for free too.

gently caress My rear end posted:

a pair of pants that has easy access heated spaghetti pockets

Robot Made of Meat


gently caress My rear end posted:

a pair of pants that has easy access heated spaghetti pockets

This may well violate the patent for Hulk Hogan Meat Shoes.


Thanks to Manifisto for the sig!

Fuck My Ass

Robot Made of Meat posted:

This may well violate the patent for Hulk Hogan Meat Shoes.

that post definitely contained meat

vanisher



Breaking News: Top vegan competitive eater literally shits themselves to death



Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, PSP, & Death Sext

vanisher



Restaurant 'Fridays' makes bold marketing move by renaming itself 'Everydays' in attempt to bolster sales, depressed single 40+ year old office workers revolt



Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, PSP, & Death Sext

Piso Mojado


foot notes - a thread of funny and sweet notes left by my foot.


Piso Mojado


a thread about this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ms_S3sd5JzU


vanisher



Facebook buys YTMND.com for 32 Million, all baby and kid photos are now looped in with short music track



Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, PSP, & Death Sext

Fuck My Ass

vanisher posted:

Facebook buys YTMND.com for 32 Million, all baby and kid photos are now looped in with short music track

deep dish peat moss

On a planet that increasingly resembles one huge Maximum Security prison, the only intelligent choice is to plan a jail break.

Kid Rock becoming a world-renowned geologist and renaming Earth's mantle the Baw Wit Da Baw Da Bang A Dang Diggy Layer

deep dish peat moss

On a planet that increasingly resembles one huge Maximum Security prison, the only intelligent choice is to plan a jail break.

Plebian Parasite posted:

Cybershorts, so like you have to plug them in and the pockets are called matterpods and the holes you put your feet through are legjacks

Fuck My Ass

deep dish peat moss posted:

Kid Rock becoming a world-renowned geologist and renaming Earth's mantle the Baw Wit Da Baw Da Bang A Dang Diggy Layer

deep dish peat moss

On a planet that increasingly resembles one huge Maximum Security prison, the only intelligent choice is to plan a jail break.

Buying a house, getting it cheap because it's in the Friend Zone.

cda

deep dish peat moss posted:

Buying a house, getting it cheap because it's in the Friend Zone.

Sexy Woman Realtor: So, what do you think? 4 bedrooms, 3 and a half baths, hardwood floors throughout, newly furnished... All for under 100K

Me: What, is it some kind of murder house?

Sexy Woman Realtor: *tossing hair back in a way that could be alluring or maybe her hair was just in her face* No, not at all.

Me: I love you so much for finding me this house.

Sexy Woman Realtor: *slight pause* Thanks. That's very nice of you to say.

Me: ... And there's nothing wrong with it? Why's it so cheap?

SWR: it's in the Friend Zone.

Me: I KNEW it! Why didn't you just tell me?

SWR: Look at how you're acting! That's why I didn't tell you.

slowm

live slow, die whenevs

Bachelor of farts

If I fart and my girlfriend doesn't hear it does it make a sound

Pooping face down on the diaper station

Early warning signs that your friends are reading vice magazine articles

Eat his rear end sea bass

death sext



it's like deadliest warrior except instead of a samurai vs spetsnaz it's a ghost vs a skeleton and we all discuss the various pros and cons of being a ghost and skeleton warrior

ex. little ghosts can merge and form one big ghost but a skeleton can hold a gun


Bacon Taco

Now with extra narwhal meat!
HAIKOOLIGAN

deep dish peat moss posted:

Kid Rock becoming a world-renowned geologist and renaming Earth's mantle the Baw Wit Da Baw Da Bang A Dang Diggy Layer

Kid Rock visiting the White House with Sarah Palin and Ted Nugent



Fuck My Ass

cda posted:

Sexy Woman Realtor: So, what do you think? 4 bedrooms, 3 and a half baths, hardwood floors throughout, newly furnished... All for under 100K

Me: What, is it some kind of murder house?

Sexy Woman Realtor: *tossing hair back in a way that could be alluring or maybe her hair was just in her face* No, not at all.

Me: I love you so much for finding me this house.

Sexy Woman Realtor: *slight pause* Thanks. That's very nice of you to say.

Me: ... And there's nothing wrong with it? Why's it so cheap?

SWR: it's in the Friend Zone.

Me: I KNEW it! Why didn't you just tell me?

SWR: Look at how you're acting! That's why I didn't tell you.

ahahahahahhahahahahaah

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cda

slowm posted:

Eat his rear end sea bass


sig by vanisher

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