|
|
wearing a tracksuit to make yourself look athletic and then a cool person says you look fit and we call it stealing velour
|
#
¿
Jul 30, 2019 23:30
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ Apr 26, 2024 17:00 |
|
|
|
Goons Are Great posted:To protect and chill *plants weed on self*
|
|
#
¿
Aug 10, 2019 06:45
|
|
|
|
vanisher posted:Hiring an ubereats to steal Amazon packages around town and deliver them to my house having 2 eat the nintendo switch they stole for me
|
|
#
¿
Aug 10, 2019 10:20
|
|
|
|
canyoneer posted:turns out the g in "angus beef" is NOT silent and now i am very embarrassed at this outback steakhouse turns out the g in g'day is
|
|
#
¿
Aug 11, 2019 03:46
|
|
|
|
magic cactus posted:A$AP Rocky's Fables the tortoise and the hurr
|
|
#
¿
Aug 11, 2019 23:48
|
|
|
|
google THIS posted:Nursery Crimes I don't know if you wanna go back there detective, looks like the victim wasn't made of sugar, spice, or anything nice
|
|
#
¿
Aug 15, 2019 03:08
|
|
|
|
every living thing do not gently caress i for one bud and sometimes spore
|
|
#
¿
Aug 15, 2019 15:54
|
|
|
|
google THIS posted:(swirling liquid in glass) Hmm, I'm getting notes of concord.. (takes a long, overly noisy sniff) ...from concentrate. (takes a tiny sip, sucks air through teeth and smacks lips) 10% juice. (spits into bucket) With other natural flavors. *brings tour group to bucket* and here the liquid refuse will age, tamping down the bitter tang of nitrates
|
|
#
¿
Aug 17, 2019 03:00
|
|
|
|
a gluten-free diet taken by recovering rear end eaters
|
|
#
¿
Aug 17, 2019 16:53
|
|
|
|
Captain Billy Pissboy posted:a homeopathic drug dealer me: hey man do you got any crystal? my dealer: what u looking for quartz? rose quartz?
|
|
#
¿
Aug 18, 2019 20:22
|
|
|
|
alnilam posted:oh man we had a really good thread long ago about olive gardens unlimited breadsticks, does anyone know how to find it dang that sound good nut fucked around with this message at 01:24 on Aug 19, 2019
|
|
#
¿
Aug 19, 2019 01:03
|
|
|
|
Debbie Does Diamond Dallas Page
|
|
#
¿
Aug 20, 2019 02:42
|
|
|
|
alnilam posted:give me the cool S
|
|
#
¿
Aug 20, 2019 04:00
|
|
|
|
Jolo posted:The only cool S I need: 
|
|
#
¿
Aug 20, 2019 22:35
|
|
|
|
imposter syndrome me: i dunno what to tell you doc, i try to reread them over once or twice to make sure im getting a giggle out of them before hitting submit my therapist: and that's exactly why I am here--over the course of the next months we're going to help you come to terms with the fact that you are a bad poster.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 21, 2019 19:04
|
|
|
|
Jolo posted:impoyster syndrome:
|
|
#
¿
Aug 21, 2019 19:44
|
|
|
|
me rushing into the room: doc, sorry to burst in, I just had to see you, I've been up all night researching and I have reason to believe I have imposter syndrome in the second person my mom waking up: go back to bed
|
|
#
¿
Aug 21, 2019 19:46
|
|
|
|
the therapist talking to my hot and strong wife: it's not great--he's presenting with the textbook symptoms of a deep-seated prosecution complex me: Objection, your honour! I believe the plaintiff is referring to a persecution complex. therapist: no...no I am not.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 21, 2019 19:53
|
|
|
|
me: so doc what's the diagnosis? the flu? doc: a cold me: ah okay hm, shingles?
|
|
#
¿
Aug 21, 2019 22:43
|
|
|
|
here is an op i was making (but when i find myself putting too much effort into a post i know it will not b a good thread so here is just hte post) in this joke bob vila helps you fix up ur posts with modernity and mature experience know-how isn't htat right bob (it's right). On today's show we're going to unveil a recent bee eater post renovation we've been working on in secret for the past 10-20 min. The first, the post in question:  yeesh what a mess! Out of touch and encouraging bad habits (vibing), now let me show you what i managed 2 whip up: 
|
|
#
¿
Aug 22, 2019 00:26
|
|
|
|
Heather Papps posted:do it do it right now do it ok but i warned u
|
|
#
¿
Aug 22, 2019 01:27
|
|
|
|
cash em all outside how bou dat
|
|
#
¿
Aug 22, 2019 15:42
|
|
|
|
cool poo poo u can say after yoga rather than lame rear end trick rear end tried and old and told "namaste"
|
|
#
¿
Aug 23, 2019 23:31
|
|
|
|
vanisher posted:i'd love expert advice on brooding in general listen to dashboard confessional
|
|
#
¿
Aug 24, 2019 03:19
|
|
|
|
i'd like to present to the court my "god isn't real because check out where else this banana fits perfectly" defense
|
|
#
¿
Aug 24, 2019 03:23
|
|
|
|
what if you just gave the camera a peace sign after you finished
|
|
#
¿
Aug 24, 2019 14:16
|
|
|
|
there goes bee eater, he's always about that peace
|
|
#
¿
Aug 24, 2019 14:16
|
|
|
|
SweetWillyRollbar posted:Medium: I caught him on the counter.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 25, 2019 12:10
|
|
|
|
Heather Papps posted:the first clear picture of bigfoot or a ghost but like, their dick is showing and they get really mad about it Petersout-Gimlin film
|
|
#
¿
Aug 25, 2019 13:36
|
|
|
|
Heather Papps posted:accusing other posters of being my sockpuppets or something. i think that could be really funny but also maybe risky? people take the internet very seriously. lol! so much this!
|
|
#
¿
Aug 26, 2019 14:07
|
|
|
|
ShinyBirdTeeth posted:Youth pastor energy but recruiting people to my sex cult. Hey guys, let's rap about the big truth! *spins chair around and sits down on it backwards but he's naked and it's this chair* 
|
|
#
¿
Aug 26, 2019 15:01
|
|
|
|
magic cactus posted:The Military Industrial Complex, Like Hollywood before it, has run out of ideas and is just creating pointless sequels to the conspiracy theories we know and love in a cheap and cynical attempt to cash in on nostalgia. 9/12 was an inside job
|
|
#
¿
Aug 26, 2019 18:24
|
|
|
|
canyoneer posted:walking through a warzone chanting "sniper no snipey! sniper no snipey!"
|
|
#
¿
Aug 28, 2019 19:01
|
|
|
|
magic's biggest secrets finally revealed david blaine is ascared of geese houdini kept a small key and a pack of gum in his butt
|
|
#
¿
Aug 29, 2019 03:25
|
|
|
|
SweetWillyRollbar posted:Tantric high-fiving. chads hand is sweating and he no longer will look me in the eye, i thought we were bros but i'm starting to question his commitment to achieving ultimate seshing. if he slips we will have to kill him for knowing the coordinates of the man cave (my basement). he does not understand the gravity of the situation tho his shaking elbow does
|
|
#
¿
Aug 31, 2019 12:35
|
|
|
|
"Pen & Teller," and it's just a 30 minute show about my most recent trip to the bank.
|
|
#
¿
Sep 1, 2019 15:02
|
|
|
|
SweetWillyRollbar posted:The Matrix crew bullet times all of their lunch breaks so construction always takes forever. lmfbo
|
|
#
¿
Sep 12, 2019 12:31
|
|
|
|
albany academy posted:Who's a good boy?! Is it you? It must be, because there's only two of us here in this room, and last I checked I'm a grown-rear end man. dad?
|
|
#
¿
Sep 14, 2019 04:09
|
|
|
|
magic cactus posted:Film noir monologues updated for 2019: She walked into the room, the click of the heels, legs up to here *intricately uses my hands to mimic the hockey stick graph of global temperature increase in the 1900s*
|
|
#
¿
Sep 16, 2019 02:57
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ Apr 26, 2024 17:00 |
|
|
|
Who is your favourite character from the Sly Cooper video game universe? Mine is Sly Cooper.
|
|
#
¿
Sep 16, 2019 21:20
|
|