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Goats would be a poor investment, since all the grass in Florida is full of death ants (source: I'm not allowed to play in the grass at Grandma's house!  ) . But a gator farm might work. Zaurg, have you ever thought about opening your own Gatorland franchise?e: I have to assume most of the lovely stuff left with Zwife. IIRC the pool table was actually sold.
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Sep 21, 2017 17:38
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Gators don't eat grass. It could be a saving on child care in the medium term though.
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Sep 22, 2017 00:53
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Fleta Mcgurn posted:e: I have to assume most of the lovely stuff left with Zwife. IIRC the pool table was actually sold.
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Sep 22, 2017 16:55
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It's almost October and he still hasn't posted his August spending
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Sep 24, 2017 00:43
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He's not going to. This summer's manic episode has passed.
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Sep 24, 2017 01:39
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I just tell myself he went back on his meds and everything is fine.
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Sep 24, 2017 06:57
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Most likely is his house flooded and last month he decided to cancel flood insurance because he didn't want to cut the $80 lawn care service instead
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Sep 24, 2017 07:15
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Zaurus took this opportunity to quietly build a crude raft of wonderhangers, put fake glasses on himself and the kids, and sail to a new, debt-free future in Cuba.
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Sep 24, 2017 08:30
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his gf got pregnant "by accident" coz they were still loving before "breaking up" lol that's my guess
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Sep 25, 2017 23:17
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zaurg posted:Yes, that's it. Let's go with that. It might even be true so we can go with that as the primary reason. E/N stuff done. Is she joining the military
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Sep 26, 2017 05:25
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Maybe they met a lovely third during their break-up marathon vacation and now their relationship is whole. Because zuarg has 2 wives to spend his money now.
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Sep 26, 2017 14:16
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polyamory wins again
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Sep 26, 2017 15:17
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Post your numbers, you hot dog head.
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Oct 1, 2017 10:55
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Nocheez posted:Fair warning to those not used to Zaurg threads: You will waste lots of time trying to help, but nothing will happen except what Zaurg already wants to do. He claims to want the help and to appreciate the advice, but his actions will leave you exasperated and dumbstruck. Wow, I was way off. Zaurg didn't even do the baseline of appearing to try to improve this time.
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Oct 10, 2017 17:51
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Nocheez posted:Wow, I was way off. Zaurg didn't even do the baseline of appearing to try to improve this time. He came in here last year with a decent-looking outlook on life and managed to gently caress it up already. Rad. I wanted more updates on Z-ex's thousand-dollar Candy Crush purchases, too!
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Oct 10, 2017 17:55
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Looks like my simple goal of not spending more than he earns in a month was too much.
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Oct 11, 2017 01:19
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Devian666 posted:Looks like my simple goal of not spending more than he earns in a month was too much. Stop being unreasonable.
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Oct 11, 2017 01:59
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Devian666 posted:Looks like my simple goal of not spending more than he earns in a month was too much. Sure, if I made like a million dollar a month or something.
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Oct 11, 2017 03:13
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FrozenVent posted:Sure, if I made like a million dollar a month or something. Those in-app purchases of coins are brutal.
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Oct 11, 2017 03:18
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Nocheez posted:Wow, I was way off. Zaurg didn't even do the baseline of appearing to try to improve this time. oh I improved all right! Spent too much time improving my marathon time by 35 minutes to a 3:34  Life is goodI'll improve finance stuff but I dug myself a nice drat hole over the past 1-2 months. I promise to post stats and get this thread moving in the right direction by Sunday 10/15 or ya'll should flush this thread and ban me. Please give me till 10/15.
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Oct 12, 2017 04:43
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That should be a toxx...
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Oct 12, 2017 05:50
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zaurg posted:oh I improved all right! Spent too much time improving my marathon time by 35 minutes to a 3:34 You won't improve anything. You'll kick the can down the road, and make excuses. You act like you can't decrease your marathon time AND your spending at the same time.
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Oct 12, 2017 11:50
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Ultimate Mango posted:That should be a toxx...
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Oct 12, 2017 11:59
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If you improve your marathon times enough maybe you'll be able to run away from your responsibilities
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Oct 12, 2017 14:35
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Run on the lawn after you mow it.
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Oct 12, 2017 15:08
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CharlestonJew posted:If you improve your marathon times enough maybe you'll be able to run away from your responsibilities He’s already missed the chance to dispute paternity 
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Oct 12, 2017 17:25
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Good Parmesan posted:Run on the lawn after you mow it. Hot! Sexy! Totally not Zaurg. We should all report that post when he doesn’t deliver.
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Oct 13, 2017 05:51
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Working on this this morning. When I said 10/15 I meant give me all of 10/15 before banning, thank you.Giraffe posted:Taking out the Misc and Blow, you spent $3579 of your $4595 in July on categories with very little discretionary latitude. That leaves you with about $1000 a month for everything else. Every meal out, all clothes and shoes for you and the kids, car repairs, birthday presents, football games, etc. That $1000 will be very easy to burn through even without unexpected surprises, which are definitely going to happen. Cutting down on your grocery bill, utilities and insurance wherever possible will help a lot. Find an extra $200/month in there and stick it in savings every month. Then start carefully monitoring your spending throughout each month to see if you can learn the discipline you'll need to cut out extras before that $1000 runs out. The only purpose of the budget is to get you to rein in your spending when you need to. Ideally, you'll be able to end each month with another $200 or more surplus so you're prepared when the car breaks down or the roof caves in. Best post ever.
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Oct 15, 2017 12:15
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Hahaha, you're so getting banned.
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Oct 15, 2017 14:56
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What a clusterfuck I am. I started this thread at the wrong time when I knew I had a vacation planned for October that would rack up a bunch of $$. I didn't track crap the past 2.5 months so I spent all morning trying to backtrack looking at a mountain of receipts and looking through credit card statements and checkbook. I know I'm still missing a couple things... oldest daughter's school aftercare which is $240/month even though she only goes about 3 hours twice a week. Need to look into if they have an hourly option that is cheaper. The August $580 summer camp expense some should go back into July. youngest daughter I'm now paying half the pre-K expenses which is $120 per week so I'll add that. As you can see I got rid of "Misc" and "Blow" and tried to add it all into a "Discretionary" category along the lines of what Giraffe suggested, so I can just focus on that # going forward. August Income $4,954 Savings $250 5% Retirement $305 6% Expenses $5,296 107% Housing $1,750 35% Insurance $454 9% Utilities $533 11% Auto $99 2% Childcare $580 12% Debt $100 2% Disc-Grocery $625 13% Disc-Gym $21 0% Disc-Entertainment $171 3% Disc-Fees $9 0% Disc-Clothing $198 4% Disc-KidsSchoolStuff $- 0% Disc-Medical $256 5% Disc-Running $214 4% Disc-Vacation $- 0% Disc-Restaurants $163 3% Disc-Gifts $97 2% Disc-Misc $25 1% Discretionary Total = $1,755 35% ***some of childcare 580 needs to go to July September Category Totals Income $4,954 Savings $250 5% Retirement $305 6% Expenses $4,207 85% Housing $1,750 35% Insurance $454 9% Utilities $389 8% Auto $73 1% Childcare $- 0% Debt $100 2% Disc-Grocery $698 14% Disc-Gym $21 0% Disc-Entertainment $30 1% Disc-Fees $44 1% Disc-Clothing $- 0% Disc-KidsSchoolStuff $- 0% Disc-Medical $- 0% Disc-Running $43 1% Disc-Vacation $107 2% Disc-Restaurants $248 5% Disc-Gifts $219 4% Disc-Misc $30 1% Discretionary Total = $1,411 28% ***MISSING daughter1 VPK $240 for month and daughter2 aftercare $240 for month October Category Totals Income $4,954 Savings $250 5% Retirement $305 6% Expenses $3,903 79% Housing $1,750 35% Insurance $454 9% Utilities $468 9% Auto $31 1% Childcare $- 0% Debt $100 2% Disc-Grocery $134 3% Disc-Gym $21 0% Disc-Entertainment $29 1% Disc-Fees $2 0% Disc-Clothing $- 0% Disc-KidsSchoolStuff $- 0% Disc-Medical $78 2% Disc-Running $27 1% Disc-Vacation $771 16% Disc-Restaurants $15 0% Disc-Gifts $- 0% Disc-Misc $24 0% Discretionary Total = $1,076 22% ***MISSING daughter1 VPK $240 for month and daughter2 aftercare $240 for month zaurg fucked around with this message at 18:13 on Oct 15, 2017 |
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Oct 15, 2017 18:11
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*makes common sense suggestion which is utterly ignored*
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Oct 15, 2017 18:56
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Where's the lawncare expense?
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Oct 15, 2017 19:02
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DoctorTristan posted:Where's the lawncare expense? poo poo I think it's in Utilities I should move to Discretionary shouldn't I? You guys are still really hammering away
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Oct 15, 2017 19:22
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I have to know how the vacation total breaks down.
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Oct 15, 2017 19:24
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zaurg, YOU CANNOT AFFORD LAWNCARE. YOU ARE POOR. YOU CAN BARELY AFFORD GAS FOR YOUR MOWER. Sincerely, BFC
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Oct 15, 2017 19:25
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Fleta Mcgurn posted:I have to know how the vacation total breaks down. Hotel Restaurants Rental Car and gas Parks 2 drinks on the plane I think that was it.
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Oct 15, 2017 19:53
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zaurg posted:Hotel You know if you bought first class tickets, you'd get those drinks for free and save a few bucks.
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Oct 15, 2017 19:56
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My dude you are literally more dedicated to not getting banned on SA than you are to not spending every penny you make
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Oct 15, 2017 19:58
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Shugojin posted:My dude you are literally more dedicated to not getting banned on SA than you are to not spending every penny you make Only spending what he earns would be a massive improvement. Zaurg, how are you going to bring your spending under control?
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Oct 15, 2017 20:10
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DoctorTristan posted:Zaurg, how are you going to bring your spending under control? I'm going to do what Giraffe suggested. 4950 = Monthly Income 3875 = "Regular" expenses that are mostly paid automatically --------------- 1750 Mortgage 430 Health Ins 25 Life Ins 150 Electric 150 Water (every 2 months) 65 Cell 50 Internet 80 Lawn 240 Aftercare 240 Pre-K 100 Loan repayment 250 Savings-Emergency Fund 305 Savings-Retirement 20 Gym 20 Google Play Music and Netflix --------------- That leaves 1075. Let's say an even 1000 extra every month to cover Grocery, Auto, Medical, Clothes, and fun poo poo. This doesn't mean I shouldn't work on lowering the "regular" expenses like Cell, Internet, Lawn, but for right now my focus is controlling that remaining 1000. How will I control it? I need to keep a daily $ remaining from the 1000. Google spreadsheet, accessible anywhere, no excuse not to check it in a second. I screwed myself for October already and it's only the 15th. Already OVER the 1000 at about 1034. So I'll just tighten down as much as possible, I have nothing left. Only truly necessities.
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Oct 15, 2017 20:32
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