"Epic Viral Obituary"

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Lowtax: Nov 16, 1999; by Skyl3lazer

This is where we are as a society. This is what we've become. No, not just an epic obituary. This is an epic viral obituary. How long do you think we have before we return to communicating like cavemen again, by solely using emojis?

Or perhaps I'm overreacting due to my intense and passionate loathing of the internet in general, and the dumbed down, narrowed lexicon of cliches it has driven us to. I ended a sentence with a proposition there and I give no gently caress because this is about epic viral obituaries for the win.

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# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:35

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 07:57

Peachfart: Jan 21, 2017

Lowtax posted:

This is where we are as a society. This is what we've become. No, not just an epic obituary. This is an epic viral obituary. How long do you think we have before we return to communicating like cavemen again, by solely using emojis?

Or perhaps I'm overreacting due to my intense and passionate loathing of the internet in general, and the dumbed down, narrowed lexicon of cliches it has driven us to. I ended a sentence with a proposition there and I give no gently caress because this is about epic viral obituaries for the win.

The internet was a mistake, burn it all down

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:37

house of the dad: Jul 4, 2005

Should read "epic cancer obituary." I loving love science

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:37

Kuros: Sep 13, 2010; Oh look, the consequences of my prior actions are finally catching up to me.

house of the dad posted:

Should read "epic cancer obituary." I loving love science

That would only be appropriate if he was dying from a virus.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:38

Verisimilidude: Dec 20, 2006; Strike quick and hurry at him,
not caring to hit or miss.
So that you dishonor him before the judges

we've reached peak internet

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:41

fatal oopsie-daisy: Jul 30, 2007; by R. Guyovich

He also wrote it 100% himself

That kid�s name?

Abert Einstein.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:41

Palpek: Dec 27, 2008; Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.

They should use a more appropriate phrase like "empathy porn".

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:41

Mozi: Apr 4, 2004; Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die; Nap Ghost

cancer virus ftw, definitely

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:42

house of the dad: Jul 4, 2005

Cancer kid has wowed the nation by dying a premature and tragic death

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:43

Donovan Trip: Jan 6, 2007

Cancer and he melted his own heart? this boy is certainly le epic!!!

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:45

hevnz 2 murgatroyd: Apr 13, 2018; by Smythe

This was my favourite episode of Little Big Shots

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:46

onedayholiday: Dec 6, 2013; Grimey Drawer

buy our t-shirts to show ur support for the kid or whatever!
paypal, mastercard, solo, and switch accepted!

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:47

Devils Affricate: Jan 22, 2010

One dead kid's weird secret to writing epic obituaries - Website owners HATE him!

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:47

damn horror queefs: Oct 14, 2005; say hello
say hello to the man in the elevator

BREAKING NEWS: Babby epically pwnd by mortality; is "sum n00b xD", according to inside sources.

More updates after weather and e-sports.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:50

Commie Lasorda: May 15, 2009; IT'S CLOBBERIN' TIME!

I don't want to be remembered by the measure of my character, nor my accomplishments, no... I want people to remember me via a crudely cropped still from some popular movie franchise with a misattributed quote emblazoned across it in impact font

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:56

numberoneposter: Feb 19, 2014; How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

get in and get out early, well done dead kid :thumbsup:

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:56

cnut: May 3, 2016

Thoughts and prayers

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:58

Lumpy the Cook: Feb 4, 2011; Drippy-goo-yay, mother-gunker!

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:02

Soup du Journey: Mar 20, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

hm maybe if more kids died i would feel even better.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:09

Beefeater: May 17, 2003; I'm hungry.; Hair Elf

Devils Affricate posted:

One dead kid's weird secret to writing epic obituaries - Website owners HATE him!

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:12

SuperiorColliculus: Oct 31, 2011

house of the dad posted:

Should read "epic cancer obituary." I loving love science

Taxman, please do the needful and change my username to "epic cancer obituary"

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:17

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

Well, you got your five minutes of fame alright

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:19

shame on an IGA: Apr 8, 2005

Jesus, kid isn't even original.

http://obit.carnesfuneralhome.com/leslie-ray-charping

e: lmao there's a flash flood watch and severe thunderstorms in the forecast, those bounce houses will bring him plenty of company in valhalla tomorrow.

shame on an IGA fucked around with this message at 22:29 on Jul 13, 2018

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:25

bitmap: Aug 8, 2006

I am simultaneously conflicted between the personal good SA has done for me and the cancer that the internet in general has manifested for mankind at large

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:27

bitmap: Aug 8, 2006

shame on an IGA posted:

Jesus, kid isn't even original.

http://obit.carnesfuneralhome.com/leslie-ray-charping

You have the best username on this website

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:28

LordArgh: Mar 17, 2009; Nap Ghost

joke's on him. death is the end. oblivion. he won't see anything ever

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:31

gbs but from 2004: Oct 24, 2004; wow u rude pig

"i STarTed this TOIlEt Of A tHreaD aNd HAve sOmEHOW aVoidEd A red teXt"

Can�t wait for the Facebook masses to stop giving a gently caress about this kid and forget about the whole thing like Kony 2012

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:31

HugeGrossBurrito: Mar 20, 2018

gbs but from 2004 posted:

Can�t wait for the Facebook masses to stop giving a gently caress about this kid and forget about the whole thing like Kony 2012

It was worth it for the guy flipping out and jacking off in a parking lot

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:32

Ginette Reno: Nov 18, 2006; How Doers get more done; Fun Shoe

All it's missing is a 99% post of you won't re-post this, but 1% of you will.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:34

shame on an IGA: Apr 8, 2005

Posting #KONY2012 all over facebook is my favorite new years day tradition

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:35

Mameluke: Aug 2, 2013; by Fluffdaddy

Lumpy the Cook posted:

You can pretty much post this in every thread on our forums

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:35

Brother Tadger: Feb 15, 2012; I'm accidentally a suicide bomber!

Epic Malignant Obituary

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:36

judge reinhold: Jul 26, 2001

Lumpy the Cook posted:

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:39

shame on an IGA: Apr 8, 2005

one of the most brutal self owns I've ever seen irl is a gravestone in Columbia SC with a PSX controller carved onto it.

not even a dual shock.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:42

Lowtax: Nov 16, 1999; by Skyl3lazer

shame on an IGA posted:

one of the most brutal self owns I've ever seen irl is a gravestone in Columbia SC with a PSX controller carved onto it.

not even a dual shock.

drat, this dead and embalmed guy would hate that poo poo

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# ? Jul 13, 2018 23:31

Lowtax: Nov 16, 1999; by Skyl3lazer

Lowtax posted:

drat, this dead and embalmed guy would hate that poo poo

When I die please pose me in a way that I am advertising miscellaneous products, from beyond the grave.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 23:33

Sucrose: Dec 9, 2009

Lowtax posted:

This is where we are as a society. This is what we've become. No, not just an epic obituary. This is an epic viral obituary. How long do you think we have before we return to communicating like cavemen again, by solely using emojis?

Or perhaps I'm overreacting due to my intense and passionate loathing of the internet in general, and the dumbed down, narrowed lexicon of cliches it has driven us to. I ended a sentence with a proposition there and I give no gently caress because this is about epic viral obituaries for the win.

wow what a heartwarming take on a small child dying of cancer. i'm glad the media is there to let us see the silver lining in everything, even things that are objectively awful and examples of why the universe is cruel and uncaring.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 23:37

Fur20: Nov 14, 2007; すご▞い！
君は働か░い
フ▙▓ズなんだね！

shame on an IGA posted:

Jesus, kid isn't even original.

http://obit.carnesfuneralhome.com/leslie-ray-charping

e: lmao there's a flash flood watch and severe thunderstorms in the forecast, those bounce houses will bring him plenty of company in valhalla tomorrow.

this child knows not the fires of war, and valhalla will turn him away at the gates. but this vain viral video does qualify him for the third circle of hell, where devils wearing crude caricature masks of his face will taunt him as he's forced to watch them reenact this video for all eternity

e: they'll probably read the youtube comments to him as well. truly a fate worse than death. rein in your vices

Fur20 fucked around with this message at 23:40 on Jul 13, 2018

# ? Jul 13, 2018 23:38