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As this post is updated as we go along, the glorious Champions League logo, soon to be plastered everywhere as per the UEFA Champions League new media campaign outline, that loving logo shall act as a separator between each Qualification Round for as long as I can be bothered updating the op. Here it is, in case you forgot what it looks like. Enjoy. What the hell people? There’s football being played right now! Should you care? Well, probably not, unless you have a horse in this race. Like Legia Warsaw. It’s the Champions League for the also-runs, also known as the Champions League qualification stage. Football for the less fortunate, the disenfranchised and the literal worst shitshows Europe has to offer. And Legia Warsaw.  Before we get to the nitty gritty, a little background is in order. You see, starting with this season, UEFA, the corrupt sprawling billion-euro morass (think Apple) that rules European football with an iron fist, are introducing a new, revolutionary, unprecedented qualification stage of their flagship tournament. This year, Europe’s 1% has decided to make things extra competitive and exciting. To guarantee this new level of excitement, the ruling body spent months taking bribes and designing a whole new way of screwing smaller clubs over. Thus, virtually guaranteeing we’ll never see these Untermensch, and Legia Warsaw, in football Valhalla ever again. And there was much rejoicing.  Make no mistake, you twats are missing out on some real quality football.  So how does this poo poo show work? Well, how about I leave that to UEFA to explain. a literal pack of cunts posted:
Confused? But wait, there’s more. those same cunts, again posted:Champions route (four group places) Sounds like a literal Thunderdome. Doesn’t all this make you thank your chosen deity for being born a glorious Aryan or a descendant of the Conquistadores, or a plastic American, rather than a Slav Untermensch slave from the lowland communist marshes? And to top it all off, Real and Atletico hosed it up for everyone by winning the CL and the EL and qualifying through their domestic campaigns, so, naturally, some clubs got an automatic bump to the next qualifying stage. This is why we're seeing some really strange teams in really strange places. But enough of this bullshit. Where’s the foot you dumb Polack?! We’re already in the return leg of these hunger games, so without further ado, here are tonight’s hotly contested match ups. Including Legia Warsaw. If you’re wondering where to watch these games, I have no idea. Suffice to say, Legia’s away leg was broadcast via a 240p stream on their official site, because Cork couldn’t afford a professional tv crew to produce an HD signal. If you read this far, you are loving insane. Check yourself, because you obviously wreck yourself. Let the games begin! Wait, who is playing who again? Who are these people? Aren't there some friendlies on I could watch instead? HJK  - Vikingur (2-1)I have no idea who either of these teams are, and neither do you. If you really want to know, HJK are from Helsinki. They won the league. A lot. They probably are the league tbh. Not much luck in Europe though. Vikingur hail from the European powerhouse of Faroe Islands. I didn't even know they had a league. Jesus Christ. Valletta  – Kukesi (0-0)Valetta are from Malta. They also win the league a lot. Kukesi are from Albania. I remember them from when they lost to Legia Warsaw. The away leg was awarded to Legia, because Kukesi fans were somehow even worse than Legia’s. APOEL Nicosia  – Suduva (1-3)APOEL are from Cyprus. The Greek Cyprus. They win their fake league all the time, but unlike many other misfits in this circus medley of shitstains, they did qualify for the CL more than once, and even made the quarterfinals. A competent team by this stage standards. Suduva are from Lithuania. That’s all I know of them. Lithuania is Poland, despite what these funny people will tell you. This first leg result is probably some kind of typo. Hapoel Beer Sheva  - Flora Tallinn (4-1)Oy vey, Israeli teams forced to play with Estonian commoners. This is blatant anti-Semitism. Hapoel have been doing ok in their domestic league in recent years, winning the title several times. Flora should probably change their name, because there’s a margarine that’s a lot more famous than they are. Malmoe FF  – Drita (3-0)Malmoe are a Swedish institution. They won their domestic league like 20 times or something. They even made the European Cup final once. They even dared to Zlatan. If there is a team that might have a chance to escape UEFA’s most recent kiss of death, it’s these guys. Drita are from Kosovo and KOSOVO JE SRBIJA! TNS  - KF Shkendija (0-5)Legia Warsaw clowned TNS once, which means this team isn’t worthy of mention. I’m told the other guys are from Macedonia, never got past qualifying, but probably won a title or two. Vidi FC  - F91 Dudelange (1-1)MOL Vidi FC are Hungarian. They changed their name a lot over the years. Their hovercrafts are full of eels, and they will tell you that you have beautiful thighs, sir William. They probably won their league since they’re here with these other losers. But seriously, this is Videoton, they’re a competent club and were runners-up in the UEFA Cup many moons ago. Dudelange sounds like a team straight out of the Big Lebowski, but they’re actually from Luxembourg. Luxembourg technically lies in the superior side of Europe, but they’re too busy laundering money to care about the foot. Crvena Zvezda  - FK Spartaks (0-0)It doesn’t get better than this. Crvena Zvezda, better known as Red Star Belgrade, won the European Cup once. Now they’re forced to play in the first round of qualifiers. Seriously. loving hell. FK Spartaks are from Latvia, and that’s literally all there is to know about them. Crusaders  - Ludogorets Razgrad (0-7)Crusaders FC from the wonderful city of Belfast are the reason why other, better teams must start their qualifications early. Ludogorets are a Bulgarian team that has made quite a splash since its formation not so long ago. Not only are they EL knock-out round regulars, but have also qualified for the CL. While UEFA does what it can to keep these teams out, they do have a chance of making it. And last, but not least… actually, it really is last and least for tonight’s farce. Legia Warszawa  - Cork City (1-0)Seriously. 1-0 away to a team that couldn’t afford to swap jerseys with us. I despise everything about Legia under new ownership. I hope we go bankrupt and get relegated to the regional divisions, so the real fans can buy this club and run it properly. Having said that, Legia are 14-time Champions and 19-time domestic cup holders. We made the UEFA Cup semi-finals once, went out to Manchester United in the semis in their famous Cup Winners’ Cup winning season and we did make the CL knock-out stages once (having beaten Blackburn in the group stages), qualifying twice. I couldn’t care less about Cork, but it won’t surprise me if they actually win this tie. Legia is in shambles. That’s it for today. And tomorrow, we have these poo poo cloggers vying for your limited attention. FC Sheriff  - Torpedo Kutaisi (1-2)You may not remember FC Sheriff of Tiraspol from Moldova, but I do. They clowned (literally) Legia last season in last year’s qualifiers to the Europa League. Other than that, they seem to win their league every year. Torpedo are from Georgia, and despite their name, they aren’t very explosive on the European stage. Maybe because they always sink in the first round. Qarabag FK  - Olimpija Ljubljana (1-0)Qarabag FK are from Azerbaijan, which apparently is in Europe. They won their league 5 times in a row. They sensationally qualified for the CL last year, which is one of the reasons UEFA and the 1% hosed us all this year. NK Olimpija Ljubljana are from Slovenia. They never get past qualifying, so no one cares about thiem. Zrinjski Mostar  - Spartak Trnava (0-1)Zrinjski Mostar are from Bosnia and Herzegovina. They are known for Luka Modrić and not much else. Spartak are from Slovakia. They have had some success back in the late 60s in Czechoslovakia, getting far in both the European and the UEFA Cups, but have been largely absent from European football since then. They usually go out in the early qualification stages. Rosenborg  - Valur (0-1)Rosenborg need no introduction, and if they do, you don’t really watch European football. Their opponents Knattspyrnufélagið Valur are (surprise surprise) from Reykjavik. They’ve won a lot of domestic titles, but had to wait a decade for their latest one. Never achieved much in Europe and I doubt they will achieve anything this year either. Sutjeska  - FC Astana (0-1)FK Sutjeska Nikšić are a club from Montenegro. Not much else to say about them. FC Astana are from Kazakhstan, they have made the EL group stage (went out to Sporting in the round of 32) and are one of the reasons I’m writing this meaningless post. Celtic  - Alashkert FC (3-0)The gently caress are Celtic doing in the first qualifying round? loving lmao. Alashkert are from Armenia. Another team that shouldn’t be here, even at this stage of the tournament. Well there you have it. No one is going to watch this until the final, or at the very least, the penultimate qualification round. By then, none of these teams are going to be in the running. Have fun watching your Badrids, Farcelonas, Poonichs and Pooshiteds over and over again. gently caress you. ----- ----- Well, there we have it, day 1 of the First Round return leg is behind us. We now bid farewell to some of the worst Europe has to offer. The winners live on to fight another day. Their oftentimes delusional, yet fiercely loyal fans clutching to vain hope that maybe this year is their year and they will ascend to the pearly gates (they won’t), where they will be promptly trashed 8-4 by Bortmund and become the laughing stock of Europe for a week, before everyone forgets they were even there. For the not so fortunate cloggers, it’s off to the EL, where they may progress to meet their vanquishers at a later date and get their sweet, sweet revenge (they won’t). HJK – Vikingur 3-1 (5-2) Valletta – Kukesi 1-1 (1-1) APOEL Nicosia – Suduva 1-0 (2-3) Hapoel Beer Sheva – Flora Tallinn 3-1 (7-2) Malmoe FF – Drita 2-0 (5-0) TNS – KF Shkendija 4-0 (4-5) Vidi FC – F91 Dudelange 2-1 (3-2) FK Crvena Zvezda – FK Spartaks 2-0 (2-0) Crusaders – Ludogorets Razgrad 0-2 (0-9) Legia Warszawa – Cork City 3-0 (4-0) Sheriff - Torpedo 3-0 (4-2) Qarabag - Olimpija Ljubjana 0-0 (1-0) Zrjinski - Spartak Trnava 1-1 (1-2) Rosenborg - Valur 3-1 (3-2) Sutjeska - Astana 0-2 (0-3) Celtic - Alashkert 3-0 (6-0) ======================================== ======================================== ======================================== Day 2 is now behind us. I did not watch any of these games, but I’m sure they were every bit as exhilarating as I’ve become accustomed to in these (very) early qualification stages. I hope you enjoyed the nail biting finishes and the spectacular world class goals, truly worthy of the spectacle that is the UEFA Champions League, sponsored by corrupt petrol and blood money. And Pepsi. Sheriff, Qarabag, Spartak, Rosenborg, Astana and Celtic join the other And now, ladyboys and gentlemen, the moment you have all been waiting for, here is the draw for Qualifying Round 2. Whoa there, not so fast Billy. You need some background information first. Once again, the qualifiers will be spread over two days, Tuesday and Wednesday. The first leg will be played July 24 and July 25. The return legs will be played on July 31 and August 1, respectively. Round 2 is where we separate the dross, and most likely Legia Warsaw from the teams that actually do have a modicum of chance of reaching the CL group stage (though let’s be honest – it’s still not very likely). The lucky few that make it to Round 3 will have a much easier chance of making it in the Europa, though. In this round, our misguided heroes from round 1 are joined by teams that have plenty of European experience but have the bad luck of playing in otherwise poo poo leagues, which is why UEFA has deemed it necessary to punish them with an additional qualification stage. Because BATE and Dinamo are oh so obviously inferior to the likes of Inter. If you’re wondering what the gently caress is going on – fret not, we all are, but let me try to explain. In this round, the previous winners are joined by four championship winning teams from higher ranked associations (BATE, Dinamo, Cluj and loving Midtjylland for some reason) and by four runner-up teams, again, from higher ranked associations, but still not good enough to play with the truly worthy (Ajax, yes, Ajax, Basel, yes, that’s right, Basel, PAOK and Sturm Graz). Anyway, enough of this poo poo, here is the draw: If they ain't bold, they ain't seeded. Not that it matters that much at this stage. Champions path (as in these teams are actual Champions and deserve to be here): Astana - Midtjylland I don’t know much about FC Midtjylland other than they’re the Danish champions, and I’m too lazy to read Wikipedia to find out more, but it’s safe to assume they haven’t achieved anything of note. The Danish league seems to be good enough for UEFA to grant them a direct entry to Qualification Round 2, so that has to count for something (  ). I remember them from the 2015/16 Europa League when they both won and then lost to none other than Legia Warsaw in the EL group stage and then went out to Manchester United in the first knock out round. They should cruise past Astana, unless they get eaten by goats somewhere on the Kazakh steppes.Ludogorets - VideotonLudogorets annihilated Crusaders in the previous round, but that was hardly a surprise. Videoton scraped through past Dudelange. Seeing how no one ever watches these teams play, it’s hard to say who the favourite is. Ludogorets has the better track record. Kukesi - QarabagKukesi somehow managed to squeeze past Valletta (really says a lot about Valletta) on away goals. Qarabag didn’t really impress either, only managing a solitary goal across two legs with Olimpija. Alas, that was enough, and these two utterly hopeless clowns get to amuse us in Round 2. Amazingly enough, one of them will be around for Round 3, too. loving UEFA. CFR Cluj  - MalmoeCFR are yet another Eastern European rags to riches almost back to rags story. From languishing in the lower Romanian leagues, to being bought by an oligarch and suddenly winning domestic titles and almost winning the Intertoto Cup. Well, not really, they were like joint runners-up or some other crazy UEFA poo poo like that. Remember the Intertoto Cup? No one does, but I bet the Feroviarii supporters do. Anyway, they regularly qualified for the CL and did well in the EL, and then almost went broke. Fortunately, they got some money from another rich guy and now they’re back. In Round 2 qualifying form. The funniest thing about all this is that the Romanian league has a higher coefficient than Sweden, yet Malmoe are somehow seeded in this pairing. Malmoe did ok in the first round by beating up on hapless Kosovars, but unless the ghost of Zlatan infuses them with unlimited power, CFR should choo choo right the gently caress over them. Dinamo Zagreb  - Hapoel Beer-ShevaDinamo Zagreb are a Hrvatska institution. And after the World Cup we are all Hrvatska, and our srce gori jer te voli, moja ljubavi. Since the formation of the Croatian league following the break up of Yugoslavia, they have won the league 19 times. Some of the best players in the world have played there in their youth. Their most recent alumni include Mandzukić, Modrić and Kovacić, need I say more? They have been CL regulars, though their most recent run has been an unmitigated disaster. Now UEFA has decided that Croatia are lowborn Slavs after all and must fight their way through the rest of this ramshackle disheveled plebs. Not that fighting for their lives is an alien concept. Hapoel predictably easily dispatched their 1st round opposition. Dinamo is a whole different level though. It's a tough shekel. Crvena Zvezda - SūduvaRed Star managed to scrape past Spartaks but were by no means convincing. Suduva provided the upset of the round by eliminating APOEL Nicosia. Normally, I’d expect the crveno-beli to go through without breaking sweat, but Suduva could be the surprise of this exciting match up. Sadly, no one will watch it to find out. BATE Borisov  - HJKBATE Borisov are a strong and proud team. Just like Belorussia, and just like Lukashenko rules their country, they rule their league with an iron fist. They have managed a regular presence in the CL, which is why UEFA is doing their best to keep them, and other teams from “that part” of Europe out. HJK muddled through the first round. I can't imagine an upset, but then weirder things have happened. Shkëndija - SheriffShkendija first stunned The New Saints 5-0 at home and then hilarity ensued as they almost collapsed away. Finally going through by a single goal. Definitely the highlight of the previous round for these jokesters. Sheriff predictably sank the Georgian Torpedo and I expect them to do the same in this round. Legia Warszawa - Spartak TrnavaI have nothing to say on these two. A couple years ago under Saint Stanislav Cherchesov, Legia would have steamrolled this tie with one hand behind their backs. We’re so bad now, I fully expect this to be the beginning of the end, not only as far as Legia’s European adventure is concerned, but for the entire season. While fans are always prone to drama, I poo poo you not. We won the title with 11 losses. Let that sink in. Celtic - RosenborgEver since the Scottish league became a one-horse race, it has been slipping in UEFA rankings. This is why Celtic are here. Whether anyone likes these twats or not, I think we can all agree that starting out in the very first qualifying round was a joke. They tore Alashkert a new one, even while being one man down. Rosenborg barely got through Valur. The immortal Lord Bendtner scoring two penalties to put them over, with the latter coming in the dying minutes of the game. This is probably the most interesting game of the Champions route. As much as I despise Celtic, I think they will be the better of the two. League path (as in these teams are fail shitstain turds that haven't won the title but have enough pull with UEFA to be here): PAOK  - Basel Panthessalonikios Athlikos Omilos Konstantinopoliton, or PAOK as they’re affectionately known, hail from the Greek city of – you guessed it, you wonderful person you – Thessaloniki. Unlike PAOK, who are perennial also-runs, Thessaloniki is a gorgeous, picturesque city in northern Greece. You can’t call yourself a true European if you’ve never been there. Seriously, go there. It’s loving awesome. Unlike Thessaloniki, PAOK are neither gorgeous, nor picturesque, nor particularly good for that matter. They’ve only won their domestic title a couple of times like 30 years ago, and rarely progress beyond European group stages. Yet somehow, they’re in the Champions League. Hopefully not for long. They do have some cool fans though, so while we probably won’t see any fireworks on field, we might see something burn elsewhere. Everyone knows FC Basel, I don’t really think there’s much to be said of them. They are a model mid-level club with a long and distinguished history. Financially responsible and consistent on the field throughout. They are a regular presence in Europe and have had several decent runs over the years. With 20 domestic titles and a firm, dominant grip over the Swiss league in recent years, they surprised most of us by yielding to the Young Boys in 2017/18, which is why they are now here, with the rest of these failures. Ajax  - Sturm Graz Hoo boy. Where do I start. Ajax used to be cool, and good. Half of Europe’s best players used to come from their youth and senior teams. They used to win the Eredivisie all the time. Like 33 times. They used to win the European Cup. They used to be very competitive in the Champions League too. They even won it once. See a pattern? Ajax are a bunch of has-beens, who unlike the Farcelonas, Badrids, Pooshiteds and the rest of those perennially insufferable cunts, missed the Champions League money boat to football Valhalla and now they’re stuck here, with these other monumental gently caress ups. They can’t even win their ever more insignificant league, with PSV putting them firmly in their place. They are so loving bad that even Milik didn’t want to hang around and moved to Italy. loving Arek Milik everybody. Sturm Graz are Austrian, and they sound like a team that Adolf would like. I know very little of Sturm. They only won their league a few times and barely ever register on the European radar. The only memory I have of them is their winning the joke Intertoto Cup back in 2008, alongside ten other teams and then failing in the UEFA Cup, because if you failed to qualify directly, what on Earth makes you think that winning an Intertoto Cup would change how bad you truly are. Frankly, I have no idea what they’re doing here. Even an emasculated Ajax should make quick work of these jokers. ============= Well, well, well, what do you know. The first leg of QR2 is now behind us. Was it as exciting as we all hoped? Yes. No. Kind of. We had some predictable results, some unexpected upsets and some mind numbing, boring games. Had they been played in Soviet Union, all participants would have been shot and then deported to Siberia and shot again. Here are the results: FC Astana – FC Midtjylland 2-1 This is a bit of a surprise. While playing on an artificial turf in the bumfuck nowhere capital of the world is always tricky, you’d expect the Danes to come away with a draw, at least. I still think they will go through, especially with that all important away goal. Ludogorets – Videoton 0-0 Another interesting result. I predicted Ludogorets to make a strong push, given a lackluster opposing team, yet they couldn’t do it. This could go either way now. Kukesi – Qarabag 0-0 gently caress both these teams. Neither should be in this round, let alone in QR3. This is a loving travesty. I couldn’t give a poo poo who wins. Cluj – Malmoe 0-1 Cluj making GBS threads the bed at home to Malmoe could be seen a surprising, but it isn’t. Dinamo Zagreb – Hapoel Beer Sheva 5-0 Oy vey, this is done and dusted. Return leg should be a formality. I expected more from Hapoel tbh. Not that there was any doubt who would be the eventual winner, but 5-0 is quite embarrassing. Crvena Zvezda – Suduva 3-0 No surprise here either. Red Star are by far and away the better team. BATE – HJK 0-0 Candidate for upset of this round. BATE were nailed on favourites to run away with this tie. I’m very surprised they were held scoreless at home. I still think they might muddle through this in the end, but this is definitely the one to watch. Shkendija – Sheriff 1-0 Well, this is a bit of a conundrum. Sherirff was my favourite to win this, I guess this shows what I know. Still very much an open tie with either of these two poised to go through. Legia – Spartak 0-2 Called it. We’re poo poo. Could’ve ended 0-5 if Spartak had any good forwards who could actually shoot straight. Spartak will poo poo all over Legia in the return leg and it’s off to the steppes of Europa League for these lazy fucks. I hope they get lost there and die, along with the entire management. Celtic – Rosenborg 3-1 Rosenborg fans saw this coming from miles away. They did get that away goal though, and Celtic are known to poo poo the bed playing away in Europe. While I would err on the side of Celtic going through, we’re all going to be rooting for Rosenborg next week, because gently caress Celtic forever. PAOK – Basel 2-1 The other candidate for upset of this round. How does a team this mediocre get one over such a consistent, well-oiled machine, I do not know. We need Swiss input, preferably in essay form. “What the gently caress happened to Basel” in 1000 words or less. Basel are by no means out of the running though, and have that magical away goal to their credit. Ajax – Sturm 2-0 Predictable all the way. Boring Ajax with a boring win against a boring team in a boring game. Actually, I didn’t even watch the highlights. Maybe it was good, maybe it wasn’t. The point is – nobody gives a gently caress. So, while nothing has been decided yet and anything can still happen, I think we can safely assume Dinamo, Red Star, Ajax and Spartak are through. I’m tempted to call the Celtic tie, but there’s still a sliver of hope they will embarrass themselves. Everything else is still very much in play and should make for an exciting return leg. Mark it down – this is the last leg that will feature interesting teams you have never heard of. Starting with QR3 it’s back to the same old poo poo. gently caress you. mackintosh fucked around with this message at 12:11 on Jul 26, 2018 |
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Jul 17, 2018 16:16
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good op op. i hope valur dont manage to iceland us completely, but following rosenborg in europe hasnt been much fun in a while (except when we eliminated ajax last year, that was a good time)
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Jul 17, 2018 17:24
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lmao that belge clubs are less fail in europe than legia
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Jul 17, 2018 17:27
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The coefficient is a farce. Legia is one thing, but Celtic, come on, they are bad and fail but not that bad and fail.
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Jul 17, 2018 17:43
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Good op, OP, according to these advanced stats, Kukesi, Celtic, Legia Warsaw, and Valetta are all at approximately the same level of fail and bad, which I find reasonably amusing
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Jul 17, 2018 18:26
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I would like to see the Estonian teams make a better account for themselves but don't think it's likely. That's my take. Also gently caress Legia Warsaw
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Jul 17, 2018 18:27
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Not very likely, Hapoel are up 6-1 on aggregate at the moment.
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Jul 17, 2018 18:41
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good things about the new format: Serie A gets four teams in the group stage, as it should be bad things about the new format: everything else, including no longer supporting the coefficient so that England wouldn't get the fourth spot, less teams from smaller countries in the group stage, and like you said seeing how teams like Red Star, Legia Warsaw, Rosenborg, and Celtic have been left behind by the satellite TV age and clubs like Manchester United pulling in beaucoup bucks by having an Official Mattress and Pillow Partner, Official Paint Partner, Official Financial Services Affinity Partner for Malaysia, The Philippines, and Singapore, and a sleeve sponsor that is best known for making toilets. e: you wanna know how the mighty have fallen? the champions of the Dutch league no longer get an automatic bid into the group stage, their league has become that bad.
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Jul 17, 2018 20:00
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Troy Queef posted:good things about the new format: Serie A gets four teams in the group stage, as it should be Context for those who aren't familiar with advanced UEFA Coefficient Stats: Portugal, Blegum, Ukraine and the Czech Republic all get a team in the group stage, and Russia gets two. The bar isn't exactly high
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Jul 17, 2018 20:07
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Milan played Shkendija in the qualifiers of the EL last year. They are Albanians masquerading as Macedonians and they love Milan so it was good.
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Jul 17, 2018 20:25
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One day in, and we already have an upset. Sort of. APOEL Nicosia are out.
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Jul 17, 2018 21:03
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apoeling
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Jul 17, 2018 21:08
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mackintosh posted:One day in, and we already have an upset. Sort of. APOEL Nicosia are out. rip cypriotic football
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Jul 17, 2018 21:13
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legia have cemented their place in the next round as well as ludogrets. they will both be playing some slovakian minnows or a team from macedonia
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Jul 17, 2018 21:40
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We still have at least 5 minutes to throw it away.
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Jul 17, 2018 21:44
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Ok, 3-0, now we're through.
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Jul 17, 2018 21:45
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mackintosh posted:Ok, 3-0, now we're through. these qualifiers have shown me a lot about the hierarchy of european football and leave me wondering how there are teams in estonia with a 13:80 goal split in 20 games
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Jul 17, 2018 21:57
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Most of these countries have barely enough people to organise a league. It's no surprise some teams in those leagues are of questionable pedigree. OP updated with tonight's results.
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Jul 17, 2018 22:23
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It's absolutely revolting how the top four get four garanteed teams in the CL, includding whatever poo poo cloggers end up in 4th on Italy or france, but the rest of the world has to suck a thousand dicks to get in.
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Jul 17, 2018 22:37
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Mans posted:It's absolutely revolting how the top four get four garanteed teams in the CL, includding whatever poo poo cloggers end up in 4th on Italy or france, but the rest of the world has to suck a thousand dicks to get in. They all seem big time dirt farmers tho
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Jul 17, 2018 23:03
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Mans posted:It's absolutely revolting how the top four get four garanteed teams in the CL, includding whatever poo poo cloggers end up in 4th on Italy or france, but the rest of the world has to suck a thousand dicks to get in. I agree, Inter is insanely poo poo.
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Jul 17, 2018 23:55
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I'm serious btw.
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Jul 17, 2018 23:55
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Ronald is going to score so many goals this season both in the Serie A and the Champions League.
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Jul 18, 2018 00:16
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Gigi Galli posted:I agree, Inter is insanely poo poo. WANDA
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Jul 18, 2018 00:21
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Shrapnig posted:Ronald is going to score so many goals this season both in the Serie A and the Champions League. He's going to break fatty gonz's record with 4 games to spare. Troy Queef posted:WANDA lol
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Jul 18, 2018 02:14
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i'm insanely hyped for the best match of the qualifiers, the epic battle of britiain between ABERDEEN and BURNLEY
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Jul 18, 2018 07:54
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No upsets so far, Sheriff predictably sank Torpedo, Spartak Trnava and Qarabag both through. Celtic already one up, so is Astana. mackintosh fucked around with this message at 20:03 on Jul 18, 2018 |
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Jul 18, 2018 19:56
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Celtic somehow manage to get a man sent off and then get a penalty awarded to them and are 2-0 up (5-0 on aggregate). Further proof that this round is an epic joke. gently caress UEFA.
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Jul 18, 2018 20:06
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mackintosh posted:Rosenborg scored, Lord Bendtner converted a penalty. What a day. theres still time to gently caress this up
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Jul 18, 2018 20:08
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rear end cobra posted:theres still time to gently caress this up True. Valur only need to score one. Well... poo poo. And Lord Bendtner does it again. What a game lol. mackintosh fucked around with this message at 20:36 on Jul 18, 2018 |
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Jul 18, 2018 20:15
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football is some dumb poo poo
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Jul 18, 2018 20:36
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lol lord bendtner scores his second penalty of the night, 3-1 rosenborg lets hope this is it now
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Jul 18, 2018 20:37
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Rosenborg through. No upsets today, then. Unless Celtic somehow concede 6. Honestly, it would've been embarrassing to go out to Valur.
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Jul 18, 2018 20:39
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mackintosh posted:Rosenborg through. No upsets today, then. Unless Celtic somehow concede 6. Honestly, it would've been embarrassing to go out to Valur. getting pretty used to embarrassment but this would probably have been the worst one in a very good while we're a small fish even in the wasteman pond now and will be dispatched by celtic in the next round anyway
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Jul 18, 2018 20:43
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Celtic are through, what a surprise. Updated op with round 2 draw.
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Jul 18, 2018 21:49
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rear end cobra posted:getting pretty used to embarrassment but this would probably have been the worst one in a very good while you realize that Celtic are notoriously bad away from home in Europe like they almost gave away a 3 goal aggregate lead a couple years ago
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Jul 18, 2018 21:49
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Indeed. They even lost to us, but then went through on a technicality.
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Jul 18, 2018 21:52
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great op btw to do away with all the spite, is there any chance of there being an EL qualifiers thread
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Jul 18, 2018 22:08
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Troy Queef posted:you realize that Celtic are notoriously bad away from home in Europe yeah but they still won 1-0 aggregate over rosenborg last year after a goalless draw in glasgow and winning the game in trondheim
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Jul 18, 2018 22:31
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Truly good op but i didnt understand any of it because what the axtual gently caress. Im looking forwars to maybe seeing some goals frome some matches on TVs playing CL coverage at the electronics store. Then when the garbagemen of europe have cleaned our most of the waste we can see some Real Hollywood Football. And the CL anthem rules.
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Jul 18, 2018 23:03
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