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I got a Donald Trump corkscrew, where the corkscrew is his penis. It was a gag gift, so it's intentionally lovely.
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Dec 25, 2018 21:24
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Son of Rodney posted:I got a dyson portable vacuum. You hold it in your hands and dont have a little lovely vacuum you drag around anymore, that gets stuck everywhere and annoys the poo poo out of you. I'm seriously exited to try it at home. if it's one of those ones that without the attachments on kinda looks like a sci-fi space gun then it's a life changer and one of my most prized possessions and you are very lucky
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Dec 25, 2018 21:24
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I got a toenail clipper.
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Dec 25, 2018 21:31
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Phthisis posted:if it's one of those ones that without the attachments on kinda looks like a sci-fi space gun then it's a life changer and one of my most prized possessions and you are very lucky That's exactly what it is and as a 32 year old man it's one of the best gifts I've gotten in years.
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Dec 25, 2018 21:35
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Son of Rodney posted:I got a dyson portable vacuum. You hold it in your hands and dont have a little lovely vacuum you drag around anymore, that gets stuck everywhere and annoys the poo poo out of you. I'm seriously exited to try it at home. sir this thread is for lovely gifts only
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Dec 25, 2018 22:05
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I'm posting as my young-kin character who only likes Lego, don't chrono shame plz.
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Dec 25, 2018 22:15
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I got a shirt. It says "no one likes a soggy bottom" and has a picture of a pie. I hope Mary Berry I proud.
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Dec 25, 2018 22:32
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My mother's bf decided she was due for new toilet seats and got her 3 solid oak toilet seats. Nothing else. I mean, sure they're nice toilet seats but goddamn man.
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Dec 25, 2018 22:34
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This isn't lovely, in fact the opposite, but it's one of the most intriguing gifts I've received. We have several gardens (flower and vegetable). My parents some how found and presented us with a well made pine box, inside are hand forged and constructed, EXTREMELY high end ... garden tools. With like custom wood handles and such. They go so far as to have details like a square, folding latch to hold the garden shears together on the base of the handle, and a bulb planter (think narrow trowel shaped thing, that looks kinda really close to a gladius) with one side sharpened like a knife, with a gut hook at the the base to open bags and such and the other edge serrated and it's roughly the size of a large bowie knife, it has in markings on the 'scooped' part of the blade so you know how deep in inches you're digging for the bulbs (though it's neat because it's just a straight line, not numbered or labeled or overly complex), along with several other tools, all done in blackened steel. Frankly they're so beautiful my wife and I are unsure if we want to use them or just hang them in our garden shed as decoration. We also got a bee house and book about bees. The bee house is meant for carpenter bees to use and you can open the front panel door of it, and there's still a plexiglass barrier so you can see the tunnels the bees use and see what they've been up to but not bother them or get stung. I plan to hang that on the shed itself for sure so they can get to our garden and help us out. Anyway this is my "Not lovely gifts" post for the thread.
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Dec 25, 2018 22:58
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Guildenstern Mother posted:My mother's bf decided she was due for new toilet seats and got her 3 solid oak toilet seats. Nothing else. I mean, sure they're nice toilet seats but goddamn man. Your mom must take some seriously messy shits
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Dec 25, 2018 22:58
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You know I wish there was a way for me to tell people 'please don't buy me presents' that makes them not buy me any presents Every drat year I tell them, you don't need to buy me anything, I'm happy just to hang out and have a nice meal, please don't buy me anything, you don't have to spend more money And every year I still get a dozen boxes of store bought plastic poo poo I don't need, or a metric ton of candy because 'You'd be dissapointed if you didn't have anything to open!' 'I feel too bad if I don't get you something!'
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Dec 25, 2018 23:23
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Light saber bbq tongs. They have a vader handgrip and make the ignition noise when opened. They are also way to long to use comfortably and lock closed again if you squeeze to hard. They are an expensive pain in the rear end to use.
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Dec 25, 2018 23:25
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big dyke energy posted:You know I wish there was a way for me to tell people 'please don't buy me presents' that makes them not buy me any presents Just give them a list of inexpensive books or office supplies or black socks or some other poo poo you actually need, poo poo man take a hint
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Dec 25, 2018 23:32
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Phthisis posted:if it's one of those ones that without the attachments on kinda looks like a sci-fi space gun then it's a life changer and one of my most prized possessions and you are very lucky yes we have two and they're awesome
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Dec 25, 2018 23:41
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i just masturbated my penis
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Dec 25, 2018 23:44
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- hi
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I got a fluorescent yellow snood. I'm kind of into it though.
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Dec 25, 2018 23:47
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an aunt went zero-effort this year and just got every person a seemingly randomly chosen Funko man. So now I unfortunately own one of these things. For some reason I was chosen to get the big blue furry guy from Monsters Inc? So I got a thing that looks stupid and does nothing from a children's movie I've never seen.
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Dec 26, 2018 00:00
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13Pandora13 posted:Just give them a list of inexpensive books or office supplies or black socks or some other poo poo you actually need, poo poo man take a hint Haha. If I ask for socks (you bet your rear end I ask for socks because I know I can't escape gifts, I specifically asked for 'socks or gloves') I don't just get socks, I get horrible fake fleece slipper socks that are completely useless as both socks and slippers and I get them every drat year. It's like it doesn't matter what I actually want, because if it's not suitably Christmassy or whatever I won't get it. Every day socks that I could use and enjoy all year? Not enough of a gift, apparently.
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Dec 26, 2018 00:13
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big dyke energy posted:Haha. If I ask for socks (you bet your rear end I ask for socks because I know I can't escape gifts, I specifically asked for 'socks or gloves') I don't just get socks, I get horrible fake fleece slipper socks that are completely useless as both socks and slippers and I get them every drat year. Eh, go a little pricier then. Doughty escorial wool or Pembrey Sea Island cotton socks. Or some John Henry boot socks if labor work socks are more your need. A black cashmere men's scarf. They aren't going to give up. I've started asking for things like specific limited release stamps and expensive pens because "a pack of G2s and some forever stamps" just gets weird looks/is ignored.
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Dec 26, 2018 00:20
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I got a roomba. I live in a 650 square foot apartment with little floor space and lots of obstacles. But I still love my mom for giving me a robot.
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Dec 26, 2018 01:12
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Also, disappointed there are no wall scrolls or funkpops itt.
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Dec 26, 2018 01:14
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gbs but from 2004 posted:sir this thread is for lovely gifts only In honor of, and in keeping with the theme of this thread, I recieved a copy of Just Cause 3... A game I already have. Probably on discount since Just Cause 4 is already out.
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Dec 26, 2018 01:18
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The Bananana posted:In honor of, and in keeping with the theme of this thread, I recieved a copy of Just Cause 3... Worse, it's in the January humble bundle, and is one of the three games you could get in December early if you subscribe.
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Dec 26, 2018 01:41
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i love you all because you lasted this long.
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Dec 26, 2018 01:43
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I got the bags that you zip up clothes that you are packing in luggage. She explained it’s so you can keep everything organized in the suit case. I was like, this is a problem I didn’t realized I had. My daughter lolled
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Dec 26, 2018 02:37
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Burt Sexual posted:I got the bags that you zip up clothes that you are packing in luggage. She explained it’s so you can keep everything organized in the suit case. I was like, this is a problem I didn’t realized I had. My daughter lolled Sup Burt!
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Dec 26, 2018 03:42
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big dyke energy posted:Haha. If I ask for socks (you bet your rear end I ask for socks because I know I can't escape gifts, I specifically asked for 'socks or gloves') I don't just get socks, I get horrible fake fleece slipper socks that are completely useless as both socks and slippers and I get them every drat year. Just donate them?
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Dec 26, 2018 03:47
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big dyke energy posted:You know I wish there was a way for me to tell people 'please don't buy me presents' that makes them not buy me any presents It took a couple years but this year my family all got only cards for each other, it’s pretty great not having to deal with the tons of BS I don’t actually want or need and not having to stress out about getting something for everyone.
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Dec 26, 2018 03:49
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Twerkdad posted:It took a couple years but this year my family all got only cards for each other, it’s pretty great not having to deal with the tons of BS I don’t actually want or need and not having to stress out about getting something for everyone. My wife and I buy poo poo we need or want for the house. Getting rid of 30 yo track lighting and got some new pans. Boring Salty Josh posted:Sup Burt! Throw back
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Dec 26, 2018 03:54
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For sure man, you get anything lovely?
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Dec 26, 2018 04:24
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Salty Josh posted:For sure man, you get anything lovely? Bags you pack inside of bags is p lovely. What a waste
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Dec 26, 2018 04:26
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Burt Sexual posted:Bags you pack inside of bags is p lovely. What a waste drat dude. My stale cologne don't hold a candle to that.
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Dec 26, 2018 04:30
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Thots and Prayers posted:
showed this post to my actual bilderberger mother in law who said she considered getting us these kits she lost her poo poo and the whole family had a huge laugh thank you merry christmas pal
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Dec 26, 2018 04:33
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My girlfriend
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Salty Josh posted:drat dude. My stale cologne don't hold a candle to that. We all sat around the tree opening gifts. It was p cool and fun. One hour well spent w coffee.
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Dec 26, 2018 04:34
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DisgracelandUSA posted:Also, disappointed there are no wall scrolls or funkpops itt. I brought someone a funkpop for Xmas. He was thrilled. Of course he is also 5, so you know, the target audience.
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Dec 26, 2018 04:45
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Over the summer my friend was going to get one of those planners for teachers that has a bunch of poo poo in it and random inspirational quotes. She was really turned off by one quote that said something like teachers should burn themselves out if they really love their work. We talked poo poo about it for a couple of months. My mom got me the same planner for Christmas. 1. That's a lovely quote 2. Who uses a planner anymore? I do everything on Google Drive and so does everyone else I know 3. It's halfway through the school year.
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Dec 26, 2018 04:57
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Grem posted:Over the summer my friend was going to get one of those planners for teachers that has a bunch of poo poo in it and random inspirational quotes. She was really turned off by one quote that said something like teachers should burn themselves out if they really love their work. We talked poo poo about it for a couple of months. Yeah that’s bad. But my mom has no concept of what I even do for a living. It computers. Lol 20 years. I’m taking her and a friend to a resort for Xmas. Hope she remembers it. She can’t drive, so I’ll get to meet another old lady that probably is cooler than my mom. She always buys presents thoughfor my kids. E my mom is an extreme racist
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Dec 26, 2018 05:08
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big dyke energy posted:Haha. If I ask for socks (you bet your rear end I ask for socks because I know I can't escape gifts, I specifically asked for 'socks or gloves') I don't just get socks, I get horrible fake fleece slipper socks that are completely useless as both socks and slippers and I get them every drat year. Tell your aunt(s) that Aunt Gift Law says they must give you regular socks/underwear for Christmas. It has always been so, back unto the days of the Forefathers.
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Dec 26, 2018 06:34
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Werthers originals because like 5 years ago I took one from my grand parents candy bowl to be polite and they think I love them since.
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Dec 26, 2018 13:30
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Bought my kid an Arrma Granite 2wd RC trick I hope he loses interest in. Dad got us a bugout bag with some survival stuff and emergency food supply. I already have a bugout but didn’t have any food, so I’m gonna use the pack he got us for my motorcycle bag since it has waist and chest buckles
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Dec 26, 2018 14:18
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