• Alexa Bliss opened the show with A Moment of Bliss, this time in the ring instead of on the stage. She spoke about the Money in the Bank ladder matches on the PPV of the same name. The men and women's match would each have 8 participants, divided equally between Raw and Smackdown.
  
• The male competitors from Raw are BRAUN!, Ricochet, Drew McIntyre and Baron Corbin. They argued amongst themselves, Drew warning Corbin he wasn't going to let him steal his victory again like he did in the triple threat last week. BRAUN! told them all to shut up and challenged them to a tag match.
  
• BRAUN! and Ricochet defeated Drew McIntyre and Baron Corbin after the Drew/Baron couldn't stay on the same page, with Drew eventually knocking out Corbin after trying to tag himself in to steal the pin. BRAUN! powerslammed Corbin and Ricochet got the pin.
  
• The Usos defeated The Good Brothers in a match that got a fair amount of time, then aired a cell phone video of Dash Wilder shaving Scott Dawson's back (), and the Revival came out to complain about this invasion of privacy (which is fair!). They promised to take care of Ryder and Hawkins then deal with the Usos later.
  
• The Miz did an episode of MizTV with guest Bobby Lashley (no Lio Rush accompanying him) where he questioned if Lashley had achieved his full potential while calling himself an overachiever. Lashley, talking about himself in the 3rd person, pointed out that Miz lost to Shane at Wrestlemania and reiterated that Miz's dad thought he was worthless. Miz attacked Lashley, obviously intent on proving Lashley wasn't better than him.
  
• Lashley, who apparently is better than him, defeated The Miz in a singles match. Shane McMahon came out during the match and a picture of MizDad appeared on the big screen which proved too much of a distraction. Shane attacked Miz postmatch who started to fight back until Lashley helped Shane out. Shane put him in a submission hold and declared on the mic that he was the Best in the World.
  
• The Viking Raiders defeated Lucha House Party in like 2 minutes.
  
• Another A Moment of Bliss, this time on the stage, introduced the women competitors from Raw for the Money in the Bank ladder match. They were Natte, Dana Brooke, Naomi and Alexa Bliss herself. They argued and Naomi demanded a match against Alexa, who initially insisted she didn't have her gear.
  
• A new episode of Firefly Fun House aired, with Bray doing a painting which he showed to a rat puppet, it was the burning barn that Randy Orton set on fire. Abby the Witch showed up and Bray informed us that she is a sociopath, and spelling it out as the Word of the Day.
  
• Naomi defeated Alexa Bliss in a match largely abut Alexa's shoes, which she claimed weren't actually hers.
  
• Rey Mysterio and his large son were interviewed backstage, where Rey agreed it was tough being a little man in a land of giants, and he felt he'd let everybody down with his quick defeat at Wrestlemania. He would prove himself tonight against Samoa Joe in a rematch.
  
• Becky Lynch was interviewed in the ring and insisted that fighting two matches in one night was a choice she did not regret making, because she intended to defend the belts she had earned in the same way she earned them, by fighting. Lacey Evans came out to largely repeat her regular schtick and then they broke into a brawl, frequently breaking free of restraining officials to fight more. The crowd loved Becky.
  
• A Make A Wish child got to meet Stephanie McMahon (by request) as well as going around backstage and meeting other wrestlers, including Kofi Kingston.
  
• Ryder and Hawkins, with new theme music, defeated The Revival in a non-title match in less than 5 minutes. This was most notable for a "shave your back" chant directed at The Revival.
  
• The Miz informed an interviewer backstage that he was challenging Shane McMahon to a steel cage match. gently caress.
  
• Sami Zayn did a promo discussing other fun stuff he did on "vacation", including studying psychology where he discovered the concept of psychological entitlement. He accused the fans of being entitled and throwing temper tantrums when they didn't get their way, and told a story about a little kid whose father encouraged him to ask Sami for an autograph at 4am. He agreed that quitting WWE would make him happy, but not as happy as he is to show up every week and hold the fans accountable for being terrible people. He intended to take the power "back" from the people.
  
• Shane has accepted Miz's steel cage match challenge. gently caress.
  
• Samoa Joe did a promo mocking Rey Mysterio, suggesting he buy Dominic a mask so he could hide his shame for his father. Mysterio defeated Joe in a non-title match with a not particularly good looking cradle pin, and celebrated with Dominic after the match.
  
• AJ Styles and Seth Rollins came to the ring for a contract signing, where they passive-aggressively sniped back-handed compliments at each other. AJ talked up Seth giving it his all but noted he may have burned himself out, especially now he didn't have Roman or Dean to watch his back. As good as he was, he would never be the Phenomenal AJ Styles. For his part, Seth reminded AJ he never wanted to be the next anybody, just the first Seth Rollins. He was the man who beat The Beast, he could beat AJ too.
  
• Finally a brawl broke out, with Seth getting the initial upper hand before AJ hit a Phenomenal Forearm to put Seth through the table to end the show.
  

• Michael Cole opened the show, welcoming WWE Champion Kofi Kingston to the ring to celebrate his victory at Wrestlemania but also address Kevin Owens attacking him last week. Kofi agreed that he'd been blindsided by Owens, saying he really believed Owens had changed. He didn't mind having a target on his back though and wasn't scared of Owens, and challenged him to a match at Money in the Bank with Kofi's title on the line.
  
• Owens came out and admitted Kofi winning at Mania was a great moment, but the fans didn't truly believe he was championship material and Kofi shouldn't believe it either. He accepted the challenge, but then was jumped from behind by Xavier Woods. They fought, and Kofi joined in attacking Owens who bailed.
  
• Bayley is one of the Smackdown competitors in the Women's Money in the Bank Ladder match.
  
• Becky defeated Bayley in a good match, with Bayley getting in a lot of offense and even hitting her Elbow Drop, only for Becky to grab her into the Disarmer to get the submission win. Despite Becky no-selling Bayley's finish, Bayley looked good and the crowd was into her.
  
• Don't worry though, just in case there was any mistaking Bayley as anything but a loser, Charlotte Flair made sure to arrive and hit Becky with a big boot, then toss Bayley into the ringpost and out of the ring like a sack of garbage.
  
• Aleister Black did a backstage promo in the dark talking about fear, and how it paralyzes his opponents.
  
• The Hardy Boyz came to the ring to address Jeff's injury, with Jeff on crutches. They showed a video of white supremacist Lars Sullivan attacking various wrestlers including Jeff. Matt said they no choice but to surrender the tag team titles since Jeff couldn't wrestle. Jeff assured the fans this wasn't the end of him or the Hardyz as a tag team, and promised to come back better than ever.
  
• White Supremacist Lars Sullivan showed up and beat up Matt Hardy, then came after Jeff. Matt returned to save Jeff, but got smashed by Lars again. R-Truth showed up and attacked Lars with a chair, but Lars beat him up too.
  
• It was announced that Finn Balor, Ali, Andrade and Randy Orton will be the Smackdown competitors in the Men's Money in the Bank ladder match.
  
• The IIconics were guest commentators on a Asuka/Kairi tag match against a couple of giants, including one woman who I think was like 9 foot tall. Asuka/Kairi won quickly, much to their manager Paige's delight, while the IIconics freaked out about the Insane Elbow.
  
• Mandy Rose spoke with Sonya Deville about the Money in the Bank ladder match, as apparently only one of them would be allowed to compete. Rather than be a source of drama, Sonya told Mandy she wanted her to take the spot because she deserved it.
  
• Roman Reigns came out to talk about how he didn't show up to Smackdown intending to punch Vince McMahon, but he was gonna punch somebody and Vince just happened to be in the way. Shane came out to remind him that the McMahon Family owns this land, but Roman pointed out that it was Shane's daddy who owned the land, and when he got into the ring with Roman he got left on his back.
  
• Shane retorted that when HE was in the ring with Roman, Roman ended up on his back. Roman pointed out this was due to Elias, and invited Shane to come face him one-on-one right now. Shane refused, he was busy getting ready for his Steel Cage match with Miz (gently caress) so instead sent out B Team to deal with Roman, and announced Elias would be the second referee at ringside.
  
• Roman eventually beat The B Team, despite Elias hauling the referee out of the ring during a pinfall attempt and trying to attack him with the guitar. Roman Superman Punched Elias, Speared Curtis Axel and got the win. Crowd was really into this by the end of the match.
  
• They repeated the Firefly Funhouse from Raw, where Bray painted a burning barn.
  
• Finn Balor and Ali defeated Randy Orton and Andrade, with Ali scoring the pinfall on Andrade. Orton hit Balor with the RKO immediately after the match but got superkicked by Ali who then climbed the turnbuckle and pointed to the MITB briefcase hanging over the ring.
  
• Ember Moon and Carmella were revealed as the next Smackdown competitors in the Women's Money in the Bank Ladder match. The interviewer was atrociously bad, struggling to read her lines.
  
• Kevin Owens did The Kevin Owens Show as the main event of the evening, again stressing that Kofi was in over his head and Owens would relieve him of that stress by taking the WWE Championship away from him. He called down Xavier Woods to be his guest, but Xavier did not arrive. Owens said he had a backup plan and pulled an Xavier Woods action figure out of his pocket, then a BIG E figure (with a taped up leg) and placed them on a chair, then kicked the chair over.
  
• Kofi arrived sans music and pulled off his shirt, then raced down to the ring and began brawling with Owens (this finally woke up the crowd, who had been dead). Owens tried to bail but Kofi cut him off, leaping from the steel steps to take him out at ringside. He threw a chair onto Owens, beat him against the barricade and talked poo poo to him.
  
• Owens took off through the crowd and Kofi got back into the ring and up onto the turnbuckle, demanding he come back and fight.
  

Jerusalem fucked around with this message at 03:00 on May 1, 2019