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Do Not Fear Jazz
Feb 1, 2005

EMBRACE IT




What is Politics & War?

Politics & War is a free to play browser based political simulator in the same vein as CyberNations. Launched in 2014 it allows you to create a country and govern it as you see fit. You can interact with other players in very simple, awkwardly designed interfaces to trade or even to engage in war. There is a robust, player driven political metagame that fuels the various global conflicts between alliances of nations and blocs of alliances.

The creator & admin of the game actively adds new projects, rewards, and other interfaces to the game to avoid the hilariously slow decline that CyberNations had (has?).

There's even an app so you can check your spreadsheet nation on the go:

Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/...andwar&hl=en_US
iOS: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/politics-war/id1247351838

Okay, so why should I play, and what does GOONS offer me? What can you do in this game?
  • Communism: It just works. GOONS will provide you with any and all resources you need to be competitive at your level.
  • Bashing Fash and Other Assorted Nasties: Naturally, this game has drawn its fair share of Nazis, CHUDs, and pedos seeking to fulfill their lovely fantasies. The primary mission of GOONS is to kick over all of their sand castles and send them crying to their mommies. Come do your part.
  • Market Tracking and Automation: GOONS has its own tools, made by goons, for goons, for tracking market trends, resource amounts of alliance members, wars we're involved in, and much, much more! These tools offer a greatly streamlined game experience where all the boring stuff is taken care of for you, leaving you free to kick the stuffing out of Nazis.
  • Cookie Clicker Baseball: With the right setup, you can make millions of dongs in minutes without even paying attention. GOONS has the right setup. Just log in, turn on the TV, click a few hundred times, and get rich.
  • Pubbie Tears: The GOONS alliance is two months old. In that time, we have skyrocketed past alliances that have been around for years to #15 on the global leaderboard. The rise has been nothing short of meteoric and shows no signs of stopping, and the veterans are not at all happy about it. Help us embarrass them and drink of their sorrow. There's plenty to go around.

Alright, I'll play, now what?

Use one of the referral links below:

https://politicsandwar.com/register/ref=Comrade+Marx
https://politicsandwar.com/register/ref=Sardonic
https://politicsandwar.com/register/ref=ComradeMilton
https://politicsandwar.com/register/ref=JT+Jag


Registering and creating your nation is very easy. If you can't figure it out then ask in the thread. For those of you smart people who can, remember these things when signing up:
    [s]
  • GET ON DISCORD! Most of what you need to know will be explained there.
  • Currency should be bus tokens or dongs, I shouldn’t have to explain this joke anymore.
  • Select South America for your location!! . Go hog wild.

I am now the God Emperor Hosef Byden of the Communist States of America. What next?

Well you join GOONS, of course! You need to apply ingame here: https://politicsandwar.com//alliance/id=5968 and join our discord here: https://discord.gg/tDaeUqz All that's required is a link to your Something Awful forum account and the ability to fill out a short form with information we need.

I hope you found this OP useful in determining whether or not you want to play this game, and that it helped you get involved easier if you have. Veteran players of this game will be around in this thread to answer any questions you have and to provide help should you need it. While this game can seem overwhelming at first, I assure you that it is in fact very simple and easy to play. I will be keeping this thread updated and will gladly answer any questions you may have.

The next post will be about setting up your nation so that you can Almost Instantly! begin spreading grief to the masses while obliterating pixels.

Link Compendium:

DISCORD JOIN THE DISCORD! It has links to everything you need. Participating in the Discord at least semi-regularly is MANDATORY!

WIKI All the beginners' guides are here to help you get started easily.




Do Not Fear Jazz fucked around with this message at 01:08 on Jan 13, 2020

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Comrade Milton
Jul 16, 2005


Seriously. This takes so little effort and the pubbies can be so hilarious. I can't believe I was able to live before Politics and War.

Do Not Fear Jazz
Feb 1, 2005

EMBRACE IT


If you ever played CyberNations and never got to nuke Sardonic, this may be your last chance!



(hint: his nation link is in the OP if you want to nuke him)

So to make this as easy as possible, we’ve made a step by step guide on how to make your last pixel nation.

Register for the game following one of the links in the OP
Join the discord https://discord.gg/u9m8aDG

Once you’ve registered, God Emperor, you’ll need to go through a few prompts, deciding on things like policy issues, national flag, motto, & map location:



Once this is done, and you’ve applied to GOONS ingame, we’ll get you masked on discord and funded up instantly so that you can begin raiding and pirating your way down the coast of Mt. Dickburn right now.

Do Not Fear Jazz fucked around with this message at 02:56 on Nov 1, 2019

Sardonik
Jul 1, 2005



OP is burying the lede a bit, PnW is considerably better than CN in the following ways:

-A war system that is significantly better than Cybernations' objectively terrible system
-NO TECH DEALING OR CONCEPT OF TECH AT ALL
-Better raiding, and the ability to raid 5 nations at once
-No arbitrary limits on foreign aid
-Significantly more nation customization
-'Interesting' policy options:
-No stupid event choices
-Make your nation's borders a wang
-Mobile App on Android and iOS
-A useful API

Also don't nuke Sardonic, thanks.

jumba
Sep 6, 2004

Hang in there!


Ready to get my rear end kicked by sim baseball.

Bocephus
Apr 13, 2003

It's good to be the king...

Mescalero has risen from its ashes. Thanks for the email ping Sard and Dnfj for the write up.

Dilber
Mar 27, 2007

TFLC
(Trophy Feline Lifting Crew)


I'm not sure if Nation simulators are my thing.

Good Dumplings
Mar 29, 2011

Excuse my worthless shitposting because all I can ever hope to accomplish in life is to rot away the braincells of strangers on the internet with my irredeemable retardation.


Do Not Fear Jazz posted:

Currency should be bus tokens or dongs, I shouldn’t have to explain this joke anymore.

gently caress this game

Do Not Fear Jazz
Feb 1, 2005

EMBRACE IT


Dilber posted:

I'm not sure if Nation simulators are my thing.

I don't think you would be good at them anyways.

jumba
Sep 6, 2004

Hang in there!


Apparently you can get embargoed if your baseball team is terrible:

LiberalExtinction
Aug 4, 2009



Have you made anyone eat dog food yet?

Ruzihm
Aug 11, 2010

Group up and push mid, proletariat!





getting in on this

Hihohe
Oct 4, 2008

Fuck you and the sun you live under



Gonna try this out

HallelujahLee
May 3, 2009


A buttehouse revival.

Sardonik
Jul 1, 2005





Just two weeks in, I'm almost in the top 25% of nations.

It is insanely profitable to raid in the beginning.

Do Not Fear Jazz
Feb 1, 2005

EMBRACE IT


This game is actually a communist paradise, make your utopia today and help fund the Greater GOONland Co-Prosperity Sphere.



Hajj Podge posted:

Have you made anyone eat dog food yet?

I have reserved this honor specifically for Methrage.

neogeo0823
Jul 4, 2007

NO THAT'S NOT ME!!


Is this the reason I got an email asking if I was interested in returning for CNGoons stuff? I gather this game's got the same "15 minutes a day" kinda thing going on as CN did, so that might get me back into this kinda stuff, at least for a bit. What's a typical day in the game gonna look like for a newbie that recently signed up?

Do Not Fear Jazz
Feb 1, 2005

EMBRACE IT


neogeo0823 posted:

Is this the reason I got an email asking if I was interested in returning for CNGoons stuff? I gather this game's got the same "15 minutes a day" kinda thing going on as CN did, so that might get me back into this kinda stuff, at least for a bit. What's a typical day in the game gonna look like for a newbie that recently signed up?

Yes.

You login, look at your revenue screen to make sure everything is running well, if you are raiding you check your wars, log out.

Hanging out in discord with former cngoons is the majority of the game.

LiberalExtinction
Aug 4, 2009



Looking forward to nuking people in raids at some point soon.

Aesculus
Mar 22, 2013



DO NOT PLAY THIS GAME

Aesculus fucked around with this message at 05:01 on Feb 8, 2020

Do Not Fear Jazz
Feb 1, 2005

EMBRACE IT


Aesculus posted:

If you want to have fun and continue having fun in this game never build above 10 cities/1k NS. Only developed alliances live there and they don't even PM you saying that it's WORLD WAR THREE because you raided them.

Also Is CN dead yet?

Yeah I'm funding most goons up to around 8 cities 1k so they can raid aggressively. Come play aes, or at least hang out on discord with us.


Unfortunately not.

LiberalExtinction
Aug 4, 2009



We're already loving with the market prices of resources and making pubbies mad about it.

HallelujahLee
May 3, 2009


This isn't a game so much as hanging about in discord annoying pubs. The game is more of an after-thought, though alot better than CN.

LiberalExtinction
Aug 4, 2009





In two days I've looted $10m from idiot pubbies and spent half of it on a pointless baseball team.

Do Not Fear Jazz
Feb 1, 2005

EMBRACE IT


We're currently using the API (totally legally) to introduce price fixing for resources.

jumba
Sep 6, 2004

Hang in there!


Hajj Podge posted:



In two days I've looted $10m from idiot pubbies and spent half of it on a pointless baseball team.


Baseball is not pointless! It is to see who I will declare war on when I get big enough because they didn't want to play baseball with me.

Aesculus
Mar 22, 2013



I gambled away my earnings from beating up 30+ city nations and won 50 million, then spent it all on my baseball team which I am now spamming games on to avoid bill lock while blockaded by said 30 city nations. This game has a lot of dumb and almost pointless gimmicks for being basically another CN clone.

Sardonik
Jul 1, 2005



Aesculus posted:

I gambled away my earnings from beating up 30+ city nations and won 50 million, then spent it all on my baseball team which I am now spamming games on to avoid bill lock while blockaded by said 30 city nations. This game has a lot of dumb and almost pointless gimmicks for being basically another CN clone.

Ah yes, the 'Tropico' school of nation management.

Do Not Fear Jazz
Feb 1, 2005

EMBRACE IT


A good baseball team is the very definition of a nation state.

LiberalExtinction
Aug 4, 2009



Got our raid bot up and running that helps us weed out broke pubbies. Saves us from wasting time beating up on deadbeats.

Ruzihm
Aug 11, 2010

Group up and push mid, proletariat!





Is it safe to attack aargh members? Or should we only attack members of non protected alliances below a certain size?

HallelujahLee
May 3, 2009


I wouldn't recommend hitting arrghfhgfghfd members yet just go after non protected alliances.

Ruzihm
Aug 11, 2010

Group up and push mid, proletariat!





someone linked a really juicy (inactive, high level) target in the raid bot channel. Is it actually more profitable to raid inactives than pubbies who will try to fight back?

Creed Reunion Tour
Jul 3, 2007

by Cyrano4747


Grimey Drawer

Do you have some quality pubbie tears to showcase?

CRIP EATIN BREAD
Jun 24, 2002

Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T





Soiled Meat

Does this require sledding like CN did?

Ruzihm
Aug 11, 2010

Group up and push mid, proletariat!





CRIP EATIN BREAD posted:

Does this require sledding like CN did?
all bill/tax collection is automatic so no

Sardonik
Jul 1, 2005



Creed Reunion Tour posted:

Do you have some quality pubbie tears to showcase?

Not just yet, I expect we'll be getting a significant haul when we officially post our declaration of existence.

Normie Chomsky
Apr 10, 2008




CRIP EATIN BREAD posted:

Does this require sledding like CN did?

Thankfully no, and it's much much easier to build up quickly because there aren't ridiculous caps on aid and there's a proper alliance banking system etc

Do Not Fear Jazz
Feb 1, 2005

EMBRACE IT


The best part of this game is that fact that pubbies will come into our discord, proceed to get angry about the word "goons" then DM you to tell you about yourself.



There is also a nazi weeb alliance full of literally poo poo head nazis that post asinine hitler memes & will one day be ripe for destruction.

E: We also have a raid bot in the discord so that you can use the games API to pull stats about possible raid targets and only pick the juiciest available nations.

Basically this is easy mode CN.

Do Not Fear Jazz fucked around with this message at 03:24 on Sep 11, 2019

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Ruzihm
Aug 11, 2010

Group up and push mid, proletariat!





Do Not Fear Jazz posted:

E: We also have a raid bot in the discord so that you can use the games API to pull stats about possible raid targets and only pick the juiciest available nations.

this is actually super important because attacking the wrong nation will literally earn you 0 loot no matter how thoroughly you beat them.

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