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serious gaylord
Sep 16, 2007

what.


It has been precisely 5 years since the last thread was started for the 104th Tour de France. The 1st stage of that tour finished in Harrogate and it seems quite apt that this thread is started after one of the best* world championships in years also finished in Harrogate.

Much has changed since 2014. Cyclocross is mainstream. Womens cycling is huge. The spring classics aren't a punch up between Cancellara and Boonen. Theres E sports Bib Shorts now and we compare zwift KOM's like they're a real thing. However some things do remain the same. Quintana is poo poo, anyone but Valverde and Greg Van Avermaet has such a big ego he'd throw away his chances to win a World Championship just to make sure one of his team mates doesn't win it instead.

The road season is now over, the grand tours won by a mistake, a 12 year old and a skier and the new World champion had 160 to 1 odds to win at the start of the day. Its amazing what happens when Chris Froome breaks every bone in his body. So without further ado, lets get into it.

SO WHAT IS PRO CYCLING

Its when you watch people cause varying levels of physical pain to themselves, their rivals, their team mates if they're in a Movistar kit and occasionally members of the public. There's various disciplines, but we tend to focus on the Lycra type in here; Road, track and Cyclocross. The baggy shorts and body armour stuff can get right out.

ROAD RACING

You know what, nothing describes road racing more than this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UsPFr8Y4ZKY

Excessively long, ridiculously tactical and a single moment of hesitation where you lose everything. But lets be honest, road cycling is the Tour. The Tour is road cycling.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DFttKvN9X9w

We all love it. A glorified travel show for 5 hours every day throughout summer, culminating in some of the most exciting moments you will see in cycling. Brutal mountain fights, surprise crosswinds and unexpected heroes. We were all Julian Alaphillipe, slowly dying on the side of that mountain, desperately trying to cling onto yellow.



And if its not the tour, its the spring classics. The queen of them all - Paris Roubaix.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZE-s56OP3rs

Proper riding that.


TRACK RACING

Track is not my thing. I love watching it, but never understand it and I think that's half the charm. Hurtling around wooden boards at 35mph with no brakes, millimeters from each others wheels. Motorbikes everywhere, throwing each other up the track. Its bananas.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wIuVrUxeW0

Fyi the Madison is the best event.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qW3dOWItii0

Also you have absolute monsters on it like Robert Forstemann



CYCLOCROSS









Pretty much sums it up. Its road racing for lunatics that decided the relatively safety of tarmac really wasn't for them, hopped some fences and tore up a few farmers fields before being chased into the forest and up the hill. I'm pretty sure the Belgians invented it because it rewards bravery, stupidity and tolerance for alcohol in equal measure.

The races are short on varied terrain. Sand, snow, gravel, mud, lots of mud. Obstacles to jump, tight corners. Silly gradient hills you have to run both up and slide on your face down. Frankly its simultaneously the most fun and the most pain you can have on two wheels.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ST9LL2BZ6c

The sport is currently dominated by Wout Van Aert and Mathieu van der Poel. Who after getting bored with winning literally everything shifted over to the road this year and proceeded to dominate there too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6rA9zou0PU

Its Cyclocross and track season now. The road bikes have been put away until Spring. Wout van Aert is currently recovering after a fence went through his leg so I expect Van der Poel to win literally everything, and its the build up to the 2020 Olympics for the track stars.

The next big event is the Cyclocross world cup in Bern on the 20th of October.

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Feels Villeneuve
Oct 7, 2007

Kanye West - Touch the Sky


Cross season is going to kill me.


e) also cmon there's still Lombardia. Road season isn't dead yet!!

MrL_JaKiri
Sep 23, 2003

Ask me about my calm and reasonable opinions on cycling!

I am in no way a zealot about cycling!

Cycling helmets are ABSOLUTE HARAM!


serious gaylord posted:

ROAD RACING

You know what, nothing describes road racing more than this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tsk3zAZyLaQ

Smirr
Jun 28, 2012



Excellent OP, OP, although I was also going to point out that you forgot about the Lombardia. The season's still real to me, dammit

e: also, and I know this was a group project, but the title is absolutely excellent. AGAB

Feels Villeneuve
Oct 7, 2007

Kanye West - Touch the Sky


please change thread to the DRUGS tag, mods

e) also i can do a basic overview of the road season if anyone wants that, as if any newbies are going to get into road cycling in the year 2020

peanut-
Feb 17, 2004


Fun Shoe

Excellent OP, OP.

Paris-Tours owned last year, anyone know if they’ve brought back the exciting route or the riders moaned them into making it boring again?

Smirr
Jun 28, 2012



peanut- posted:

Excellent OP, OP.

Paris-Tours owned last year, anyone know if they’ve brought back the exciting route or the riders moaned them into making it boring again?



As far as I can tell, this is exactly the same as last year's course. No more Mr Ruban Jaune Guy

bicievino
Feb 5, 2015



I'm so happy that Valverde did loving nothing at worlds. I hope he retires already so we can forget about him.

bicievino
Feb 5, 2015



Also, I'm very sad that Boels-Dolmans is losing their sponsorship for next year. The UCI WWT requirements for 2020 are rough. Hope they can find new sponsors in time...

Good Dog
Oct 16, 2008

Who threw this cat at me?

Clapping Larry

Welcome to the pro cycling thread, the only place on the internet where people talk like this:

serious gaylord posted:


Proper riding that.

Skarsnik
Oct 21, 2008

I...AM...RUUUDE!






Has anyone said bintana yet

Vando
Oct 26, 2007

I want to be one of
those madmen


It's only page 1 but already I'm hearing that Tejay has been dropped

Literally Lewis Hamilton
Feb 22, 2005

#JusticeForBreonnaTaylor
#BlackLivesMatter
#StillIRise
#Blessed




Carpet
Apr 1, 2005
Scientology - It's the gift that keeps on taking!

Had a good weekend riding and spectating in Yorkshire - weather turned out good on Saturday in the end, and I got a discarded bidon too. Drove up to Kidstone on Sunday, got wet for 20 minutes, then watched the rest in the pub.

https://imgur.com/a/YBU1F8L

also turns out this bridge they worked so hard to repair didn't get used in the end lol

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2...te-grinton-moor

paddyboat
Feb 20, 2013

Maxi, Maxi Rodriguez
Run down the wing for me

nice, very nice

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Uuc_EYNNsM

HappyCamperGL
May 18, 2014



bicycles!

Rojkir
Jun 26, 2007

WARNING:I AM A FASCIST PIECE OF SHIT.
Police beatings get me hard


Excellent start this

Feels Villeneuve
Oct 7, 2007

Kanye West - Touch the Sky


I knew Worlds was a tough race but the post-race picture of Alaphillippe was



poor guy looks like he's just come back from a war

Smirr
Jun 28, 2012



Feels Villeneuve posted:

I knew Worlds was a tough race but the post-race picture of Alaphillippe was



poor guy looks like he's just come back from a war

drat, this photo rules

serious gaylord
Sep 16, 2007

what.


This is one of my fav cycling photos ever



Also Greipel has terminated his contract with Arkea Samsic, he's either about to come back to a World Tour team or retire.

Petit Gregory
Feb 13, 2012

H E Y , Y O U ! W H A T ' S U P ,
M A N ? G I V E M E M O N E Y ,
P L E A S E !






My favorite will always be the time Jensie borrowed a kids bike to stay within the time cut.

Literally Lewis Hamilton
Feb 22, 2005

#JusticeForBreonnaTaylor
#BlackLivesMatter
#StillIRise
#Blessed




Petit Gregory posted:

My favorite will always be the time Jensie borrowed a kids bike to stay within the time cut.



This owns

Grimson
Dec 16, 2004



Paris - Roubaix regularly has some of the best photos.



Hand Knit
Oct 24, 2005

Beer Loses more than a game Sunday ...
We lost our Captain, our Teammate, our Friend Kelly Calabro...
Rest in Peace my friend you will be greatly missed..

What thread tag do you want, assume poo poo post isn't a mistake?

MrL_JaKiri
Sep 23, 2003

Ask me about my calm and reasonable opinions on cycling!

I am in no way a zealot about cycling!

Cycling helmets are ABSOLUTE HARAM!


Hand Knit posted:

What thread tag do you want, assume poo poo post isn't a mistake?

Drugs

Hand Knit
Oct 24, 2005

Beer Loses more than a game Sunday ...
We lost our Captain, our Teammate, our Friend Kelly Calabro...
Rest in Peace my friend you will be greatly missed..


Yes, that sounds right.

HappyCamperGL
May 18, 2014



Hand Knit posted:

What thread tag do you want, assume poo poo post isn't a mistake?

It's a tribute to big Tommy Dumoulin.

serious gaylord
Sep 16, 2007

what.


Can't believe the shitpost tag was changed

Literally Lewis Hamilton
Feb 22, 2005

#JusticeForBreonnaTaylor
#BlackLivesMatter
#StillIRise
#Blessed




I’m extremely disappointed

serious gaylord
Sep 16, 2007

what.


https://twitter.com/wcsbike/status/...erland-crash%2F

iospace
Jan 19, 2038




Smirr
Jun 28, 2012




lol

kemikalkadet
Sep 16, 2012




This was definitely a punch thrown by someone with cyclist arms.

Heliosicle
May 16, 2013

Arigato, Racists.



I'm sure this will always be relevant

And a nice up to date OP, OP

serious gaylord
Sep 16, 2007

what.


https://twitter.com/Cyclingnewsfeed...220092677799936


Lmao

Vando
Oct 26, 2007

I want to be one of
those madmen


It was a garbage ruling in the long storied history of garbage British Cycling rulings, they banned him for breaking a rule 3 months before it was written. Whole thing is an arse-covering exercise for them not running locked ingame equipment in the races.

Loving Africa Chaps
Dec 3, 2007


We had not left it yet, but when I would wake in the night, I would lie, listening, homesick for it already.



lmao that there was literally pay to win stuff in a national championships

lmao

quote:

using a bot to ride at a weight of 45kg, doing 2000W for over 200km

just lmao

Vando
Oct 26, 2007

I want to be one of
those madmen


Loving Africa Chaps posted:

lmao that there was literally pay to win stuff in a national championships

Not even pay to win, it's 50,000m of ingame climbing and holy poo poo you best believe I'm shortcutting that any way I can if I want to race online, same as everyone else with a brain

TobinHatesYou
Aug 14, 2007

wacky cycling inflatable
tube man


1) It's against the ToS to bot in Zwift, but this punishment isn't coming from Zwift.
2) British Cycling is levying the punishment, and yes it seems harsh.
3) Events with this level of "prestige" should use a small selection of spec in-game equipment. Perhaps offer a few presets like a lightweight bike, an all-rounder and an aero bike. This mechanism is already in the game.
4) Zwift is simply pay-to-play, not pay-to-win.

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paddyboat
Feb 20, 2013

Maxi, Maxi Rodriguez
Run down the wing for me

i got yelled at for posting about the red hook crit crash and y’all in here talking about video games, smh

paddyboat fucked around with this message at 23:51 on Oct 4, 2019

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