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Iron Prince
Aug 28, 2005
Buglord
A loose female acquaintance of mine calls me at 1:00am today and asks me if I could print something on the computer for her and bring it over in the afternoon. "Hey yeah sure sure, whatever you need I'll help you, I'm all yours," I tell her. She sends me this file and lo and behold I can't open it. It's made in Microsoft Publisher and I don't have that program so I begin panicing, trying to find this program or a way to print the file. Scouring the internet yields no results and I do my usual pacing in my room.

I finally come up with an idea and I tell the girl, if I can proceed with it. The plan was I would carry my printer about 2miles to her house, print out the needed pages, maybe talk to her a bit while I was there. I was hoping for at least a hug out of this ordeal.

By the time I get there, I'm wet all over from sweating in the +90 degree heat outside and carrying a heavy motherfucking HP Deskjet printer. The first thing I see upon entering her room (my first time in a girl's bedroom) are some panties on her bed.

After the initial shock of seeing such a horrific sight for the first time, I setup the printer and get my job done. However, I did consider sniffing the lingere when she left the room once, but with the wuss that I am, I just ended up staring at them the whole while. That was a sarcastic joke for those of you too stupid to realize that

To make a long story short, just as I was finishing up with the printing job (which was hefty), her boyfriend and his gay friend walk in, say hello, and begin hanging out in the room as they waited for the girl to finish this work so they could go to the mall.

This effectively ruins my chances of getting a hug and I walk another 2 miles home with the motherfucking printer in hand. The only thing that I got out of this were some very painful fingers and a "thanks" as I walked out her bedroom door.

So, am I pathetic for doing all these things? It wouldn't be the first time I've pledged my heart and soul to a girl and gotten back almost nothing in return. I would hate turning her or anyone else I knew down or making up some lie.

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Cubone
May 26, 2011

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.
lisa

Punkinhead
Apr 2, 2015

barg somson

Archer666
Dec 27, 2008
I like the Margaritaville Simpsomp

Gay Weed Dad
Jul 12, 2016

cool dude, flyin' high
To me, the best "simps" are the vaginas that look like a homer's mouth but I wont post them here.

Pastry of the Year
Apr 12, 2013

Gay Weed Dad posted:

To me, the best "simps" are the vaginas that look like a homer's mouth but I wont post them here.

:dudsmile:

Salty Josh
Jul 13, 2016

Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can't take it, and my heart is just going to cave in.
Nap Ghost

Absolutely the best. Even if there is a little 5 o'clock shadow on em.

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

Hey Hey Let's Go! 喧嘩する
大切な物を protect my balls


ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
Fart Simpson. :sexarse:

Guildenstern Mother
Mar 31, 2010

Why walk when you can ride?

Gay Weed Dad posted:

To me, the best "simps" are the vaginas that look like a homer's mouth but I wont post them here.

I really hate that I learned about this last year.

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StarkRavingMad
Sep 27, 2001


Yams Fan
https://twitter.com/maki_itoh/status/1294291369846964224?s=20

https://twitter.com/maki_itoh/status/1385966985964507146?s=20

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