Agrikk posted:

When I was in middle school I was getting bullied pretty hard by two kids and the school wasn’t doing much about it. My dad asked me if he should talk to their parents about it but I opted out of that because it would most certainly blow back on me on the court of school society so I was just putting up with it.

But my granddad heard about it and told me a story about when he was getting bullied many decades ago. Apparently my grandfather called out the head bully to an” official fight” in the gym boxing ring with gloves and whatnot as was done back then and got his rear end kicked in but the bully left him alone after that. The lesson here was to stand up for yourself and the bully will leave you alone.

I’m all for that but not with the “getting your rear end kicked” part so one day I walked up behind one of my bullies and smashed him in the face with a textbook.

I got suspended, my parents yelled at me because violence is not the answer, but my grandfather have me a hug and said, “well done.”

My grandfather ruled. RIP

The Glumslinger posted:

My (23F) boyfriend (28M) is really into anime and has several "waifus" and I'm not sure how to feel about it

He is really into anime, I like anime too, just not as much as him. He told me he had a waifu from day one and it didn't bother me at that time. However, we officially moved in together a few months ago and now I am seeing the full extent of his "waifu" love. For context, we share an office, half of it is his and half of it is mine. On his side, he has posters, figurines, etc. He essentially has a shrine to her in our office. Most of these figurines are very graphic and sexual

DeadMansSuspenders posted:

Does anyone remember the post that was about a famous magicians home and his girlfriend wanted to get rid of his Gothic and occult stuff and redecorate with like Pier 17 furniture? Pretty sure it was from her viewpoint and we all signs pointed to it being about Criss Angel.
It was entertaining and I want to read it

quote:

Hi Reddit, this is my first time posting here. I found this forum after looking for advice elsewhere on the web. Hope you guys can help me out!

My fiancee and I met about a 1.5 years ago and fell in love pretty immediately. Everything about this guy is great. No relationship problems worth mentioning here.

About my fiancee "Paul" -- he is well-known in his field (famous, you could say). For the sake of this post, because it's what I came across while researching this "problem," let's just say he's a famous magician. It's actually not too far off from my fiancee's actual job. Think similar theatrics involved. The point is, it's a career that not many get to the top of. He did and he should be so proud.

So, as you can imagine, being a magician is not really job, it's an identity. Everything in my fiancee's house, which he purchased and remodeled before we met, is custom-made to his magician tastes/interests. We're talking custom-made "throne-esque" chairs hand-carved with specific birds on them, weird sculptures all over the yard, an entire library of magic books and magic artifacts collected over many, many years, etc.

Let's not stop at the furniture! Even the refrigerator handles were custom-fabricated to look like 1900's magic accessories owned by one of his magic heroes. This level of detail extends through the entire. House. I really mean it when I say that not one detail was spared. Even the toilets are custom.

I am very easy-going and I 100% support my fiancee's love of his job/interest. Obviously, this is partially what attracted me -- the passion.

But I can't live in Harry Potter's castle forever.

I am wondering how I can tactfully bring this up -- the possibly of, after we're married, creating some more "neutral" spaces in the house that also feel like mine. I'll be honest, right now I feel like I'm at a constant sleepover at a museum.

Ideally, I would love for the house to be more Restoration Hardware-esque, but I realize this is not going to happen and probably isn't realistic or fair, since he's the one who worked to become so successful that he could afford all this stuff. It would crush him to get rid of all the things that remind him of his passion. I mean, don't get me wrong, the house is amazing...but it feels like it's literally a toy store, or a theme park or something.

So, I'm torn. First, how I bring up this difficult conversation (he is someone who is very sensitive and will 100% take this personally) that I don't like his house (he thinks I love it, because I was in awe when I first walked in), and also, how much is too much to ask him to change, given that our amazing lives are possibly because of his success in this field.

tldr: My fiancee's house looks like Harry Potter world. How do I go about asking him to change it?

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for ignoring my parents?

13Pandora13 posted:

No, you have been dating a spy.

Unrelated to this post, but to everyone suggesting retaliating against a bully with physical violence - when was the last time you were in a public school? The result of this would be next to no punishment for the bully and suspension, if not expulsion, for the victim. We are decades past a "schoolyard fight" having no meaningful consequence and the students parting ways with a score settled.

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for ignoring my parents?

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

from the old thread

Hate my (29/f) fiancee's (52/m) million dollar dream house full of magic-themed decor. What do I do?

Smirking_Serpent posted:

WIBTAH if I go to work Saturday and therefore breaking a promise I made to my boyfriend.

DreamingofRoses posted:

hosed up marital income distribution you say?

WIBTA if I got help from a charity, despite our joint income being very high?


And the update:

SneezeOfTheDecade posted:

"I'm not going to tell you why I'm upset and punishing you, you have to figure it out yourself" is Abusive Behavior 101.

Bruceski posted:

"Within COVID guidelines"
"Easter Mass"

I know, it's old hat by now but I keep spotting these things.

bell jar posted:

Yeah the parents should absolutely just from...their daughter, who just wanted them to wish her happy birthday and is overreacting about it, before she ??? abuses them further

OP posted:

They had 3 months to grieve and I didn’t include this in the post but I’m sick of it. I want them to focus their attention on me. My mom should be able to suck up her grief for one day to spoil me or else she’s going to lose her daughter in the future

OP posted:

To me, being an adult has nothing to do with it. Even when I’m 90, I still want my birthday to be all about me. It’s a day to celebrate a person and I wanted to be celebrated

OP posted:

I disagree and I don’t think my behavior is immature. I think my parents are rude for forgetting my birthday so I’m only giving them a taste of their own medicine. If my behaviour is immature than surely them forgetting my birthday warrants the same judgement, no?

titty_baby_ posted:

I'm glad she made the right decision but..where is $50k a year big earner status?

quote:

I woke up today with my sister saying that one of my cousins is pregnant with her third child. Both her and my mother were so surprised with the news (not in a positive way), and I didn't say a word because I was prepping myself to work.

If you wonder why they reacted badly to it, it's because this is her third child so far. Frankly, we don't know her limits so she might do more as time passes.

Anyway, while I was on lunch, she texted me through Messenger on Facebook and told me the news about her third kid.

Here's the thing... I'm not fond of this cousin. We're not enemies, but there are times I wish we were. She's really forceful, irritating, shady, a known liar... a bad company to be around, at all.

My day today wasn't the best so I didn't give her any commemorative message or whatnot, just an ironic "wow". She said I was being rude to her and that she expected me to be more respectful towards her, since she'll give birth to another beautiful kid.

I told her to go check a mirror because she can't call herself a mother when it's my aunt that takes care of her kids and now will have yet another responsibility under her arms while my cousin was partying and being a b**** in heat making kids just for the fun of it.

She instantly blocked me.

Just now, my mom questioned me if I said something to her and I told her the truth. She then said that my sister saw a post where she spoke that, basically, "someone she dearly loved was another freaking backstabbing bastard" and other stuff. She also said that everyone in the family WhatsApp group (I left it) is talking stuff about me and how I wasn't being sensible with her situation.

Being real honest, she's no mother to any of her kids. Her first child literally tells my aunt to f*** off and calls her a b****, and she lost her second child through a lawsuit where the father proved her neglect and that she was doping the kid so it would go to sleep. Also, she's a drug addict that leaves her kid with my aunt to go have her "fun" with that boyfriend of hers.

Well... AITA?

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for telling my cousin that she can't call herself a mother when my aunt will have to take care of her new and third kid?

Evil Willow posted:

This post (and her one in r/relationship_advice) are ones everyone should seek out and read her comments. She's a bit of a piece of work! Some choice comments:

Barudak posted:

I'm gonna give th me raised by grandparents until teenage and preyed upon by an abuser a lot of leeway on not understanding financials

titty_baby_ posted:

I'm glad she made the right decision but..where is $50k a year big earner status?

Irukandji Syndrome posted:

Hey, sorry to drag this up from a few pages back, but I feel like I need to point out this is a really hosed up thing to say. Nobody's saying you have to stay with an HIV positive partner, and I sure as gently caress don't think OP should because of the obvious poo poo going on there, but "there is no option for a little bit of normal" is a hosed up thing to say about a super stigmatized disease that disproportionately affects vulnerable populations, some of which are already at a higher risk of suicide without reading things like "this disease fucks you up, it's too expensive to live, and you're literally never going to have a normal life".

Maybe you don't mean it that way, but that is unfortunately how it read (at least to me).

quote:

Okay, just so you guys know, I've been officially diagnosed with DID when I was 16 after YEARS of therapy. I only have one other 'complete' alter but I'm so glad I have him! I feel like without him I wouldn't know how to function at all, lol. I'm a 17 year old highschooler, currently in 12th grade with a LOT of work to do... WAY too much for me, hehe. My grades have always ever been average while his have been literally on an entirely other level, like 4.0 GPA kind of level. Even though we're twins we're complete opposites on everything too! I'm a girl, he's a boy, I'm outgoing and he's cold, I'm (only kind of) childish and he's mature. There's more but that would be boring to just list out.

Well, the reason for this post is to say how happy I am for having him! He does my school work, my chores, and basically most of my responsibilities(dont judge me pls...), without him I feel like I wouldn't be as carefree, and I mean "Ladeedadeeda~" kind of carefree if you get what I mean, lol you probably don't, nevermind.

But there's one problem I'm having. Should I ask him not to do everything for me, even though he says he wants to? I've asked my therapist this and she said to just ask him myself. But I don't want to take what he says is his "meaning of existence" away from him, even though I don't quite get what he means by that... What should I do? I feel kind of useless doing nothing but having fun and not thinking of anything, like I'm a parasite or something. He treats me like I'm some sort of child to take care of. And he also seems really stressed about graduation that's coming up in a few weeks. Any advice?

TL;DR : My brother does everything for me, and I'm happy about that, but I want to feel more useful. Any advice?

RumbleFish posted:

I'm gonna add support for this because I also thought that post was a little hysterical and out of pocket, but it goes to show how strong and pervasive the stigma against HIV really is. The reality is that you can, in fact, have a pretty normal life while positive these days; it's a cliche to put it this way, but HIV is not a death sentence anymore. Sure, you have to take daily meds for the rest of your life, but it's not functionally much different from managing many other chronic conditions. With proper adherence to said meds, positive people become undetectable and basically unable to transmit it to partners (I say "basically" because there's been research indicating this is the case, but I don't know if that's a scientific consensus). There's also a prophylaxis that negative partners can take to prevent themselves from getting HIV and it's insanely effective (as in I think there's been maybe one or two cases ever, worldwide, of someone becoming positive on it). Living with HIV is still a big deal, don't me wrong -- I certainly wouldn't sign up for it, and if someone isn't willing to date a positive partner, that's their prerogative. But there's a lot of needless cruelty and ignorance surrounding the disease these days because most people have seemingly not bothered to update their perception of it past like, 1993.

The Bramble posted:

Advice on How to Get More Responsibilities From My Overprotective Brother?


This person is referring to their alter-ego as their "brother", yes.

GlyphGryph posted:

If you can't fight a bully straight on, the sucker punch is always the right choice.

The Bramble posted:

Advice on How to Get More Responsibilities From My Overprotective Brother?


This person is referring to their alter-ego as their "brother", yes.

Sunswipe posted:

I question how much we can trust the guy who cheated on his partner without using protection to manage his medical condition properly.

Evil Willow posted:

This post (and her one in r/relationship_advice) are ones everyone should seek out and read her comments. She's a bit of a piece of work! Some choice comments:

Sunswipe posted:

I question how much we can trust the guy who cheated on his partner without using protection to manage his medical condition properly.

JeremoudCorbynejad posted:

The Bramble posted:

Advice on How to Get More Responsibilities From My Overprotective Brother?

The Bramble posted:

Advice on How to Get More Responsibilities From My Overprotective Brother?


This person is referring to their alter-ego as their "brother", yes.

pentyne posted:

I thought the whole "we're 2 separate people" thing for multiple personality had been completely debunked. I don't know why any real therapist would indulge the whole "talk to your other side" thing.

The Bramble posted:

The median annual income in the US is $31,000. These forums skew heavily white, male, college-educated, and urban, which is why that number might seem shockingly low.

titty_baby_ posted:

I thought it was at least $45k, but I may he thinking of the mean. I guess my view is also colored from living my whole life in California

pentyne posted:

I thought the whole "we're 2 separate people" thing for multiple personality had been completely debunked. I don't know why any real therapist would indulge the whole "talk to your other side" thing.

pentyne posted:

I thought the whole "we're 2 separate people" thing for multiple personality had been completely debunked. I don't know why any real therapist would indulge the whole "talk to your other side" thing.

ikanreed posted:

What this poster is, is a highly suggestable teen who found some story that helped them deflect the stresses of their life.