r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Grape posted:

lol most Chinese immigrant communities are Cantonese speaking. This loving hypocritical idiot.

However how else does one pronounce cappuccino in English? "Cappa-chino" is the only way I've ever heard it??

I assume he just sounds like Mario whenever he uses an Italian loanword.

# ¿ Jul 19, 2020 20:43

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 22:21

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

DreamingofRoses posted:

AITA for telling my niece she was a product of infidelity?

Sucks she found out like this, but the niece had to be told at some point at least so she doesn't give doctors a falsified medical history.

e: oops, snipe. content:

AITA for not wanting my bf to move in with me?

quote:

So i like my bf but I dont know if this is the right timing for us. We've been together for about 10 months and he has recently started asking to move in with me.

My initial reaction was happiness, I was excited to spend more time with him but as he's been staying with me more(3-4 nights per week) there's a few things that have been bothering me.

My bf tends to just drop stuff and not pick it up, I have a small condo so piles of clothes and stuff tend to be quite noticeable when there's basically only a handful of surfaces. I have asked him to pick stuff up and he just shrugs it off.

He stays up late gaming and refuses to wear headphones so it keeps me up at night(once again its a small condo so hard to get away from noise). He works from 12pm-9pm(4 days a week) so feels like he should be able to enjoy his evenings, but i work from 6am-4pm(5 days a week) and I drive heavy machinery so its important I get enough sleep and im alert enough for work.

He recently was telling me about how much he was going to save by not paying rent(he currently pays $210/wk), and I questioned why he thought he would be living rent free with me, he argued that he shouldn't have to contribute to my mortgage, and I agreed but said that I would still want about 50% of market rent(market rent is around $220 and i said i would like $100/week, my mortgage payments are $340/week so its not like he's paying half my mortgage). This turned into a rather large argument and he repeatedly slammed doors in my condo and damaged the lock on one. He then got mad when I asked him to help fix it.

He has repeatedly suggested that if he moved in then my cat would have to be confined to the hall cupboard when he's here because he doesn't like cats(he's not allergic, he just doesn't like them). I disagree and think that's unfair to my 11yo cat who has had the run of the place for the last 4 years.

Long story short, my bfs current rental period is up end of July and he has repeatedly talked about moving here rather than finding somewhere else, ive consistently rebutted this but finally put my foot down last weekend after he deliberately let my cat outside and said he absolutely wouldn't be moving in with me and I wanted him to move his gaming stuff out if my lounge/kitchen area. He threw a massive fit and stormed off and now his mum is ringing me and calling me a lot of rather rude things because he's going to have to move back in with them until he finds a new place. AITA for mot letting him move in, even though I was initially keen?

Just break up.

AreWeDrunkYet fucked around with this message at 21:25 on Jul 19, 2020

# ¿ Jul 19, 2020 21:19

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Pocky In My Pocket posted:

Its still a lovely thing to do

He shouldn't have surprised the host, but otherwise who cares? It's not like he burst in during dinner with pizza, everyone got a chance to focus on the prepared meal and he got plenty of pizza in case anyone else wanted some.

This one reminds me of the other story where a lady threw a stuffy party, then got upset when her partner came home with some racks of Bud Light and turned it into a rager because apparently that's what their friends wanted.

# ¿ Jul 20, 2020 02:21

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Being sneaky about it like the guy in the story is weird, sure. But even if you are invited to dinner, once everyone has finished eating and is hanging out after the meal there's nothing rude about saying "Dinner was delicious, but is anyone else still hungry? I was thinking about ordering some pizza, it's on me."

For what it's worth, I can't recall a party where the hosts didn't have too much food so it's a moot point in practice.

AreWeDrunkYet fucked around with this message at 06:00 on Jul 20, 2020

# ¿ Jul 20, 2020 05:53

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

SerialKilldeer posted:

AITA for buying Uranium without my wife�s permission?

Call me a stick in the mud, but bringing radioactive material into a house seems like the kind of thing you want all the occupants on board for. In advance.

# ¿ Jul 22, 2020 17:04

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Scaevolus posted:

Raw uranium ore is dangerous mostly in the same ways that lead is dangerous-- it's a toxic heavy metal that will accumulate in your cells and poison you.

And that's a great conversation to have with your partner before the package gets there.

# ¿ Jul 22, 2020 22:19

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Straight White Shark posted:

a bland "meat and 2 veg" diet or whatever basic staple food you like is still head and shoulders over being a tendies only manchild. laughing at picky manchildren is not necessarily an assault on normal rear end people who mostly just eat whatever staple they like but don't recoil in horror if there is An Vegetable on their plate

Not that it has anything to do with someone who only eats chicken tendies, but for most of post-agricultural human history the large majority of our calories came from the local staple grain. Meat and vegetables were included where possible to add nutrients and flavor, but people in general lived and died based on the wheat/rice/barley harvest.

# ¿ Jul 23, 2020 18:48

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Is it really that hard of a concept that if you want to do pretty much anything that's going to attract attention at a party, you should clear it with the host first? Some people getting married might have no problem with someone else using the fact that everyone is gathered to propose, but it should never be a surprise for the bride or groom.

# ¿ Jul 24, 2020 23:49

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

SiKboy posted:

Why do some people care so deeply about what other people eat? Its 2020 we are living in a hellworld in the middle of a global pandemic. If someone eating goddamn coco pops or sugar puffs (or well done steak, or vegetarian food, or whatever) helps them get through the day maybe get off their dick and mind your business.

It's more sugar than most people should eat regularly, but in this thread that rates so low on personal faults that it doesn't even register. Someone out there is going to post a story about how their partner, who they refuse to break up with, has structured their life entirely around kids' breakfast cereals, decorates their house with cereal memorabilia, and insists on dressing in cereal mascot costumes for sex.

# ¿ Jul 25, 2020 02:50

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

AITA? My GF won't stop buying jars, I told her she needs to stop it and this is out of control

quote:

hi, sorry about the throwaway account didn't want to post this from my main. My GF of 2 years and I moved in together in January, Im 28 she's 27. Everything is going great except we keep fighting over her obsession with buying jars.

It started in the kitchen, she bought all these glass jars/containers to keep all the food in, like rice and lentils and things are all in these glass jars she got instead of in the cabinet in the normal box. Also these big plastic things for cereal. I asked her why keeping it in the box/container it comes in isn't enough because I thought this was really weird. She says she likes how they look, and I said I didn't and she said also that she's worried about bugs and that sealed jars keep things fresher. Also she buys things from bulk bins to save money (?) and she doesnt want to keep rice in a grocery plastic bag, which ok, thats fair, i can see how that might get annoying.

I still think it's a lot of work and a waste of money to buy all these jars but I decided, whatever, I guess I have to compromise. Also I think it looks sort of like we live in a mad scientists lab in a horror movie with all these things in jars, but whatever.

But the last straw was today, I got home from work and she had somehow ordered all these little jars that are now on the shelf above the toilet with all kinds of bathroom things in them. Like the qtips and cotton balls and floss picks and things are now in these glass jars. Qtips and cotton balls dont come in bulk bins, I don't understand why she's wasting money on all these jars when we have a medicine cabinet where you can keep those things just fine in the package they come in.

I told her that I didn't like the jars and that I didn't want my house full of containers i dont see a porpose for, and that I dont want her buying any more. She says she was just trying to keep things organized and look nice, but I don't think it looks nice to have a bunch of qtips on a shelf over the toilet and that its a waste of money and time. I told her that I think this is getting out of control and she got upset and said that she didn't do anything wrong and was just trying to be nice, but I still don't understand how buying so many pointless jars is nice. AITA?

Was hoping for a good time based on the title, but it turns out the girlfriend is a perfectly normal person.

# ¿ Jul 25, 2020 03:08

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

AITA for taking the man's cereal?

quote:

About a week ago I was at a little party at a mutual friend's place. Another mutual friend of mine had drank too much so him, a different friend, and I were in the bathroom with him (he has a really bad fear of vomiting). Eventually I left to grab some kind of food for him to see if it might help. I grabbed a box of cereal and returned, never seeing the host.

The friend started feeling better soon after and the cereal was never opened. I returned it to where it originally was and left soon after.

The next week, I was back at this guy's apartment and he was being very friendly, no indication anything was wrong. Later that night, I was leaving the bathroom. He stood in the doorway as I opened it and confronted me about how I should have asked before taking the cereal the previous week. He said it really upset him for the rest of that night. I told him that I understood and I was sorry he felt uncomfortable, but the cereal wasn't opened. If it had been eaten I would have let him know and given him some cash for it. He acknowledged that he knew it wasn't eaten.

The situation escalated until we were fully arguing about it and he never moved away from the door, making me feel like I couldn't leave the conversation although I know I should have (I'm a smaller lady and he is quite a bit bigger than I am). He said that I had been a bad guest, which made me feel really bad. This was the end of a rough day for me and once he moved, I left the apartment in tears.

So, am I the rear end in a top hat? Was I the victim of some sort of power trip or was I being a rude guest by not asking first?

edit: grammar

edit 2: since the word "rummaging" has been mentioned I want to clarify it was sitting out on the counter and was the first thing I saw. I don't think that changes anything but thought I'd clarify.

AreWeDrunkYet fucked around with this message at 03:29 on Jul 25, 2020

# ¿ Jul 25, 2020 03:20

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

AITA for getting annoyed that my girlfriend doesn�t cater for me when I visit?

quote:

EDIT; forgot to include ages, me (28M) girlfriend (27F) Girlfriend doesn�t have allergies or is she on a diet and doesn�t have/had any eating disorders. She was a huge chocoholic growing up but has since grown out of it

My girlfriend is pretty healthy and doesn�t really eat junk, whereas I�m the opposite. I eat junk and like to snack in the evening after dinner.

When I�m at my girlfriends place, you open the fridge and it�ll just be healthy stuff, greens, fruits and natural yogurt amongst an assortment of foods for a healthy diet. Cupboards are filled with granola, cereals and home baking stuff. The only thing she does on occasion is bake a fresh batch of cookies, but there�s no crisps, biscuits, nothing. I mean she has pumpkin seeds for Christ�s sake but not even digestives! There�s also never any alcohol there as she�s not a big drinker.

I had this problem before lockdown, where I�d spend the night or weekend and literally have nothing to snack on. She�d be fine with a bowl of grapes or blueberries but I�d want chocolate for example. She would just say �if you wanted chocolate you should have bought some.� I guess I could do that but honestly that is a huge inconvenience, and also my girlfriend tends to get rid of any junk I have, by either sending it back with me or throwing it away. Her reasoning she doesn�t want to be tempted to eat it.

Since lockdown has been eased I went over to visit her. Even though she knew I was coming over, there was nothing nice to eat! She�d cooked us pasta and we had fruit yogurts for dessert. Granted I love her cooking and appreciate the effort, I just would like some junk around the house. Last night I got pissed and irritated because with no snacks, I had to settle for toast (and even that�s whole meal!) and a cup of tea. My girlfriend only drinks herbal tea, like I think the only things she drinks are water, OJ and herbal tea.

My girlfriend told me she�d bought some teabags especially for me which I was actually quite giddy about, and upon brewing found she only had soya milk! I know it�s really petty but I can�t help but get very annoyed about it. She knows I don�t like soya, so why bother with the English breakfast tea bags if she�s not going to get normal milk as well.I�m not an angry person but I can be set off by smaller things, and this was one of them. I blew up, we argued and she asked me to leave.

I know I upset her and today I did apologise but she�s ignoring me. I sent her a long text explaining why I got angry and why I get annoyed she doesn�t accommodate me properly. I mean, I do it for her, round my place she has herbal tea, and soya milk and fruits stocked, which only she�ll eat. So is it rude of me to expect the same in return?

# ¿ Jul 25, 2020 03:32

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

AITA for saying no to becoming the full-time carer for 3 kids while their parents leave the country without a return date?

quote:

My uncle, aunt and their 3 kids (5M, 8M, 10F) recently moved here from overseas, I'm their only family member in this country.

I assumed they had a full plan re: employment, childcare, etc before their move but nope.

Tonight my uncle called and said he needs to fly back (overseas) this week otherwise he'd lose his job. My aunt also needs to fly back first week of April for work, leaving their 3 children alone in this country. They will be overseas till "at least June" and not sure of a return date yet.

They said (not ask), "you and your partner can move into our place and help out with the kids, we have no other options." In his words: "They just need school pick up, drop off, feed them cereal for breakfast, make them sandwiches for lunches and cook dinner, won't be a lot of work."

I was in shock as he was so nonchalant with this big ask, I said I had to speak with my partner first, and they need to let me know what the day-to-day logistics are.

Now, I'm a childless 28F with a full time job and a live-in partner. There's no way I can do the school pick ups and drop offs since they're during my work hours and my employer knows that I don't have kids. I have no experience in raising children and haven't even done a first aid course, I'm not qualified to take care of a 5, 8 and 10-year old especially during this sensitive health period... what if they get sick, injured or die??

If it was only for a week or so I'd happily try my best, but we are talking about minimum 3 months with no solid end date in sight.

I messaged my aunt and explained what they're essentially asking me to do is to become a working single-mum of 3 (my partner cannot move into their place with me due to his work situation) and offered another solution:

Hire a nanny or au pair to do the pick ups/drop offs and housework. I can still move in to stay with the kids so they have family around.

My aunt said no right away as "we cannot trust people we don't know".... Meanwhile they had 2 au pairs when they lived overseas.

(This may explain why they think it's "not a lot of work" to look after 3 kids as they always had au pairs and live-in family members to take care of them, so the parents never needed to, well, parent. By the time they come home from work it's 9pm so the kids are asleep or just need bedtime cuddles.)

My aunt then said "let us figure it out, no worries"... I got the vibe that they are mad at me. I left the conversation there and hope to pick it up again before my uncle flies overseas this weekend.

I got kicked out by my abusive stepmum when I was 19, and they let me stay with them for free for 1 year so I'd absolutely love to repay them and help out where I can.

But I honestly don't think I'm qualified for this responsibility - worst case would be losing my new job since I cannot give my 100% while caring for 3 kids, and the kids might get hurt or upset because I have no experience of being a parent/full time carer.

# ¿ Jul 25, 2020 05:54

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

This thread is obviously proof that's not the case, but if the answer is in doubt you shouldn't be planning a proposal. The timing, location, or method can be a surprise, but the response shouldn't be.

# ¿ Jul 25, 2020 06:32

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Tetramin posted:

Is this the same skeleton from the �SILENCE! I KEEL YOU� pics I occasionally see online? I always just thought it was a funny skeleton pic lol

E: I guess I googled it and it is pretty lovely lol. But the �silence I keel you!!� Line has usually been kind of funny to me.

Yeah, Achmed the Dead Terrorist is a lazy stereotype and was especially less than helpful with the attitude towards muslims a few years post 9/11.

# ¿ Jul 25, 2020 07:44

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Piell posted:

AITA for turning down my boyfriend's public proposal?

Once again, no one should even think about a public or showy engagement until they've discussed the matter with their partner and are absolutely sure what the answer will be. Someone else mentioned that romantic comedies have ruined some people and they assume a good relationship is built on grand gestures instead of regular, open communication.

# ¿ Jul 26, 2020 01:45

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Not Reddit, but seemed on topic. Pretty sure it's not satire.

https://biblicalgenderroles.com/2020/07/16/7-steps-to-grooming-your-christian-wife/

quote:

I read your article on 7 ways to discipline your wife and you recommend taking away her debit card. I know I could do this, but in my view, that should be the last option. I am considering starting spanking her. I have mentioned it to her, not on the budget, but in general and she is against it. She thinks spanking is treating her like a child.
...
But from a Biblical perspective, grooming when used in the sense of a husband conditioning his wife to be in complete subjection to him and molding her behavior to his preferences is not evil or immoral. But rather, these actions are righteous, holy and required of husbands by God.
...
Even if you are both Biblicist Christians, age is a major factor in a man grooming his wife. I have consistently heard from mentoring couples I have spoken with that the grooming of a bride has the most success in women under the age of 25. After that the chances of success radically fall, even with believing wives. I was given examples of Christian wives in their 30s and 40s trying to get into these mentoring programs. At the beginning of the program they really seemed like they wanted to change, but in the vast majority of the cases they exit the programs not long after entering them when they cannot make the changes necessary.
...
It is impossible to fully embrace the teachings of the Bible concerning gender roles without a husband and wife first being willing to fully reject the modern teaching of the adult/child paradigm. When a Christian wife comes to reject the adult/child paradigm, the whole �you are not my father� and �you are treating me like a child� will quickly disappear.
...
Ten years ago, I would have been against wife spanking as the concept was so foreign to me. I did not know any Christians who engaged in it. But since I started this blog back in 2014, I have had the opportunity to interact with many Christian couples who engage in wife spanking which is commonly referred to as Christian domestic discipline or CDD for short.

I have also had the opportunity to interact with some Christian husband/wife mentor teams who help teach husbands how to spank their wives and also teach the wives how to accept and embrace this kind of physical discipline from their husbands.
...
While it is a husband�s God given right to use spanking as a form of discipline on his wife (with or without her consent), a husband should be wise in regard to the hostile culture we live in. We live in culture which denies almost all the rights that God has given to a husband including his right to discipline his wife. That means that if you do not have your wife�s consent to spank her and she calls the police on you, you may go to prison for domestic abuse.
Some of the women who have contacted me over the years were raised in homes where their father spanked their mother and they expected it and even embraced the concept as they entered into their marriages. Others learned of the benefits of CDD for their marriage from other wives and embraced this practice later in life.

But then there are wives who are conditioned to accept and receive spankings from their husbands through mentoring programs. These are programs where the husband and wife work together with a husband/wife mentoring team and over time a couple learns to incorporate wife spanking into their marriage.

One of the most important things I have learned from these wife spanking mentoring couples is that it is very difficult and rare to get a wife to accept wife spanking if she is past her mid-20�s and especially into her 30�s. So, it is important to reach women with these mentoring programs while they are still young and moldable.
...
And Robert�s concern of the six-year age difference is also a result of modern cultural conditioning. Before our post-feminist society, a man being older than his wife was considered an asset, not a liability. It made it easier for him to exercise his authority over her and it made it easier for her to submit to him and respect him.

Another great asset for Robert is his wife�s parents. Too many parents today undermine the authority of their daughter�s husband. But thankfully this is not something Robert will have to worry about.

On the question of whether to pull her debtor card or spank her. I have recently had this question come up from another husband and my answer to him was �both�. While I think that spanking is the most effective disciplinary tool husbands can use with their wives, that does not mean husbands should dismiss other disciplinary tools. Especially when the infractions are financially related, taking away the debtor card is a punishment that truly does fit the sin the wife has committed.
...
But one thing you never do is surrender to her desire to control your marriage.

And do not fall for the lie of partnership marriage. No marriage is ever a true partnership. Marriage is always a patriarchy or a matriarchy. It might be a soft patriarchy or soft matriarchy where no one explicitly acknowledges being in charge, and the one in charge might actually allow great freedom to the other. But make no mistake, someone is ALWAYS in charge in a marriage. Power vacuums are never left unfilled.

# ¿ Jul 27, 2020 16:31

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Grimdude posted:

I wanted to highlight some of that wife spanking bullshit to make fun of some of the more awful segments. It really is just the whole thing though.

Like highlighting the entire chapter you were assigned for homework.

I tried to copy/paste the most eye popping stuff, but yeah, it's all just horrific all around.

# ¿ Jul 27, 2020 18:47

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

ArbitraryC posted:

lmao

One requires rearranging bones and/or organs if it's not possible naturally, the other "just" requires religious attention to diet and exercise but is naturally attainable for pretty much everyone.

# ¿ Jul 30, 2020 04:02

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

^^^Sex reveal parties don't have the same ring. And can quickly go wrong if your guests don't understand what they're being invited to.^^^

DorkusMalorkus posted:

There's this horrible song by Carrie Underwood that I have to hear a lot on the overhead music at work:

This attitude of girls can't play sports or go camping is stupidly common, I think. Why else would poo poo like this also exist:

Not to mention that people who want their kids to play football are bad parents regardless of gender.

# ¿ Jul 30, 2020 04:45

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Sleeping with animals is gross in general since the animals don't give a gently caress about hygeine, but caring about whether the girl does it naked is some weird prudish nonsense.

You wouldn't let your partner into bed if they didn't wipe their rear end in a top hat.

AreWeDrunkYet fucked around with this message at 17:36 on Jul 30, 2020

# ¿ Jul 30, 2020 17:32

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

norton I posted:

Being a Jr. isn't great, but it's a necessary step towards having Roman numerals after a name, which is cool.

Presumably Phillip II was Phillip Jr until he retconned it.

# ¿ Aug 2, 2020 16:52

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for telling my MIL that her �arrangement� is disgusting?

There's being a justified rear end in a top hat, and there's being a justified rear end in a top hat to the people currently putting a roof over your head without any obligation. Small comfort in being right and homeless.

# ¿ Aug 3, 2020 03:26

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

DreamingofRoses posted:

Any time anyone starts saying other classes of people are less than human, it�s not an rear end in a top hat move to call them disgusting.

Being an rear end in a top hat or not can be independent of being right or wrong. This thread has seen plenty of stories of someone going a lot further than the daughter there with a consensus of "harsh, but fair". But most of those scenarios also let the justified rear end in a top hat end the relationship or put the ball in the other court, daughter in law here is still reliant on the lady with weird class issues (and not a dependent minor or something).

# ¿ Aug 3, 2020 04:06

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Puppy Time posted:

Does this family communicate at all?

Evergreen thread response right there.

# ¿ Aug 4, 2020 17:26

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Switchback posted:

Yeah this thread likes to say that communication could solve tons of problems but I kind of disagree. Seems a lot of times, people just don�t agree, and more communicating doesn�t actually resolve anything.

Most of these stories I feel come down to �your stupid emotions don�t actually deserve any airtime.� Examples: �your cancer ruins my chance for biokids�, �pedophelia is a sexuality,� or �having a Taco Bell booth inside my house is not cool.�

But that does solve the problem. Open and honest communication puts the disagreement out in the open, forcing those involved to make a decision one way or the other. If the Taco Bell booth is a dealbreaker and the wife has no room for compromise, she needs to sit down with him and the husband needs to understand that and decide between the booth and his relationship. Or maybe he has some explanation that she can accept and compromise around.

The booth couple actually seem headed in that direction and she's just checking in with reddit if her position is unreasonable, but too many of these tales end up in a snipe/countersnipe of passive aggressiveness that in the worst cases has everyone involved deeply miserable for years.

# ¿ Aug 4, 2020 19:21

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Baronjutter posted:

I've never lived in a place with locks on any interior doors. Since its assumed anyone in the house is family or a trusted guest the idea of someone barging in on you without knocking was unthinkably rude.

Unless you live a dungeon the interior locks in American homes are entirely perfunctory and won't stop anyone who wants to from barging in. They're just there to cover "oops" situations where you don't realize someone is in the room or forget to knock. There's no downside if they're never used and it's like a dollar extra for an interior doorknob with an integrated lock, so the default is to install them.

# ¿ Aug 5, 2020 02:20

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

pentyne posted:

Am I wrong or is she saying that she ended her only serious relationship to this point over his addiction to camgirls?

The rest of it comes off as a giant oof with equating masturbating to cheating if it isn't her. The entire reason fantasies exist is so people can explore thoughts and ideas without actually committing any carnal sins.

I'm guessing the bf was lying to her for 6 years running about porn use or so, but trying to say "if you get turned on by anyone other then me its cheating" is a raging insecurity issue.

It's like someone who was in a bad relationship with an alcoholic and now is looking for a partner who doesn't drink at all. Understandable perhaps, but the dating pool is going to be mostly recovered alcoholics and religious fundamentalists.

# ¿ Aug 8, 2020 17:28

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Puppy Time posted:

ESH, just block and move on with life.

Send the pictures, then block everyone involved.

# ¿ Aug 9, 2020 08:27

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

I wonder what kind of setup he has

# ¿ Aug 9, 2020 17:30

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

ArbitraryC posted:

In a date context I can guarantee you no service staff is gonna think someone's a child when their date orders everything for the table, that is in fact a pretty normal dynamic.

Sure, grandpa. Are you also uncomfortable that women get menus with prices on them these days?

# ¿ Aug 10, 2020 08:00

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

PetraCore posted:

My first joking thought was that he's working on 3d models of big titty elves, but honestly even if he's just rendering a building or whatever the clear problem is that he can't spent even half an hour with his wife without seething in resentment. He could be working on a perfect model of pre-fire Notre Dame and he'd be the rear end in a top hat.

Sounds like neither of them wants to compromise. She wants to serve dinner on the dot at 7 every day, but when he gets out of it once he ends up skipping their family dinner for a week straight. A functioning couple could find a middle ground.

# ¿ Aug 12, 2020 04:11

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Straight White Shark posted:

NTA for enforcing the same rules on family members as on other employees but definitely TA for having the rule in the first place.

Yup, just idiots all around. The owner for nonsense rules in his fiefdom (that all the employees are doubtlessly laughing at him about), and the stepdad and mom assuming that age entitles him to respect and special treatment.

# ¿ Aug 12, 2020 21:29

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Tarkus posted:

Hmmm, maybe it's an Alberta thing. We are looser with social conventions here despite being more conservative than most places. Probably also a blue collar thing, though even the white collar work I do now I always talk to the CEO's with their first name. Cultural I guess.

Nah, this is just standard corporate norms at this point even in the US. For entry-level employees there's almost a trope to their initial interaction where they call an executive by their last name and they laugh it off and insist on first names. Anyone older than that and it's just first names all around these days, including around vendors. The owner in the story definitely has a stick up his rear end.

# ¿ Aug 12, 2020 23:24

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Hirayuki posted:

I Got Mad and Flushed My Wife�s Birth Control

General husband terribleness aside, what exactly was his plan here? She sees the birth control is gone and suddenly decides it's more of a hassle to go to the pharmacy than it is to gestate and raise a child?

# ¿ Aug 13, 2020 14:52

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

MightyJoe36 posted:

This guy needs to get together with Scarf dude and/or Shawl dude.

What really made it was that shawl guy - whose girlfriend left him for being too effeminate - used to be some sort of special forces soldier.

Maggie Fletcher posted:

Nah, not really, people currently get really nasty at people who get elective cosmetic surgery or derm treatments. Injectables and implants are frowned upon even where I live, which is a pretty superficial area. Most of the world is not like LA.

It's super fun sitting among a group of your coworkers and having them rail on "frozen botox-faced bitches" and saying, "wait, do I look frozen?" and watching it slowly dawn on them.

Good cosmetic surgery generally isn't noticeable, it's pointed out as a negative when that isn't the case because it looks artificial.

# ¿ Aug 14, 2020 03:43

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Having a backyard overlooked by other peoples' second story windows is a pretty big negative that doesn't get called out as often as it should when looking at houses.

# ¿ Aug 15, 2020 20:04

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

AITA for punishing my son after he said something racist?

quote:

About a week ago, my (39F) family ordered Chinese food for delivery. When the delivery driver came to the door, my daughter (16F) was taking the cat upstairs to put in her room because he always tries to eat the food. My son (13M) loudly says, �Make sure the hide the cat from the Chinese guy!� as I am at the door getting the food from the Chinese delivery driver. He very obviously heard what my son said and was upset by it. I quickly apologized and took the food.

I told my son that racist jokes were completely unacceptable and very wrong and he refused to admit that he was in the wrong. So, later that night I forced my son to write a sincere apology to the delivery driver, (his name was on the receipt) as well as write a one page paper on Chinese culture and a one page paper on why racism is perpetuated by racist jokes and stereotypes. Then the next day I took him to the restaurant and had him read his apology aloud to the delivery driver as well as give him the papers he wrote. The driver was very appreciative of the apology and thanked me for making my son do it. He then told my son about multiple instances where he had faced racist comments and attacks from people while he was a delivery driver.

That night my husband (43M) and I got into an argument about me making our son do this. He told me that it was embarrassing for our son to have to do the apology and that the �punishment didn�t fit the crime�. I told him that it was much more embarrassing for the driver to have to face that kind of racism and racist stereotypes and that our son would get over the embarrassment. I do not condone any kind of hateful thinking in my house, and the fact that my son said that embarrassed me as well. My husband told me that it was �just a joke� and it wasn�t that big of a deal. I feel like I might have over reacted some but I think it�s important to help my son understand how what he said was wrong and hurtful.

Obvious NTA from the story aside, it sounds like the son probably picked it up from his dad and the only surprising thing is that this was unexpected for her.

# ¿ Aug 16, 2020 00:52

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Sagebrush posted:

yeah there's this new thing where you get naked for your partner when they aren't expecting it. it's pretty new and trendy so i wouldn't be surprised if you 30 year old BOOMERS haven't heard of it yet

More specifically, they surprise their partner naked and film the reaction for social media.

# ¿ Aug 18, 2020 02:26

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 22:21

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

ArbitraryC posted:

Of course she is also TA for wanting them immediately sold, presumably that guy was collecting them from before the relationship so it's really not her business how much they could be worth.

Married couples should have an honest accounting of each others' finances under most circumstances. He shouldn't have been hiding it.

But yeah, jumping to demanding he sell the cards is a dick move as well.

# ¿ Aug 18, 2020 03:31

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

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