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Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


So triwizard cup portkey stuff. Portkeys were heavily regulated by the ministry and you have to be licensed to make them as well as get approval for them and register them. It is harder than apparition to create them but it is never said how much harder.

Dumbledore is licensed but an added twist is that you cannot use a portkey to get to the Hogwarts grounds or use one on the grounds (say, to leave), similar to other forms of travel... unless the Headmaster specifically creates one and grants an exception. Hogwarts is sometimes connected to the floo network but this is guarded and watched by the ministry and Hogwarts staff. I guess it was supposed to see use as a telephone-type system but that only comes up a few times. It is possible to bypass the restrictions and call into Hogwarts but it is extremely risky to try.

It is never stated if the ministry has a way of tracking unlicensed portkeys but tracking anything on the Hogwarts grounds is difficult unless you have an eye witness.

Dumbledore turned the triwizard cup into a portkey to transport whomever touched it to the beginning of the maze. Barty Crouch jr. merely added a stopover in the graveyard in Little Hangleton but did not create the portkey himself because he would have been unable to do so. This also explains why it worked to transport Harry back to the beginning of the maze. It registered a stopover then a transport to the original destination.

Almost none of this is stated in the text explicitly, though it should have been. Much is implied but the magic system is so obtuse who even knows.

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Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


He, Hermione and Ron were the only ones who knew about the horcruxes. Dumbledore died and thus could not search. Explicit clues were out because the ministry and thus Voldemort et al could find out. Only one Horcrux was at Hogwarts. Voldemort was gaining power quickly. His supporters were infiltrating everywhere and imperiusing those in power or killing others.

The trio needed to move and find the macguffins or they would be stuck doing nothing.

Also Hogwarts came under Voldemort's control during the summer and there was no Dumbledore to protect Harry.

I will say what pisses me off about the movies is their portrayal of Dumbledore and Voldemort. In the fight scene at the ministry in book 5, Dumbledore schools Riddle, while protecting Harry and while holding Lestrange at bay. Just spanks him. Riddle is terrified. In the movie Voldemort wins somehow and is looks like a sad penis.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


MikeJF posted:

No I mean it makes no sense he went home for the vacation between sixth year and seventh year, when the protection dropped halfway through. They should've just kept him inside hogwarts and let the family protection fail, much safer than a mid-holiday extraction.


Gotcha.

Dumbledore wanted Harry to return to Privet Drive one more time. My theory is he probably didn't want to risk the ministry being taken before Harry's birthday and also have Harry be in an unsafe location like the Burrow or Hogwarts. The ministry entered the Burrow no problem despite protections from The Order and Hogwarts was taken over almost immediately after.

At Privet Drive Harry was guaranteed safe until the 31st of July even if the ministry fell and then he could apparate the gently caress out immediately. Furthermore, part of Dumbeldore's plan was to use Snape to feed the real info about Harry's departure to solidify his usefulness and "loyalty" and thus continue to act as a double agent, able to execute necessary parts of the plan as Headmaster of Hogwarts (his reward). Same with why Dumbledore wanted Snape to kill him (also to spare Malfoy's soul).

Dumbledore risked half the Order just to give Snape a real chance of giving the sword to Harry and friends, get Harry close to Voldemort so the soul fragment could be destroyed AND Snape's last job was to take out the snek. He failed the last one and the kid he bullied relentlessly chopped it's head off.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


The new movies are bad save Depp's performance.

Apparently Minerva Mcgonagall, born 1935, is working at Hogwarts as a professor in the lead-up to 1945. Magic.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Snape was jealous, abusive and disgusting. He was not a good teacher, even if he was good at potions (a lot of the skill for which he got from his mom) and DADA. He saw his mom as weak, even if she was preferable to his abusive muggle dad who also made him embrace only his magic side.

He fell for the evil, bigoted cult hook, line and sinker and gave information he likely knew would kill his crush's family and his crush (she was muggle-born) just because he was deluding himself about Voldemort caring at all about his followers and that Lily was deluding herself about James.

Then, he completely confused James with Harry, transferring all that he hated and was jealous of to Harry just for the purpose of petty vengeance. Harry definitely was above-average but with adhd and anger issues because of abuse but was not much like his father was as a kid, more like his mother or a hybrid. Snape proceeded to physically and emotionally torture Harry and Neville. Snape bullied almost all of his students that weren't Slytherins mercilessly and even some of them.

James (also Sirius) was an rear end as a kid and Harry probably related more to Snape than anyone else in the story as far as upbringings go but Snape could never look past his own jealousy and humiliation at the hands of the duo, nor his indoctrination. Particularly during Occlumency lessons in book 5, he saw that Harry, far from being like James at that age, had suffered similarly at the hands Aunt Petunia, Uncle Vernon, "Aunt" Marge and especially Dudley. Snape could have related, understood, cared. But he didn't. He only cared at all because Lily and that wasn't enough to make him realize he might be around a kindred spirit and not his Bitter Bi Rival or school enemy. At least not consciously.

(To be fair, Harry never tried to bridge the gap, either, after learning about how Snape had it but then he was 15. Not an adult and not in the position of power, plus had 4.5 years of being hated for a reason outside his control and understanding.)

All Snape wanted was revenge for "stealing" his girl and making him look like a fool (for which he paid James back many times according to Lupin) and not being recognized as the best student in the class. Snape had to work for it, god forbid, whereas James, Sirius and even Lily had slightly more talent and aptitude (except quidditch with James). Sure, join the fascist cult that says your angst is justification for murder and your muggle-born best friend/love of your life is an abomination.

That'll show'em.

Cranappleberry fucked around with this message at 05:27 on Oct 12, 2020

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


SlothfulCobra posted:

Harry was an aggressively average student who benefited from extra attention from teachers, and Snape's failings as a teacher make him an average English boarding school teacher so far as I understand, at least for the era of schooling that Hogwarts is supposed to evoke. (An era that sucked)

His backstory is dumb, but it's not like any of the other professors seem to have a real personal life outside of their jobs.

Harry was a better than average student if his O.W.L. scores are anything to go on. However, he definitely had focus and anger issues that impeded his learning (likely due to abuse). Anything that was not practical in his hijinks was secondary or even tertiary. Obviously, he benefitted from Hermione's notes, corrections and influence, which carried him and Ron academically but O.W.L.S. were all him when it came down to the tests themselves. The only core classes he did poorly in were History of Magic (duh) and Astronomy where he got an "A" but only because Hagrid's arrest interrupted the test.

Not saying he was a brilliant student, he was good on talent but got distracted easily and there was a lot to distract him. N.E.W.T. level was another story. At that point focus, knowledge amd control became paramount and probably would have weeded him out.

For going with his gut or on-the-fly tactics or leadership he did well (according to the story). However, he lead with his emotions and that was often silly and exploitable.

Cranappleberry fucked around with this message at 05:40 on Oct 12, 2020

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


I always noticed the word "shrill" is only ever used by Rowling when referring to women, and of those times nearly all of them describe Hermione's voice when she gets frustrated. I think there are only two or three examples in which it describes someone else's voice, such as Petunia's.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


I always took the books' version of arithmancy to mean more than divining the future with numbers. Part of arithmancy, for example, was figuring out that 7 was the most magically powerful number. Most of it is probably regular high school and college math and number theory but with magic. Also Calculators from FFT.

Ancient ruins is translating dead written magical languages. The runes, when used properly, might have intrinsic magical power themselves. Allegedly the Pensieve, which is just a stone basin but is etched in runes, was found in the area where the castle of Hogwarts was built.

Most of the hacks probably come from a combination of disciplines. Like using potions, alchemy and transfiguration to make yourself permanently and more intrinsically powerful/smart/whatever, or charming and transfiguring or otherwise creating objects to make them into artifacts like the Hallows or Deluminator or Founders' objects. The other hacks seem to be researching obscure and difficult magic like wandlore, spell creation, whatever materials science is (probably alchemy). Then there is disciplining yourself to use actually use such things like with occlumency, sensing "known" magic, nonverbal magic or even magic without a wand (not as powerful but still works). Making less noise or light effect while using magic is also something that might be learned as Dumbledore can disapparate with a pop or no noise at all whereas it is usually a loud crack. There are other examples.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Edgar Allen Ho posted:

Weird that Hogwarts has no classes that teach interdisciplinary magic.

alchemy is taught in 6th and 7th years if enough students show interest. Only Draco Malfoy cared enough.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


ahahahahaha the title

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Ron and Hermione are definitely getting divorced

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


slughorn at least dueled voldemort and was almost killed along with Sexiest Auror/MoM Kingsley Shacklebolt and Professor "I'm my own grandmother" mcgonagall. Like snape, wanted to avenge Lily and repair the damage he had done but was obviously afraid to confront Riddle. He clearly wanted to avoid direct confrontation but was also disappointed all the Slytherin kids up and walked out on Hogwarts so he did what he could, which was call in all his favors and contacts. Not saying he is a good guy or a hero but he was more in line with what to expect from the average Slytherin before Riddle.

Tons of non-slytherin kids were assholes and bullies. As mentioned by others, most people bullied Neville (including teachers) and Luna except Ginny and Hermione. Zacharias Smith was a dick to everyone. The Slytherins were Hitler Youth because of their parents being the highest ranking nazi party members that were in families known for inbreeding and racism. Most lived lives of privilege and freedom from consequences, as well, except the people on the margins like Greyback and other icky people who they only associated with because they needed thugs. Snape perpetuated this privilege while abusing basically everyone else so that didn't help.

Plenty of Slytherins or people from pureblood families outside the Weasleys and Potters turned out fine, though. Obviously there was streaks of racism, inbreeding and so on but most were happy to keep it as systemic oppression rather than outright enslavement/imprisonment of muggleborns. They already had slaves to kick around and excellent accountants to treat like crap (whole other can of worms with that). Plenty, like The Blacks, balked at the extremes Riddle and Grindelwald were willing to go to.

Ironically, Umbridge was actually hated even by the other Slytherins of her time in school because of her extreme ambition, her cloying attitude/sucking up, devotion to authority and bureaucratic nonsense. Rather like Hermione in the beginning and Percy before he comes to his senses. Oh and her lack of pureblood credentials.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Draco is acting in desperation because he and his family are under constant threat due to Lucius's mistakes and his own failure to kill Dumbledore. Also he's being used as a torturer despite being disgusted by it. After Dumbledore died he probably lost all hope of Voldemort being defeated so he saw an opportunity and went after it, thinking his thuggish cronies would back him up.

He does learn a couple of lessons throughout the story but she does not do a good job of portraying his personality changes except for said desperation and horror.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


*stares blankly into the middle distance while wearing a half-mad smile*

oh yes I'd love some tea

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


everybody agrees Luna is the best character and should appear in every franchise since apparently time is no obstacle

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Edgar Allen Ho posted:

1. Kreacher
2. Dobby
3. Luna
4. Snape
5. Viktor Krum

*looks surly from behind a bookshelf*

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


yea the issue with transfiguration and food and even other stuff is- clearly stuff can be changed, duplicated or increased but doesn't necessarily remain so except when it does. So maybe they just grow some food and then duplicate it permanently. Maybe you need more skill or special artifacts (like a philosopher's stone) to make the change permanent or change certain materials like gold? Who knows. It's fine to not explain every detail or rule of a system but there are so many contradictions that saying there is a system besides author says so is silly.

like what the h*ck are the rules for reflecting spells off a surface? sometimes the reflective surface is scorched or shatters or cracks and sometimes it reflects pewpew. can you send intangible spells through materials or ignore them completely? what about teleporting a stunning spell behind someone? why didn't Dumbledore use wandless magic to defend himself because we know wandless magic works, it's just not as focused or powerful. Where does the sun go at night? is it mad at me?

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Harry was outside the house and the ministry knows both his general and specific location. He was likely being tracked by the ministry when he left his home, just as he was being tracked by the Order.

This is one of those things that goes partially unexplained in the text, but the protection works against Voldemort (or possibly one of his agents). So once the ministry or people in it were under his control, they were left to wait it out. OR it was that Voldemort was so singularly obsessed with killing Harry himself, he was unwilling to let him be arrested or otherwise captured/killed and so decided to wait while making it difficult for Harry to leave easily.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


^yea that's a good explanation. He kept making his bond with Harry ever-deeper, essentially making the prophecy self-fulfilling when it didn't have to matter at all.

It was Voldemort's hubris about love and also killing being the ultimate power that makes him lose. He underestimates Snape's love and assumes automatically that killing is necessary to transfer power of a magical artifact. He sacrifices a powerful, helpful ally and goes to his doom because he can't fathom that love is a thing, that trust matters, that Snape's help is not just about power and he can do everything important himself, anyway (oh except get a body back and a billion other things).

It also plays into his fear of death. To him, death is ignominy and total destruction so why would you ever stun or disarm when you could kill? He's sort of objectivist and thinks deep-down everyone either thinks like him and just denies it or is weak. Of course the Elder Wand could only be transferred by killing and the wizard who made it would definitely have made it that way or else it would not be worth possessing.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Tom Riddle falls in love, gets the person with Harry's help and finds the strength to feel regret and repair his soul.

Sir Cadogan and Dumbledore (from their portraits) begin dating.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Radcliffe was still drunk from the night before in a lot of scenes. He turned out to be a decent actor, tho.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


totally agree on the rules for the magic system making zero sense except "does a thing I, the author, need it to." A soft system where not much is explained can work well but once you start breaking rules, it's lazy writing. The killing curse could have been handled way better and the idea it is extraordinarily difficult (and not turning it into a gun) is an interesting one. It is explained in book 4 that its supposed to be hard to actually kill someone with it and the supposed intent of magic mattered as much as magical power. Horcruxes were special in that they can never be used without a selfish reason whereas the killing curse could technically be used to put someone out of their misery but I can't think of anything for torture and total mind control. You have to want to kill your enemy or make them feel pain, it's not enough to just feel angry. A powerful enough "explosion" spell acts like a bomb and can kill and maim multiple people whereas the killing curse has to be personally acting to take a life.

The argument from the other side is similar to guns- what makes them dangerous in the hands of idiots or people who misuse them is that they are so accessible. You don't need to know how the physics of how a gun worksto know "point and squeeze trigger thing dies" but then you'd get a bunch of Cormac Mclaggens killing people because they didn't make the quidditch team or whatever. ANY consistency would have been nice.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


you have a lovely avatar that makes me nostalgic

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


the entire year was half propaganda and/or spells way too complex for the students to work, plus plenty of students had to stop going to class during the rebellion anyway and then many died anyway. It was scrubbed. So all-in-all a typical Hogwarts year.

Harry, Neville and Ron didn't have to take NEWTs. but they still had to pass auror training tests after 3 more years of study.

Hermione went back, did the NEWTs, joined the law enforcement branch, section for non-human sentient lifeforms or whatever and fought for elf, goblin, centaur and merfolk rights before becoming Ron and Harry's boss as the chief law enforcement officer person.

I still don't see how this system works. Does the wizengamot vote to confirm people other than minister of magic? Or is it just the minister appointing people? like what

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Showing up to work is for the plebs like Arthur Weasley. If he had generational wealth he'd be tinkering with plugs and batteries all day.

Most high level ministry people walk around, checking their ridiculous pocket watches while trying look important and accepting various bribes and favors from other inbred family leaders. Then its giving favorable interviews to the papers about reducing the tax on snargaluff pods. Midmorning tea. Expedient vote to jail some innocent house elf for eternity in sadness hell, vigorous debate and then vote to reduce the tax on snargaluff pods because they were bribed to do so, then knocking off the rest of the afternoon for whatever the wizard version of golf is.

They were all atwitter with much aghast groaning when a "shrill" young woman made them get up and do stuff and started talking about "rights" and "corruption"

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Harry definitely wants to share his wealth but knows Molly and Arthur will never take it. Something in Chamber of Secrets where he feels bad they are scraping the corners of their vault and tries to hide his own wealth and then wishes he could split it with them.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Moaning Myrtle is actually a hero. Everything would have been solved by diplomacy and talking it out if Harry hadn't interrupted her comforting Malfoy.

In the alternative timeline, Harry is depressed accountant who has nightmares about his abusive childhood. Instead, Malfoy is convinced of the error of his ways by Myrtle and they become the first ghost/human romance in history. Myrtle, now happy she has someone that likes and loves her, ascends to the afterlife. Draco is left with a bittersweet melancholy yet he is determined to live his life to the fullest and wait until his natural death to see her again.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009



Lily was definitely the more focused and upstanding of Harry's parents. Harry got his more adventurous, hotheaded and lazy side from his dad (that and his abuse) if such thing are carried in wizard genes, idfk since quidditch somehow is.

James and his family were so fanatically anti-pureblood supremacy and dark magic that the remaining pureblood families (excluding the Weasleys) got together and kicked his family out of the sacred 29. They were considered more uncouth than the Weasleys. James and his family hated anyone associated with pureblood supremacy and dark magic such that they and he hated anyone associated with Slytherin (the origin of the pureblood nonsense at Hoggy Warty Hogwarts) including nearly Sirius as his whole family was Slytherins and Snape automatically after he was selected for Slytherin (also because he was best friends with Lily).

James was absolutely a shallow ponce but Snape was a "nice guy" who never revealed his feelings just assuming Lily would want him when she saw their relationship as friendship. He was deeply resentful of James and Sirius because he never got credit for his talent and studious attitudes outside his House (most of which was his recruitment for the Death Eaters by older students like Malfoy). Plus he totally followed all the rules! He was absolutely headhunted by the Death Eaters and his "friends" were far worse than James and Sirius, outright torturing and terrifying muggleborns while in school. This further drove James and Sirius to target him. He also made excuses for his torturing and murdering friends and after school was totally down for helping them as much as possible right up until Voldemort killed Lily. Only after it affected him did it matter.

Cranappleberry fucked around with this message at 00:02 on Apr 18, 2021

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Edgar Allen Ho posted:

It also definitely has a Voldemort pensieve scene where he asks Dumbledore* to be Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher and smuggle the tiara horcrux into the Room of Requirement, and Harry very deliberately comments on how hot Tom Riddle has become even though he's even skinnier and snakier-looking than he was before.

This isn't correct, he mentions how Tom's features have become melted and distorted like candlewax and that dude in Sunshine who was blurred by constant exposure to heavy gravity and intense light of the Sun.

NikkolasKing posted:

Bellatrix was quite lovely and got a description of said loveliness but they both ended up pretty permanently ugly from years of hell prison.

Harry has a bordering-on-morbid fascination with Bellatrix. He comments on her beauty almost to the point of being attracted to her as well as attracted to her intensity, poise and talent.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


^maybe who she fantasizes being^

NikkolasKing posted:

Harry actually mentally criticizes Dumbledore for being overly trusting of lil' Tom. So I'm not sure which opinion we're supposed to support here.

My read has always been Tom was destined to be pure evil but I've had friends since the beginning who had the opposite read and it wasn't fated. It would go against the spirit of the books for it to be fated, to be sure.


Welcome new poster. Do you actually like Harry Potter? It's a topic that comes up surprisingly rarely in this here Harry potter thread.

I got like 20 posts in this thread and I think one or two of the (many) thread titles were stuff I fakeposted.

I liked it when I was a kid and I recently did a re-read in order to do a "death of the author" analysis. I don't think it should be regarded as anymore than what it is- decent popular fiction for children to teens that lacks a lot of internal logical consistency, has a lot of problematic stuff due to the author herself projecting into the story and a poorly thought-out, tacked-on ending.

I hate the epilogue and most of the EU stuff Rowling added later on. Also, Cursed Child not canon.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Edgar Allen Ho posted:

And some of the parts everyone complains about can’t really be redeemed, like “lol better smash all the time turners”

yea this is the whole lacking internal logical consistency thing.

Example:
We know Bill, Percy and Barty Jr. got 12 OWLs. How? Did they study a bit and just go for a passing mark on the test? Or were they actually required to attend the classes? If so, did they all get time turners? Or did the staff randomly decide to run classes concurrently one year? Did they use the time turners to sleep, unlike super clever Hermione? How do you even get a decent OWL grade in Divination?

I lie awake at night pondering the Great Questions of Our Time.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


That's a pretty good head-canon explanation.

The problem is that it's head-canon.

I suppose even the good ol' wizards wouldn't want a time turner in the hands of an up-and-coming youth unless they knew said youth never broke a rule ever. But even then I doubt they'd allow it even if they had all sorts of informants tracking the usage and put pressure on Dumbledore (who would give no shits) to keep said youth in line.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


rule of cool is one thing but gaping holes that you fill in with ~magic~ or nothing is another.

Arthur Weasley was cited one too many times for 'inappropriate actions' during what muggles call films (like pictures but with stories).

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Edgar Allen Ho posted:

Arthur was on the ground in wizard cop raids on Malfoy Manor. Perhaps the only good kind of wizard cop out of the million kinds

So maybe he can't figure out how a plug and socket work, fine, dude was doing combat rolls into the nazi manor. He sounds like a cool dude. I stan Arthur Weasley.

e: and after a hard long night of blasting the nazis he shows up at breakfast and is nothing but loving and supportive of his many children, biological and adopted.

he's a good dad, just overworked and peculiar.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Fred and George look on Harry as more of a rule-breaker buddy. He's their protege because he routinely flouts authority whereas Ron is the sidekick and lacks confidence and Ginny is a girl. Merlin forfend they get their little sister into trouble.

Also, yea Harry has an immediate need for it.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


at first she gets drunk because she feels the pressure from The Most Noble and Illustrious High Inquisitor, Dolores Umbridge, who is openly saying she is a fraud. Then, she continues to drink because she has to split classes with Firenze (who is a legit good teacher of Divination and should prolly set the standard for O.W.L./N.E.W.T.) and this is somehow a grave insult even though she is burdened, yes burdened, with The Terrible Weight of Dreadful Portents. She must warn Dumbledore. He Must be Told. The cards, the embers, the chicken poo poo! They all foretell DEATH!!!!

Firenze, of course, recognized Voldemort was coming back in book 1 while Trelawney said it was a silly impossibility at the end of book 3.

Her "predictions" come true because of lucky guesswork. They aren't legit, she is just erring on the side of nebulous bad things happening in a school where being eaten by a giant snek is a real risk and then oh yea during open war.

Dumbledore, polite though I'm sure he was, definitely told her "yea I know we're all in grave danger. Go home, Sybill. You're drunk."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Unrelated, but why is there barely any pathos and catharsis between Harry and Snape?

"Hey I was abused growing up, too. You can actually see in my mind what it was like. It sucks."
"Hey what my dad did to you wasn't cool! I'm sorry you went through that because of him."

"Yea I got the spell I used out this book. I didn't know what it did. I'm sorry I hurt Draco."
"This is MY book Potter."
"It's been really useful, except that one horrible spell. This is the kind of teacher I've needed."

Though Snape would probably just confiscate it and give Harry detention. Or, since Snape is the adult, maybe anything except blind hatred? I get he is emotionally broken and all but if he is so committed to protecting Lily's child surely he would grow ANY connection with Harry. Or even look at Harry with conflicting emotions. Nope just gotta be all hate all the time, both sides.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Snape's only real use to either side is as a spy and his knowledge. Snape was the perfect spy in that he was able to both shield his thoughts and sell lies perfectly to anyone trying to read him.

He is no threat to Voldemort either in power or popularity- most death eaters hate him for various reasons and it's Bellatrix and Lucius who are Voldemort's favorite pets up until they screw up enough at which point Snape gets the job. Snape is capable of doing things on his own, with minimal and difficult orders, which is probably why Voldemort "likes" him and since Voldemort doesn't see love as important, no way Voldemort would ever see Snape's love for Lily as anything that mattered. Also, no way Snape matched Voldemort in power. Remember Pettigrew and later the incest twins were there to spy on Snape for Voldemort and also deal with the day-to-day while Snape was busy on vague but more important missions.

The good guys hate Snape, too, for being an rear end in a top hat, for possibly being a spy for Voldemort and then for killing Dumbledore. No way Snape would obtain real power or love with either side if Voldemort were defeated and Snape somehow lived. The only reason anyone respected Snape was his power and knowledge and the fact that the top guys on both sides vouched for him.

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


oh hell yea we get to talk about Vernon Dursley. Mr. Dursley was the director of a firm called Grunnings, which made drills. He was a big, beefy man with hardly any neck, although he did have a very large mustache.

lmbo

Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


*extremely purple and breathing like a winded rhinoceros*

YOU COME BACK HERE AND SET HER RIGHT!!!

*like Matt from digimon when he gets all badass and evil*

"No Vernon. She deserves what she got.

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Cranappleberry
Jan 27, 2009


Diddy Dinky Diddydums x Hermione Granger?!

D^3, Infamous Harry "Dumbledore's Special Boy" Potter's cousin, learns tolerance and then respect from his wickedly ravishing gf, Minister of Magic Granger, writes Rita Skeeter Special Correspondent.

"He gave the old one-two to Dejemntors... I guess" says his once proud now horrified father, Vernon Dursely aged 61, who looks as though he is struggling to find answers to justify this cruel world in which we all have to suffer.

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