|
josh04 posted:Classic marauder's prank, load your wand up with "spawn 500 flying dicks" spells then ask Snape to check the log. Is there scripting for wands? Can they do batch spells? Can I program a skeleton computer to do magic?
|
#
¿
Dec 11, 2020 00:38
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ Apr 26, 2024 15:40 |
|
|
the whole Slytherin Problem could be more interesting and complex if there were a fifth house to spread out the negative traits. There could be one house that is ambitious and cut-throat but not racist, and another that is the old-money racist pricks who are just mediocre at everything else. A fifth house would also mix up the inherent two-tiered house rivalries in favor of something more ring-like (e.g., rock-paper-scissors-lizard-spock). The fifth house would be called Scharffenberger and its animal would be the elephant seal.
|
|
#
¿
Dec 18, 2020 08:05
|
|
|
Taotipper posted:So since wizards seem to be unaware of like the last 50 years of muggle science, I guess they must not have access to the pill? What does wizard birth control look like? Probably you drink some potion that stops you from becoming pregnant but if it's mixed wrong it can turn you into a baby, probably? Wizards haven't discovered sex yet. They know of it in theory but are confounded by the mechanics. They reproduce by stealing muggle babies and making them into changelings.
|
|
#
¿
Dec 21, 2020 08:36
|
|
|
Zesty posted:Whoever installed that bathroom in the past hundred years had to account for a secret passageway into the chamber of secrets. They were originally servants' tunnels, but when they added the bathrooms they thought "why add separate pipes when we can just make the house elves wade through sewage?"
|
|
#
¿
Jan 10, 2021 19:27
|
|
|
Dumbledore will pressure whats-his-face animal collector guy into killing his own friends and that one love interest lady to save wizard society or something, then animal guy will swear off magic and animals and brood for the rest of his life because what even is this series about anymore aurgggggh (Hedwig's Theme fades in)
|
|
#
¿
Jan 15, 2021 06:38
|
|
|
amigolupus posted:Between how Hagrid and Sirius gets treated, you really get the feel that Rowling doesn't believe in criminals, even wrongly accused ones, being able to rehabilitate and reintegrate back into proper society. That may very well be, but it also illustrates the reality that society goes out of its way to make it more difficult.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 14, 2021 16:45
|
|
|
I kinda feel like wizards would feel at home in jodhpurs.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 17, 2021 09:15
|
|
|
House elves are the equivalent of animals that want to be eaten, only instead of satire they were played straight for some reason. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bAF35dekiAY&t=73s
|
|
#
¿
Feb 18, 2021 04:56
|
|
|
Edgar Allen Ho posted:There’s a russian Harry Potter knockoff where the girl wizard flies on a double bass instead of a broom That's loving awesome
|
|
#
¿
Feb 22, 2021 05:14
|
|
|
Dark Harry uses a flying mobility scooter.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 23, 2021 07:05
|
|
|
Wizards don't care about the arbitrary political boundaries of muggle governments any more than pet owners respect the territorial markers left by their pets.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 7, 2021 18:58
|
|
|
Edgar Allen Ho posted:running plot point of Ron's wand sucking because the willow broke it It would be awesome if the whomping willow had a wand of its own.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 10, 2021 23:04
|
|
|
I imagine (because I don't care enough to look it up) that there were periods of history where becoming a ghost was the fashionable thing to do, and periods when it was considered gauche.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 25, 2021 17:40
|
|
|
rollick posted:Is heaven real for everyone or just wizards? I can't remember religion ever coming up in the series, except hearing there was at least one Jewish pupil maybe? There's the monk ghost who's the patron ghost of hufflepuff. There's also one mention of a church in the 7th book when the kids visit the graveyard during Christmas.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 25, 2021 20:52
|
|
|
Sydin posted:Just absolutely jacked shirtless Neville, mid-stroke cutting off the snake's head, blood gushing everywhere, Hermione and Ron behind him backed up against a wall in pure shock and awe, Voldemort on his knees screaming in the foreground, the castle on fire in the background, pouring rain, with a thunderbolt striking the high tower in the distance: the greatest album cover that never was. I think there's a spell that paints your most epic moment on the side of a van.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 26, 2021 03:50
|
|
|
Turning my house into a horcrux so the siding won't wear out.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 26, 2021 23:44
|
|
|
Asgerd posted:We can only guess at how many house-elves they threw into that thing to test it I'm surprised this isn't some sort of wizarding league sport.
|
|
#
¿
May 3, 2021 23:41
|
|
|
Jazerus posted:i'm the guy who ordered a book called magicke most evile for the school library On the shelf next to it was Magicke Most Revile, a book that berates you with a steam of profane insults if you try to read it.
|
|
#
¿
May 11, 2021 00:28
|
|
|
W.T. Fits posted:Does Lucius even work for the Ministry? I always assumed he was just idle rich old money with no day job who has nothing better to do with his time than make life difficult for people who aren't nazis. I think he was on the school board
|
|
#
¿
Jun 18, 2021 18:24
|
|
|
I thought we were fantasizing about being the cool-rear end professor who all the students respect because we teach them awesome poo poo, and we get to live in a giant castle instead of a studio apartment. Also the headmaster can just hire you on a whim instead of you having to get a masters degree and maintain certification. (I know, being a teacher still is still hell in the wizard world)
|
|
#
¿
Jun 26, 2021 22:05
|
|
|
I got silicosis from all the exploding wizards
|
|
#
¿
Aug 14, 2021 01:49
|
|
|
What about broom rodeo? Taming wild brooms, flying a broom steeplechase, broom dressage, etc.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 17, 2021 02:32
|
|
|
Ghost Leviathan posted:The idea that before indoor plumbing wizards just magiced away their poo poo seems even dumber considering chamber pots are actively mentioned Before the modern point system, the house cup used to be awarded to whichever house marked the most territory.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 25, 2021 22:16
|
|
|
Ror posted:I don’t know if you guys know this but her hair is bushy! *clutches pearls*
|
|
#
¿
Aug 26, 2021 05:15
|
|
|
Edgar Allen Ho posted:What would Voldemort do if that dragon just ate Harry Being eaten by a dragon isn't on the list of things that can destroy a horcrux, therefore Harry would just pass through intact and alive.
|
|
#
¿
Sep 3, 2021 08:08
|
|
|
The Secret of Dumbledore isn't about Albus; it's about what his brother did with that goat.
|
|
#
¿
Sep 23, 2021 03:30
|
|
|
I know a lot of the criticisms of Hogwarts boil down to "...just like an actual British boarding school", and this is also true of other magical boarding school stories like The Worst Witch, but it's still kind of bizarre to me that the pervasive abuse is just assumed to be there, neither whitewashed away nor addressed as a systemic problem. It's just incidental. It's just part of the setting of a children's story in the same way that gravity is. Just, of course children are going to be abused and traumatized and have their lives threatened, why would that not be the case? Granted the school almost gets shut down in book 2, but that's due to a monster, not staff. Even when parents do threaten to pull their kids out of school, it's due to bigotry against a professor, or some sort of power play against Dumbledore, rather than concern over abuse. Is there even any fallout for the school after a popular kid dies in book 4? I don't really have a specific point other than how cognitively dissonant it seems. It would be like that children's book about George Washington's slaves baking him a birthday cake, but also including bits where the slaves are beaten and raped and forcibly separated from their families, but still intended to inspire children's playful imagination of wanting to be slaves on a plantation. It would be like Saved By The Bell, exactly the same except there's a school shooting in every episode that results in a character dying, but no one talks about it.
|
|
#
¿
Oct 10, 2021 17:44
|
|
|
Rudeboy Detective posted:Mild derail but I can't sit on this thought for any longer. I wonder if any Ministry employees tasked with studying Muggles lock onto some insanely specific corner of pop culture. Like the wizard equivalent of a western otaku, but they're way too into like star trek or metal. IIRC, the Hogwarts Express is technically in violation of some regulation because its a muggle technology, but everyone loved steam trains so much they just let it keep being used.
|
|
#
¿
Oct 11, 2021 19:02
|
|
|
Biscuitbeard posted:Apparently the Cursed Child clarifies the train was stolen from muggles in 1830, and had the same trolley witch selling onboard snacks for the entire 180+ years? Making her 200+ easily, which is impressive for someone whose entire job is selling junk food. That would have required the writers doing more than zero amounts of research, so can't have that. It would be hilarious if that witch is still selling the same 180 year old candy. Her cart is still full because no one ever buys any except the first years who don't know better. I want that to be canon.
|
|
#
¿
Oct 12, 2021 15:46
|
|
|
Ghost Leviathan posted:That just reminded me of the Goblet of Fire security spell giving the kids beards, would totally have a bunch of likely lads setting that off on purpose I would put in my cat's name to give it a beard. E: wait that's not how the spell worked. nevermind
|
|
#
¿
Oct 22, 2021 23:13
|
|
|
Sydin posted:Arthur showing up with a magnum and just blasting is a bit tonally out of place but I was always sad that his muggle obsession ended up just being a series-long joke. Like hey maybe have it so the weird magical radios that suddenly show up in the last book as a way for the resistance to communicate are being rigged up by Arthur who's applying magic to muggle radio tech! It's a small change that not only lets Arthur contribute meaningfully and brings his obsession full circle, but also further reinforces that wizarding prejudice against muggles is dumb and they could gain a lot by dropping it. Arthur shows up with a sack full of rubber ducks and starts hurling them at Deatheaters like a Muppet Rambo. Of course, they do nothing, and Arthur feels a sense of betrayal as he gets a face-full of green light.
|
|
#
¿
Dec 18, 2021 00:27
|
|
|
Dementors don't seem overly strong, physically, and can't phase through matter afaik, so it wouldn't take much to restrain them. If someone thought to do so. Ah well, nevertheless.
|
|
#
¿
Jan 13, 2022 00:31
|
|
|
BigglesSWE posted:Harry handed in his good dad-card when he named his son Albus Severus. I'm sure Ginny was absolutely thrilled with that choice.
|
|
#
¿
Jan 21, 2022 18:50
|
|
|
amigolupus posted:Come to think of it, is the ghost even getting paid for this, or is Dumbledore pocketing the guy's salary for himself? Because if not, then that's another magical being that Hogwarts is keeping around as a slave. Is any teacher at Hogwarts getting paid? They already get room and board, and the privilege of laboring at the Buttchocks fucked around with this message at 14:55 on Jan 31, 2022 |
|
#
¿
Jan 31, 2022 14:53
|
|
|
RoboChrist 9000 posted:Obviously they are still wrong but like my point is that Rowling wrote a story where the people claiming to be the master race actually loving are. Like you cannot make a story about how racism is bad when your story also includes the premise that one race is superior to another and where the main appeal of the story for its fans is how fun and cool it would be to be part of that master race. You wouldn't know wizards are superior based on their society. Superior ability doesn't mean anything if you just use it to be lovely in the same ways that muggles are.
|
|
#
¿
Jan 31, 2022 15:01
|
|
|
Cranappleberry posted:Robert Pattinson tried to hold his wand like he was wielding a gun in a Diehard because he thought holding it like I wand was "dorky" It kinda makes sense if you're worried about your wand getting knocked out of your hand. Of course, another way to prevent that would be a wand wrist-strap, which nobody seems to have thought of in the history of wizardom.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 12, 2022 08:25
|
|
|
Guy A. Person posted:Wizarding America invented what are effectively bayonets but with a wand strapped to the gun instead of a knife Do wands come in different calibers? Are there, like, rifle-sized wands? Is there a cannon equivalent of a wand? Mega-wand? Wizards have had plenty of wars; they should have advanced their war-magic technology much further than they have.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 12, 2022 17:37
|
|
|
I want JKR to retcon the California Redwoods into a wizard attempt to grow intercontinental ballistic wands.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 12, 2022 17:39
|
|
|
Maybe pre-charged wands are a thing? Someone's gotta cast minor healing once in a while, and you know Dumbledor can't be bothered.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 23, 2022 06:47
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ Apr 26, 2024 15:40 |
|
|
can't wait until she comes up with the triangle trade, but for magic.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 3, 2022 19:27
|
|