Shittiest piece of garbage tech in science fiction

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > The Sci-Fi Wi-Fi > Shittiest piece of garbage tech in science fiction

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

sean10mm posted:

It would have been smart to show maser tanks loving up some D list monster like that mantis prick or the big spider or whatever so it's more impressive for Godzilla to shrug them off, and humans look less stupid for making them.

But people constantly make pointless things that are more expensive less durable and less effective than their predecessor.

# ¿ Jul 13, 2021 20:20

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# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 01:44

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Sobatchja Morda posted:

--snip--
skynet
--snip--

Is there a novel from the PoV of skynet?

# ¿ Jan 26, 2022 14:52

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

dr_rat posted:

if the dinosaurs suddenly started getting into soap opera'esq romantic and family situations.

Which alas is a film we never got to see.

Not the mama!

# ¿ Jun 22, 2022 20:55

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

imperiusdamian posted:

Absoluute worst? Star Trek having NO loving surge protectors on the bridge. Seriously, consoles explode in showers of sparks every time someone glares at a Fed ship?

Well you see it's ughhhh quantum entangled power generation so there's no way since it just magically goes from generator to console. Why don't we put it into some buffer between decks then safely transport it to the console with a surge protector in the middle? You know that's a great question I have absolutely no idea if anything I said is accurate.

# ¿ Jul 19, 2022 13:35

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

The ships go on enough time adventures I'm surprise they don't universe hop every time they get struck as a function of shields

# ¿ Jul 19, 2022 19:38

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

SlothfulCobra posted:

The holodeck would've been fine if the writers had any self-control about the holodeck randomly overcoming all limits to keep unexpectedly creating a fully sentient holograms.

The holodeck should never allow anyone else instead before first filling with water and draining all the funk away. Why can other people just walk in on you?

# ¿ Jul 21, 2022 14:45

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Worf posted:

I don't think the holodeck is dumb they just had dumb people write bad poo poo with it

That first episode when they're in the ship corridor and then the bay door opens and it's a jungle is loving cool lol

If it was written today it'd probably be used better and have more stories about the detriments of using it too much as an individual or whatever a la broccoli

But tech fatigue etc would have been way less easy to empathize with in that way in 1987 compared to "wow a jungle / whatever inside the ship" or random malfunctions and hijinx

Orville uses their holodeck in a pretty good way. Mostly nightclubs and sex. Lots of gay sex.

# ¿ Jul 21, 2022 17:39

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

TNG seemed to have tried to use the holodeck as more a time machine and do a classic Doctor Who historical series. Only StarTrek isn't built for that at all and it's a silly use of the tech to Prime Directive a simulation.

# ¿ Jul 22, 2022 13:14

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Bloody Pom posted:

On the subject of the holodeck, I liked the VOY episode that revealed Tuvok had created a custom simulation where he could murder Neelix with impunity as a form of stress relief.

Honestly, I'd do the exact same thing in that situation.

This is the first thing I've heard about Voyager that makes me at all interested in watching it. Are you going to make me really keep watching after DS9? I have no idea who these characters are but this plot sounds different enough to be fun.

# ¿ Sep 2, 2022 18:46

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Schwarzwald posted:

Say what you want about that episode, people remembered it.

people also remember goatse

# ¿ Sep 6, 2022 14:13

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

CainFortea posted:

"The Vulcan Science Directorate has determined that time travel is impossible" - T'pol for like 4 seasons

Clearly every time Vulcan's got time travel they hosed poo poo up so someone else went back in time and made sure the vulcan's got the wrong idea about any time travel accidents and conclude it's impossible abusing their logic.

# ¿ Mar 17, 2023 16:41

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

EVIL Gibson posted:

There needs to be more creative warp tech.

Sword of the Stars has multiple races and each one has a unique FTL drive mechanic with my favorite being the Morrigi.

Their Voidcutter ship is the only type of ship that can warp. It uses an ungodly amount of energy to both continue cutting and pushing itself along.

The cool part is more ships can join in the FTL, including non-voidcutters, and the more ships join the less energy the FTL takes as they form a large V to distribute the energy more efficiently.

And if that doesn't make it obvious, the Morrigi are an avian race.

They are from the expansion "a murder of crows"

# ¿ Jun 28, 2023 20:08

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Splicer posted:

You've mixed up a couple of races. All the Morrigi ships have an FTL drive that technobabble technobabble gravimetric technobabble which also creates a gravity "bow wave" in spacetime behind the ship. Adding more ships to the fleet allows them to take advantage of the bow wave and speed up the fleet as a whole. So more ships = more fast. They also have a ship type that's just a huge gravity generator with an engine attached that boosts speed even farther and slows down other ships in tactical combat.

The Humans don't have any kind of ftl drive, they have very fast but still slower than light ships that can jump into the naturally occurring hyperlane network. This makes them very fast but sometimes there's no appropriate hyperlanes and they need to take the long way around or slowboat in realspace.

Then there's the Zuul. The Zuul also use node space, but they do it using their one kind of FTL ship, the Rip Bore. It rips new temporary nodelines in space and then the rest of their non-ftl ships can fly after them. Rip Bores are mad expensive and prime sniping targets, but also the Rip Bores can use their engine in combat to send entire ships to ~~the shadow realm~~ nodespace.

Also there's the Hivers (stargates shaped like bugs), the Liir (lots of tiny teleports meaning they can spin on a dime but are slower near stars, are space dolphins) and the really boring lizards (it's just a warp drive)

Hivers are so slow because you have to sublight to other stars but once you are there you have an instant link to your homeworld forces.

# ¿ Jun 28, 2023 21:03

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# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 01:44

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Not like you couldn't make your own universe with similar differences in ftl tech. There's not much lore other than the pages and pages of fanfic that one dev posted on the forums about the dolphins with the micro telepoet stutter drive thing.

Is fanfic the correct word when it's a dev posting noncanon?

# ¿ Jun 28, 2023 23:51

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