Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Les Os
Mar 29, 2010
so far this year Satan took the form of this woman in Provo, Utah and assaulted a 7-11 clerk with a metal baseball bat. in New York, Poughkeepsies Witchcraft District a mysterious arsonist burned down the Witch House, a popular gathering place for satanists once owned by satanic priest Joe Netherworld


Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

matti
Mar 31, 2019

you only on satan one?



maybe three on a good day

unknown butthole
Jan 2, 2020

The old customs remain
and the ancient gods live on
And this is what the devil does
He grants us virtues to expand his kingdom
God with his lack of knowledge, does not understand this truth
and apose of it with false thoughts and prayers
Satan, Satan, Satan our lord and master
I acknowledge thee as my god and prince
I promise to serve and obey thee as long as I shall live
I renounce the other god and all the saints
Satan, Satan, I promise thee that I will do as much evil as I can
I will draw everyone else to evil
I won't fail to serve and adore thee
I give you my life and soul

Zippy the Bummer
Dec 14, 2008

Silent Majority
The Don
LORD COMMANDER OF THE UKRAINIAN ARMED FORCES
shouldn't a satanic house of worship be on fire at all times?



peanut
Sep 9, 2007


hailsatan2021

Jesustheastronaut!
Mar 9, 2014




Lipstick Apathy
(II) The Demon Regent Asmodeus

Symmetry becomes it.
Come to ruin our impending feast,
a presence that nourishes suffering.
All things below voice his burning name.
His turmoil offers only truth in which longer moments live.
Let consciousness recapture the flicker it saw then.
Torch our continuity of thought
now until that mind evaporates.
Lust after shadows in us,
rend that lace of promises broken and white lies,
regard our love of wreckage,
the way our heads thunder approaching that warning pulse
and temple of throbbing light that is
Asmodeus.

Asmodeus
is that light throbbing of temple and pulse
warning that approaching thunder heads our way.
the wreckage of love,
our regard lies white and broken,
promises of lace that rend us in shadow,
after lust evaporates.
Mind that until now thought of continuity,
our torch, then saw it flicker.
The recapture, consciousness let live moments longer,
which, in truth, only offers turmoil.
His name burning,
his voice below things.
All suffering nourishes that presence.
A feast impending.
Our ruin to come.
It becomes symmetry.

-Alan Moore
*Moon and Serpent Grand Egyptian Theater of Marvels*

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981

Devil gay

StoryTime
Feb 26, 2010

Now listen to me children and I'll tell you of the legend of the Ninja
"It is dangerous to gather flowers that grow on the banks of the pit of hell, for fear of falling in; yea, they which play with the devil’s rattles will be brought by degrees to wield his sword; and from making of sport, they come to doing of mischief."

So basically you get a free sword and gently caress poo poo up on the real! What's a rattle?

Nessus
Dec 22, 2003

After a Speaker vote, you may be entitled to a valuable coupon or voucher!



Zeal and Ardor is a pretty fun band, OP.

Dumb Sex-Parrot
Dec 25, 2020
hail satan so what

Xaintrailles
Aug 14, 2015

:hellyeah::histdowns:

StoryTime posted:

What's a rattle?

Like literally a baby's rattle. Entertainment used to be much harder to come by.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Ugh stanists are sooo lame

Blurry Gray Thing
Jun 3, 2009

Xaintrailles posted:

Like literally a baby's rattle. Entertainment used to be much harder to come by.

I think we all know who to thank for all the rock music and roleplaying games that fixed that.

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013


p sure I went to rehab w/this dude.

deedee megadoodoo
Sep 28, 2000
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one to Flavortown, and that has made all the difference.


Hail seitan.

Legin Noslen
Sep 9, 2004
Fortified with Rhiboflavin
Satan is just alright with me

pop fly to McGillicutty
Feb 2, 2004

A peckish little mouse!
Someone

Always

There

And

Nice

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

:hmmyes:

Hail seitan, the bringer of superior meat substitute!

_____!
May 2, 2004



COME ON DOWN TO DONNY SATAN'S DISCOUNT! WE HAVE OVERSTOCK OF HEATHENS, EVERYONE MUST GO!

PRICES SLASHED ON LIZARDS. WE HAVE SO MANY SNAKES THEY'RE COMING OUT OUR EARS!

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag
Hell Yeah

Bula Vinaka
Oct 21, 2020

beach side
Satan is real, and is the good guy.

The real bad guy is an evil force that created everything. Look how fragile your body is and how easily it breaks. It was a force of evil that took you, a being of pure energy, and trapped it inside of living meat that feels pain at the slightest upset.

The snake is the good guy, the being of knowledge that tries to tell us the truth.

But the bad guy - the "creator" - pulled the best trick of all, which is to make us cling to our bodies and want to survive at all costs, even though we won't really survive, while at the same time convincing everyone that he is the "creator", the good guy who loves all beings, while the force that tries to tell us the truth of what happened and the evil of the creator gets labeled as "Satan" - the greatest liar and force of evil.

It should be easy to see the reverse is true. A child could see it.

Hail Satan.

Bula Vinaka
Oct 21, 2020

beach side

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

Satan took me on a date and then smooched me goodnight and then the next night called me and we spent like an hour on the phone but neither of us really talked we just sat there in silence waiting for the other one to hang up but neither of us wanted to it was amazing I love satan

central dogma
Feb 25, 2012

Come to the Undead Settlement in the next 20 mins if u want an ash kicking
All hail Stolas, commander of 26 legions of hell.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

central dogma
Feb 25, 2012

Come to the Undead Settlement in the next 20 mins if u want an ash kicking
Wrong image. This is Stolas.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
I'm all for Satan but satanists are cosplaying libertarians lol

Dumb Sex-Parrot
Dec 25, 2020

central dogma posted:

Wrong image. This is Stolas.



Ventral EggSac
Dec 3, 2019


Why his peepee on hims belly

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

Les Os posted:

so far this year Satan took the form of this woman in Provo, Utah and assaulted a 7-11 clerk with a metal baseball bat.

Call that a sneer? This bitch ain't even a crab on a hair on the devil's butthole.

quote:

New York, Poughkeepsies Witchcraft District a mysterious arsonist burned down the Witch House, a popular gathering place for satanists once owned by satanic priest Joe Netherworld.

As a lover of both history and Lovecraft, I find that a great shame.

If a misguided fundamentalist specimen of my brethren was the culprit, they should be locked in a cell with the "baseball bat Satan" and taught a lesson they'll still remember on Judgement Day.

But more likely the fire was started by some sad addict breaking in and falling asleep while smoking their crack or hash pipe.

OP, I like the episodic nature of your post, and am waiting for you to turn up further news snippets providing overwhelming indirect evidence for the stirrings of horrible dark forces aeons old, prompting you to go and investigate, barely escaping with your life from disturbing eldritch creatures and foul dark acolytes practising the filthiest of inhuman rites.

BigBadSteve fucked around with this message at 16:21 on Jan 29, 2021

Yaldabaoth
Oct 9, 2012

by Azathoth
The thing to remember about light and darkness is they both immaterial concepts and as such, both seek the destruction of the material world for different reasons.

Linux Pirate
Apr 21, 2012


Satam

pop fly to McGillicutty
Feb 2, 2004

A peckish little mouse!

Bula Vinaka posted:

Satan is real, and is the good guy.

The real bad guy is an evil force that created everything. Look how fragile your body is and how easily it breaks. It was a force of evil that took you, a being of pure energy, and trapped it inside of living meat that feels pain at the slightest upset.

The snake is the good guy, the being of knowledge that tries to tell us the truth.

But the bad guy - the "creator" - pulled the best trick of all, which is to make us cling to our bodies and want to survive at all costs, even though we won't really survive, while at the same time convincing everyone that he is the "creator", the good guy who loves all beings, while the force that tries to tell us the truth of what happened and the evil of the creator gets labeled as "Satan" - the greatest liar and force of evil.

It should be easy to see the reverse is true. A child could see it.

Hail Satan.

Surprisingly close to my actual idea of God and Satan.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
What is this, edgy teens MySpace ?!

peanut
Sep 9, 2007


I looked at the Etsy shop of the witches who manage the Poughkeepsie Witchcraft market and it need improvement

Icochet
Mar 18, 2008

I have a very small TV. Don't make fun of it! Please don't shame it like that~

Grimey Drawer
Idle hands are the Devil's plaything. Turns out he really likes to jack me off. He's OK.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
The acceptable terminology is "tugging"

Slugnoid
Jun 23, 2006

Nap Ghost
:nws: :nws:

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Somebody fucked around with this message at 01:34 on Jan 31, 2021

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

"Uncensored donkey dongs" is the best probation reason I've ever seen.

vortmax
Sep 24, 2008

In meteorology, vorticity often refers to a measurement of the spin of horizontally flowing air about a vertical axis.
HAIL SATIN!

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Zefiel
Sep 14, 2007

You can do whatever you want in life.



Netflix’s live action Megg Mogg and Owl series looking good

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply