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BraveLittleToaster posted:Bring on the Lestrange
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Apr 26, 2021 07:17
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We had some good showings, but it looks like goons just like their big tiddy goth gfs. All currently open votes are now closed. Speaking of which... Rather than constantly asking the thread how to prioritize executives, I’ve set up a strawpoll to keep track of everything. I’ll prioritize both which executives I hire and which ones I  Please click that link and go vote!
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Apr 26, 2021 14:31
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Vicki Lestrange *Edit* drat, I messed that vote up
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Apr 26, 2021 18:20
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I’m trying something a little different with how I format dialogue. Let me know if it works. Update 3: I’m Not Sure What The Lobster Represents The tutorial proper may be over, but we still have mechanics to spare coming down the pipeline. Instead of walking us through them directly…  … The game gives us those little icons in the upper left for us to click on and read if we can’t figure them out through play (a reasonable assumption, most of them are pretty intuitive). I suppose I can see why the devs did that, but it sure doesn’t make for good LPing. From here on out, I’ll introduce a mechanic the moment it shows up and not bother mentioning it unless it’s relevant otherwise – this update will be like 90% mechanics, but as we go on that percentage should flip. But wait, there’s a big spoiler in that image! Soon enough, I get the chance to hire a new executive.  Once again, executive selection will be something the thread has more control over in the future, but while I was writing this yesterday I decided you had enough to vote on and also Pip’s objectively the best choice anyway.   I run a local construction company. There’s a good chance that if you can live in it, I built it. Not personally, of course. My employees do that for me. But don’t go underestimating me. I’m not afraid to get my hands dirty! And I respect that you had to bootstrap your company. I built my company from the ground up, too. So, I’m hoping merging with you will help us both soar to even greater heights!  There’s plenty going on in the character screen, but most of it is irrelevant right now. You see those fist and mustache icons in the top left? Those are Pip’s two core stats, which are… Fisticuffs and Moustache. Fisticuffs determines how much damage you do to your rivals per action in the town square, and Moustache determines how many employees per action you can hire in the slums. Pip’s stats are a little higher than Penny’s right now, but that doesn’t matter much…  … Because the game lets you train stats up.  Take a look at the boardroom (bottom center, just above the rec room, where the portraits are). You can have as many executives around as you like, but you can only deploy as many as you have spaces on the board. You really want at least twice as many executives as you have spaces, since you have to constantly cycle them out and let them recharge or have them perform other functions. And that building just down and right of the slums? Pip will boost her Fisticuffs by a bit every turn she spends fisting people in exchange for a surcharge that goes up the higher the stat is. But wait, I just spotted something on that first screenshot. What’s that icon in the bottom left there?  Well, I guess 25 isn’t all that much –  Hm.   The original image also has censor bars, but those cover so little that I erred on the side of caution and threw my own in on top of them. And in case you were wondering, yes, this event will pop up periodically until you’ve bought French postcards of all 12 executives. Max Gentleman Sexy Business, everybody! After another day or so, I scrape together enough to pay this week’s installments off in full. So Angel appears with another gift.    Oh, right, she’s Tom Nook. At least she doesn’t move back to the due date, meaning we effectively get back whatever time we had left before the last deadline.   In exchange for a fee, you can send any executives you have lying around off to the new station in the bottom right on business trips; when they return, they bring back a little something as a souvenir. You know how I said you want way more executives than you have spaces to deploy them? Sending your spares on train rides is a big part of why. Just remember that as long as they’re out of town they can’t participate in any events.  Once in a while, you’ll see a random event pop up on the map; some let you take actions without consuming Moxie, some let you buy things you wouldn’t have access to otherwise. When there’s a party going on in the town square (it’s kind of hard to see, all the people around it turned blue), the executives you deploy there don’t take any damage. Since Pip’s already comically strong after all that fisting, defeats the next rival in two hits  .  Other times, the game will stop you in your tracks, present you with some conundrum, and force you to choose between options forwarded by three of your assistants (usually either Business Maid or Battle Butler and two random executives). You see those little bars next to the orange face and blue hand at the bottom of the screen? Those are your company’s Morale and Reputation. Reputation just changes the length and frequency of those town square block parties, it isn’t that important. Morale’s a different story. The higher your Morale is, the more likely it is that your employees will start celebrating at one of the buildings, letting executives work there without consuming Moxie; the lower it is, the more likely they are to riot, blocking the building off until the riot disperses or you break the strike like a good 19th century capitalist (which sends your Morale down even lower). These events are your only opportunities to alter with those two values. I took the middle option here because while picking Pip or Penny wouldn’t cost me any Reputation, it would send whoever I chose away for a day, and we’re understaffed as it is. As for what the numbers in those hearts mean… I’ll save that for when we finally get into dating mechanics  With a little more time we earn enough money to pay off Angel and hire another executive. Following the whims of the thread, we pick Vicky.  (surrounded by question marks) I have a shipping company. I guess, we just move things around?  I genuinely had no idea this feature existed before this LP. I guess you learn something new every day. (surrounded by math) Though I suspect there may be more to it than that. Anyway… I’m not particularly inclined to run the business by myself. So please, allow us to work together.  Straight to the train station with you.  It takes me a little while to prep for the final district fight, since they work a bit differently than standard brawls. Partly because you always get some major bonus from them –all your executives having enough Moxie to take another action before resting is a very good thing – but also because they’re on a timer. Fights normally take a while between grinding away at the enemy, resting, and recruiting, and three minutes may not always be enough to pull off a victory before the enemy retreats, invalidating all your hard work.  Pip doesn’t need three minutes to disassemble her opponent.  =>Sup.  What is up… my dear rival, is that I have come to gloat and show both at your pathetic efforts. I overheard a rumor at a very exclusive party (that you weren’t invited to) that you had the audacity not to be wallowing in your own self-pity.=>How dare you make me work this hard. Yes, work. It’s quite… unbecoming… Well then. I see it was a waste of time coming to see you. I can tell you present no threat to me in your current state. Maybe I’ll give you a second thought when you control more than one piddly district. I bid thee farewell.=>*blow a kiss*  Next, next steps. Each district gives you a special asset like that aftershave. I could’ve gone with Pip, whose district asset lets us pursue relationships more efficiently, but no, you had to choose Vicki <  >.(As far as I know, the district names don’t mean anything.)  Not seconds after taking up in a new district we get this event. Galas are the only way we can pick up executives without buying off Angel, but they’re also hideously expensive. Our money is best spent futzing around with other things.  Like this!  Remember those hearts? Those represent your relationship value with that executive. Filling up that heart means you advance to the next scene in their route. The game is overflowing with different ways to boost their affection: pick them during events, take their advice on districts, give them flowers that you pick up from flower stalls that pop up randomly, or, most importantly, take them out on lunch dates.  Here, “lunch date” means play one of maybe five minigames with the object of your (potential) affections. I like blackjack, so I’m glad the game randomly picked that minigame to start out with. I still lost. Not this time, my friend. Unless you completely gently caress up, you’ll usually get at least a little affection out of the deal. As far as I can tell, losing gets you 0 or 1 affection, winning gets you 2, and completely schooling them pisses them off and you don’t get any. I’m not sure how it works, to be honest. It isn’t even consistent date to date. But hey, we get another lunch date right off the bat –   Each character’s tea preferences are randomized, unique, and impossible to learn through anything other than trial and error. I think you get 1 affection from each correct answer, making getting their tea right potentially the most rewarding lunch date minigame (all the others max out at 2).  But since you have to make three guesses and they’ll only tell you the results for one category, you have to get extremely lucky in order to pull that off. I just picked the first option in all three categories, so since I got 1 affection out of this, we can tell she doesn’t like sugar and likes either green tea or mild tea. Hooray.  I wanted to round this update off with Vicki’s scene, but it took me Goddamn forever to get to that point. Like, I have to wait until next update to introduce one of the game’s most important mechanics. Whatever, here we go.  Boss, it is my pleasure to announce the arrival of Vicki Lestrange. =>That sounds a bit crazy, but I’m interested to see where this goes… If you would humor me, we may plumb depths unbeknownst to any mere mortal before us. Sounds a bit dramatic. I know we’ve only just met, but… I find something about you terribly compelling. I can’t quite place my finger on it. Would you mind if we did a simple tarot reading?=>Somehow, I knew you were going to say that. Oh, you have clairvoyance as well? Interesting. But there is something special about you. I must know more.>She reaches between her breasts and extracts a deck of cards, eight tea candles, and a bird’s skull for ambiance. Let’s keep this simple. I will split the deck into three piles, representing your past, present, and future respectively. You may draw from anywhere in the deck. Reveal your choice to me and I will attempt a reading.>She lays out the cards.  =>Pick from the middle. >You reveal the Moon. It glows between two towers, over a river, where a dog fights a wolf and a… lobster tries to break it up? There’s a lot going on here. The wolf, the dog, the dimness of the light – all represent fear, anxiety… insecurity. You’ve grown up in an environment of uncertainty, your choices driven by anxieties you do not yet fully understand. (surrounded by question marks) I… I’m not sure what the lobster represents. Maybe you have an allergy to shellfish? Next, we view the present. This card represents the path you currently walk.=>Draw from the top >You reveal the Rage of Swords. A constipated-looking dandy stands amid heavy winds, wielding a big sword. He seems to be looking for someone to hit with it. (gasp) This card gives off a feeling of restless energy. While the road ahead maybe rough, you appear to be ready, perhaps eager to face the challenge. The challenge probably won’t involve actual sword fighting, but… you never know.  =>Draw from the bottom >You pick the Queen of Swords. A queen sits on elaborate throne, grimly challenging the sky to a swordfight. This card represents a clarity of mind, and an intensity of purpose. It shows that your perceptive, quick thinking nature gives you the ability to “cut to the chase”, as it were. (anime sweatdrop) …I was trying to do a sword pun there. I’m sorry. Hm. Thank you for indulging me. I hope you can reflect upon yourself through the lenses of these cards. While this has been very interesting, I’m not any closer to understanding my attraction to you. I need some time alone to think this over. We will meet again.>She wanders off, lost in thought.  And our reward is clothes. Also some mechanical bonuses I think, but who cares about that? For completing her first scene, we can now make Vicki wear this mildly offensive outfit. I’ll keep her in her original costume for now because Goddammit, game, I expected a little more sensitivity from you, but as time goes on we’ll unlock more and more costumes for more and more characters – and this game being this game, they cover progressively less skin until your reward for completing their route is full nudity. Probably not gonna show that in the thread. When we get outfits that are a little less  , I’ll start polling the thread about costume choices.
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Apr 26, 2021 22:13
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Do the guys lose clothes too? If so, that's very cool.
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Apr 27, 2021 00:22
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Humbug Scoolbus posted:Do the guys lose clothes too? If so, that's very cool. They do. Also, note that our Angel Investor refurbished a charming old church to make way for that train station. I'm sure the conveniently labeled orphanage in the lower left corner will be fiiiiine.
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Apr 27, 2021 00:36
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Oh come on, when have bad things ever happened to orphans in media? Other than the obvious 'becoming an orphan' bit, I mean.
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Apr 27, 2021 00:56
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kaosdrachen posted:They do. How did I never notice that  Kaboom Dragoon posted:Oh come on, when have bad things ever happened to orphans in media? ... You say, with your Drakengard avatar.
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Apr 27, 2021 02:29
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I'm certainly a fan of big-breasted women, but I will request our next executive be male and also our next date. Spread the love.
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Apr 27, 2021 21:13
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Falconier111 posted:How did I never notice that Can you really consider them orphans when you're murdering them and their parents at the same time though? I think not! Kaboom Dragoon fucked around with this message at 21:28 on Apr 27, 2021 |
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Apr 27, 2021 21:25
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Mega64 posted:I'm certainly a fan of big-breasted women, but I will request our next executive be male and also our next date. Spread the love. These posts are usually played a day in advance of when they're written, so I can't completely fill your request. But you're in luck! Update 4: Rabbits, But Sexier And Richer I decided to drop the facial animation caption technique I used last time. Let me know if that actually worked. I don’t think it did. So where were we? Didn’t I have to put something off until this update?  Oh, right. Thanks, Tom.  Now that we’ve paid off our first two rounds of debt, we have a new complication to deal with: Angel will only accept debt payments in gold, and we only get gold by having executives work in the new factory just above the square… Somehow. It takes 2500 to make one bar, maybe they compress it? Up until this point, paying off our debt has been relatively easy, somewhere in the neighborhood of 25,000 total so far. With gold on the line? Each payment now requires 25 gold, which translates to 62,500 per payment. By the time I got the factory, I’d built up over two weeks of buffer time, and while I won’t eat up all of it, I kind of doubt I could fill all four orders in just seven days. Between factory management, fighting, and three open board spaces, I’m being stretched to the breaking point here as far as executives go. So, having built up a gold reserve, it’s time to blow it all on a new employee! Are we going to get lucky and finally pick up Santa Claus?  … No, we’ll get three characters that have two votes between them. Summer edges Tony out in utility, but I flipped a coin and got Hardmeat, so now he’s the one coming on board. Honestly, it’s a good thing too. If we’d picked Summer we’d have had two thirds of the game’s eligible bachelorettes on our team with no men, and it was a clambake in here already. Boss, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Antonie Hardmeat.  … Uh, Antonie won his legal company in a horse race.>He’s not moving very much. Isn’t that interesting?>You’re not sure what’s going on. All right… Wow, poor kid. I hope working him to the bone in the gold factory won’t backfire! Instead of putting him straight to work there, though, I deploy him to the bank with Penny and Vicki, rotating them whenever one of them gets too tired to continue. I’d rather have enough money in the bank (so to speak) to drain an executive from full Moxie to zero than have to constantly pull them out when I run out of cash, again.  Which turns out to be a good idea. This is one of the best random events in the game. 25,000 is a serious investment, but you can normally only get assets through Angel or by conquering entire districts, so picking one up like this is worth paying through the nose for. I choose an asset that doubles Fisticuffs gains in the Gym, massively speeding up Pip’s training.  Speaking of whom, a couple days after meeting the merchant I get a lunch date with her that brings in the third minigame:  Boss, I’ve finished stacking all the wineglasses into an impractically tall pyramid for our guests tonight. =>Has the entertainment arrived? I don’t hear clapping. We had to forbid clapping in front of the hawk circus, boss. Remember the massacre from last time? It made the newspaper after all… The cost for prosthetic eyes and nipples was through the roof after that one. On that note, as the party is now in full swing, it is my pleasure to announce the arrival of Pi… Wait, where did she go? She was just here.>Your maid wanders off.  =>Nope. >You ignore the spooky invitation and resume milling about your party. But as the night continues, little movements out the corner of your eye keep you wary. Suddenly, a hand bursts from the shadows and pulls you in. =>I need an adult! >Another hand covers your mouth, before you can speak. The hands are soft for a kidnapper… and smell faintly of witch hazel.   I do not mean to alarm you, but one of your guests… =>I need an adult! Worry not! Pip Whipple: Amateur Detective Extraordinaire, is on the case! I’m entrusting you with this information because, through deductive reasoning, I’ve determined you could not be the guilty party.=>Because I’m rich?  I’ll be needing a full guest list for this little soirée you’ve put together. Tonight is too soon to act. I don’t have all the clues and you’re still too green. The criminal must be brought to justice, but until then we must maintain our cover.=>The cover that we didn’t murder someone? The cover of not being detectives. If the murderer knows were[sic] on their tail, we’ll lose the element of surprise. If we are to be seen in public, we must maintain the guise of a regular civilian friendship.  >She scurries off.  As you complete a character’s route, you gradually open up item slots (middle left), which you then fill with random junk you pick up from street fights or trips abroad. Items give you a variety of bonuses to specific situations – I already gave her a cane, which lets her do more damage in combat – but for the most part they’ll fade into the background noise of this LP. I just wanted to discuss them now in case we need to come back to them later for whatever reason. Oh, the outfit? It looks like poo poo, I’m not making Pip wear it. She’s way too busy clowning on business enterprise/street gangs to cosplay right now. Time is your most valuable asset in MGSB, bar none. Training up your attack, recruiting meat shields, and training up your ability to recruit meat shields (we just unlocked the barbershop near the bank, it boosts a characters Moustache) all take a lot of time, and your executives only have so much moxie. When it comes to combat, right now our priority is maximizing Pip’s damage potential until she can take down bosses while giving her enough padding to not get kicked out of the arena before the timer expires. My first go at the next boss actually burned out; she ran out of recruits before I could seal the deal. The second time went differently.   Well done. Well done. Of course I wouldn’t be rivals with just anyone, you see. =>Oh, are we… is this going to turn sexy? Not that kind of romance you fool! It’s more like how a sailor loves the ocean… or how a dog loves the ocean… or how a fish loves the ocean… Uhm… if you don’t mind me interrupting… why exactly are you two rivals? Well, you see, it all began with…=>Scorned lovers. Oh… did you two… date?=>I wouldn’t call it dating as much as I would call it “sexing”.  All right, but which of you was at fault in this incident?=>My rival, of course. Mwuahaha. Indeed it was I who decided to dump your rear end like a bag of kittens tied to a brick.=>You were a selfish lover anyhow. You had way more orgasms than me.   None of that matters now.=>Yes, because of the OTHER reason we’re rivals. OTHER reason? Ah yes, there was also… =>Oh wait. Nevermind there wasn’t another one. Yes. Best not to dwell on the distant past. All that matters is that you didn’t invite me to your last dinner party. Your treachery continues to this day. I look forward to putting you in your place once again. If you can reach me, that is. Mwuahahaha! Bye.That scene was probably the dirtiest thing I’ve ever transcribed. I’m not sure if that says more about this game or about me. You may have realized I skipped two full dialogue sequences when we were discussing the reasons for our eternal enmity. Those options just loop around without changing anything other than text on the “let’s move along” box. I think I’ve mentioned it before: Max Gentlemen Sexy Business seems to offer extensive dialogue trees, but that’s an illusion. As far as I’m aware, the options you pick never affect the overall plot, the route, or even the event further than the next dialog box or two. It keeps the plot on track and simple to write and I can’t help but be sympathetic to that, but it sure doesn’t increase player agency or replayability. The game sort of hides this fact by restricting you to one save file and packing each scene with dialogue choices to imply there’s more going on, but the game lets you replay dates. Going through them makes the point abundantly clear. For instance, you remember Vicki’s tarot deck? Each option gives you a different card with a different meaning, but they don’t affect the rest of the scene and as far as I can tell they don’t affect anything else later on. It doesn’t matter what you say or do, it won’t piss anybody off any more or less than the plot demands. Of course, it’s been a while since I played this all the way through, and it’s possible I’m missing some critical information. And it’s not like the game’s plotline as it stands isn’t interesting, especially since looks like the next update might boost its runtime by another third. It just feels off that a game so emphatic about sex-positivity has such a deterministic approach to seducing people. But such is life, I suppose. Anyway, I have another couple questions to ask, and that means more voting! First off, as we get further in the game, hire more executives, and start to complete routes, you may end up rethinking who you voted for – and since Strawpoll.me doesn’t allow you to retract your vote, once you make your decision, you’re stuck. So, we’ve got three options going forward:
Voting is open for the next 48 hours. The next update is mostly written anyway, so these choices won’t come into effect yet.On a less formal note, the images look blurry on my phone’s screen, to the point that it kind of hurts to read. Is anyone else having this problem? Falconier111 fucked around with this message at 23:09 on Apr 28, 2021 |
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Apr 28, 2021 01:12
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Make new polls Stay on target! And the pictures seem fine on my phone, although I have to turn out sideways to make the images big enough to properly see.
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Apr 28, 2021 04:56
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RudeCat posted:Make new polls Agreeing with these goals.
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Apr 28, 2021 04:57
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Update 5: Nothing Tiny About My Occult Rituals  Another district down, another district on the way. I could’ve had a chair on the board open up, but no, you want me to stay the course  !At this point, things are probably going to start feeling pretty disjointed – not that they weren’t disjointed before, but, you know. Since I’ve already covered the vast majority of the mechanics, I’ll mostly be hopping between story scenes whenever they show up. Assume that there’s a bunch of gameplay going on in the background that I’m just skipping over.  Anyway, new date minigame! It’s called “Wouldst thou rather”. Seriously? That language was archaic by Shakespeare’s time, let alone the 1800s. Whatever.  Pretty simple – three rounds, pick the one of the two cards presented you think best matches their personality, get graded at the end. These questions get weird; we aren’t talking about duck-sized horses-style questions, more “what horrible and/or embarrassing thing would you prefer to happen to you?”  Unlike that Goddamn tea minigame, your score depends on your knowledge of the character’s personality, which rewards players who’ve already been through their routes. Of course, sometimes the correct answer makes no sense, but that’s par for the course for this sort of personality analysis minigame.  I play these updates out maybe a day or so before I actually write them, so when I got the selection I was like “goddamnit, another bunch of duds”. That was before Bonbon shot ahead in the poll sometime last night, but I picked her anyway because at that point she was the only one who had votes at all. Boss, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Bonbon von Valentine.  >You blush despite your best efforts not to.  >She side-eyes your maid, who immediately blushes as well.  Here’s to the union of my modest entertainment business with your… swelling enterprise.>She winks.  …What the hell does it take to make the person who hosed their way through an entire village blush?  I took this screenshot maybe 20 minutes after we hired Bonbon on. If you look in the bottom right corner, you can see we prepaid our loan with a month to spare!   gently caress you, Angel ! You see, my employer has sent me to ensure your victory. But we’re just about out of time. What that means is… well, you’re going to need to defeat your arrival and reclaim your family’s company. If you can’t do that before times up… it’s game over.What, did you think the game would just end without reaching a triumphant climax? The fact that we still have a full month left makes this a less than pressing issue, especially because we’ve already come this far in two weeks. If we really need to, we can spot her some gold and she’ll extend our loan for another week, but that gets prohibitively expensive after a payment or two.  But in return for making our final payment, she levels the orphanage in the bottom left and replaces it with an office building – and she doesn’t preemptively plunge us into debt this time! Throw somebody in here and they’ll gradually produce items that can be translated to money. It’s a lot slower than the bank, but people in the office don’t lose moxie over time. Have a spare executive with full moxie? Toss them in the office, let them earn you a little something, take them out when a space opens up. And hey, with the office’s help we have enough cash to attend the next gala!  I cannot tell you how happy I am that Fanny is the only character here who has any votes. Not only is her name a British slang term for vagina, but hers was my favorite route the last two times I played this game. Boss, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Fanny Shufflebottom. Pleased to make your acquaintance.  Wow, this place is so great. I’m new in town.>She wanders off.  >She wanders back.    This next screenshot.  This screenshot hides a miracle. Through pure trial and error, I determined that Vicki prefers mild green tea with no sugar or milk. I have never made a character a perfect cup of tea before. I’ve beaten the game twice and I pull this off now on my third try   Boss, I believe Vicki Lestrange has come calling once more… At least, that’s what I assume this box of mouse bones she sent you is supposed to mean. Ah yes, here she is now. Have fun, you two! Hello, Boss. Forgive my intrusion – I’m sure you’re quite busy bathing in money and going to parties, as are we all, but…  =>You had me at “haunted.” I hope I also had you at “cottage in the woods.” We’d best get going if we are to make it there before the moon’s apex.>Vicki’s carriage is waiting just out front. The back seat is separated from the front by a thick black curtain. The inside of the carriage is festooned with various occult sigils and charms. Intricately tied tangles of bones hang from hooks on the ceiling; the cab smells of sage and black licorice. When Vicki’s chauffeur closes the door behind you, you notice that the windows have all been painted black as well. The only light comes from a red-tinted lantern hanging from the ceiling. I’m told my carriage can be somewhat stifling. If it is, I apologize. You, though. You are different, somehow. Perhaps you are not a person?=>What else would I be? I’m sorry if that was rude. Hopeful thinking perhaps.>Vicki taps the back of the seat in front of you, and the car takes off.  =>Why this cottage in particular? I suppose you would be curious about that, hehe. The truth is, the cottage belonged to my grandfather. When I was a child, we used to visit from time to time. He was always rather distant – I hardly spoke to him – but I read his books. =>What became of your grandfather? Well… he died. In this cottage, several years ago. No, no, don’t look so upset. He’s not gone.  >With that, Vicki lapses into silence, seemingly lost in thought. The cab shudders as you make the transition from city streets to country road. Something rattles inside an ornate silver box. =>What’s all this weird stuff doing in here? All of it? That would be like asking, “what are all those weird organs doing in your torso?” Some of them are charms to ensure a safe journey. Others make me invisible to evil spirits.  =>That fist-sized eyeball in the glass vase. It’s an antitheft device. I have the cow’s other eye in a jar at home. If my carriage is ever stolen… I can simply ask the eye I keep it home what the other eye sees. I’ve yet to test it, but the magic is sound.>Vicki’s sleepy gaze drifts away from yours, and she sits a while in silence. The carriage slows down as it attempts to ascend a hill. Several perfect obsidian spheres towards your feet. =>Let’s sit in silence. What a lovely idea. Talking is exhausting. >After a long and disorienting journey, the carriage finally shudders to a halt. The driver opens your door to reveal the cottage. Well… not really a cottage, as much is a rickety cabin. Or a… what’s the word… murder hut?  >The inside is decorated in a style that can only be described as “Bohemian Satanist”. There are at least a dozen pentagrams, a bookshelf full of books that probably aren’t bound with human flesh, and a lot of decorative bones. You don’t know if octopi have skeletons, but you’re not sure what else that could be on the shelf.  Speaking of which… ever since he died and left this cabin to me, I’ve longed to speak with him again. We never got much of a chance to talk when he was alive, but I thought… well, with your powerful aura and all… Perhaps we could have a pleasant little séance?  =>There’s nothing tiny about my occult rituals, if you know what I mean.  But… I’ll take that as a yes? Wonderful. I’ll get some blood from the icebox.>You help Vicki paint a series of complicated-looking sigils on her dinner table with some nice, chilled blood. She’s even thoughtful enough to provide a jet black robe in your exact size! When the sigils are complete and the candles are lit, Vicki grasps your hands and closes her eyes. Her palms are slightly damp, but her hands are warm. Grandpa Mephisto, we gather here tonight in the hope that we will receive a sign of your presence. Please feel welcome in our circle and join us whenever you feel ready.… Any moment now…>The house creaks. !!! =>He probably wants us to smooch. Really? Okay.>Vicki leans forward and gives you the tiniest peck on the lips. She sits back, looking flushed. Did it work? … Perhaps we can try again during the next lunar eclipse, when the spirits are feeling more communicative. For now, it’s probably best that we call it a night.>As you gather your things, Vicki goes to the door, opens it, peers outside, then calmly closes it and turns to you. There are 12 wolves outside.>Vicki looks outside again. Thirteen. There are thirteen wolves. A very auspicious number, but probably still lethal. We should probably remain here for the night. … It’s worth clarifying that, as much as I’m trying to follow through on Yes Sex, there does come a point where I am just not comfortable picking some options. I could say to her… =>It’s better than all right. Take me to your creepy bedroom!  … But saying that to someone who doesn’t get it when you brag about how big your occult rituals are? That’s just uncool. Like I said earlier, you’re never at risk of giving people unwanted attention – she follows up her stammering by basically saying “I’m interested but not yet,” to which your character accedes immediately. But it still makes me feel kinda uncomfortable, and so I see no reason to do it. Take that  .=>I’ve fought 11 wolves before, what’s two more? … Are you sure?>You’re sure, for some reason. You charge outside to fight the wolves. It turns out to more wolves is a lot more wolves. They mug you and take your fancy hat. You flee back inside. Only your muscular calves save you from a rigorous mauling.  =>Sorry the whole… séance thing didn’t work out. Oh, it’s quite all right. After all, I mainly invited you here because I wanted to spend more time with you. Goodnight!>You crawl into bed and fall fast asleep. You dream of standing with Vicki in a fountain of blood, totally nude. Your Sunday school instructor is there for some reason, but you don’t mind. You awake refreshed and rejuvenated, and ride back to the city with Vicki in amiable silence.  … You know what? Why not. On to her this outfit goes. As for what “Flirty” means… That will come up next update.  I also just realized that the hats and bodies of costumes can be equipped separately, which means I can get rid of Pip’s stupid helmet and keep the rest of the uniform. Hooray! The two votes from last time are still open and will be for 24 hours In case you’ve forgotten: Falconier111 posted:First off, as we get further in the game, hire more executives, and start to complete routes, you may end up rethinking who you voted for – and since Strawpoll.me doesn’t allow you to retract your vote, once you make your decision, you’re stuck. So, we’ve got three options going forward: Also, the new character poll will go up the moment the current vote closes. Falconier111 fucked around with this message at 23:28 on Apr 28, 2021 |
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Apr 28, 2021 23:25
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Targets sighted, stay on course
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Apr 29, 2021 00:11
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This seems utterly bizarre but oddly facinating. Make new polls periodically. Share the love.
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Apr 29, 2021 01:31
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cokerpilot posted:This seems utterly bizarre but oddly facinating. I support this.
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Apr 29, 2021 04:25
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New polls Share the love
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Apr 29, 2021 06:03
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Anyone else keep thinking Vicki's default outfit reveals a hell of a lot more than it actually does? Those pink stars deceive the eyes.
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Apr 29, 2021 13:42
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cokerpilot posted:This seems utterly bizarre but oddly facinating. I also support this.
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Apr 29, 2021 16:23
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Kaboom Dragoon posted:Anyone else keep thinking Vicki's default outfit reveals a hell of a lot more than it actually does? Those pink stars deceive the eyes. Welcome to this game. There's a reason I almost didn't include Bonbon's hiring picture.
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Apr 29, 2021 18:11
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Update 6: The Spiders Are So Anxious To Meet You As we hire enough executives to start really cycling them out, their moxie bonuses turn from nice timesavers to strategic advantages. I’ve already talked about moxie bonuses for specific exec placements – Penny in the bank, Pip in the town square – but now? Fanny has a mild moxie bonus during the daytime, meaning if you schedule her deployments right you can get some serious mileage out of her, while Vicki gets a bonus to any action during autumn. We just entered autumn. You don’t need to maximize your efficiency to win the game, but you absolutely do if you want to roar through as many routes as possible – you only have so much time, and the more resources you can pump into boosting affection, the better. Anyway, we beat the district boss. Also I forgot to put Vicki’s new costume on before I got the screenshot. Don’t tell the thread   =>Finally! I was just thinking that I’ve not been congratulated enough for becoming rich again.  Fret not, boss. We scheduled quite an array of brown-nosers to boost your ego through the evening.  =>What a grand idea. I can’t wait to gloat! Wonderful. I’ve arranged for a gaggle of impressionable youths to witness your grandstanding and look upon your deeds with awe. As usual. =>Oh, you actually showed up?  To your pity party? I wouldn’t miss it.  =>I’d say it’s more like a turtle learning to skateboard. A sexy turtle. You may have conquered that last district, but your workforce is still only a fraction of the power you’ll need to even think about facing me.=>Yes yes. I understand how game progression works. Good. I’m glad we’re clear on that.  =>Perhaps we can set aside our differences for the evening and have a nice dinner. Ah yes. Let us have dinner. That should prove an interesting change of pace from our usual butting of heads.>You find an empty table and sit together. Business Maid sets the table and goes to patch the first course.  =>How about… that weather? Ah yes, the constant choking fog that slowly smothers us Englanders. It’s been… as to be expected. Choking and so forth…>Your rival looks down at their hands and fidgets with their napkin. Business Maid brings out the first of an unknowable number of courses. Ah! Wonderful. The food is here. Tell me, what are we having? She lets out a fine ojou laugh. Oh, how very exorbitant. I’m impressed. And for me? =>Discreetly wave your hand in front of your neck to signal “no poison this time.” >Business Maid catches on and quickly ushers away the waiter rolling up a barrel with a skull and cross bones on it. Oh uh, you’ll be having… Also, and egg. Silly me, I forgot it. Let me go fetch that for you. Charming of you to not attempt poisoning me. It really creates a friendly environment for more open discourse. Holy poo poo, the first multiple-choice section that doesn’t have another character on screen! =>Play footsie. >Your rival stiffens in shock. =>Smile and playfully kick their feet some more. Oh. …Heh, I see.>Your rival attempts to playfully brush and push against you. You both awkwardly smile and laugh through the thick tension… As your competitive natures begin to overcome the friendly spirit of the interaction, the exchanges become increasingly violent.  =>Kick off your shoes and interlock toes for toe wrestling!   >You and your rival press firmly against each other, feet to feet. You walk on your hands with your backs arched and attempt to push each other out of the ring. You struggle against each other for a few tense moments before your rival suddenly breaks form. No! No. I can’t! I mustn’t! I made a promise to my family. Well then. We prove once again that we cannot put our differences aside. I see now that this dinner was a mistake. I think it’s clear who came out on top this time. Congratulations… or, better luck next time? Sorry, I wasn’t actually paying attention. I was busy preparing the map room for our next move.…   Second to last district, folks. Are you excited? I’m excited.  Remember “flirty” from the last update? All it does is unlock a couple new lunch date minigames. Massage actually hosed me up the first few times I tried it, but it’s simple in theory: wait for the arrow in the lower right corner to hit green, hit the button when it does, do this three times, get your score. The game divides your date’s body into several zones of somewhat uneven length that activate at random, but it doesn’t tell you this; all you know is the dial never stays green for the same amount of time between rounds. I managed to do pretty well and milk some affection out of this.  Unfortunately, that’s not enough affection for next date, and I’m not waiting for more lucky breaks and lunches to unlock it. So, I take the chance to empty my inventory. Flower carts show up unannounced somewhere on the map every day or two, giving you flowers that boosts an executive’s affection by one; love tonics are items you get from street battles or train rides that do the same, only more. It takes most of my stash to get Vicki’s heart filled, but it was more than worth it.  Boss, nine black cats have arrived at the estate, each one carrying a bundle of frankincense in its teeth. I… think Vicki is on her way again. Oh, yes, here she comes now, emerging from a creeping fog, as usual. … I can’t tell whether the outfit hurts or helps the mood.  My only regret is that we did not manage to summon my grandfather’s spirit. But it’s a triple blood Moon tonight – the time when the veil is thinnest and spirits walk amongst us. =>Aw yeah. Let’s get wrist deep in some eldritch rituals. Our wrists will be just the beginning, if we do it properly. We’d best get going. My carriage is outside, and the cabin – as you recall – is quite far.  =>You’ve been holding out on me this whole time? Not intentionally. I wasn’t sure if you were the type. Here.>Vicki hands you a vial of inky black fluid that smells of lemon and gunpowder. It sounds as if it wants to tell you a secret. =>Down the hatch! Impressive chug, although well above the recommended dosage. Let me know how it is; I’ve never tried it myself. >It turns out that a carriage jam-packed with occult nonsense is not an ideal place to be contending with the rapid dissolution of your self.  =>Your dentist.   Speaking of teeth, can I borrow a few? Just for a couple of days. I’m not asking for me. It’s for a spider I know.=>Well, you’re the medical professional!  But you know what they say: don’t negotiate against yourself! Let’s have those teeth!>Always eager to please, you go on a magical journey inside your own mouth, that only stops when…  >You sober up a bit before entering the cabin. The cabin isn’t quite so shocking this time around, nor is the fact that Vicki has already covered the dining table in bloody Satanic sigils. Make yourself at home. I’ll go get the roads in animal sacrifice.>Vicki disappears before you can say anything. She returns moments later with two jet black robes, a pair of them said in knives, and an adorable sleeping bunny rabbit. =>Is there a way to do this… without an animal sacrifice? Well… I’m just worried that it didn’t work last time because we weren’t sufficiently committed. If you’ve got some other way of demonstrating our conviction, I’m all ears.=>Let’s use our own blood! I like the way you think. We can even use these knives. They’re multipurpose!>You muster up the courage and, sacrifice complete, you sit down across from Vicki to begin the séance.  =>We came here to summon your grandpa, didn’t we? You’re quite right. Thank you, again, for doing this with me.>Vicki takes your hand and closes her eyes. Grandpa Mephisto, with this ritual sacrifice, we invite you to join us in our circle. >The room turns deathly cold. A breeze howled outside. Then, all sound ceases, as if your head is buried in cotton wool. All you can hear is Vicki, breathing. Grandpa? Is that you?>You think you hear a voice on the wind…  That’s… well… it’s hard to be sure with these things.The text switches between shaky all-caps for Mephisto and normal text for Vicki. MAYBE, THE WAY YOU SUMMON. YOU CALL THAT SACRIFICE? IN MY DAY WE USED WHOLE CHILDREN. That’s frowned upon these days, Grandpa. How are you – Fair. I… I was just trying to… JUST TRYING TO WHAT? EMBARRASS ME TO DOUBLE-DEATH? YOUR SUMMONING SPELL BARELY EVEN WORKED, BY THE WAY. I JUST DROPPED IN TO TELL YOU WHAT A DISAPPOINTMENT YOU’RE BEING. =>How are you feeling?  I suppose when someone dies, you tend to forget the bad things. Still, I wish he hadn’t been so horrid. I’ve always looked up to him.>Vicki looks forlornly up at a portrait of her grandfather on the mantle, then shakes herself and smiles. But we can’t but all this good blood go to waste, can we?=>Is there anyone else you’ve lost who you’d like to reconnect with? Why yes, actually. One of my cats – Cornelius – passed away three summers ago. I’ve never tried summoning an animal before, but Cornelius had such a strong personality… it’s worth a try. Let my body be a vessel. My voice, your voice. You are welcome here.>Vicki suddenly sits bolt upright. Her eyes go wide. She looks at you as if you are a stranger. …>Vicki very deliberately reaches out and knocks over the candle in the middle of the table. The rug begins to catch fire. Meanwhile, Vicki gets up, goes to the bookshelf and knocks the books off it one by one. Things getting out of hand. You should probably… =>Put out the fire. >You grab a bucket of water and throw it on the fire. It puts out the fire, but some of it gets on Vicki too.  >She leaps at you, clawing and hissing. You suffer some serious scratches before you get her calm down. Oh, goodness! What happened? Why are all these books on the floor? >You explain, as courteously as possible. Ah, yes. I suppose dear Cornelius did have a bit of a destructive leaning. Oh, how I miss him. Though I don’t miss how often I had to rebuild my estate when he was around… We should probably get this cleaned up before continuing, shouldn’t we?>You get everything more or less back to how it was, then return to the table. Who should we summon now?=>Is there some historical figure you would like to meet? Well… Most people don’t know this about me, because my other eccentricities tend to take center stage… But I fancy myself a bit of a painter! I’ve always dreamed of meeting Michelangelo. We could summon him! Join hands with me. I’ll try. >Vicki’s voice trails off and a strange look enters her eyes.  >Vicki examines her own body with shock and alarm. Sono una donna adesso?... Mi chiedo come sono le mie tette…>Vicki starts to excitedly undress herself. Something’s not right. =>Rebuke her in flawless Italian! >Good thing you spent several years volunteering in a home for Italian perverts. You calmly but forcefully chastise Michelangelo for his bad behavior. Vicki seems crestfallen. Mi dispiace. Vado via ora.>With some of the blood from the ritual, she finger-paints an “I’m sorry” card on a piece of vellum. It’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. Then, the strange look leaves her eyes, and her shoulders slump.  =>Maybe we should call it a night. >Vicki nods somberly, removing her robe. I suppose you’re right. Let’s not push our luck.  I can’t thank you enough for accompanying me on this spiritual voyage. I can count on one hand the number of people would be willing to indulge me so far. And it’s not one of MY hands. It’s a fingerless hand I bought from a traveling hand salesman.  Interested?=>Oh, “hell” yes. Blasphemous innuendo. My favorite. Care to accompany me to the “spider room?”=>Lead the way!  >They are indeed. You spend the night in the warm embrace of several thousand curious spiders. As their searching legs lull you to sleep, you can’t help but wonder: Could it all have been real? Or was it all just a side effect of those drugs you took like an idiot? You drift off to sleep, questions unanswered, and dream of black cats and bunny rabbits; spiders and corkscrews. … All current votes are now closed! Since the vote was relatively close, I’ll go for a mixed approach; while Vicki will still get priority since we’re closing in on the end of her route, I’ll be mixing in other character’s dates for variety. Think every other date. The new executive poll can be found here! Make sure to refresh your vote!vote for FannyE: It’s only NOW that I realize that I should have held off voting until after the next update tomorrow . Go ahead and vote if you like, but there’ll be a series of intro sequences that might change your opinions on characters we don’t have yet.
Falconier111 fucked around with this message at 04:29 on Apr 30, 2021 |
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Apr 30, 2021 01:25
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Update 7: You Raise The Pipes To Your Lips Not much going on here. I’ve been getting more than a couple major events (the kind where you choose between characters’ options), but they're usually directly related to actual business – worker complaints, shortages, hiring practices, whatever. Less interesting than the kind of nonsense you get on dates. Speaking of which!  Boss, Pip Whipple has sent word via carrier pigeon that she is “hiding somewhere on the premises in anticipation of a secret meeting.” =>The Mystery Room. If anyone can deduce what that rooms for, it’s Pip. Yes, that sort of room would naturally attract an inquisitive sort like her. Very well, let us search.>The problem, unfortunately, is that you cannot for the life of you remember where the Mystery Room is located. Finally, frustrated by your inability to find her, Pip stomps up behind you and taps you on the shoulder.  >She leads you to the Mystery Room, which is apparently where she was hiding after all. You sit down on something that might be a couch, and she spreads out the thick sheet of paper on what is probably a table. As you can see from these documents, I’ve narrowed down my list of murder suspects to just 12 individuals.>You scan the list. It looks like a list of basically every you know. Obviously we can’t investigate all 12 at once… So I’ve divided the suspects up into groups, based on the likelihood that they are the one who done it. >Pip hands you a piece of paper labeled “PRIME SUSPECTS.” It has three names on it.  … We have hired none of those executives. =>Sinterklaas. Never trust a man with dimples that merry. A compelling point. But suspicions are not enough. We’ll have to tail him to find out if he’s the real murderer. But how will we escape detection?=>Disguises!     Here he is, thread. The man you were so thirsty for that somebody managed to vote for him in the first poll before I put the link in the thread. >You trail him through the afternoon, in which time he…takes a homeless woman to a doctor, fixes a leaky roof at an orphanage, and pets a dog. What’s going on here? This guy might as well be a saint. He’s basically committing reverse-crimes!>Sinter looks your way and starts towards you.  >Pip fruitlessly hides behind a barrel.   I have some soothing throat lozenges that might help. Would you like one? You… Yes, that would be lovely.>Sinterklaas happily provides a soothing lozenge, and goes merrily along his way. Oh well, back to the drawing board.>Back at her place, Pip produces a second list of names and hands it over to you. It’s labeled, “(OTHER) PRIME SUSPECTS.”  =>Antonie Hardmeat. Maybe he thought doing a murder would finally make people respect him. Always the shy ones, isn’t it? I agree. In fact, I agree so much that I took the liberty of inviting Mister Hardmeat over here before you even said his name.  Is everything all right? I hope I haven’t upset anyone. I can – GET IN THE INTERROGATION ROOM, YOU MURDERER!  =>Say nothing. Start playing the bagpipes. >You raise the pipes to your lips… Oh God, I can’t take it anymore! I confess! To the murder?! To whatever it is you want me to confess! Arrest me, hang me, I don’t care! Just don’t subject me to one more minute of this torture!… Get out of here, Antonie. You’re free to go. Oh, thank you! If you’d arrested me, I don’t know what I would have told my horse!>Antonie flees, his every gesture showing deep relief. Okay, third time’s the charm… Perhaps the murderer was being blackmailed by the victim. Which of these people do you think is the most likely to have a dark and shameful secret? =>Fanny Shufflebottom’s royalty, isn’t she? Those people are always getting blackmailed. You’re right! And you know who else was royalty?... A lot of people! And most of them did tons of murders! There’s only one thing to do: break into her bedroom while she’s away and search for clues!>Before you know it, Pip has dragged you into Fanny’s private quarters and is rooting through her underwear drawer.  =>I’ll check this box labeled “ALL WOULD BE SNOOPERS, OPEN THIS FIRST.” >You throw open the box to discover… a spring-loaded bear trap! Boss! Stop being maimed this instant! We need to complete our search before… Fanny! I can explain! We were… just… visiting!  As if I’d hunt a human. Soft skin, nubby fingers, flat teeth… That… is a convincing argument. In any case, we won’t get any more clues with the suspect standing around staring at us. Let’s go! Yeah, no, cool, just see yourselves out after breaking into my room. I’ll just be here resetting my traps. That’s fine.>Pip leads you out into the street, where she shakes her head in consternation. I was hoping it wouldn’t come to this, but… When all orthodox methods have been exhausted, all that remains is to attempt the unorthodox! All this time we’ve been looking for someone who had a reason to commit the murder. But that’s just where the murderer would expect us to look! Here, I’ve compiled a short list. Which of these do you think is least likely to be the murderer?=>You really think a bookish chap like Gunn Moses could commit a crime? Oh, you think books and violence have nothing to do with each other, do you? Seriously, there’s even a part or a guy tries to ritually sacrifice his own son! Books are messed up! Exposure to all that glorified violence can really mess with your brain… And so, I suspect our friend Mister Moses. Quick! Let’s track him down and frisk him!>You track down Gunn Moses leaving a high society party. Pip stops you before you get too close.  =>Hey, Gunn, it’s me, your friend who is definitely not distracting you from anything.  Yes! Thank you for making that known!  How refreshing to hear from a friend who only desires to…. My pockets are being searched after all, aren’t they? Carry on then. It is only customary. Ha HA! I found something! A book, probably full of murder secrets! No, don’t read that, it’s –  After all, you… can’t judge a book by its cover?… I don’t think Gunn did the murder. Let’s go. Wait, can I have my – No. =>Chin up, Pip. Maybe the real murder investigation was the friends we made along the way! Yeah, except one of those friends IS A MURDERER! We will catch that murderer, just as surely as I have the blood of great detectives flowing through my veins. Wait… blood… that’s it! No time to explain! I’m off to follow up on lead! Why I shouldn’t have posted the poll last time, exhibit A.  What is it with Pip and stupid hats? In return for showing her a good time, she (with Fanny as her newly-appointed understudy) beats the district boss.   Oh no! I’m so scared! Please, have mercy on me. Just kidding! Did you really think I was just sitting idly by, watching you gather sexy and powerful executives? I too have been gathering my own cast of charismatic and rich tycoons! Allow me to introduce you to my all-star lineup:   Phew. What a terrible name. I bet you got picked on a lot as a child… Oh my gosh! You’re so cute! We should hang out. Is it just masturbation if you gently caress someone who looks like you? Wait. Hold on. I’m getting an idea for a sexy magic show with you as my body double. I’m detecting a strong basic-bitch aura… THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE! Have fun facing off against my crack team of original characters. I’ll be waiting for you at the top. Mwuahaha. Oh… I don’t get one? That’s fine. It’s fine.Why I shouldn’t have posted the poll last time, exhibit B.  For all their fancy introductions, those knockoffs have zero gameplay relevance. They’re not all even on the map! The game generates the final district as normal and puts them in charge of any business that belongs to their field, and even that’s not reliable – Kip Nipple and Kelly McNormal both show up in the construction and shipping businesses, but the metalwork business is just run by some rando. It kind of stings just how irrelevant advancing cut scenes are to gameplay, but at least they don’t make your life actively harder. At this point my executives are so well-developed that any semblance of difficulty has melted away. I have more money than I know what to do with – I’ve started blowing tens of thousands on events just to do something with it. The average first-time player probably wouldn’t be in as good a position as I am right now; balancing employee and Fisticuffs growth is a delicate process that backfires on you if you underestimate how much you need of either, and not knowing which executives are best for which tasks before you unlock said executives and tasks leads to spiraling inefficiency. But that’s not a problem for us, since the game’s almost over, right?  Which makes it the perfect time to bring somebody new on board.  According to the poll… Boss, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Vlad Nibblesome. >He nods at you respectfully.  I run a moderately sized lumber company. Pretty standard stuff. I’ve been trying to get out of the house lately, and I felt like opening a new chapter in my life might shake things up. Let’s work together, shall we? Why I shouldn’t have posted the poll last time, exhibit C. Speaking of which, if you haven’t already, vote for your favorite executive here! No formal vote in the thread this time, but I am curious: since these updates are mostly just transcription and gathering screenshots, I can pump out 2000-2500 words worth of content a day without much trouble. That’s a lot to read! Especially if I’m trying to run votes alongside. Would you folks prefer me to ease up on the throttle or adjust update length somehow?
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May 1, 2021 02:48
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Doing good on updates so far, and I'm definitely seeing this game's pros. Besides the sometimes weird choice in costumes. The update length and the throttle have been just fine to me, unsure about other opinions. Here's hoping you keep putting 'em out.
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May 1, 2021 03:25
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Dopplegangers?! Boss, I'm afraid to say it, but I think it's time to declare... ...MARTIAN LAW
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May 1, 2021 15:47
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Update 8: A Cuddle Puddle Of Sweat And Narrative Resolution Another day, another new date event.  This is Flirty’s second gameplay contribution. Every other lunch date minigame requires at least a modicum of skill. Spin the Bottle has you press the button to spin the bottle, selecting either your date, Battle Butler, Business Maid…  … Or a random other executive. You then click on them to give ‘em a smooch and get a couple points of affection. And no, affection points towards BB and BM do not go to waste; affection you gain for them through Spin the Bottle (or by picking them during events) randomly unlocks outfits for one or the other once you fill up a heart.  Well, I think it’s about time to beat the game. What’s that? We haven’t had time to finish anybody’s route? I guess it’s just a really short game!     I should have known better than to trust my rivalry to such lowly beings as “employees.” I’ll have to handle this myself.  =>What if we dropped this farce and made sweet, sweet love?  =>I have problems expressing my feelings and I’m afraid of making myself vulnerable so my fears and anxieties have manifested as adversarial interactions. Say no more. I too have been constructing scenarios just to see you. Let us move past our inhibitions and learn that sometimes, it’s okay to be vulnerable. =>How about dinner and a show?  That should do it. =>Share your deeply personal back story.   =>Make out instead of watching the show. Plus one affection!>After the evening’s activities, showing perfect manners, you see your rival to the door. You know, in these past few hours, I feel like we’ve grown at least two affection points closer… And achieved the socially acceptable amount of courtship required to quickly segue into a romp in the sheets.=>Let’s bang.  =>Going to your place presents a clear and present danger to my person. Hot. If you just wanted me to kick your rear end, we could have done that a long time ago.>Wrestling each other into bed, your faces collide with kisses as deliciously vicious as your countless threats and boasting. You challenge each other beyond the realm of rivalry and business acumen. Mouths and hands, enthused loins and heaving breaths… it’s pretty loving hot. Finally, your rival sits astride you, flushed and breathless as they pin you to the bed.  =>Mumble incoherently, considering how full your mouth is with… you know. I like you even more this way – quiet and… oh. Doing that. Do that again.>Together, you and your rival share a wild tonight consummating your emnity in the most unexpected of ways. Sheets are upheaved, bodies are gyrated, and eventually you both pass out in a cuddle puddle of sweat and narrative resolution.   And, it appears that combining the old family business with our new company… why, you’re richer than you were when this first started! Huzzah! Why don’t you take a break? You deserve it. Surely nothing bad will happen to your company while you were away. What a grand idea. I think it only fitting you retire to a remote island and enjoy your wealth and status. Enjoy the glory. You’ve earned it. And a sweet victory it is. I presume that means that next game, we’ll start with Vicki and Pip already hired on. Too bad that since we have to start over, we’ll have to do their routes over again from scratch and they’ll have to share one board seat between them, but such is life. I am absolutely certain that’s correct.    You guaranteed me you wouldn’t allow them to return to their once rich and powerful status. You’ve put our whole plan in jeopardy. It won’t happen again! No matter. It won’t be long until they realize I’ve taken something MUCH more valuable from them while you kept them busy…  Yeah, what really happens is you get to pick which executive you start out with for your next run. If they have three or more affection levels you can choose to start out with them instead of default starter characters Penny Farthing and Max Gentlemen, but everyone else’s affection levels stick around, too, they just don’t matter until you hire them back on. I had to meditate on whether to start out with Pip or Vicki this time around; I’m further along on Vicki’s route, but Pip has more votes right now and she’s also far more useful now that it’s winter. So, her.  =>Nice to meet you. Pay close attention. For I have claimed ownership of your company. Your once again penniless, and therefore dishonored.=>Who the heck are you? I literally just introduced myself. All you need to know is that I’ve already been you. I think you’ll find the source of your good fortune has gone missing.=>Wow. You’ve got a great jawline.    =>No, I bought most of that. Surely, but the means by which you purchased such luxuries… Your family has been prospering with the help of a supernatural relic! That’s right. I know all about your family secret. “Sanctus Lapis Fortunae” are the only voiced words in this entire scene. Said to be blessed by the gods, it is a wellspring of good fortune for those who possess it. =>Should we… kiss?  Considering what happened earlier… While you were busy playing house with your rival, I was running an elaborate and handsome plan to retrieve the Sanctus Lapis Fortunae from your estate. =>Wow, sounds like there is a backstory there. Now, with all the stone’s powers within my clutches, and you, poor and unlucky… well, you don’t stand any chance of defeating me. Mwuahahaha! Oh, also: I’ve reinstated your rival as my minion. I frankly don’t like looking upon poor people like you, so they will be keeping you in your place for me. Mwuahahaha!>Cashious flips his cloak and mounts a black stallion that races past. He is gone, with nothing but the echo of his evil laughter trailing in the distance. Huh. Well that was weird. =>Do you think he’s single? Maybe you should ask him once you’ve toppled his empire and crushed his ambition, boss. Regrettably, I had to sell off all of your previous company’s assets and bulldoze a building or two… At great personal expense to myself, I’ve managed to procure enough capital to get you back on your feet.    And we’re back to basics. All of Pip’s Fisticuffs and Moustache were sold off (our execs’ skills were trade secrets, apparently), so she may as well be any other exec until we get her leveled back up.  We also have to come to terms with just how good a starting character Penny Farthing is. Not having her bonus at the bank meant it took me twice as long to save up enough money to nab a second executive. While Pip might be terrifying in a fight, she still needs time to train herself up and hire employees, and I just did not have the cash on hand to use her on the battlefield and pay off my debts at the same time. I shouldn’t have done this since she’s relatively low on the polls, but I needed Penny Farthing so badly I picked her as my second executive. I hope you can forgive me. With her on moneymaking duty, Pip can sweep the rest of the district.  No long-winded rival cutscene this time. We just get that one line and skip to the next district. Now that we have a little experience under our belts, the game doesn’t bother retreading ground as far as storyline goes.  It does, however, see fit to hand us enough affection to activate Penny’s first date.  So, uh, right now my employees are so pissed they’re striking at the barbershop. So much so they caused a graphical glitch.  Oh thank God, I thought the giant hand might stick around.  =>How do you do? >She rolls up her sleeve, storms towards you, and slams her elbow firmly into the nearest table.  … =>Rip your entire sleeve off and match her claw-like grip. >She grins. The name of the game is Handsies Grapples. Queen Victoria rules. First to get pinned loses.  =>How about a kiss? Oh, how cheeky. I accept.>Your eyes lock and time slows down as you await the starting call. …  =>Hold your ground. >You both grunt and strain but nobody gains ground. Your quivering bicep radiates heat. Her once confident stare is now one of respect. =>Grit your teeth. >You eke a few degrees ahead. Your arms glisten in the light. It’s now or never. =>Put your muscles on blast. >With a sudden burst of strength, she puts you on the ropes. Your iron appendage drips with sweat. You feel the table straining beneath you.   =>Blow her a kiss. >The look of shock across Penny’s face slowly replaces[sic] with a grin and explodes into laughter.  I’ll come calling again soon. Perhaps for… different reasons.>She winks at you and walks away.  Well, at least the glitch wasn’t there in the scene itself. As for the costume, I think this is one of those things that don’t need the hat.  Fortunately, she starts with a bonus hairstyle unlocked. I don’t think any other executives can say the same. While this update definitely has enough text for us to stop here, I think it needs a little something extra. A little something we can only get from a new executive. A little something… Max.  Except it’s Vicki Lestrange. Once again, I should’ve chosen Max Gentleman here (he was also a choice in the hiring screen), but we are so close to finishing Vicki’s route that I gave in and picked her. I’d like to wrap it up sooner rather than later so we can see how the final couple dates of route work before going back to spreading the love. Since we’ve already hired her, her introduction is also one slide long. Streamlining! But you know it isn’t streamlined? The next week or so of in game time, which I spend desperately trying to build up a strong enough stable to keep the ball rolling. And the next time I hire somebody… Boss, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Maximilian Gentleman.  But don’t call me Mr. Gentleman, because it sounds awful. And it reminds me of my dead father. Who graciously left me the food empire that I now own and operate! Which I would now like to merge with your company.
Falconier111 fucked around with this message at 22:54 on May 1, 2021 |
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May 1, 2021 22:42
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While I am not a fan of hunting, I respect anyone who only uses their fists to catch game, it makes it sporting.
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May 1, 2021 22:51
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I don't remember seeing the costume unlock screen for Vicki's Gothic costume, but it looks doooooooooooooooope.
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May 1, 2021 23:07
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What kind of steampunk outfit doesn't have any gears? Was that it? Just... that? The resolution was appropriate but I thought the game would last a bit longer. Barely time to get into it before it was over.
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May 1, 2021 23:19
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Poil posted:What kind of steampunk outfit doesn't have any gears? Oh sweet Alice, this rabbit hole goes far deeper than you can imagine.
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May 1, 2021 23:33
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Quackles posted:I don't remember seeing the costume unlock screen for Vicki's Gothic costume, but it looks doooooooooooooooope. That’s because I missed the shot . I was going to bring that up after I hit her next affection level.
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May 2, 2021 01:57
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Anyone who hunts Saxon Hale style has to be respected.
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May 2, 2021 03:59
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Poil posted:What kind of steampunk outfit doesn't have any gears? She has a clock on her suit, and a hat with rivets and a floodlight. I think thats good enough for some steampunk.
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May 2, 2021 05:52
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Stroth posted:Oh sweet Alice, this rabbit hole goes far deeper than you can imagine.
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May 2, 2021 08:49
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Poil posted:Please tell me it's not going to end up in Doki Doki Stanley Parable crap. "This is the story of a man named Max Gentlemanly."
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May 2, 2021 09:54
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Stroth posted:Oh sweet Alice, this rabbit hole goes far deeper than you can imagine. I’ve been thinking about this post. A lot of threads would count this as a spoiler since it brings up information about the plot you don’t have yet, but while it should have spoiler tags both in the post itself and the post that quoted it for that reason, I just cannot bring myself to get mad about it. What I do care about is spoilers about future plot points. Do not talk about those. Poil posted:Please tell me it's not going to end up in Doki Doki Stanley Parable crap. Vicki’s poetry minigame would be spectacularly lovely.
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May 2, 2021 17:12
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Falconier111 posted:I’ve been thinking about this post. A lot of threads would count this as a spoiler since it brings up information about the plot you don’t have yet, but while it should have spoiler tags both in the post itself and the post that quoted it for that reason, I just cannot bring myself to get mad about it. Falconier111 posted:It’s designed so that you can’t possibly get all the content in one game, and in fact, the story is built to gradually unfold over three or four runs, each adding new mechanics and quirks I spoil nothing.
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May 2, 2021 20:57
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Stroth posted:I spoil nothing. I suppose that's fair. While my point stands in theory, it shouldn't apply here because I spoiled that myself  Update 9: Build It, And They Will Come  Boss, the strangest thing has happened. A number of guests have gathered themselves in the accusatorium. I would have told you sooner, but I had to make tea cakes for everyone. They all claimed to have received threatening letters to assemble here. =>Did you check to see if the guests were ghosts from the accusatorium fire?  I had my construction company rebuild your accusatorium in a jiffy, as we’ll be needing just such a venue tonight. Mistress Whipple! When did you arrive? Oh no, I didn’t make enough teacakes… Worry not, I’ll have this case closed in no time! Let us make haste to the accusatorium where I shall make my long winded and dramatic reveal… with your help of course, boss.>Once Business Maid leaves the room, Pip pulls you in close.  =>Just remember, the more dramatic you make it the more legal it is.   =>Why does this inverness cape have “XXL Dog” on the tag? It used to be my partner’s detective outfit. Don’t worry about it.>You escort Pip to the accusatorium. As you look around the room, you see a rogue’s gallery of potential crime-committers eating teacakes. Each one of Pip’s initial suspects is present: Max, Penny, Gunn, Bonbon, Vlad, Summer, Sinterklaas, Fanny, Samuel, Vicki, and Antonie. *Ahem* And furthermore, I have concluded that the murderer… Is in this very room!>The room gasps at the appropriate time. Now, if you would indulge me, I shall begin to unfold the events of that evening. While interrogating the serving staff… I came across a curious series of clues. You see, apparently the victim was in a heated argument just moments before they were found dead.  =>The headlines will read: “Max Gentleman, the Brown-Haired Killer!”  Not that I did it. Yes… That’s who I would’ve suspected as well… Except! After I broke into the local coroner’s office, I discovered something quite strange. It seems the victim’s stomach contained… =>poo poo, that just means it could still be anyone. I suspect the culprit used the way to choke the victim… or at the very least tried to hide the evidence. While this may seem like a dead-end… it does prove one thing for certain. This crime was pre-meditated! The culprit deliberately brought a disguise with them to hide their identity. But that’s not all… No! I’ve been saving more dramatic twists. You see…  Also, your teacakes are ready. Not now, I’m a monologuing. I’ve spent all my free time training this horse to respond to yes or no questions with either one “clop” or two. She was the most adorable witness ever! Her testimony revealed the killer was most likely… female!>Everyone gasps and looks around the room suspiciously. And that’s not all! A homeless man was sleeping in the alley the night of the murder. While he did not witness the crime, he did see the culprit fleeing the scene of the crime. He described them as a “petite-chested” person. Well, that’s a sort of strange way to describe someone… =>Pip. I hate to point you out. But no one’s more petite than you.  =>Fine. The obvious choice is Summer.   At the scene of the crime, there was some writing in blood on the nearby wall. At first I thought it was a curious blood splatter. After all, it just said “S si rellik ehT.” Now… That may sound like just some nonsense, but looking across the street I saw the victim’s dying message to us in the reflection of a discarded mirror!  =>S for Samuel! I knew it all along.  …Based on all of this, I think it’s obvious who the real killer is. I believe my cohort and I are in agreement. It’s time… for the dramatic reveal! The killer is…=>Summer Starling!  … That’s right, I done it! And as long as there are no further questions, I’ll come along peacefully… >The generic police officers Pip hired to stand outside the room come in and cover the guilty party, carting them off. Everyone claps. Pip beams.  >Everyone finishes their teacakes and bids you farewell. I can’t believe I solved my first big case. I think this is the start of something big for me. Except the horse was a mouse. But that’s fine… It’s fine. Mistress Whipple… I was just cleaning the room and it appears someone dropped this letter, and well… I think you’ll want to see this. Ah, more clues? Unnecessary, but I do love a good clue.>She reads the letter aloud.  What?! Wait a second. Are you… are you telling me this was all staged? The text crawl visibly slows down in that panel. … =>Hey, Pip, the mystery is afoot, yea? >Pip sniffles, and looks up at you with determination in her eyes. You’re right. We can’t give up now. We’re going to get to the bottom of this! Thanks. I almost lost it there. Come to think of it… That letter is chock full of clues. I’ll need to investigate further… as well, I suppose I should go stop those officers from imprisoning the falsely accused.>Pip takes a moment to compose herself.  >Pip runs off to inform the authorities.  Eh. Honestly, I like the uniform better. While she remains my anguard in street fights (since she has a Moxie bonus there), Max’s Moxie bonus in the gym makes him a pretty good combatant as well. The firepower they can put out together, especially if I can deploy them both while cheering crowds are present to protect their employees, can be overwhelming. Quick note: every time you unlock Flirty for a character, you unlock a cheesecake/beefcake shot of them that goes in your gallery (if you go all the way back to the first update, you can see its icon in the main menu). We already got it for Vicki, and if we wanted we could go over there and take a gander. We won’t, though.  Hahahaha. Unlikely.Once again, our rival does nothing more than throw a couple unenthusiastic insults before leaving.  But wait, wasn’t there only one crown on the map last game? What could this possibly mean? I’m lagging behind like crazy when compared to my last run because half of the businesses I’ve beaten up so far give Pip shares, which is meaningless to me as long as I need her fighting or preparing to fight. At this point, though, she has so many shares that it’s worth taking her off combat duty just to pull in 3000 a pop. I sweep into the gala, grab Bonbon…  … And throw a few of the bouquets I’ve been picking up in the background at Vicki to get her fourth date. Um, Boss? I went to draw your afternoon bath, as instructed, but the tub seems to be entirely full of live snakes. …Vicki’s coming over again, isn’t she? I’ll let her in. =>What are you excited about? I’ll tell you. The experience we shared the other night proved something to me beyond the shadow of a doubt: This knowledge has opened up whole new realms of possibility, including one that I am… very much looking forward to exploring with you. You see, I have this book…>Vicki whips out a thick tome about the size of a gravestone. The cover appears to be made of scabs. Isn’t it lovely? It contains a number of enticing rituals, but there is one in particular that piques my fancy. The only issue I foresee – besides the innate difficulties in trafficking with ancient and selfish spirits from a world beyond our own… =>Obviously. What could go wrong? Oh, quite a lot of things, really. Our souls could evaporate, for one thing… For another thing, every book I’ve read says that calling upon ancient evils really dries out the skin, so make sure to moisturize. What else… what else… Ah, yes. We’ll need to gather a few ingredients for the ritual. I must warn you, these ingredients are not easy to procure. Some of them might require illegal activity, or worse.  =>A banana. >You suggest acquiring a banana, thinking this one will be easy. A cloud passes over Vicki’s features. Yes, the banana. I was worried about this one as well.  They simply aren’t hardy enough to survive a trans-oceanic journey. Only a queen could afford to import one!... Which may just be our only chance. An associate of mine in the local thieves’ guild has informed me of a ship that has recently arrived from the Caribbean. Aboard the ship is the British ambassador to the West Indies. He lost all his money in a tragic gambling accident, but he still felt compelled to bring a gift, so… His ship is laden with bananas! =>Dress up as the Queen and accept the bananas in her stead. A daring plot. Perhaps even daring enough to work!>Wasting no time, you climb onto Vicki’s shoulders and drape your custom-made Pantomime Queen costume over the two of you. To Buckingham Palace!>It takes a while to master walking, but eventually the two of you make it to the palace gates, where you stand awaiting your bananas. It’s not long before the ambassador arrives, bananas in tow, sweating profusely. He presents them to you in all their yellow glory, then looks up at you expectantly.  =>Nice bananas, stud. >The ambassador swoons. You leap out of your costume, grab the bananas, and run. The perfect crime. Well, that’s the banana taken care of…>You check ingredients on the list. You still need… =>A towel that was once used to watch the Pope.  =>Maybe it’s a mixer? That makes sense. The holy burning sensation is probably like demon liquor.  =>Let’s wash the Pope!  =>We’ll set up a bathing booth outside the Vatican and get a big banner that says “POPES BATHE FREE.” Genius! He won’t be able to resist! >You’ve barely finished setting up the booth before the Pope comes rushing out, ripping off his papal regalia in preparation. You give him the bath of a lifetime… but keep the towel. Mm. It smells like lilacs and divine retribution. Is there anything left on the list?>You check the list again. All that’s left is… =>An ounce of fresh snail ejaculate.  =>Not for me. I’m an expert at getting snails off.  =>The war. Which war? … You know what, forget I asked. =>Let’s start a brothel for snails. Intriguing. I have a colleague in Whitechapel who might be able to provide a space. =>Word of mouth. You mean, we rely on the snails themselves to do our marketing for us? …That’s absolutely brilliant. We’re filling a niche in the market. As the saying goes, build it, and they will come. My, how fun. But see now… have we gotten everything?>You check the list one final time. Looks like you got everything! You returned your mansion to admire your loot. Well, that was certainly an adventure. I don’t think I’ve ever been outside for such an extended period of time before. I wouldn’t say “normal”… Now all that remains is to wait for the next blood moon, and… Ah, Boss? The Queen’s guard, the Royal Caribbean Embassy, the PopeForce, and several amorous snails are at the door. They say you… have something of theirs?  =>Calmly explain that you’re only borrowing these things for a Satanic ritual. >You go to the door and sincerely apologize to the gathered mob for the inconvenience. This has all been a misunderstanding, you assure them, and once the Consummation of Z’Gorniax is complete, they will all be reimbursed.  >You bid them a cheerful good day, write a few cheques, and everyone goes home happy. Well handled, Boss. It seems London’s upper classes are more tolerant of the dark arts than I would have expected. Perhaps because pretty much all of them are Masons… In any case, as I was saying before we were interrupted by the consequences of our actions… All that remains is to perform the ritual. Today was certainly a trial, but think of the great pleasure in store for us once the Consummation of Z’Gorniax is complete! I’ll keep these ingredients safe until we meet again. You take care of yourself.  >With that, Vicki climbs into her carriage and departs. Who knows what your next meeting has in store?  I missed capturing the unlock screen for Vicki’s current Gothic outfit, but this time I sure did screenshot her slutty mummy costume. All that Sexual does in-game is take the towel off during the massage minigame and turn lunch date blackjack into strip blackjack, so I won’t be showing it off; it also lets you view the nude version of the Flirty gallery pic, but I definitely won’t be showing that off. But speaking of sexual, it’s time for another vote! Vicki’s costume up there should be fine, since I’ve seen even skimpier poo poo on this forum over the years, but some of the date 4/5 costumes get even wilder. I won’t be showing off the ones that are unquestionably except maybe under spoiler tags, but I need the thread’s opinion: when I unlock more risqué costumes, should I briefly show them off or make the characters wear them? Remember to bold your answers. Vote closes in 48 hours and until consensus emerges I’ll keep things  .Falconier111 fucked around with this message at 00:52 on May 3, 2021 |
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May 2, 2021 21:16
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Falconier111 posted:
Huh. Actually managed to max out Vicki's weirdness tolerance. Quite impressive.
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May 2, 2021 22:55
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Yeah, the bananas thing is historical fact - can't get them in England easily, same society that has people rent pineapples to plop on their tables just show off wealthy they are to have a pineapple.
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May 2, 2021 23:44
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