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The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Need palms read
 
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

 Need to figure this out

What does this mean?

Who the gently caress is M?
* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 02:50
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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 04:03
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

Hope that ain’t your tuggin hand, looks dry as hell

Hell ya it is. I’m so ugly it’s got “me too” on the knuckles

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 02:59
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

 So far only hearing what I already know

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 04:29
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

 I’m a cancer since my palm covers my face

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 04:48
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

Spinz posted:

M is for mom
And you love breasts

Cmon there’s like a 93% chance that would be accurate

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 05:06
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

 Hey what’s your sign?

Oh a Sagittarius? You must love finding money in an old coat!

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 05:08
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

Zybourne Clock posted:

For a full reading I'd need to see your other hand, and know which one is dominant. Assuming you're right-handed...

Your fate line appears to be absent, indicating you're happy to drift down life's river without ever steering the boat. You tend to switch careers often, either because you like it or because you're not that driven/get fired a lot. Money is likely tight in your household.

The presence of an intuition line means you're attuned to emotions -- yours and others. It is rather well defined, so you posses natural aptitude for developing psychic powers. This does not mean you already have them. If the intuition line is absent on your dominant hand, you likely suppress your gift for fear of not fitting in with others.

I'm glad to see your heart line ends between index and midde finger. The intuition line says you pick up on others' emotions; the heart line says you genuinely care about others. Had it been a straight line, you likely would have had a manipulative personality.

The headline curves downward, meaning you're an avid reader or have an active imagination. You're easily hurt or offended.

Your life line does not curve around the thumb fully, indicating stage four pancreatic cancer.

Judging height from a picture is difficult so reading the mounts is almost impossible, but your mounts of mercury and jupiter somewhat stand out. You're funny, versatile, and are probably making someone a lot of money, but not yourself. (Handedness influences this particular reading, so this might be entirely wrong.) Your love life might be flourishing at the moment, and you appreciate fine art and beauty in general.

Finally a proper hand scientist


Wait. Pancrea-what now?

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 13:04
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

MackAddie posted:

Why are the top halves of your fingers so much whiter than the rest of your hand? Poor circulation? Grabbing onto something very tightly?

Buddy these things are like big dumb baseball mitts the blood has to make tough choices sometimes

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 13:07
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

 Everyone should post your palms for analysis

These goons are saving lives here people

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 15:35
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

Spinz posted:

Hey OP you never said if my poo poo was right on or not??

It was pretty much an astrological dox I know

I plead the 5th

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 17:18
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

I gotchu fam



You’re a born hitch hiker

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 23:32
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

 Last time you gave someone the thumbs up you had to lie down for an hour

* # ¿ Jun 19, 2021 23:35
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

 Wtf is a trad wife? Like from tradidad?

* # ¿ Jun 20, 2021 01:29
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

 Oh. No not really into toxic patriarchal roles but the boob thing was spot on

* # ¿ Jun 20, 2021 02:08
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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 04:03
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Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

 A goon fuckup summoning a demon to learn about life choices

gently caress ya I’ll do it

* # ¿ Jun 20, 2021 03:48
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The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Need palms read