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InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Robo Reagan posted:

they use the horse version so i dont see a conflict of interest
there's the solution: horse version. trump wins the election and now he's horse president, send chuds to horse hospitals, rename bullets to "horse pellets"

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InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
oh here we loving go

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

trickybiscuits posted:

A serious series of lols
the one twitte account i used to check regularly was a small irish flower shop that went ALL in on brexit, got royally hosed by brexit, and now post anti-pro-brexit stuff. they can't admit they don't like brexit so their entire feed is post after post about how much "everyone" was "lied to" about brexit and posts about how they should keep brexit but go back to the way things were before brexit but while still not joining the eu

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
like anyone would pay for a man wearing a "free man" t-shirt

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
trump told a whole bunch of boy scouts about his friend's sex yacht then told reporters that they called him later to tell him it was the best speech they ever had and the boy scouts denied calling him.

trump got jealous of fauci and held a press conference to announce he was also throwing out a first pitch. both the yankees and his own staff were completely surprised
he then tweeted out that he was canceling his appearance because "meetings and other stuff". both the yankees and his own staff were completely surprised.

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
if the chuds made their own country their entire economy would revolve around terrorism. committing, hiring, and facilitating. they'd be invaded and the uk would offer chudland back to the us in exchange for honoring all the confederate, and neo-confederate, bonds they still have

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Automatic Slim posted:

It's hard to tell if this a wink and a nudge to "real" Americans or he's this tasteless.
Embarrassing.
it was during one of his shut downs so either A: this was the cheapest option or B: he and not a single person on his staff thought to, or could figure out how to, use the chefs at his local hotel restaurant.
most likely some combination of both, he thought of the mcdonalds option and just didn't bother to think of anything else and no one felt like arguing with him because he considered it a genius solution. also he wasn't going to be talked out of mcdonalds

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

withak posted:

Wasn’t there a follow up saying that the koi feeding thing was fine, aside from our highly presidential boy acting like a goober. They know better than to give VIPs more food than the koi can handle. Virtually everyone dispenses some amount of food with the spoon then loses interest and scatters the rest.
the entire "scandal" is resolved just by showing them both throwing the food in instead of just trump.

is there seriously not a single republican that can be moved? there's nothing not a single one of them want? there's no "red dog" republicans? what the gently caress?

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Steadiman posted:

snip
Just like the ECMO machine, i.e. finding the most convoluted, dangerous, and expensive way to bypass getting a free vaccine, now they're gonna get our pilot's license and a plane so they can avoid vaccine mandates on airlines.

Owning the libs by spending thousands on getting your instrument rating so you can fly short distances at ridiculous cost within insanely strict, and highly enforced, federal guidelines. Now that's what I call freedom.

I'm all for it though, if they all avoid airlines then I'm gonna feel a lot safer on them.
he's gonna save a BUNCH of money not taking the "landing" part of the flight instructions

kazil posted:

There's no chance Donald doesn't think that if he wins in 2024 he can have another term afterward
he was "joking" more and more about how he should get a third term because the democrats and the media was mean to him, people started chanting it.

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
"the clot shot" is an adorable name considering chuds would never have any idea that that was ever a danger if johnson hadn't announced it themselves and the media hadn't then informed the chuds. "they MUST be evil! i spent hours and hours and days poring over secret information i somehow hacked into with my computer and, having read their press release..."

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
facebook breaking is funny. mostly though it's nice that something bad happened to someone who deserved it for once.

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
im-loving-possible. several inspectors would have spontaneously exploded, there's no way a fire inspector would let something like that slide, it's not even close to ada compliant, and any electronically sealed lock needs to auto unlock in the case of fire so the solution would have been as simple as tripping the fire alarm not cut cages open

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

QuarkJets posted:

idk is it compliant if you can easily get out but not in? I have seen a lot of keyless doors set up that way
that's push bars and magnets which would have to be tied into power and fire. the solution would be to flip the fire alarm and the doors unseal.
i mean all of these rules exist to prevent this exact situation
also all access control systems have their own software and hardware, and none can be disrupted by losing facebook or even the internet, as long as they had power they should have been fine. or they custom made their security and access control systems but that's just nonsense.

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
so...they just get to move on? war on christmas is back, border crisis is back, they get to just...pretend nothing ever changed? we gotta pretend these are major issues again? that their former first lady isn't on tape saying who gives a gently caress? just gonna move on and pretend they still have the moral high ground?

The Last Call posted:


It's happening!
Nothing happens.
for some reason, the "end game" of q is that this random reddit guy gets 100+ free acres and a bunch of money for a party.
i wanna see the "q drop" that made him think that (also his idea of "a fair' outcome" is something the government already did decades ago for his white great grandfathers but not for any minorities. :thunk:)

InsertPotPun fucked around with this message at 19:33 on Oct 5, 2021

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

old beast lunatic posted:

I always thought we'd get the majority of people to agree on climate once towns started burning down. I also thought people would realize a pandemic is real when it's closing in on total casualties of the civil war.

I'm a loving idiot and the general population is much dumber than me. That's terrifying.
"climate change isn't real! climate change isn't real! climate cha-oh...i don't like to talk about politics but still think we shouldn't do anything." *folds arms and pouts*

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
*eight years of 'cry more, lib"*
*eight solid years of screaming and crying*
*four years of "gently caress your feelings"*
*a solid 8 months of non-stop crying and weeping while holding 'gently caress biden' signs*

we need to create a separate american politics that's just wrestling but with political names so these chuds can get this poo poo out of their system where it won't effect the rest of us. every four years the top "democrat" wrestles the top "republican" and gets a belt. everyone gets social advances and they get to "own the libs". "lol stupid lib! we DESTROYED you in the ring last night! lol cry more lib!! lol now i'm going to the hospital because, for some reason, it's free now?"

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Play posted:

Shouldn't be too hard to find hundreds of people saying poo poo like this literally six months ago. Where's the loving vaccine genocide? We're all still alive and doing peachy, it's you fucks who are dying in droves!!
in six months they "don't talk about politics" *cross arms and pout*

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Rod Hoofhearted posted:

My mom had two large dogs, ages 12 and 14. The 14 year old’s liver stopped working so she had a vet come to her home and euthanize him in the front yard surrounded by friends and neighbors.

About 2 months later, the 12 year old stopped urinating or pooping all of a sudden and was obviously distressed. My mom took him to the vet and it turned out he had a giant tumor blocking him up, and the vet didn’t think it was operable. They gave him some leftover cake they had in the fridge before putting him down.
the last thing my cancer dog did was haul himself to his feet, walk a few steps away from us petting him and crying, and laid back down and sighed. an angry grump to the very end

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
lol remember when trump's daughter wife and the cursed doll wouldn't let the secret service use their bathrooms so they all had to go down the street to use obama's until some chud agent broke his toilet?

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
chuds: "saying it's hard for a minority to get id is the real racism :smuggo: :smuggo:"
also chuds: "you drove here by yourself????"

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

funeral home DJ posted:

Every time I read posts from thedonald.win or whatever it's called, it makes me realize that it's absolutely nothing but a loving miracle that this country hasn't been burned down to the ground in the last 200+ years. People like this have been around since the dawn of time, and I can't see how on earth we survived so long when people like these morons are taking over local governments and running the proverbial bus off the cliff.
they have more time on their hands now. that's the best part: if they weren't so comfortable, pampered, and safe, they wouldn't be able to walk the streets screaming about how much of a victim they are. conservatives are people who use their privilege to scream about how oppressed they are. people who are working, suffering, busy, don't have time to follow a politician around the country or go to school board meetings when they don't even have kids.

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Valko posted:

So in the unlikely event that they actually manage to pull this off what would the charge be? I think a decent defence could make a case for manslaughter, unfortunately.
"mishandling livestock"

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Strong Sauce posted:

lying all the time
"i'm so outraged here's a picture of my lap"

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
GOD! when will people learn to think for THEMSELVES?? according to https://www.patriotheroespikachu.com this is all fake! i read it myself! why can't everyone just do the same research themselves??

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Claeaus posted:

What are the antivaxxers basing their "more people are dying from the vaccine than the virus" on? Are they just saying it?
the less you hear about something the more it is true because obviously "they" don't want you to know the facts. i've heard plenty about unvaxxed dying but virtually nothing about the vaxx killing people therefore, by the transitive properties, the number must be astronomically higher!
that they're not saying it is proof that it's true.
then they just go and deny it's true which is just like double confirmation.
therefore it is double true and the death rate is higher than we know.

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
"i fear this might be the end! the end of he whole miserable thing! i cry! i scream! i beg for mercy from the uncaring earth but receive no response! how can i go on??? i am beset by evil on all sides!! this is the end!!!!"

*six months later* "loving liberals are ruining sports!" *burns their shoes*

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

The Last Call posted:

snip
He missed a certain detail
success? what is it she has succeeded at exactly?

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
"look the people under me are just not good at following orders" is TOTALLY the thing you want to hear from someone, "i'm unable to make my employees do things" is the best thing to hear from management, i can see why he has his job

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

NoEyedSquareGuy posted:

He really wants to stop all the literal murder gangs in the LAPD but oh jeez they just won't listen to him.
"i have all the evidence against the drug smugglers right here your honor! oh geez i dropped it! lord have mercy my pants fell down and now i'm peeing all over it! noooooooo!!"

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Stoatbringer posted:

Yes, yes, all the pieces on Trump nine-dimensional chess board are all nearly in place. If only we mortals had the intelligence to understand a fraction of his great plan. He may look like a fat sack of crap choking down fish delights on the golf course, but every single word and gesture is part of a well-oiled political machine, the likes of which the world has never seen. Tick, tock, any day now, juuuuust you wait!
"i can't wait to see the looks on these people's faces when trump jumps out of that coffin to confront them with the evidence he's been building! oooo-hohoho man this is all part of it: it's going to be so sweet when he claws through the dirt!"

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

its_my_birthday posted:

like 95% of the q nonsense is undiagnosed schizophrenia, right? so what is it about our country that makes it so common?
people in power keep listening to them because they believe chuds and nuts can be controlled

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

LordSloth posted:

I WILL DETERGE ELSEWHERE!


I guess it's time for the right to switch to OxiClean's "White Revive"
black guy in the commercial: this is not for me!!!

horse on the box: gimme!!

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Hazo posted:

Now instead of furry weirdos it's literal Nazis who would brutally kill us and our families if they got the chance
i'll never forgive nazis for making me tolerate furries and juggalos.

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan
aaaah the republican party platform: "be happy for the scraps we're constantly trying to take from you"

Random Stranger posted:

Super Mario Bros is a bad movie no matter how you slice it, but it's such a unique and off-the-wall film that it's worth watching anyway.
there's a sex worker grinding her heel on the desk sargent's shoulder when he's asking the mario associates for their information. it is not addressed or acknowledged.

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

MrQwerty posted:

Donald Trump Cinematic Universe in chronological order:

  • Vampire's Kiss (1988)
  • Back the the Future Part II (lol it all happened) (1989)
  • Gremlins 2 (for the one that looks presidential and only shows up in the movie to do so) (1990)
  • Home Alone 2 (doing something so uncharacteristic it is shocking) (1992)
  • Super Mario Bros. (1993)
  • The Celebrity Apprentice (2004-2007)
  • The Presidency of the United States of America (2016-?)

feel free to add to the list

edited in BTTF because I'm also very presidential
1989: ghosts can't do it.
NSFW FOR TRUMP KISSY FACE

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Lowen SoDium posted:

This little poo poo still hasn't been convicted?
ummm he SHOT someone, with a GUN. that pretty much makes him a folk hero to americans. or are you a commie traitor that hates guns??

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

goatface posted:

Trillion dollar coin should be minted from something good and radioactive so no fucker nicks it.
make it out of chocolate and the first person to eat it is president

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Aerith Gainthborough posted:

Sorry guys I was thinking of Rob Schneider for some reason instead of John Lovitz.
Aardvark feel free to mock and ridicule me for being an idiot.
I will go watch my box set of The Critic and try to repent.
jon lovitz broke andy dick's nose on a bar for disrespecting phil hartman.

InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

Der Kyhe posted:

And by disrespecting you obviously mean "indirectly causing his death by making Phil's wife relapse and go unstable because of cocaine"?
no, i mean, according to everyone but lovitz and dick, dick told lovitz to "be careful" or he'd "put the hartman curse" on him too.
then lovitz slammed his face into the bar.

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InsertPotPun
Apr 16, 2018

Pissy Bitch stan

pacerhimself posted:

Gosh how could beef prices be rising when we had terrible drought through much of the prairies all summer.
and we protected all the precious meat packers by...getting rid of any covid precautions and letting a chunk of their workers die, shouldn't they be lowering their prices just because of how grateful they are??

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